Chapter 3 – "Start counting, Malfoy."
Draco had been awake for what felt like an hour. His eyes were half lidded and he took a deep, content breath before closing his eyes yet again. He could've just as well been in a very nice dream, he felt so relaxed and good right now.
Everything was good. All of his plans had pretty much worked out perfectly. He had known they would but there was always room for self-doubt.
He was hard, had been since he woke up and it was alright too. He felt mostly relieved. He couldn't remember if he'd been hard even once during the sixth year in school. He wasn't sure if he had been hard even once during the war. He felt like he hadn't been and had thought there might be something seriously wrong with him.
Back in those days it was the constant stress that had been locking him up, creating blocks and walls inside him, making him stay inside his own thoughts and hide far away from people. He had lost all contact with his body because the stress had overridden everything. That time he was hungry and tired but couldn't really do anything about it since it felt like too much work even thinking about anything other than "I need to find a way, he'll kill me if I don't".
The stress had stopped everything in his life. It had created elaborate locks inside him which Draco couldn't open later on. He'd stayed locked inside his own head for a long time.
Now the stress was once again over and he felt better than he remembered feeling in years. He'd be happy to be hard for weeks if that was what his cock chose to do. He was so relieved.
Potter's fingers suddenly pressed Draco's skin a little more firmly on Draco's hip.
Draco bit his lower lip a bit, thinking, don't wake up now, keep sleeping…
Luckily Potter didn't, and kept breathing evenly against Draco's neck.
Now, that was the reason why Draco had been hard since he had woken up. Potter had apparently already during the first night developed a habit of sleeping against Draco's back, and sometimes in his sleep wrapped arms, hands, legs and fingers somewhere on Draco's body.
At first Draco found it all hilarious, thinking how embarrassed Potter would be waking up, having had his hard-on firmly pushed against Draco's butt. Like he had been yesterday.
Hah!
It was still funny on some level but at the same time it wasn't fun at all. He knew he shouldn't be around Potter at all because Potter had this miraculous way of messing up Draco's rational thoughts.
Right at this moment Draco felt like he could stay right here forever. And that wasn't normal! Potter had somehow made him feel this way and it wasn't supposed to go like this. Draco didn't approve.
Everything about Potter made him react somehow, even the smallest little details, like Potter's fingers that were now on Draco's hip.
Draco looked at the fingers and all he could think about was something so irrational he hated himself a little for thinking about it and not being able to stop.
He wanted to grab Potter's hand, suck his fingers in a manner that left no guesses on what other places Draco wanted to suck.
Better yet, he wanted to grab Potter's hand and wrap those fingers around his cock because he was so hard he'd probably cum at the very same moment Potter touched him.
It wasn't fair Potter was such a cocktease – why was Potter touching him all the time while he was asleep.
Occasionally he felt like shouting to Potter, "If you have to keep rubbing against me while you're unconscious then would you please carry it on until the end. Yes, that's right, Potter! I'm a boy and there's two places where you can stick your – "
That was nothing though. That was nothing compared to the bigger problem Potter had created.
The problem Potter had created for Draco was far too big to even analyse since it was so big Draco didn't know where the limits with it were. The problem affected everything.
Potter had done something totally unforgivable to Draco one night. Potter had looked adorable.
Yes, Draco had not used that specific word in such a long time he didn't know he still knew what it meant but that night there were absolutely no other words to describe what had happened.
First Potter had wrapped those fingers around the snitch and then given the small, content smile.
It was like a lightning had struck him. Draco's whole life had changed at that specific moment. He'd known it at once. Everything had changed. Draco could never ever get back to what he had felt for Potter before that exact moment.
Instead it felt like Potter had suddenly reached his fingers, pushed them through Draco's skin and wrapped them somewhere inside Draco, possibly right around Draco's innermost core.
Draco had been sitting there, beside the sleeping Gryffindor for at least an hour, just staring and feeling hurt by the fact Potter had the snitch in his fist, and not for example Draco's hand or any other Draco's body part which he gladly would've given if Potter had asked so.
Draco would've gladly been transformed into that snitch and just stayed there.
