Chapter 5: It Hurts Too Much

She ran out of the funeral. She ran without her daughter. She was hoping Noah Puckerman wasn't going to ask her little girl any questions about her life. She wasn't sure where she was going. She just ran until she wasn't anywhere near the funeral home.

"Rachel!" Finn yelled. He was about to run after her but was stopped by Puck. "Dude? You got to be here with your family. I'll go after her."

"But-" Finn wasn't able to stop Puck. Puck just ran and looked out for Rachel. She was nowhere near. He slowly drove by the area to find her. He found her sitting on a bench at the park. She was hugging her knees to her chest.

Puck took a deep breath before getting out of his car. He slowly walks towards Rachel. The last time he's seen her like this was seven years ago. When she broke up with Finn. Puck tried to comfort her, tried to place his hand on his shoulders, but she moved back.

She was rocking herself back and forth. She couldn't look at him. She couldn't listen to him. She didn't even want to be near him. "Berry, we need to talk." He says.

Rachel shook her head, sobbing. "Listen Berry, we need to talk. We need to talk about why you suddenly came back. We need to talk about why you and Finn come back seven years later. We need to talk about that little girl..." Puck knew he took it too far. He just needed to know why the little girl was mixture of him and her.

Rachel suddenly looked at him. "Don't you dare talk about her like that! You don't get to ask about her." Rachel screamed while sobbing.

"Could you please just tell me what's going on? I know you and Finn ran off for a reason." For the past seven years, Puck never forgot about her.

She was so upset that night when they were in his room. That night felt good but he felt guilty for going behind his friend's back. When he didn't hear from her for days, he was depressed. He tried to move on with his life. He really did. All he could think about was Rachel.

Rachel this, Rachel that, where could Rachel be? And his heart crushed when he found out Finn was no longer in Lima either. He didn't know where they were but he knew they were together. And it hurt.

"I don't want to talk to you right now! Please, leave me alone! I came here for a reason, Puck." She has never called him Puck. It's always been Noah.

Puck angrily stood up. "Oh, so now it's Puck? All your life it's been Noah."

"Please go away." Rachel begged.

"Not until you tell me who that little girl is! I know she's not Finn's! She's got that Jewish nose-" He was cut off by Rachel who stood up as well.

She needed Finn. She needed Finn to be there for her. She needed Finn to scare off Puckerman..Though she felt selfish for only thinking about herself when Finn's going through a rough time in his life. "She's not your daughter." Rachel lied. "She's Finn and I's daughter. She's our precious little star."

"You're lying." Puck said. "Just tell me the truth and I'll leave you alone." Puck watched her every moved. She slowly calmed herself after crying.

"You can't threaten me, Puckerman." Rachel yelled.

"But I just did. Look, all I want is an explanation. Finn, my best friend, and you my favorite girl left. You guys just left like that, without saying a goodbye." Puck was trying his best not to cry.

Real men don't cry. Suck it up, Puckerman. "I figured you'd come back for Hanukah with your dads. My mom worried about you. My sister kept asking about you. I didn't know what to tell them because I didn't know anything. You screwed up, Berry. You screwed up more than anyone I know."

It was silent between them. Rachel didn't want to listen to the words of Puckerman but she couldn't help herself. She's hurt him. She's realized that. She's realized if she told Puckerman the truth, she would even hurt him more. It would hurt Emily. "I need to use the bathroom." She pushed Puck away and Puck saw her running again.

Puck ran his hands through his shaved Mohawk. He was furious. He was furious with Berry. He decided to get back inside his car and drive home. He had no tension going back into that funeral home where he knew Rachel would be. He wasn't sure how long they would be in Lima for but he decided that he'd give Rachel Berry some time. That he'd wait for her to come to him.

That night was horrible for Rachel. She curled up in a ball and cried. They stayed in the guest room in Carole and Kurt's house. Carole and Kurt decided to get away for a weekend and trusted Finn and Rachel to watch over their home.

Finn has notice that Rachel's been crying a lot. Every time he tried to comfort her, she pulled away, and every time he would speak, she'd look away.

Something happened when Puckerman left the funeral home. He could feel it. He hasn't heard his wife smile, laugh, or sang since that happened.

The next day was worse. Rachel didn't get up from bed and it was the afternoon. She was always happy and cheery for Emily. "Rach? Rach? You alright? I'm really worried about you." Finn said as he went back into their room. All night he's heard her crying.

Rachel shook her head. She couldn't even take a moment to breath. "Rachel? You need to breath, okay. I heard you all night. You have me worried sick..."

Rachel shook her head once again. "Think about Emily."

