My house was new and in between Seattle and Forks. I still lived close to Forks so I could see Charlie and Jake. Jake was my best friend and a werewolf. He was there for me and took care of me when no one else could. But Jake was out of town he had just gotten married to his imprint, Tracy, and they were on their honeymoon. They were so cute together and they made me cry when ever I saw him look her in the eye. I lived there with my butler, Mr. Christopherson. I sat in the bathroom of my house on the floor trying to open the newest padlock. The pain was just too much it had been a day since I had talked about Edward 2 years and 1 day since I had last seen him… it was too much. I fiddled with the key picks trying to open the new lock. My locks on the medicine cabinet were replaced after every suicide attempt. Gary, my therapist was on full time hire by Charlie and Elli, my manager. His job was to keep all materials that I could use in a suicide attempt away from me and too cover up my suicidal attempts and my mild paranoia. That meant my house was padlock crazy and I could do hardly anything without Gary's approval. He also over saw that no one I came into contact with was really pale. I use to wonder how much they paid him so that he would stay with me, but one day he told me. He gets 50,000 a week and a bonus 10,000 when he covers up a suicide attempt. That blew my mind away and then I realized that the other alternative was going to a mental hospital. So now I sat in the bathroom once again… I really don't want to hurt Charlie but there was no other way. I hate this life. I hated the spotlight and the gossip and the concert and the crazy fans and the loneliness, nobody was really my friend they were imitations and suck ups. I never before had felt really lonely but after Him and His family I was different. The lock clicked. Enough thinking, I was done thinking I was doing this time it would work. Gary was taking a shower, he would never know until it was too late. I unscrewed the cap and I took out 12 pills. I one was enough to knock you out 12 was for good. I took out a pen and paper… I knew they would probably never see this and if they saw it they probably wouldn't care but I had to write them something.

Goodbye Edward.

I loved you and only you. Sadly my mind is not a sieve and time won't heal me. I will die here on this floor thinking of you, loving you and only you. Tell Alice I really loved her like sister. She was my best friend and I miss her almost as much as I miss you. Tell Jasper I wished I had known him better. He seemed cool. Tell Emmett that he was the best older brother ever and that I really needed his jokes I really wished he could have cheered me up some days. Tell Rosalie that even though she never liked me that I wanted so much for her to like me and that one day I wanted to be her sister. Tell Esme that she was like my own mother and a lot of times I thought of her as my own. I loved her so much. Tell Carlisle that I thought he was one of the greatest men ever. That I could never repay him for all the times that he saved my live or one of my limbs. Edward I want to tell you that you are wrong; I am a good actor only those close to me can see my pain. I thought it would be impossible, everyday I wake up and the pain crushes me. I want to see you happy without me; you have probably already found a distraction. Tell her that she is the luckiest girl in the world, that I wish more than anything that I was her. I wish all of you the best of luck in your future; that you are happy and you are safe.

Love Bella

I wrote another letter for Charlie, one for Gary, and one for Jake and Tracy. And then I swallowed the pills and I started falling asleep. I thought I later heard the door crash open, but it didn't matter I was too far along I was going to die. I smiled. And then above all I was gone

"No!" cried a voice I would recognize anywhere… Victoria. "You stupid human! You aren't supposed to die now! I was waiting for the perfect moment and then you have to go and kill yourself .I was supposed to finish you off. You were supposed to feel pain you were supposed to die at my hands, your precious Edward watching on. But you stupid human with your human ways you befriended the werewolves so I had to wait and now you are going to die and I have secret Edward still loves you." My shocked body was convinced this was a dream but part of me thought it was too real to be a dream. I wanted it to be real for what she was saying to be real that Edward still loves me

"No…" I whispered feebly.

"Oh yes. Laurent, you remember him don't you? Well Laurent has moved to Denali imagine his surprise when the Cullen's move there without their little pet Edward seemed so taken to. So taken to they destroyed James. What's more is that everyday Edward would not come out of his room and everyday the pixie-one, Alice, right? Everyday she argued with him bagging him to go back to you or at least join the family. And one day that changed Edward had a little outburst yelling for miles to hear something about not destroying YOUR soul. Then he left. How does it feel to know that you destroyed a whole family's happiness even the blonde one is sad."

"Rosalie? Not real…not real…not real…not real…not real…"

"Oh but it is and now before you die I am going to make you experience the worst pain possible and know that he still loves you how does that feel?" And then her face became so close to me I could see it was really her. It was really real, and that made me cry. Her face was covered with a satisfied smirk and she opened her mouth her so sweet scent wafting to me and then her teeth dug into my skin and I felt the pain. But the pain was only second to the pain when he left. Then she started sucking my blood. I passed out as soon as I smelt the blood. My last thought was Edward. Save me Edward.