Hello readers! I would like to take a moment to thank you for reading this and sticking with me as I write this. It is greatly appreciated. And if you are wondering, I post song lyrics at the beginning of each chapter because that is the song that I listened to in order to get into the mood for writing this chapter.
Disclaimer: I do not own anything from the Marvel Universe, but Ursa belongs to me.
"I must go on standing
You can't break that which isn't yours
I, oh, must go on standing
I'm not my own, it's not my choice"
-Apres moi, Regina Spektor
It had been six months. Six long, long months full of misery and boredom. Ursa spent her days inside a golden room that had been given to her by Zeus. The God would not take no for an answer, no matter how angry of a no that it was. She had yelled and screamed that she would rather live in a cave than be surrounded by shallow and selfish beings that sat upon a throne of gold and demanded more each day. Eventually Hermes came to her and told her that if were to take the room, she could shut the world out and pretend that no one existed.
And so that's what she did. For the first few weeks Alethea tried to get through to her, telling her that what she did was only for the best, but Ursa would have none of it.
"You should have told me from the beginning!" Ursa yelled through her door. Her mother sighed.
"I wanted to, but I did not want to spoil your time with your friends."
In a quick, swift motion, Ursa flung open her door. "So you left us all in the dark? You let us think that it was just another visit? You didn't think that maybe I would want to use every second I had left with them? That maybe, I wanted to be there more than I wanted to be here- where children are tortured because of their father and looks or simply because they can spin thread better than someone else?" Alethea stood silent. "You weren't thinking of me. You were thinking of yourself." Ursa spat once more before slamming her door shut.
The Goddess stood with fists clenched, trying to keep her strong demeanor up, but instead began to weep softly as she walked away. Ursa was right. Frigga was right. She should not have kept such a secret from them. She should have told Ursa from the beginning what was going on. She had never lied to her daughter, but she had kept the truth from her.
Ursa sat, sketching in one of her many books when she heard a knock on her window. It had been three weeks since she had last spoken to anyone. She sighed before setting down her book and going to the clear glass. Outside, Hermes hovered and motioned for her to open her window. Ursa simply stared at him, giving him a look that said "Are you serious?"
"Come now, Ursa." Hermes shouted, grinning. "You trust me, don't you?"
Ursa bit her lip. He was the only one who was able to keep her sane over the years, the only one who seemed even close to a friend in this place. She opened the window and stepped aside.
"Thank you." Hermes settled behind her bed. He turned to her. "My, you look awful darling."
Of course, the shallow God would think anyone looked awful compared to him. Granted, she had been under the sheets of her bed for days now, not bothering to come out for anything other than food. But Hermes took too much care of himself. His light brown hair shined brightly and his teeth glimmered. He purposely wore loose clothing that showed off the muscles he had. Ursa wondered why she had let him in.
"What do you want, Hermes?" Ursa crossed her arms. Hermes did the same, teasing her.
"Well, I came here to talk to you, but you don't seem to be in a talking mood." The older boy walked up to her, bending over slightly to look at her eyes.
"I'm simply doing what you suggested. I'm shutting out the entire world."
Hermes sneered. "That was only to get you to stop all of that racket. And now that you have, I've come here with a proposal." He cocked his head up, like a snobby child.
"What is it?" Ursa asked flatly. She wanted him out.
"You know of Aphrodite, yes?"
"I do." The shallowest of all Gods and Goddesses in Olympus.
"And you know how," Hermes paused for a moment, thinking of the right words. "Absolute her youth and beauty is?"
Ursa blinked slowly, her eyes rolling into the back of her head almost. "Yes."
"Then I must ask you, will you help me catch her attention? She seems to be obsessed with only mirrors and watching Ares." Hermes sneered.
Ursa thought for a moment before answering. Why would she help someone like him? Someone interested in only helping themselves and no one else? Well, it was either help him or remain in isolation for what would be a very long eternity.
"What would you have me do?" She finally said.
Hermes smiled and bounced a bit. "Simple. Speak to her greatness. Tell her of my glory and how mighty I am." He flexed his small muscles at the last part.
Ursa stifled a laugh. "Very well. But only if you promise me a favor."
Hermes' eyes narrowed. "What sort of favor?"
"I shall tell you once I have done this for you. Now leave so I may ready myself for her highness." Ursa rolled her eyes once more after the herald of the gods had left. How was she supposed to make such a naïve and arrogant thief seem glorious? But then she thought of who she was about to speak to and found that they were the same. This was so hard task, but it wasn't going to be fun either.
Aphrodite stood on one of the many balconies on the side of the Olympian palace. She opened her mouth and felt the warm air blow lightly through her golden hair and across her pink skin. Ursa peaked out the doors and looked at the Goddess. She was indeed the most beautiful of all women, Zeus had been right when he discovered her. No wonder Hermes wanted her for himself.
