A/N: Time marches on. . .
(Stephenie Meyer still owns Twilight and all of its characters.)
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Passage
Bella
I looked out of the window that faced the Cullen's enormous backyard and watched as Edward played football with Emmett, their cousin Jasper and Emmett's best friend, Paul. Although they were in their second year of college and Edward was a high school senior, he looked just as grown up and mature.
He had changed so much since we first met in Miss Cope's third grade class. He was practically a man now. He was tall, muscular and shaved every day. He was also extremely popular with the girls. He had a reputation for being a good kisser and he apparently possessed a wonder peen. Not that I would know anything about that. . . . I'd been in the friend zone for the past ten years.
I was okay with that status- mostly. I just wondered sometimes what it said about me that I spent a lot of time with the most handsome, most sought after boy in my senior class and all we ever did was hang out, talk and watch movies. Not that I wanted to make out with him or anything- okay, I admit my curiosity was piqued. I just wanted to know if his lips were as soft and warm as they looked or if his fingers were really as magical as Lauren Mallory insisted.
A part of me knew what I had with Edward was much better. I knew the real Edward. I knew his secrets and his dreams and his fears. He loved to play the piano and wanted to teach music, he actually read Romeo and Juliet not just the Cliff Notes, he hated girls who wore a bunch of perfume and lip gloss, he had no intention of pursuing a professional career baseball although he was our school's star player, he was afraid of the dark and his favorite food was actually the prune cobbler his Aunt Charlotte made for Thanksgiving every year.
Yeah, I was definitely lucky. My best friend was handsome, smart, funny and kind. Sometimes I just wished- wondered if. . .
"Bella, sweetheart? Are you okay?"
"Huh?" I was pulled from my daydream about Edward by his mom. I'm sure I was blushing like an idiot.
I had gone to the Cullen house to get my prom dress altered. It was a bit too long but otherwise the royal blue dress was amazing. It fit me in all the right places and my skin didn't look so translucent.
"You were a million miles away," Esme Cullen, Edward's mom smiled. She was like a second mother to me. She and my mom, Renee had become best friends over the years just like me and Edward.
"Sorry. Just thinking about. . .stuff,"
"So, are you excited about the prom?" she asked as she stuck another pin in the hem of my dress. Thank God for Esme's sewing skills; my mother used to buy new shirts every time the buttons fell off.
"Yeah, I guess." If I were being honest, which I wouldn't be with Esme, not about this- I wished I was going with someone else. . .Eric Yorkie was nice but he was kind of geeky. He totally caught me off guard when he asked me and he was the only one who did so. . .Edward was actually the one who talked me into giving him a chance.
"Oh honey, what's wrong? I thought every girl looked forward to going to the prom. I know I did," she smiled brightly. The reason behind her smile? Carlisle Cullen. Edward's insanely beautiful dad. He and Esme had been together forever. They were high school sweethearts and were even more in love almost twenty- five years later.
"It's just weird, I guess- pretty soon we'll graduate and then go off to college. It's like all of these rites of passage are coming so fast. So much is changing," I knew I was being melodramatic but I couldn't tell her that I was freaked out about going off to school without Edward. I was headed to the University of Arizona and he was going to the University of Chicago. A million miles away from each other. My heart suddenly hurt as I gazed out into the backyard again. Edward was no longer outside. He would probably disappear from my life just as fast.
Esme stood and grabbed both my hands. "You are like a daughter to me and I love you very much, Bella. Yes, things are changing but there are some things that will always remain the same- your connection to this family and Edward will never be broken,"
Damn Esme for making me cry and feel better at the same time. I hugged her tightly.
"What's going on in here?" Edward asked from the doorway. He was sweaty and grimy and looked absolutely delicious.
When Esme and I broke a part, I wiped my eyes and turned to face him. I was about to say something sarcastic but the expression his face made me change my mind. He gaped at me and swallowed a few times before he walked into the room. I looked at Esme who had a twinkle in her eye and a smirk on her face.
"Wow, Bella you look- beautiful," he said softly.
I frowned and looked down at myself and remembered I was in full on prom gear. I even had my hair pinned up to see how the style would look. I smiled at him and took notice of the predatory look in his eyes.
His mother seemed very amused.
"Uh- yeah, thanks. So Esme, are we done?" I cleared my throat and placed a hand at my neck, which I'm certain was scarlet.
She chuckled. "Yes, we are. Place the dress on the hanger. I'll be right back," she left Edward and I alone and I was immobile.
"So, are you excited about prom?" Edward asked the exact question his mom had asked five minutes earlier as he fingered the fabric of the dress. "Blue looks really good on you," he smiled faintly.
"I'm kind of excited and you're just saying that because blue is your favorite color,"
"What? No, seriously it's good- really good. You need some help?" he extended his hand to help me off the foot stool.
I took his hand and when I was securely on the floor, he held on tighter for some reason. He took a step closer to me and my heart leapt to my throat. He stared at my mouth. He was going to kiss me.