When he finally had made himself leave the room, he had felt it all the way back to Slytherin dormitory. A piece of him was missing.
Potter had that piece.
Potter had stolen it without even knowing it and Draco would never feel the same again.
He would always feel that empty hole and he would feel pain every time he saw Potter.
He had gotten evidence about how big the problem was when on Friday Potter had entered that damned cupboard with the White Devil.
Draco had never felt such jealousy before. He had wanted to stand up, shout and kill someone, first Dene and maybe even Potter because the pain inside Draco's chest was so unbearable. He still wondered how on earth he had managed to stay so calm. He hadn't used any unforgivables.
Potter had ruined Draco's life.
It was unbearable. That's why Draco wouldn't kiss Potter. He wouldn't take the risk of Potter stealing more from Draco. Who knew what might happen to Draco if Potter kissed him.
Even when Potter had been wrapping his arms around Draco in the kitchen, all Draco could think was; I want to make a spell around us, one that will keep you attached to me forever so you can never walk around carrying a part of me with you and leaving me feel empty…
When Potter had pulled away the pain was suddenly there again and then he'd become jealous all over again.
Yet right now when Potter was asleep, breathing peacefully on Draco's neck and occasionally touching Draco it felt alright, the pain seized.
He wished he could hurt Potter by putting him under some sleeping draughts or whatever that would keep Potter right there but that was part of the problem too, he knew he was unarmed when it came to Potter – there was no way he could even think of hurting Potter.
He'd felt horrible when he'd hit Potter with the binding spell. But it had been a spontaneous reaction to both the jealousy and the fear Potter might kiss him and steal another piece of him.
Besides Draco was quite often thinking about binding Potter – with the exception he wanted to bind Potter to himself.
It was a feeling of fear, what Draco felt when Potter was awake. Potter might break him into pieces.
Potter stirred in his sleep again and Draco felt the fear and disappointment stir inside him before realising Potter still didn't wake up. Oh, and the Gryffindor was hard. Nice.
When Potter had yesterday said something like 'why does it matter it's you and me' Draco wasn't really sure what Potter had been talking about. It sounded like Potter was talking about sex. Maybe he was.
See, there would be no reason he couldn't have sex with Potter – except the one and only same reason why he couldn't even kiss him. Draco wouldn't take the risk of… etc.
Still it felt nice Potter was hard because of him. That made Draco sigh and smile.
Potter stirred again and Draco could hear how his breathing changed just before he pulled his hand away from Draco's hip and backed away from Draco a little bit. Draco closed his eyes and bit his lower lip in disappointment.
Potter was awake, and he would hear from Draco's breathing he was awake too. At least Potter didn't jump up or apologize like the last time.
"You're awake," Potter muttered.
"Mmm…" Draco confirmed.
"How long was I asleep?" Potter asked sounding confused.
"A long time but I should probably tell you something. It's easier if you don't think about time while we're in here. The non-time thing is one of the most complicated things in wizardry and some people who stay in cupboards like these end up in St. Mungo's once they get out."
"Why's that?" Potter asked, Draco could still feel Potter's breath faintly in his neck and knew the boy had stayed near; although had made sure none part of his body touched Draco's (which was a shame).
"Well… we get the feeling the time is going by and feel like we've spent days, possibly weeks or years in here and when we go out we realize we've forgotten what happened just before we left and we get confused when we talk to people as we can't recall what we discussed last time and… well… believe me, it's very confusing. I was quite shocked when I spent what felt like weeks in here and then returned to the same day from which I left. It's quite easy to forget the details. Then people just think you've gone nuts when you suddenly don't know the things they think you did that very same day. Try it, try to think of what you did for example exactly three weeks ago on Tuesday? What did you eat for dinner?"
Potter made a thinking sound and then muttered: "Uhm… I have no idea what I had for dinner that day. Actually I can't remember too much about that specific Tuesday but I can come up with something if I think about the other days of that week, trying to figure out what happened on which day… sort of…"
When Potter didn't say anything more, Draco said,
"Yeah, I know. I was going to suggest you should write everything down about the Sunday when we came here.
Every little detail you can remember, maybe even the couple of days before that. And in the meanwhile it's easiest if you don't think about anything relating to time.
