Hermione awoke the following morning back in the Gryffindor dormitory and hurriedly changed before dashing down to the abandoned bathroom to take another dose of Polyjuice potion. Once she was changed she threw on her Slytherin cloak to help fight the nip in the air and made her way to the great hall for breakfast.
She had hoped to beat Draco there so she could eat alone before he arrived but found him already sat at the unpopulated Slytherin table mulling over a piece of jam toast whilst peering at the pages of the Daily Prophet. He looked up as she reluctantly approached him. He then turned his cheek towards her and she stared at it as if it was some curious oddity. "Morning." He said expectantly once again offering the side of his face.
He surely wasn't expecting me to kiss him was he? She fretted to herself as she opted for brushing his face with the back of her hand instead. She tried to be tender but probably looked more like she was wiping off a smudge of jam. He frowned at her as she took her seat next to him and busied herself with pouring herself a bowl of cornflakes.
"What's gotten into you?" He asked but didn't wait for an answer as he handed her the morning paper. She took it and skimmed the first few pages.
"No word on Voldemort?" She pointed out trying to sound put out but secretly feeling relieved.
"Hmm." He wasn't paying attention but took his empty glass and shook it in her general direction.
"Yes?" She asked looking at him with a raised eyebrow.
"Pumpkin Juice." He replied nodding towards the full pitcher merely an arms length to his left.
"Well it won't pour itself Draco dear." She explained nonchalantly flicking through the paper.
"But-"
"Draco I'm busy." She motioned to the newspaper in her hand fighting the urge to whack him over the head with it.
"Oh." He merely frowned again and poured himself a glass. When he was finished Hermione grabbed her glass and held it out to him. He reluctantly poured her a glass with a displeased sigh.
Hermione tried to resist but let out a snort of laughter before quickly rectifying her poise, casting her eyes away from the paper. To her surprise Draco had an amused smile on his face as he put down the pitcher, it was brief but it was defiantly there and it wasn't the normal smirk or vile crescent he used when he was pleased with his spiteful insults, it was different, subtle and without the venom in his silvery grey eyes... Pleasant. Hermione shuddered at the thought and took her attention back to her breakfast.
"Where does he get off?" Draco sneered leaning on his elbow and staring daggers across the hall.
Hermione peered up in the same direction and spotted Dean Thomas sitting at the Gryffindor table deep in what looked like a rather intimate conversation with Cho Chang. He was busy telling her something which she appeared to find rather funny, he was casually placing his hand on hers as she laughed.
"What?" Hermione knew full well Draco didn't like Dean, he had made it clear on numerous occasions that he didn't think Dean belonged at this school just as much as herself and prepared for the onslaught of crude insults and snide comments, the little snake.
"Well hasn't he just broken up with the Weasley girl?" He frowned pointing his fork at Dean's back. "I mean like two days ago?"
Hermione stared at him blankly. "How do you know?"
"Everyone does. They decided to hold their tiresome little argument in front of everyone at dinner didn't they?"
"So what, we don't care right?" Hermione didn't want to hear him bad mouth her friends and tried to direct the conversation away from them.
"Well I don't know. I just think it shows little class to be slobbering over someone else the same week he's split up with Ginny. Especially the day after she leaves the school."
Hermione raised her eyebrows. She wasn't expecting this. She looked over at Dean observing him and Cho for a second. He'd seemed inconsolable the night he broke up with Ginny. Despite the row it did appear that Dean was very much still keen to make it work and here he was the moment Ginny had left the castle very obviously flirting with Cho. Was Draco right? Did this have nothing to do with Draco's hatred for him? Was he actually in fact thinking about someone else's feelings? Ginny? Someone Hermione knew full well he didn't particularly like.
"I... I suppose so." She conceded. She didn't consider it anyone's business what Dean decided to do now that he and Ginny were apart but it did seem to Hermione at least as a little cheap.
"I mean how would you like it if I started carrying on like that if we split up? The next day no less." Draco leaned on his hand and stared at Hermione.