"He asswipe what's taking you so long- whoa, hey Bella. Nice dress. You look hot," Emmett winked as he interrupted our moment.
I quickly moved away from Edward and almost tripped over the footstool. "Hey- hey Em." I croaked.
Edward sighed harshly.
Emmett looked from me to Edward and laughed. "Did I interrupt something?"
My eyes flew to Emmett's. "No, what are you- no- I've got to get out of this dress- I mean not like right here but in private- like by myself, alone- good grief," I muttered as I made a hasty exit to the hall bathroom.
I leaned against the door to catch my breath. That day something had shifted and I was scared as hell that my thoughts about Edward Cullen had suddenly crossed a line.
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Mistletoe
Edward
I brought in a stack of firewood and sat in on the hearth while I kept my eyes glued to the front door.
"Are you okay son? You looked stressed. The semester is over, you should try and relax," My father appeared behind me and placed a hand on my shoulder.
"I'm okay," I lied.
I was extremely nervous. It was Christmas Eve and I would see Bella tonight. I hadn't seen Bella in person in almost three years after we parted ways on pretty shitty terms. We'd half assed apologized and made up over e-mail but I still missed having her in my life. I wondered what she'd been up to and whether or not she had a boyfriend. I don't know where the fuck that had come from. . .Bella was totally allowed to date or have a boyfriend, I hadn't been a saint over the past three years. Not that it mattered- we weren't a couple or anything. I had ruined all chances of that ever happening on the night of our senior prom. . . .
"So, are you leaving already?" I asked her.
"Yeah, Eric's allergies are acting up, so he's going to take me home,"
What a spaz, I almost felt bad for paying him to ask Bella out. But at least it kept her from the clutches of Mike Newton and the asshole brigade who had bets on who would be getting laid on prom night. It's not like she couldn't get a date on her own, I just figured Eric would be a safe choice, so I told him I would pay him to ask her out. He was totally freaked out and damn near had an asthma attack when she said yes.
"Man, it's so early,"
"I know I really wanted to do something. . . .else," she shrugged.
She looked so damned beautiful. She was by far the most beautiful girl at the prom. Even my date, Lauren couldn't hold a candle to her especially with all that bright red lipstick plastered on her mouth. She was definitely going to have to wipe that shit off before she put her lips on me.
"Something else, huh?" I frowned intrigued by her comment.
She blushed. "What are you doing tonight?" she asked suddenly.
"Um- I- don't know. I think we're hanging out with some of Lauren's friends," I lied. We already had a hotel room reserved thanks to Emmett. He came in handy sometimes. I hated lying to Bella but I didn't want to throw something like that in her face. It seemed cruel.
"I see. Can I ask you a question?" she asked shyly.
I knew I should have said 'no' based on the tone of her voice. "Yeah,"
"Were you um- were you going to kiss me yesterday at your parent's house?"
Yes. "No," I squeaked out as I cleared my throat. "I was just helping you off the stool. We both know how clumsy you are," I teased.
She smiled faintly and held her head down. "I wish you would have," she admitted softly.
"You wish I would have what?" I played dumb and begged her silently not to do this.
I cared about Bella, a lot, she was about the only perfect thing in my life and I didn't want to cross that line. Well, I actually thought about it but I had to be strong for the both of us. If we hooked up and it didn't work out and I lost her. . .I would be utterly devastated. I was such a selfish bastard.
She rolled her eyes and placed a hand on her hip. "Stop playing dumb, Edward. You know what I mean. I wish you would have kissed me. I'm just so tired of people thinking I'm so. . . innocent. I have thoughts and desires you know- I was actually contemplating losing my virginity to Eric-,"
"What?" I yelled before she finished. "I'm going to kick his ass. That wasn't part of the deal!"
Fuck my life.
"What are you talking about? Deal? What deal? Did you have a bet with him?" she frowned.
And that's how I lost my best friend. Bella was beyond furious when she found out what I did and how I had basically been threatening guys to stay away from her. And the worst part is when she asked me if I did all of it to keep her for myself- she had this look in her eyes and in that moment I knew if I would have said "yes", I would have been forgiven but instead, I hurt her and said "no". Because I was confused and stupid. Oh yeah, and selfish.
That first year of college was absolute hell. I'd never been without Bella and I didn't realize how dependent I'd become on her friendship. It was really fucked up that I could no longer even call her to tell her about my day or to ask her opinion on something important. I floundered and almost lost my scholarship. She sent me an email during our second year to say she was sorry to hear about Aunt Charlotte passing away. I replied back and asked her how she'd been doing and thank God she replied. It opened up the first dialogue between us in two years.
Over the past year we'd sent e-mails here and there but things still seemed a little strained. I wanted to move past this shit. I wanted my friend back. I wanted my Bella.
I rubbed my palms against my pants and cleared my throat.