Ursa slipped through the doors and stood next to the Goddess of Love on the balcony. She did not seem to notice her presence, so she cleared her throat, startling Aphrodite. Two sapphire blue eyes turned to look at her first as daggers then as a gentle glance before returning to the sky.
"It is surprising to see you here. What brings you, child of Alethea?" Aphrodite had no interest in a girl such as her. She posed no threat or opportunity.
"I am here on behalf of Hermes." Ursa spoke confidently. She would not be intimidated by this girl who claimed to know all things about love.
"Oh, the messenger boy? What has he to say?" Aphrodite laughed at both the joy she found in attention and the fact that she was again being chased.
"He finds you," Ursa swallowed the bile rising in her throat. "to be the most divine being there is and he shall have no one if can not have you." She shuddered inside.
"How quaint." Love's Goddess turned to Truth's daughter. "Tell him that he may have me. I am his." Aphrodite smiled deviously. Ursa's jaw fell. "What? Run along, and give him a kiss for me."
"I didn't think it possible." She said after a moment. "You have the kindest husband in all of Olympus who treats you so wonderfully and provides you with the finest jewels he can make." Aphrodite stepped back, shocked. "And yet you not only advertise yourself and allow boys to think you are available, but you encourage them when they come near and chase those who do not have any interest in you." Ursa shook her head. "Your message will be delivered, but know that it will not be with pleasure."
The young brunette turned on her heel and left the beauty shocked. She had never had anyone speak to her in such a way. And she did not plan on being spoken to like that again.
Ursa sat by her window, waiting for Hermes. He had said he would return to find out what his beloved girl had to say to his offer.
After the moon had risen, Hermes flew into her window and looked at her expectantly. He looked like a little boy who was surrounded by gifts.
"She is yours. You may have her." Ursa's hand clenched so tightly, she felt her skin ready to break beneath her nails.
"Oh really?" Hermes crossed his arms. "Well, that is wonderful. But, you may tell her I have no interest in her." The herald shrugged. Ursa's eyes went wide.
"You mean to tell me that I spoke to that pathetic excuse for a Goddess just to have you turn the other way and lose interest?" Ursa stood from her spot on her bed. "I don't understand anyone here! You are all so selfish and shallow that you do not see the kindness in others, nor do you show anyone your own!" She stabbed a finger at him. "All of you believe that if you have gold and jewels, you will be happy and with your power you may have anyone you want. That you will be served because you being alive is just so wonderful, why wouldn't people worship you greatness!" She exaggerated the last part and laced her voice with as much sarcasm as she could muster. "And my mother wonders why I would rather live in Asgard than this place." Ursa sighed.
"Are you finished?" Hermes asked after a moment of silence. He smiled at her surprised expression. "I sent you out today because you needed it. Keeping oneself cooped up is not good for the well being of anyone, even a Goddess." He cocked an eyebrow at her. "So I took it upon myself to get you back into the world. And it seemed to work." He smirked.
"So all those things you said earlier?"
"Were not true, dear. I have no desire to be with Aphrodite as long as her husband is around." The boy bit his lip. "I shall wait for her." Ursa rolled her eyes.
"Well, it is good to know that there is someone here who does not steal someone's most precious thing from them."
"Oh, no, darling. I have stolen many things. The first thing," Hermes waved a finger as he sat in one of the chairs Ursa used when reading. "was fifty cows from Apollo." He patted the cushioned chair next to his. Ursa bit her lip. She had not spoken to anyone for weeks and she would be lying if she said that she did not crave the company of another. But she had hated each person here since she had come back from Asgard, wishing for the company of Loki or Thor or Sif or even Hogun. But she would never see them again.
Ursa sat and crossed her legs, settling into the chair. "Tell me more." She rested her chin on her hands.
Across the stars, the royal family of Asgard ate in silence the night their two friends had left. Even Thor did not have much of an appetite. Frigga was absent, sitting in her room. She had lost the person she had come to love as a sister. Her best friend. Even Odin did not know her the way Alethea had. Often, they would talk so often, they began to talk together, saying exactly the same thing. They would stop and laugh at each other, but loved how in synch they were. And now that was gone forever.
Odin left his two sons to eat alone, comforting Frigga as she mourned. Thor and Loki ate silently, the only sounds being their chewing and their utensils scraping against their plates. Thor wanted to say something to his young brother, but could not come up with anything. He was afraid that if made a comment on what had happened, it would upset Loki. He decided to wait.
Weeks went by, and the two brothers did not speak. Odin trained with Thor when he was not busy with his other duties. He taught him about the hammer he had given Thor, what a king should do and what a king should not do.
"A king must see those that he rules as equals. He must not think himself above them. He must respect them as they respect their ruler." Odin explained one day as it snowed outside. They had gone outside despite the cold and Odin had his son lift heavy weights such as boulders and tree trunks. Thor did not mind, he rather enjoyed the hard labor given to him. It made him feel strong and powerful. Like he could take an entire boulder and crush it in his fist.