You eat when you're hungry, you sleep when you're tired and that's it. Don't think of this moment as a morning since it's not. I like to think everything like it's still Sunday, and this Sunday just happens to feel really long, and we just had a nap or something… that's the easiest thinking pattern for me, I think."
Potter sighed, "Okay. It's all extremely confusing."
"I know, that's why these cupboards are so rare. People more often go crazy and don't get any real advantage of them." Draco said.
They were silent for a moment before Potter asked, "Do you think I still have fever?"
Draco turned around. Why did Potter have to look so cute without the glasses? Maybe Draco could hide them and not give them back at all…
The green eyes were staring at him as he put his hand on Potter's forehead.
Then Draco muttered, "No, you don't. I actually checked twice already while you were sleeping."
Potter swallowed; damn it was too dark to see if he was blushing as well, "You did?"
"Yeah, I have potions for that. I had to check if it gets worse and I should get you one…" Draco replied.
Potter's eyes looked green even in his semi-darkness which Draco actually liked. It sort of softened everything with Potter.
Everything felt a little less real and more acceptable when the light was dim.
Draco also happened to like green a lot.
"I hate saying this but I'm hungry," Potter muttered.
"Yeah? You should go and eat then," Draco answered.
"You should eat too," Potter said, the green eyes suddenly seemed more intense, he was staring right into Draco's eyes and biting his lower lip; then his eyes moved into Draco's lips and then back into the waiting grey eyes.
Oh no, he's thinking about kissing me, please no, don't you dare to do this to me!
"Your spine stands out, you know," Potter muttered.
Draco's heartbeats were quickening, his breathing became more rapid,
"Have you been touching me while I've been asleep?" Draco's voice sounded unnaturally quiet, almost like a whisper. Don't do this to me, please just don't, I want you.
"Accidentally, yeah," Potter's voice was low.
Draco's breathing became erratic as he constantly either forgot to take a breath or forgot to breathe it out. Please just tie me up and fuck me.
Potter reached out his hand and touched Draco's neck, wrapped fingers slowly on Draco's hair and pulled him a little closer. Draco closed his eyes and tried hard to ignore the urge to give in and kiss Potter.
No, no, no, no, you cannot do this to me, you'll tear me apart, I will not become your little plaything, I will not accept this, please don't…
Potter reached out his other hand too and stroke Draco's chin and cheek and I can't fight back, I give in…Potter pulled Draco's head closer until finally he could close the distance with his lips.
It felt better than he remembered, Potter was being exceptionally gentle, not pushy and not trying to smother Draco at all.
I like this too much, I have to stop this, otherwise I'll fall apart, I know I will.
He placed his hand on Potter's chest and tried to push the boy away gently but Potter's fingers in his hair tightened their grip and Draco released a small moan before pulling back and ripping his lips away from Potters,
"Please. Don't," He managed to breathe out, he was breathless.
Potter dropped his hands down and Draco suffered at the loss but forced himself to look Potter in the eyes and say, "I can't, I just can't. Just don't."
There was vulnerability, hurt at the rejection, embarrassment and maybe hint of anger too in the green eyes. Those feelings were a bit too much for Draco to see and he managed to pull himself away and then get up and leave the room.
He was a coward. He was running away, not just from Potter's feelings but from his own too, and form the whole situation.
He hid in the kitchen and started cooking using cooking spells and keeping himself so focused on it as he could, trying to distract himself from thinking. He leaned on the counter for support and sighed.
It hurts, he hurts me, why does he have to do that, why do I have to hurt this bad because of him, it's not fair.
He set up the plates and glasses for two although he was certain Potter would be too angry to eat together with him.
He sighed, sat down and crossed his arms on the table before letting his head drop against them.
I should let him leave; I should kiss him for ten minutes, grant him his freedom and stay here for the rest of my life.
I don't want to go back to real world ever. Especially not after this.
I would have to see him every day from distance and maybe he'd find someone.
What if Potter started going out with someone? No, that would be too unbearable.
He wanted to have Potter. He wanted to have power over him, wanted to tie him down and decide everything for him.
Right now he sort of did. He had Potter here; and he had the Cupboard under his commands.