"Well... I... I suppose I'd be heartbroken." If Harry and Ron had been sat at the table this very moment they would have had to have been carried out the hall on stretchers in fits of laughter.
"Exactly." Draco nodded pridefully. "A little dignity is far more attractive in the long run."
Hermione couldn't stop herself from smiling. This was so surreal. Draco Malfoy not only being right but actually making his point with a fair degree of charm.
"Doesn't surprise me though, a dirty little Mudblood like that wouldn't know the first thing about dignity."
Hermione's smile crashed towards her chin. She gritted her teeth and snapped her focus back to the Prophet. "And there it is." She muttered to herself.
"There's what?"
Hermione sighed and folded up the newspaper. "Nothing. So what's the plan for today?" She asked trying to sound casual but inside still seething from feeling so crestfallen.
"I'm busy." He didn't embellish but by the tone of his voice Hermione could tell it had something to do with the work he mentioned the day before.
"Well surely I could be of some help, if you'd just let me-"
"I don't need your help." He snapped fixing her with a terse stare.
"Fine!" Hermione barked back slamming her cup down onto the table. "I just wanted to spend some more time with you. Shall I arrange our meetings in a diary so that I can clear them with you beforehand. 5:00pm dinner together, 7:00pm a short walk in the greenhouse, 9:00pm rubbing your smelly old feet." She glared at Malfoy shoving her hands across her chest and turning to face the hall door.
Malfoy burst out laughing, prompting even a put out Hermione to turn back. "Rub my feet? What are we, an old married couple in the 50's?"
"Well..." Hermione smirked and pointed at him accusingly. "There no need to be such a git all the time."
"Where's this all coming from?" He asked smiling.
"All what?"
"You're just so different at the moment."
"Well sorry for giving you a taste of what you dish out on a daily basis."
"Don't be." Draco grabbed his scarf from the table and made to get up. "Look how about we meet up in the Library after dinner? Might as well get the holiday homework done now I suppose. Not that it'll matter much." He mumbled the last part to himself, his drained, tired eyes staring absentmindedly out the hall windows.
"Ok." Hermione watched him for a minute. Draco hated her and she hated him but even she of all people couldn't fail but notice he was carrying something heavy inside him. What if Harry was right? What if Voldemort had given him some task to do? It's not as if he could say no even if he wanted to. Hermione imagined herself in the same situation and felt a heavy feeling in the pit of her stomach. It didn't bare thinking about. Sure she'd rather die than help someone as vile and cruel as Voldemort but nothing was ever that simple. "What's wrong?" She asked sitting up straight and peering into his face.
Draco turned his face slowly towards her and said nothing for a long time. He gave her a searching look and opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out. He shook his head and turned away from the table. "It's nothing." He walked away from her wrapping his scarf round his neck and pulling his robe tightly round him.
Hermione spent a blissful morning and afternoon as herself and enjoyed the freedom of the castle. So much so that she arrived at the school library rather later than she'd planned and clattered through the door, kicking up the dust on the shelves as it slammed into them. She searched the tables by the window and spotted Draco sat at the furthest one. He was perched on the edge of his chair looking out the window. He chewed on the end of the quill in his hand but all the books in front of him had yet to be opened. His brow was furrowed as he picked at the rip on the front of his satchel. Actually his whole appearance was rather untidy. For someone who always carried himself with an arrogant pride it was strange to see Malfoy as he was now. His blonde hair hung messily over his face, the bags under his eyes were deeper and the collar of his shirt skewed. His nails looked slightly ragged as if he had been biting them and the sleeves on his shirt were crumpled and creased as if they'd been rolled up recently.
She weaved her way over to him and dumped her bag onto the table. Draco blinked hard and looked up taking a moment to register he was no longer alone.
"You're late." He reprimanded throwing her a terse look.
"I know, I know. I'm sorry." She sat down opposite him and pulled out her workbook for Defence.
"All this whining about wanting to spend time together and you can't even be bothered to show up on time." Draco scowled and leaned back in his chair his face ripe with displeasure.