"So um, is it just us and the Swan's tonight?" I hoped my inquiry came across as casual. I was still curious about Bella's relationship status. I wondered if she'd lost her virginity. I was such an ass.
My cousin, Jasper smirked at me. He and Emmett had given me shit about Bella every since Emmett caught me almost kissing her three years ago.
"Actually I think Bella is bringing a friend this year," my mother said as she flitted around and adjusted decorations.
My heart sank. I cleared my throat. "Oh really," My voice cracked.
Emmett laughed loudly and Rosalie, now his fiancée, stared at him confused. He leaned down and whispered in her ear. No doubt clueing her in on our history.
My father clapped me on the back. "You want a shot of whiskey to calm your nerves?" he asked.
"My nerves are fine. Why would I be nervous?" I laughed nervously.
Suddenly the doorbell rang and I desperately wanted that shot of whiskey.
My father crossed the living room and answered the front door. Renee's musical laughter was the first thing I heard after Charlie's grumbling. They walked through the door and exchanged hugs with my parents. But it was just the two of them.
I started to hyperventilate. Jasper appeared next to me. "Breathe boy, breathe,"
"Edward!" Renee screeched as she rushed over and enveloped me in a warm hug. I hugged her tighter and missed Bella even more.
"Look at you, still so handsome. I've missed you so much. Look at him Charlie, he's a sight for sore eyes," Renee gushed.
"Yeah, I guess he is," Charlie mumbled as he waved at me.
"Where's Bella?" I blurted out.
"Real subtle. Hello Renee, don't you look fetching tonight. Is that a reindeer on your sweater?" Jasper interrupted as he kissed Renee's cheek.
"Yes, and look- his nose lights up!" she gushed.
It was then that I realized Bella's mom had been in the eggnog already.
"Mom said Bella was bringing friend," I tried again.
Renee's smiled. "Oh yes, yes, Al. They'll be here any minute. Bella wanted to drive herself for some reason. Oh Esme, the tree turned out so nice," Renee left me and joined my mother on the other side of the room.
Al? What kind of douchey ass name was Al? Fuck a shot; I needed a tall glass of whiskey. Just as I was about to make my way to the kitchen, the doorbell rang again and I was once more frozen in place.
"I'll get it!" Emmett yelled.
I swear, I could feel her and smell her before he opened the door. But when it opened nothing could prepare me for the stunning creature on the other side. Her hair had grown out and it hung in deep waves down her back. It was a lighter color that that made her brown eyes sparkle.
The "freshmen fifteen" she complained about had landed in all of the right places. She looked amazing. A goddess. She practically hung from Emmett's neck because of the way he picked her up and swung her around.
Once her feet were planted on the ground she turned over her shoulder and smiled all big and full of teeth at Al the Douche on the porch. She extended her hand and pulled a petite girl inside the house. A girl? Al? What the hell? Was Bella a lesbian now? My brain couldn't even register that possibility.
"Man, her girlfriend is kinda cute," Jasper teased as he pushed past me and went to greet Bella. Everyone made their way over to Bella and her friend and college roommate, Al aka Alice, who from the way she was looking at Jasper was definitely not a lesbian. Unless she was bisexual. . .I digress.
Bella stood in the foyer and stared expectantly at me. I realized I hadn't moved an inch.
"Edward?" my mother called out concerned.
I almost tripped over my own feet as I made my way towards Bella. I hugged her tightly and buried my face in her hair reacquainting myself with her scent.
"Bella," I whispered her name reverently.
She stared up at me and smiled. "Hi Edward,"
I noticed our family and Al had left us alone as they moved to the kitchen.
"I missed you so fucking much. You look amazing. How have you been?" I moved a strand of hair from her face and placed it behind her ear.
"Good, things are good. Better now," she brushed the hair off my forehead.
I grabbed her hands and gripped them tightly. "Bella, I am so fucking sorry for how things ended before we went away to college. I was a complete ass and although I don't deserve it I'm asking for another chance to be your friend,"
"It's in the past Edward. You're forgiven. I've missed you too. Let's start over," she suggested. She seemed so much more laid back than I remembered.
"Edward, Bella! We're eating dinner!" Renee yelled.
"We should probably get in there," Bella laughed. She stepped away from me and I looked up and saw an opportunity.
I grabbed her elbow and pointed up to the ceiling. Her eyes widened and she looked terrified but before she could respond I pulled her close to me and kissed her. It started off chaste but soon our lips began to move against each other with fervor. She was so soft and smelled so good. She tugged at the hair on the base of my neck and I slipped my tongue in her mouth and she pulled away. She covered her mouth and stared wide-eyed.
"What-why-Edward, I have a boyfriend. His name is Jacob and we've been dating for a while. It's pretty serious I – shouldn't we- oh god," she rushed out of the foyer and went to join our families in the dining room leaving me alone under the mistletoe.
End Notes- Ouch. Still hanging in there? Thanks for reading and reviewing! ;-)
