AN the second: new chapter is chapter one.

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So im largely scribbling these out when there's too many things in my head and I have to get the most obvious things out. AOU was a very frustrating movie. Im aware they aren't great, but I'm okay with that. They're in the way and I need to put them on paper. Er, the Internet. I'll get to more fun stuff, but I'm doing the Farm first. My brother and I have had a headcanon for forever that Clint owns a farm he inherited way back when and that there's a bloke named Greg who watches it. After AOU we just gave Greg a wife and kids. Tbh I didn't mind the farm or clints family in the movie at all, it's actually kinda neat, it's a very different take on him. My problem is with brutasha. Also I still like Clintasha way better.

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The Avengers woke the next morning to find Greg, Laura, Clint, Natasha, and all the kids already awake. Greg was reading a newspaper and Laura was making pancakes. Neither of these was surprising. The surprising part was that Clint Barton was also making pancakes and Natasha Romanoff-Barton was setting the table while wearing Clint's shirt and lavender fuzzy socks and aided by a flaxen-haired six-year-old.

"Forks go on the left side, sweetheart."

"But you eat with your right hand."

"Not when you're using a knife, then it goes in your left hand."

"Oh. So it goes on the left when you're using a knife? But we aren't using knives for pancakes."

"Yeah but that's where it goes anyway. Keeps it consistent."

"Do we just assume everyone uses knives all the time? We don't even use forks all the time."

Natasha laughed. Actually laughed, not the scary dark chuckle thing she does. A genuine laugh.

"You look like you're feeling better," Steve told her as he went to join Greg with his newspapers.

"A little bit. You?" She said as she set cups out.

"Yeah, actually. It's really nice out here. It's quieter. And there's some, homey comforts," he said, gesturing to the newspapers. She smiled.

The Avengers and Greg's family were soon seated and eating blueberry pancakes happily.

"So how many people know about you two?" Tony asked with his mouth full, pointing at Clint and Natasha with his fork.

"Um, Coulson, Fury, Hill, Hill is actually where Tasha's necklace came from, aaaaannd...I think a few others have guessed, like May."

"I told Bobbi," Natasha said playfully.

Clint laughed. "You did, didn't you? That was hilarious."

"You know," Cap said, "there's a Shield betting pool for how long it's going to take for you two to get caught making out. It's a fairly resilient pool as it seems to have survived the fall of Shield."

"Yeah, we know. We find it hilarious. We keep fueling the rumors. That's just wild speculation though, it doesn't really count."

"Wait, does Shield not know you're married?" Lewis asked.

"No, they don't," Clint answered. "To them we just work together. Strike Team Delta is the best there is, but they don't know we're married. They all think we're just best friends."

"Clint and Natasha are superheroes," Molly informed their guests with pride. "They fight bad guys!"

"Do they?" Tony asked dryly.

"Yeah!" Lewis said. "You are too, aren't you Mr. Rogers? You're Captain America!"

"Uh, yeah, I am."

"Of course you know who he is."

"Lewis, all these people are superheroes. Nat and I work with them."

"What?! Which one's Spider-Man?"

Tony smacked his head into the table.

"Not him," Natasha said, "but that's Iron Man, he's the Hulk, well sort of, and he's Thor, the-"

"The god of Thunder, the prince of Azgard!" Molly volunteered.

"I see you have heard of me."

"Oh him too. Does this entire family live under a rock? Hellooo! Iron Man here!"

"Mrs. Perkins told us about you in school last week."

"Did she?"

"Sure she did, but Iron Man, nooo"

"Tony shut up."

"Are you really Thor?"

"Indeed I am."

"Alright, everyone calm down and eat your food," Laura said. People generally obeyed, with grumbled complaints from Tony on some parts.

As the day progressed most of the avengers chose recreational tasks outside. The weather was nice, the air was sweet, it made sense. Cap and Tony chopped wood, making a very one-sided competition. Clint and Greg walked around the property, Greg telling Clint everything that was going on and keeping him updated on the economics of his farm and Clint trying to listen. Laura read a book and watched the kids play in the grass. As Clint and Greg came around to where the kids were playing Lewis and Molly ran up to him.

"Dad are you done yet? We want to show Mr. Barton the plane and the fort!"

Greg laughed and released Clint, who was pulled by both hands down the hill. He was presented with a wooden and tarp fort of the kids' own design apparently, and was taken on a VIP tour of the whole complex. At the end of the tour, he was assigned the position of Darth Vader and made to fight Luke and Leia.

"Hey, guys, what are you doing to him?" Cap called when he saw what Clint was being subjected to, setting down his ax and heading down the hill.

"He's Darth Vader, we have to fight him!" they protested.