"I'm only a little bit late, I wasn't even sure you deemed it worth your while to honour me with your presence. What's got you so moody this time?"
"Forget it." He turned his face away from her and went back to looking out into the grounds below the window. Hermione looked at him properly for the first time since sitting down. He wasn't angry, he was tense. He fiddled with the quill in his hands and didn't seem to realise he was blotting ink all over his half finished homework. Hermione was so used to his usual scowl or look of contempt that insecurity really stuck like a sore thumb on him. She sighed and pushed her books to one side.
"Look, I'm sorry I was late Draco. Really I am. How about we go up to the top of the tower..." She leaned forward placing her hands on the table in front of her, smiling suggestively. "And you can push me over the battlements, or maybe we could feed me to the Snargaluff plants in the greenhouse?"
Draco chuckled and shook his head. He leaned forward and smiled at Hermione. Once again Hermione was taken back by how different Malfoy looked when he wasn't being... Well Malfoy.
"You certainly know the way to a man's heart." He lightly rubbed his temple with his fingers, he was clearly nursing a headache. "So how was your afternoon?" He asked leaning on his chin.
"Not bad." She replied pulling out her quill and ink pot. "I managed to get most of Snape's essay on counter curses done over dinner." She chirped happily, then realising she might be sounding a bit too like Hermione grimaced and pretended to look exhausted.
"You are joking right? I don't think you've ever completed a piece of homework without asking for my help." Draco eyed her suspiciously.
"Well err- I was on a roll so I worked right through dinner. It's probably not right." It was right, she knew it but now was not the time to boast.
"Still it was a long essay. I'm used to you rushing everything on the last day of break. Why'd you think I suggested meeting up here? I'm surprised you were that keen to be honest."
Hermione understood this, she was always nagging Harry and Ron to get an early start on holiday homework. It was strange to think Draco did the same.
"Mind if I take a look?" He asked holding out his hand.
"Well it's probably not worth reading I mean it's me we're talking about after all." She shifted her gaze nervously to her rolled up parchment.
"Still, this is why we're here after all." He reasoned.
Hermione reluctantly handed over her work and sat studying Draco's face as he read. After a few surprised eyebrow raises and the odd nod he rolled it back up and looked sceptically at her.
"It's good... really good. In fact... It's too good." He leaned forward and stared hard at her.
"What do you mean too good? The cheek. I just worked hard." Hermione argued looking rather perturbed.
"Don't give me that Pansy. I know you. There is no way you did this. There's stuff here that goes way off textbook. This is proper research. You wouldn't have had time to do this over dinner."
She struggled to find an excuse then blurted out. "Hermione."
"What about Granger?"
"I copied off her. She doesn't know it. I was sitting near her in the hall. She didn't realise, too busy scribbling her notes and being an insufferable know-all."
Malfoy smirked and nodded. "Now it makes sense."
"Well anyway I was just-"
"No surprises there. Probably had her nose so close to the page she gave herself a paper cut."
"Yes but-"
"If I had a Sickle for every time I'd seen her sat in some dark dank corner face first in a book I'd-"
"Looking at her a lot are you?" Hermione snapped, she'd say anything to get Malfoy to shut his trap.
"I don't- of course not." Draco stuttered glaring at her. "Why would you say that?"
Hermione hadn't expected Malfoy to get so defensive and laughed openly at his reaction.
"Don't laugh! As if I'd ever find such a odious little troll attractive." He gritted his teeth and seethed with anger.
"Ok Draco it was just a joke I was just-"
"You're always saying that though. You know how fed up I am of it."
Pansy was always bringing up Hermione with Draco? The same Draco who took such joy in mocking and goading her.
"I am?" Hermione blurted out. "I mean... Yeah I know I am but-"
"So cut it out. Always going on about how I'm looking at her when she doesn't realise. I know you do it to get a rise out of me but not today!" Malfoy balled his fists tight and slammed one onto the table. "I haven't got time for stupid little games. If I don't finish what he's told me to do-" Draco shot up from his chair knocking it back. He looked manic and raked his fingers through his untidy hair. "I'm running out of time." He walked over to the window and leaned both his hands against it hanging his head looking down at the floor.