And again he got the same response. "Did Puckerman do something to you? Did you guys have a conversation?"

Finn waits for a while for Rachel to respond.

Nothing. "Look, I'm sorry. I'm sorry if I let Puck ran after you but he told me I needed to be there for mom and Kurt." Finn places his hands on her shoulder but Rachel moved it his hand away. "Rachel! I need to know what you're feeling."

Her body was shaking. She had to say something so Finn could leave her alone. "Emily. I want our daughter."

"She's out with her grandpas." Finn said.

Rachel looks at him with swollen eyes and rosy cheeks. "Then leave."

"What?" Finn asked.

"I don't want anyone but Emily."

Finn just nods and stood up. "Fine. But I'm going to find out what made you put yourself in the position you're in now. This isn't the Rachel Berry I know."

Rachel knew she wanted Finn the whole time yesterday when she and Puck had an argument. Today, she just couldn't see Finn. She knew it was wrong to lie to her daughter about who her real father is. Finn is the only father she's ever known.

If her daughter found out about Noah Puckerman, things wouldn't be the same.

LeRoy and Hiram came back with Emily and stayed with Rachel. Finn texted Kurt if he knew anything about Puck or if he still lived in the same place. Kurt gave him his home address. Actually, it wasn't a home. It was a small apartment in their hometown. Finn knocked on the door about once or twice.

He knocks on the door again. Puck opens the door and wasn't expecting to see Finn. "What happened when you found Rachel? She cried all day after that, cried all night, and she's crying now. She can't even take a breather and she hasn't eaten anything. What'd you do to her, Puckerman?"

"I told her how I really felt when you and her ran off like that. I told her how my family took the news with Rachel. They thought she'd come back for Hanukah that year, since we spend every damn holiday with each other. Look? You and Rachel weren't meant to be. Me and Rachel were meant to be. I told her she was my favorite girl..She wouldn't tell me the real reason about why you guys left and who that little girl was." Puck explained, trying to stay calm.

"Me and Rachel weren't meant to be?" Finn asked confused.

"Yeah. That day at Artie's party she was furious with you. I saw her sobbing when you told her that you weren't ready to be married."

"She told me that part."

"And I took her to my room. It was a night that I can never forget."

"And you also changed her life, asshole!" Finn yelled.

"What?" Puck asked as he took a step back.

"Did you know how hard it is for her? Did you know that she's never made it to Broadway? She's not living her dream? Did you know that's all she ever thinks about? It hurts her so much that I keep telling her that she will live her dream. Look, she didn't want me to tell you but I feel horrible. You're my best friend." Finn took a deep breath. He had to let the cat out of the bag. He couldn't keep it a secret any longer. He wasn't Emily's father. "Emily Kate Berry is your daughter. That night that you can't forget, she found herself being pregnant. She rejected NYADA and asked if we could move to New York with her fathers. Thankfully, they were supportive. That little girl is yours, Puckerman. She's your daughter. And it kills me every time she calls me, 'Daddy' it doesn't seem right."

Finn wanted to punch himself in the stomach for letting everything out. Puck allows him inside the house. "I knew the minute I looked at her yesterday that she was my daughter. She's a spitting image of me and Rachel."

"Rachel asked me to be her father."

Puck sighed heavily. "Dude, man. I'm sorry."

"I can't lie to that little girl. I think that's why Rachel's been so upset lately."

"First Beth, now Emily, I'm only twenty-four and a father of two." Puck took a seat next to his best friend. "What are we going to tell Berry?"

"I'm going to talk to Rachel. She'll be angry, she'll cry even more, but I have to do this. Lying to that little girl is like hurting her. She deserves to know her real father. Why? Because I never knew my dad. Your dad ran off when you were young."

Puck nods. He gives Finn a manly hug. "Thanks, Mann. I had trouble sleeping last night."

"No, problem bro."

"Berry is going to hate your guts." Puck says, letting out a small laugh.

"It's for the better. I want that little girl to know you."

"Is she badass?" Puck asked jokingly.

"She's tough. She throws temper tantrums every here and there."

"That's so Puckerman genes." Puck laughs.

Finn laughs along. "I'll give you a call, man. After I talk to Rachel and after we talk to Emily."

Puck walks his best friend out. He waves goodbye and closes the door behind him.

He had two daughters. A nine-year old and a seven-year old. He sees Beth constantly and was hoping that his daughters would get along with each other.

He had to take back those last words that he said to her. Those words; You screwed up, Berry. You screwed up more than anyone I know.

He was hoping it wasn't to late for him and Berry.