"Well," Steve said, surveying the fort and Clint's nonchalant/pleading expression. "If he's Darth Vader do you know who I am?"

"No," they said.

"I'm the emperor."

"AHHHH! Run!" Steve proceeded to chase the children around the fort.

Steve got way too into the game and Clint started to leave around the time Tony volunteered to be Han Solo and little Natalie was named Yoda. Or he tried to leave. Apparently it was time for a duel.

"Are you going to join in?"

Bruce was standing on the porch watching the epic saga unfold at the bottom of the hill. The voice was Natasha's.

"I don't know if I can right now."

"Still shaken up about what happened yesterday?"

Bruce nodded. Natasha went around him to sit on the porch railing beside him.

"I'm sorry I wasn't there to stop you."

"It's not your fault. I shouldn't have-" he stopped.

"You shouldn't have what?"

"I shouldn't be here. I'm not a hero, I'm a monster. All I can do is kill. You keep me around for my destructive capacity. This, this-" he gestured to the farm and children. "This is not me. I can't have this. Peace is not, I don't facilitate peace, I can only ever have chaos and its-"

His eyes landed on her face and he stopped. She was hard and cold now. This wasn't Natasha, this was the Black Widow, or even someone else he hadn't met before.

"Bruce, I'm not a hero either. I have killed so many people, so many more than you ever have. I've shot children in cold blood. I haven't just killed people, I've tortured them. I've listened to people scream and liked it. I am a machine, I was built for war and chaos. It's the only thing I know. I can't have children, physically cannot. It's part of who the red room made me. You think you're the only monster in this team but you're not. Even the hulk is kind and compassionate if you let him be. He only hurts people to defend himself. Killing is a way of life for me. My whole world is death, inside and out. You are an amazing person, and so is the Hulk. The Hulk has no capacity to harm people that have no intention of harming him. You have no idea what I'm capable of."

Bruce was stunned. "I, I don't even know what to say, I'm sorry-"

"Don't be. And don't be scared of the kids either," she said, getting up and resuming a casual tone.

"They're good kids, they have a way with making people better. And you know what Bruce? You're really not a bad guy."

She left, closing the door behind her.

—•—•—

"You told me you were okay!" Clint said loudly when they were alone in their room that evening.

Natasha replied conversationally without looking up. "What makes you think I'm not okay?"

"Bruce told me what you told him." He didn't lower his voice.

"Did he? That doesn't seem like him." She still didn't look up.

"No, but I can guess."

"Good for you."

"Natasha!" He took her by the shoulders and made her look at him. She did so as casually as possible.

"You haven't been this bad in years. You're supposed to be over this, and I need you at the top of your game or we're all going to die!"

She finally exploded back at him. Two days of fake quiet calm and she finally explodes, which is of course exactly what he was going for. He wasn't having anymore her calm and collected facade.

"I am never going to be over it, Clint!" She stood up. "This isn't one trauma, this is my whole life! This is my very physical body that isn't ever going to be normal! Why can't you just accept that I'm never going to be okay, I can't be okay! I am a weapon that's pretending to be a person! I'm barely even human anymore!"

"You're right!" He shouted abruptly in her face. She froze.

"You are a sadistic, bloodthirsty woman." He advanced and she took a step back. There we go, now we're getting there.

"You are by anyone's definition a monster! You are perfectly meticulously manufactured weapon!"

She retreated into the bed, eyes wide.

"You're awful! You're a liar and a thief and a murderer and do you know what else you are?"

He took her by the shoulders, pushed her down, and got right in her face.

"You're mine."

Natasha's terrified expression morphed into one of alarmed confusion.

"You're the most beautiful, the strongest, and the most caring person I know. Anyone who has been through the horrible things you have and still has any capacity to love is amazing, and you love more that anyone I know. You were programmed and built for war and chaos and fear and yet you love, you defend, and you pacify. You work to be better. You are strong, you keep fighting, and you don't loose yourself. You're incredible, Tasha."

There were tears in her eyes. She still hadn't moved.

"I don't expect you to be perfectly at ease with your past, but I have the privilege of expecting you to be stronger than it, and I have the honor of being the person who can help you through it."

He pressed his forehead to hers.

"So please, please, don't tell me you're okay when you aren't. Let me help you."

She was crying now, which was exactly what Clint was going for. He sat up and held his arms out.

"Come here, you. See, you're still human, I can make you cry."

"I hate you," she mumbled as she crawled over to him and let him hide her in his arms.

"No you don't," he whispered into her hair.

She cried.

"You wanna go spar?" he said after a few minutes.

She opened her eyes.

"Race you to the pasture." She sprung out of bed and sprinted through the building, with him right on her heels.