Hermione hurriedly got to her feet and walked round the table. She stood behind him and studied his back. He was shaking. She gingerly placed her hand on his shoulder. He shrugged it off but she persevered and placed it on the back of his neck letting her fingers softly rub the back of his hair. She had no idea what she was doing but didn't dare let this moment of weakness slip by unchallenged.
"How long do you have?" She spoke gently.
"The end of term but the pressure's always there. Everyday." He let his forehead rest of the glass and closed his eyes, focusing on the sound of the raindrops starting to patter on the window.
"Pressure from who?"
"Everyone. Snape never takes a day off trying to help and Mother's letters are always telling me how important it is that I don't fail." He turned to look at Hermione with a desperate look of fear in his eyes. "As if I don't know that."
"Look can you not just let me know what-"
"I can't. I've got to do this alone. He gave me the job. I'm not doing this for glory Pansy honestly. I can't sleep worrying about it, when I do sleep I dream about it. He'll do it, I know he will. It's not an idle threat. My family... I can't let anything happen to them I can't..."
"Then don't." Hermione grabbed his hands and forced him to look at her. He didn't resist. "Keep going. I'm not backing off Draco, you can shout at me, you can ignore me but I'll still be here. If you need help I'm here, if you don't I'm here regardless, I'll wait till you're ready to let me in, let me help you if you need me to." Hermione took her time and weighed every word. Too much and Draco would back off, too little and he'd think it was just words. She just imagined she was talking to Harry and let the words flow. "You know you can do this. You're Draco Malfoy, not some talentless Mudblood." She nearly choked on the word. "You're a pure blood wizard. You've got this under control." She forced herself to move her face closer staring hard into his face. He didn't say anything just focused on her words his breathing slowing to a steady rhythm his eyes regaining their focus.
"I can?" His voice didn't have the same air of venom or pomp, it broke and didn't sound like a wizard ready to take on the world. Hermione took both her hands and held his face in them. She pushed his hair back and studied his face. His sharp pointed features, his piecing grey eyes held secrets long kept hidden, a part of Draco Malfoy she never knew existed, a part she knew she'd never know. For a moment, a brief glance in time Hermione forgot what she was there for, forgot why she was holding his face in palms of her hands. She took a further deep breath to regain a clear mind.
"I can. Say it properly."
"I can." He sounded more confident, his chin raised higher off his chest. "I can do this."
Was this right? Should she be encouraging Malfoy like this regardless of what he was up to. If she could discover his plan then it'd be worth it, she convinced herself. She took her hands off his face and nodded in approval. "Good." She sat back down at her desk and left him standing staring at the empty space where she stood. He looked like his mind was whirling, lost in thought.
"Now come on." She patted the books on the table and motioned for him to sit back down.
"Right." He took his seat not taking his eyes off her. He looked dumbstruck as if she'd just punched him in the face. A mix of confusion and fascination. What she had done clearly was not something he would ever expect from the real Pansy Parkinson. The nagging doubt she had gone too far once again nibbled at her mind.
They worked for a few hours on some of their homework in silence. She would catch him every so often glancing up at her. He would smile then go back to his work. It was strange but with no reason for Malfoy to be his usual despicable self he was actually fairly decent company. He didn't constantly nag Hermione for answers like Ron and didn't need the constant encouragement like Harry. He allowed her to think when she needed to and only conversed when she took breaks to refocus and as long as she steered away from certain touchy subjects she was surprised to find he was actually rather funny be it in a slightly dry, pessimistic way.
But she kept reality close at hand always to make sure she never lapsed, she knew that if she was sat there as Hermione not Pansy she would not be experiencing the same Draco as she was now but if she was to suffer for her task then it couldn't hurt for it to be as painless as she could manage.