Potter was in his world, in his prison he had made for Potter.
Potter was even wearing his clothes.
If he only could hurt Potter, then he would… he would… he would poison him, keep him ill, make him dependent on Draco.
But he couldn't.
Potter would destroy him.
Potter would tear him into small pieces soon.
He was so exhausted. Potter was probably furious at him, and that felt awful too.
He felt like crying all of a sudden but wouldn't.
He stood up and went to look for Potter. He cautiously peeked into the bedroom as if he was spying on the Gryffindor. Potter was sitting by the desk writing something furiously.
He stood there for a moment before forcing himself to step out behind the wall and said,
"I'm… "
Potter stopped writing but didn't turn to look at Draco.
He was angry; Draco could tell it from the tense pose, the way Potter's shoulders were rigid.
Draco swallowed; he'll kill me, "I'm sorry. I… there's food in the kitchen."
Potter didn't move an inch but he suddenly said, "You're sorry? How about you give me an explanation instead?"
What? No! I don't have an explanation! I can't tell you, you have a part of me and you'll destroy me if I so much as touch you!
"I'm sorry. I am. I can't give you an explanation." Draco said, he felt drained with the constant fighting with himself. All he really wanted to do was to be near the Gryffindor and he couldn't so what else could he do but to try to fight back the emotions, they would go away eventually, they would have to.
Potter stood up and turned to Draco, his eyes were bright behind the glasses. Merlin, he's angry, I knew he would kill me…
"What the hell is this, Malfoy? What are you playing at? One minute I'm certain you want me and the next I'm embarrassed because I even thought so! Spit it out, what is this?"
Potter's voice was loud and angry, his fists were clenched.
Draco felt like running away and tried to, turning to leave he muttered, "I'm sorry, I can't…"
Before Draco had taken more than two steps towards the kitchen, Potter caught him and grabbed his arm painfully hard, "Ow, get off me!" He shouted out of instinct.
"Is it because of him?" Potter shouted over his voice.
"What?" Draco was confused and frowned.
Potter's jaw was clenched and his green eyes were flaming,
"Is it him? Do you love him?"
"What are you talking about?" Was Potter talking about Dene?
"I saw the way you looked at us when we came out of the cupboard on Friday! You were jealous! Weren't you? I know you were so don't deny it!" Potter was shaking with rage, it was quite scary.
"I don't love him!" Draco shouted, he was not going to listen to this crap, and he would not tell Potter he'd been jealous of him and not of anyone else.
"I saw your face, Malfoy! I've never seen you like that! That wasn't just pretending, was it? You have feelings for him!" Potter was glaring at him; the green eyes were trying to drill a hole through Draco's eyes.
He would not (!) tell Potter who he was jealous of, no, and that thought made him sneer,
"Why? Are you jealous of him yourself?"
All of a sudden Potter launched himself on Draco, making them both fall down on the floor.
Before he even knew it, Potter had managed to pin his both hands on top of his head and Potter's knees were painfully pressing his thighs against the floor.
Then Potter growled in anger, "I'm out of here! Start counting, Malfoy!"
Potter pressed his lips on Draco's, who released a whimper of surprise and panic.
No, don't do this to me, no. Potter's lips were too soft and warm.
Potter was too rough, his fingers had pressed deep in Draco's skin in his wrists and he moaned because he was helpless.
Potter was desperate to get out of the cupboard; he felt the desperation in the smothering way Potter kissed him.
I know I'm being selfish; I should let you go if that's what you want.
I know I shouldn't try to control you so go ahead, do what you want to, leave me, and break me.
He relaxed and took a deep breath though his nose, he barely answered to the kiss, waiting for Potter to calm down, which the boy did.
Now it wasn't smothering anymore, now it was better and calmer.
Draco released a small, defeated moan. It clearly said enough because Potter made the kiss gentler.
Draco moved his hands a bit and Potter relented, letting Draco pull his hands free.
If you're going to leave me then I swear on Merlin's name I'll make this the best kiss you've ever had and you'll never be able to kiss anyone without thinking about me.
Draco sucked Potter's tongue, gently, then a little harder and moaned.
