Disclaimer: Naw, SGA isn't mine. Only the annoying clock from the previous chapter is.
Author's Note: At long last, the chapter where Michael finally finds out what's happening to him. This has got to be the most sympathetic chapter yet, and I adored writing it.
Important: I will be out of town for the next week, so my regular posting dates (of twice a week) will be seriously postponed. The best advice for waiting that I can offer is to spread this story around, and find as many reviewers as possible. I might not make the week go faster, but isn't it nice to drag someone into your pain?
Chapter 3: Day Three
I am still in this place. I don't know why I could have possibly imagined I would be anywhere else when I awoke this time. Humans didn't simply capture you, experiment on you, and then release you back to your own hive ship. And this nightmare couldn't possibly have been a fantasy formed of my own imagination. Perhaps it is only because I seem to be asleep more than awake now.
The sickening feeling has left me somewhat, but it is still there. What is wrong with me?
Beckett is working on something on the other side of the room. I still cannot focus well, but I am able to discern more today than yesterday. His skin is pale, his hair dark and scruffy in comparison-not unlike a female or a child whose hair has not yet changed its color. I begin to push the thought from my mind but stop myself. No… I might as well allow myself to think of my hive ship. It will bring me hope that more will come for me.
Though how they will find me, with out link stretched so thin, I do not know. If it is my own who find me, then I will be saved. If it is any other ship, then there is a likely chance that they will simply kill me as a weakling or an enemy.
And yet, death does not seem so terrible now that I think of it. I have taken so many lives, seen so much horror, that a part of me has grown hard in the wake of terror. Killing a human no longer frightens or bothers me terribly. Perhaps my own death will be little different.
No! It's not yet time for such thoughts… if an enemy Hive ship came upon me at this moment and killed me, they would be right to do so. Three days with these people and already I am wishing for death to take me. I am a coward.
"Release me," I hiss softly, glaring at the doctor. My voice is higher than usual, softer, but I ignore it, lying perfectly still on the bed. It is no use fighting these bindings; though my strength has returned, I am still too weak to come to any real use from struggles. Beckett turns around and immediately bolts out of his chair.
"Take it easy," he urges, holding up his hands. I am pleased to see that neither grasps a hated needle, but his uneasy demeanor angers me all the same. I pull at my restraints, glaring into his alien face.
"Release me, human, and be spared for the moment," I snarl, my voice deepening back to its usual gruff growl. The doctor shook his head, coming up to my side and analyzing the monitors and machines that had been crowded about me. Insolent humans.
"Why do you keep me here when you know my presence will only hasten your deaths?" I demand icily. Beckett glances down at me, a curious look in his dark eyes.
"I'm afraid you're wrong about that," he told me, turning back to one of the monitors and punching something into a keypad. "You're presence here will have quite the opposite effect if all goes well."
"And then what?" I demand, a smirk rising on my features. He's so close… if I could just allow him to continue coming this close to me for a few more days, I will surely have the strength to kill him then. "Will you execute me once your experiment is complete."
Beckett pauses, his whole form going rigid for a few moments. I have struck something he does not want to acknowledge. Mirthlessly, I allow a laugh to leave my lips.
"You humans are little better than frightened animals with someone else's borrowed technology."
"Would you shut it?" he snaps irritably. I smirk in amusement. It isn't like the doctor to allow frustration to take him. Beckett glances away and mutters, "You're already better off now than before anyway."
My smile fades. Better? How is this possibly better than my true life? It's better to spend days bound to a foreign bed of thin, cold sheets? Better to bear with a strange and foreign pain, sleeping for relief, wishing for death?
Humans are no longer animals to me. They are monsters.
Fury begins to well once more within my chest. Arrogant, deceitful, loathesome maggots! I pitch forward, straining against my bonds, screaming in outrage, but it is not enough. It is never enough! I will have to change that!
I clench my fists together in rage, feeling my nails dig into my flesh. The pain only maddens me more and I am ready to strike out when I am struck.
My nails… this is not normal.
Eyes wide, I glance down at my hand. My hand… once a pale white-blue shade of perfection for my race. It is no longer so, but instead has taken on a darker, more tanned tone as perhaps a female who had spent far too much time outdoors. Shakily, I open my fist, my stomach heaving.
My palm is sticky from the red blood that coated it; blood drawn my puny, shortened nails that seem hugely incapable of causing such damage.
Human… The word echoes in my mind, filthy, ugly, overpowering. I try to drive it away, try to draw up images of my ship in my panic. The scent of cobwebs, the dark corridors, the soft furs of my own bed, my pale-skinned brothers and sisters…
Human…human…human…My breath is coming in short, uneven gasps, my stomach knotting and stretching uncomfortably. My body trembles, then goes tense with fear, then trembles again. I turn wild, furious eyes on the doctor, my rage now turned into a frenzied wrath.
"What have you done to me?" I demand, my whole body taut, preparing to lunge at him. The doctor looks at me, eyes wide with anxiety and pity. I take a quick, labored gasp and jump as far as I can toward him, the wretched bindings holding me back with a sharp sting.
"What have you done to me?" I roar, fighting against my bonds as a maddened beast. The human does not answer, though through my haze of fury I see his jaw clench, that unknown emotion clouding his face. He takes a few hesitant steps backwards, and I lunge again, damning this whole city to a painful death.
"Answer me!" I scream, but the doctor only turns his back and walks quickly toward the exit. I flail wildly, cursing him in my own tongue, which I can no longer speak properly.
"Fool!" I bellow madly. "Release me! You will all die at the hands of the Wraith for what you have done to me!"
The doctor does not heed my words, but leaves the room, never once looking back at me. When I can no longer see his form, a team of military personnel barges into the room, several holding their weapons aloft. I do not say it aloud, but I silently challenge them to do it. Pull the trigger. Shoot me, kill me, stop this experiment for good!
Several hands grab me and push me down again, struggling to still my writhing form as I scream out in fury and pain and defilement. Meaningless words are exchanged, orders thrown about as I pitch forward, swearing their imminent suffering to be as great as mine and then again!
A nurse, frighten and hurried, dashed up with several needles, trembling like a field mouse. She draws near and I try to lash out. Though I cannot touch her, she jumps back in fear, her eyes wide. One of the soldiers takes the needles from her and, thrusts the first one-containing the opaque yellow fluid-into my arm.
I scream in fury, commanding them to stop, but they ignore me. That horrible alien feeling is beginning to take hold of me all the stronger, and in my panic I find that I am utterly lost.
Another needle bites my arm and draws back. I yell in fury, and most of the soldiers and the nurse back away, leaving only those who hold me down. My movements become sluggish. My vision blurs… I try to choke something out and find that I have already forgotten how to speak in the body.
I am losing consciousness again, but now I fear it. What else will happen to me while I hide from the world in slumber? What else will they do to me?
I truly am lost and, for perhaps the first time in my life, I am really, truly alone.
o-o-o-o
Review Replies
Sesshou-kun- heck yeah! I've always had a thing for Connor Trinneer myself. Now him as Michael, well...
Amaruk Wolfheart of the Wraith: Yes, death to clocks. hugs Michael plushie
flah7: Thank you very much! I'll post again asap.
seanait: I am going to glomp you. Very much. Because you gave me the PERFECT idea for chapter 5!
Queen of the Red Skittles: twitch Tell-Tale heart is creepy... And don't worry. I wouldn't stop this thing for anything short of a cameo on the show!
Thank you for reviewing. Now I shall humbly ask that you press that tiny blue button and review some more!