The glow from the moon started to shine soft shards of light onto their workspace. A small lantern had been lit and sat perched on top of some old books in the middle of the table. Draco yawned heavily and stretched out his arms wide peering at his watch through heavy eyelids. "I think I'll call it a night."
Hermione glanced up from her parchment and nodded smiling. She was glad as she didn't have much time left on her current dose of Polyjuice.
He got up and started shovelling his stuff back into his satchel, clasping it closed tightly. "You coming?"
She shook her head and pointed her quill at the end of her page. "Just want to finish this part before I forget it." She grabbed at the piece of paper Malfoy had forgotten to pack up. It was a piece of Charms work he had left unfinished, full of corrections and scribbles. "There's always more to do isn't there? It never ends."
He took the paper from her and stared at it sighing heavily. "Well there's always tomorrow." He shoved it into his pocket and pushed in his chair. He didn't move and grasped the back of his chair looking down at her. "Are you ok?" He asked looking as if he'd been dwelling on this for a while.
"Of course. Why?"
Draco looked conflicted but ploughed on. "It's just you haven't really been... Well yourself lately."
Hermione gulped hard but smiled back at him. "I know, I'm sorry it's just-"
"Please don't be." He cut her short. "I've never seen this side of you before. I suppose I never bothered to really look." Hermione could tell Malfoy wasn't used to talking quite so intimately even with Pansy and every word seemed to take ages to find his lips. "I didn't think you could be like this. Please don't take offence, it's just well..." Draco scratched at his nose as Hermione continued to watch him, taking great pleasure in watching the boy who made her life miserable act so coy in her presence. "Thank you... For today that is, for..."
"You're welcome." Hermione decided to let him off the hook tonight and end his struggle for words, be it her rush for time or the fact that part of her felt a strange stir in her chest that wasn't there this morning.
He nodded and picked up his bag pulling it high onto his shoulder. "Goodnight." He walked off towards the door and Hermione watched him leave. She flicked her eyes back to her work but didn't see the words, her mind temporarily in spasm.
Why did she feel anxious? Slightly nervous yet excited. It was subtle but it was there. Was it because she had started to make progress with finding out Draco's plan? Yes that was it. She let her quill drop onto the table and rubbed her eyes, leaning on her arm and looking out the window.
She had worked hard and was tired, her mind already on her nice warm bed in the dormitory, which is probably the reason why she didn't hear the footsteps lightly approaching her from the door, didn't see the shadow loom behind her head casting onto the desk, caught off guard as Draco Malfoy's face appeared from her shoulder leaning over her from above. He took her chin in his hand and turned her face towards him, sinking lower and placing his lips on hers, a soft tender kiss that moved into a more passionate affair as he caressed her face. Hermione's eyes were open wide and she wanted to scream, to run, to claw at his face but instead she just sat there dumbstruck as Draco Malfoy the Muggle hating bane of her existence kissed her alone at night in the school library far from the prying eyes of other students, from Harry and Ron, from Ginny, from Luna and Neville, from the many others that hated Malfoy and couldn't stand to be around him. He parted his lips from hers, a content smile on his face. He took her face again and stared into her eyes. Hermione forced herself to smile back all the while screaming inside.
"Thank you." He brushed her cheek and left again putting his hands into his pockets and strolling out the library door.
Hermione just sat there staring straight ahead of her, her hand clasped over her mouth. She could still feel his lips, her own were still wet. She could feel the tears building up against her eyes but bit down hard on her hand and desperately tried to force them to withdraw.
Alone she sat there be it for 15 minutes, 20 minutes or half an hour she couldn't be sure. Her hair had started to turn back to its brown frizzy texture, her face already back to her usual self.
Hermione not Pansy now sat there in the library wanting more than anything to have Harry and even Ron sat by her side. Instead she got to her feet, absentmindedly shoving her stuff back into her bag. She stood at the window for a while taking one last look at the moonlit grounds, over at Hagrid's hut, an inviting plume of grey smoke billowed out the top of it. She longed to be down there now, sat with a huge mug of tea and listening to Hagrid talk about his Blast-Ended Skrewts.