He tried to move his legs a little and Potter relented with that too, suddenly he moved enough to get between Draco's thighs which he in return spread, thinking, Yes, come to me.
Draco wrapped his arms gently around Potter, waiting for the Gryffindor to fight back but he didn't so Draco put his finger's on Potter's hair. He stroked Potter's neck and eventually had the courage to let his fingers touch Potter's forehead before he tried to get the glasses off.
It wasn't too easy; he managed to get his own knuckle in his eye before finally got the glasses off and threw them carelessly somewhere far away.
I hope he doesn't find them, I'll hide them, I won't let him go…
He gave himself a permission to wrap his legs around Potter since this would surely be the last time ever so it didn't matter. Potter would break him and Draco would let him do that.
Ah! Potter was hard! Yes, yes, yes! I know I'm too but it's nice that you are.
He moaned in pleasure and knew his lips were turning into a smile even if Potter's lips were currently kissing them, trying not to let Draco smile.
Draco let his hands roam around Potter's chest and back before they ended up on Potter's ass. He thrust against Potter, slowly, giving himself permission to feel the emotions which were building up inside him.
Potter put his other arm under and around Draco's neck, both to keep him in place and to get enough support to hold himself in a good position.
Potter moaned.
Yes, now I know, I'll make you come so hard you can't even remember who you are if you think of leaving me…
He pushed his hand between them and inside Potter's (his own) green, silk pants and found Potter's leaking cock. No need to take his pants of, the fabric is ruined already.
Potter moaned again but suddenly grabbed Draco's hand; pulled it away before stuffing his own hand in Draco's pants and wrapping his fingers around Draco's cock.
Draco moaned louder than Potter.
It feels too good; I'll come in seconds if you don't stop that…
Draco's breathing went rapid and he sucked Potter's tongue. He let Potter rub him, I like that, I like that a lot, and he moaned again, stroking Potter's ass gently.
The fabric did feel nice; it allowed Draco to feel everything underneath it. That turned him on more than he wished for. Potter's touch felt so good, it forced Draco to give in completely.
Draco's thoughts were hazy, he knew his brain always shut down and went into a hazy mode whenever he was coming - and before that, and also after.
Irrational little thoughts like fuck me, fuck me spinning around and letting him float in the feelings, far away from anything resembling reality.
His heartbeats were so loud they were drumming inside his ears and he could barely hear his own moans as he made the decision of letting himself go and enjoy it.
Do it to me, I'm yours, I'm all yours forever and forever…It felt so good, he felt the orgasm build up inside him, growing bigger and bigger. He knew it would be extraordinary powerful and feared he might pass out when it'd finally hit him.
He was moaning like he couldn't stop, his fingers were clutching Potter's arse.
I can't let you go…
He did it, he turned his head so violently the kiss broke at the exact same time he was arching and holding his breath as the orgasm hit him with such force he saw stars falling, spinning behind his closed eyelids.
His face was pretty much buried now in Potter's arm which was still around Draco's neck, he was panting, inhaling Potter's scent with every breath.
I'm so yours.
He was shaking and he didn't let go of Potter's ass, only let his other arm drop to the floor as he was breathless and exhausted.
The hazy afterglow thoughts were filling his mind immediately. They made him want to say stupid things he knew would make sense only to himself right now and which bore no contact with reality. He had to bite his lower lip to keep his mouth shut.
All he wanted to do was to tell Potter he needed him, wanted him, wanted to fuck him, wanted to be fucked by him and all that… he wanted to cum inside him and…
"What are you thinking?" Potter asked sounding breathless. Draco forced himself to turn his head a little and open his eyes just enough to see Potter's green ones near him,
"Hazy afterglow thoughts," he muttered, still breathless.
"Hazy? I feel hazy too…" Potter said, his voice did sound hazy and soft, a voice which told Draco the boy had just had sex, I like that, I really don't want this to stop, I honestly don't…
Draco didn't say anything, but watched Potter's eyes, which looked better now than ever before.
I feel so warm and good, I hope we didn't get to ten minutes; I counted on the fact we didn't.
"Want to share any of them?" Potter asked and his lips formed a little smile, almost the same one Draco had seen that one night when Potter had the snitch. Draco liked that smile.
His voice was so gentle too, just like the smile – so gentle it almost hurt, and made Draco remember for a short moment the fact that Potter might leave the cupboard and that would definitely break Draco into pieces. He would miss that smile always. I love you.
"I could but they don't make any sense to you, they're… you know… crazy afterglow thoughts you'd never think about in any other situation… ever."
He felt still exhausted, and so warm he might fall asleep right here, watching Potter's green eyes.
"It doesn't matter if they don't make sense, I'd like to hear one," Potter coaxed him.
Draco thought about it, his mouth felt like talking, he felt like telling Potter everything he was thinking of and it was getting too tiresome to be constantly fighting back with something, especially now when Potter was so gentle, warm and close.
"Will you promise you won't laugh?" Draco asked.
"Of course." Potter smiled.
"And then you're going to tell me all of your hazy thoughts after I've sucked you off?"
Draco smiled with a twinkle in his eyes, he enjoyed the sight of Potter's face as the Gryffindor's smile froze and Potter's arm under Draco's neck became tense.
"Uhm…" Potter hesitated, but Draco knew what he wanted so it didn't matter if Potter hesitated, "Say yes, Potter," he pressed his lips on Potter's neck, sucked the skin and Potter's fingers were in Draco's hair, clutching them,
"Yeah, tell me your thought first," Potter muttered, his voice sounded… hazy.
Draco talked right into Potter's ear, letting his voice drop as low and seductive as he could, while stroking Potter's neck,
"I was thinking I want you to fuck me and come inside me so many times my body fills up with it, your seed gets into my blood stream and goes all the way up to my brain so all I see is white and the saliva in my mouth tastes like you."
He looked at Potter's expression which was a bit shocked but also soft, hazy with lust. Potter was too dumbfounded to say anything, Draco pushed Potter's chest gently and the boy lay down on the floor. Draco climbed on top of him and started to open the buttons of Potter's (his) green silk shirt to get his lips on the skin, finally getting to lick and suck it.
Yes, he liked the way Potter's skin felt on his tongue. There really wasn't anything he didn't like about Potter's body.
Potter's fingers felt good in his hair and neck. Draco pulled Potter's pants away completely and smiled a little at the notion he still had his clothes on and Potter was naked. He felt even more powerful now.
He smiled at Potter mischievously, thinking and now I get to make him cum so hard he doesn't know where or who he is, yes.
He kissed Potter's stomach and licked a trail further down before he finally got to his cock. I know I'm naturally good at this, I know I am… Draco thought and took the head of the cock in his mouth and sucked it. Potter's fingers were clutching his hair more tightly, yes, he likes this.
Potter moaned as Draco sucked more and more.
Merlin, I could swallow you, Draco thought and tried exactly that, he moaned as Potter gently tried to push himself down Draco's throat.
That made Draco even more aroused. He let Potter do that because the boy liked it, although it was a bit painful since it was hard to breath, try not to gag and fight back the tears that were forming in his eyes as he fought back with the gagging.
Potter moaned and muttered something incomprehensible nonsense.
Yeah, I know you love this, Draco thought and again tried to swallow Potter deeper and deeper and he felt like Potter was fucking his mouth. Let him do that, he thought, and sucked more firmly, wanting to rip the orgasm from the boy with force.
He was surprised how little time it took before Potter was furiously writhing and clutching Draco's hair so hard it almost hurt while he was pushing his cock down Draco's throat.
Draco could feel it, feel it in the movements and Potter's breathing, it was like Potter's body told him he was coming already before Potter said it aloud and moaned loudly.
Draco swallowed it, although he had to force himself to do it, it wasn't a piece of cake but he would get used to that if he ever got more practice.
This time he had wanted to swallow only because of one reason.
And it was because he wanted something from Potter inside him too, because Potter had a part of him. It was ridiculous he told himself, he was childish thinking about something like that but what could he do – he wanted Potter!
He wanted to rip Potter into pieces and keep some of the parts to himself so Potter would hurt without him too.
He kept licking and sucking Potter's spent cock, he really didn't want to stop everything now.
"Draco," Potter called him softly and Draco lifted his face up, licking the cum on his lips,
"Mmm?"
Potter looked a little worried, there was a small frown on his forehead which Draco wasn't sure was because of pleasure or worry.
Potter stroked his neck gently, Potter's gingers felt so soft and warm and Draco closed his eyes for a moment, when Potter spoke,
"Did Dene ever call you a dragon?"
Draco opened his eyes and looked in the green ones, "He might've. Why?"
"Do other people call you Dragon too?" Potter frowned some more.
Draco shrugged a little, "Sometimes, yeah, especially if I'm angry. Zabini once made a spell on me so for one week every time I was furious there was smoke coming out of my nose, it wasn't funny. Why do you ask?"
Draco wasn't sure but he couldn't remember Potter ever calling him Draco before, not like that at least. It felt good but now he was a bit worried because Potter looked worried.
"Come here," Potter muttered and Draco did climb up the Gryffindor body until he reached his face and looked into the green eyes, "What's wrong?"
Potter took a deep breath.
He's going to leave, I know he will, why would he otherwise look so worried and... hurt…"Draco, my patronus had turned into a dragon," Potter said and he almost looked like he could start crying.
Draco relaxed on top the boy and put his fingers on Potter's warm, soft neck,
"Why would one's patronus change its form?" Draco asked and watched his fingers on Potter's skin; he drew small patterns with his index finger.
"It sometimes does when someone's in love…" Potter said and Draco's finger stopped drawing the pattern. Draco held his breath before looking into Potter's eyes and asking,
"What?" His voice betrayed him, he sounded panicked.
"I think that… I've fallen in love with you," Potter said and then clenched his jaw, his chest heaved under Draco as he took a deep breath. Yes, Potter was surely fighting back from crying.
Draco put his index finger on Potter's forehead and ran it on the lightning scar, up and down and muttered,
"That's your after orgasm hazy thoughts, don't worry, the feeling will go away."
Potter shook his head and Draco had to pull his fingers away from the forehead,
"No, Draco. I was wondering earlier what my feelings were but I know for a certain fact now. I love you."
Draco looked at Potter's neck, he was too afraid to look Potter in the eyes.
"What does that mean exactly?" He asked.
When Draco looked at Potter's face again, Potter had closed his eyes and was breathing quietly, he said, "I don't know, I've never been in love like this."
Draco sighed and asked, "Yes, but how does it make you feel?"
Potter took another deep breath before answering, "Vulnerable, naked… maybe scared."
Draco lifted his eyebrows a little, "Scared? What are you scared of?"
Potter swallowed and clenched his jaw before saying,
"Uhm… a lot of things, I think. That… now that I told you, you might use it against me. You might hurt me on purpose. Maybe you might even break my heart because you have the chance to do that. I'm afraid because I have no idea what you think of all this and I have no idea what's been going on between us. And uhm… I'm afraid that you don't like me, and you don't want to be with me. I think that I'd go crazy if you were with someone else. I want to be with you and that's not going to change, even if you don't want to be with me."
Draco was holding his breath. There was something in Potter's words and tone which made Draco feel vulnerable, naked and scared too. I almost sounded like… no, it couldn't be… it almost sounded like Potter was feeling something similar what Draco felt. It was scary.
Draco wanted to tell Potter he would never hurt him but he couldn't speak. Instead he felt like kissing Potter so he did. He stroked Potter's cheek and kissed him very gently. He licked his lips and pressed his tongue in Potter's mouth.
He broke the kiss just enough to murmur into Potter's lips, "Does that mean you might fuck me sometime?"
Potter smiled a little, "Definitely, if that's what you want."
Draco kissed him again before murmuring, "I'd like that a lot."
After another kiss he asked, "Does that mean I can get a part of you and get to keep it?"
Potter's fingers seemed to be all over Draco's face and neck, "You already do."
"Yeah? Which part is that?" Draco muttered and kissed him again.
"My heart, of course," Potter whispered.
Draco smiled into Potter's lips, kissed him and said, "I'll accept that."
Potter muttered something which sounded like 'fuck me'.
Draco moaned and admitted it to himself; he was in love with Harry Potter.