"But a king holds the crown, the power." Thor argued. "Should he not be treated as not only a king, but a God bathed in gold? To be feared by all who dare challenge him?"
"You think only of the wealth of the throne." Odin scolded. "The glory of battles and wars won with violence and bloodshed. This is not a path any king should descend upon. Especially one of Asgard." He took one boulder in his hand and tossed it lightly to the young prince, who caught it in both arms and placed it on the snowy ground. Odin sighed. "If you are to ever rule, you must not think as a warrior, but as a wise man." He turned towards the palace. "And a wise man takes good care of his brother." The All-Father said before making his way back to his home.
Thor hung his head at his father's words. He had neglected his younger brother, running from him when the boy needed him. Thor lifted a boulder and smashed it to the ground, but only managed to crack it. He was not fit to be king of Asgard. No one as weak as him could ever rule this realm. He was a selfish coward who only cared for himself.
The eldest prince looked down at his hands, seeing the dirt that stuck to them. His skin was rugged and wet with sweat. Even as he stood in the middle of the snow, he felt over heated. This could not be done by any weak man, he realized. No one but him was outside at this moment. He was strong, strong enough to fight an entire army if they came right now. He was not weak.
Thor lifted the boulder once more and threw it with so much force that it shattered as it hit the ground. He grinned, now sure he could handle anything. He turned and saw that his brother's light was still shining through his window. Time to stop running away.
Loki's mind was wrapped completely around the book he had in his hands as he sat by the fire place in his room. A book of magic, it was. There were pictures of men and wolves and words explaining how these creatures of the moon were not born, but created. Loki found this interesting, worth attempting, but it did not bring him any joy as he thought it would.
Ever since Ursa left, Loki had been trying to distract himself. First with tricks he played on others, such as making a farmer's cows invisible for an entire week, but it did not work. So he turned to his books, teaching himself new spells and learning every recipe for every potion there was. He so wanted to read more of astrology, to find a way to Olympus without the help of the bifrost, which had been blocked from the kingdom where Zeus ruled. But Loki knew that if he were to go there, he would most likely be slaughtered by the enemies of Odin.
Loki was so immersed in the book he was reading that when there was a loud bang on his door, he nearly dropped his book in surprise. Quickly, he hid the book and went to see who was knocking at his door. As soon as he opened it, he wanted to close it.
Thor stood, sweaty and stinking and grinning in the hallway. "Loki," Thor greeted. "I need to speak with you. May I come in?"
The raven haired boy glared at his brother before nodding and stepping to the side. Thor's large feet clunked as he walked over to sit in one of Loki's chairs, resting his head on the beck of it.
"What is it that you have to say, Thor?" Loki asked impatiently. He wanted to be alone, left in peace so that he may study. Right now his mind wondered, undistracted by any books or spells, to the pain he had tried so hard to bury.
Thor leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees. "I have been running from you, Loki. And as your older brother, I should have helped you sooner. I should have been here the whole entire time, but I was not." Loki's brow furrowed in confusion.
"What?"
"You have been grieving alone when you should not be. You have not had anyone to speak to about the pain what you have been experiencing and the fault is mine, brother." Thor stood and placed his hands on Loki's shoulders. "But I am here now and I want to help in any way I can."
Loki beamed his brother. Never had he shown any concern for his brother other than when they went into battle together. Even then, Thor often left him to fend for himself. But never had he come to him in this way, asking him to speak his mind and share a heavy burden he had been carrying. Always he had been jealous of Thor for his strength and relationship with their father, but now he had yet another reason. Thor could open his heart easily, let pain come and go and be unaffected, willing to take on others' pain as well. Loki did not share this quality, but he appreciated that his brother had come to him with it.
"She's really gone." Loki breathed. "We're never going to see her again, are we?"
Thor bowed his head. "I miss her as well."
Neither brother wept, they would never allow themselves to do so, but words of pain and sorrow were spoken all throughout the night. And the next morning, when both princes came to breakfast the next day, talking and making jokes with one another, Odin knew who he would crown as king when his son was old enough.
Ursa spent more and more time with Hermes, exploring all of Olympus and its wonders she had never seen before. Often, she thought of Asgard and the royal family and Loki. She missed him terribly, even as Hermes tried to distract her with tricks and secrets he had learned about the others who lived with them, she dreamed of her green and black covered love each night. Every moment they spent together laughing, playing or simply lying in the grass next to each other under either the sun or moon.
"Hermes," She started one day when they had gone out across the ocean. "Do you know of any passages across the realms?"
Hermes stopped what he was doing and looked at her suspiciously. "Why do you ask?" He eyed her carefully.
"Do not worry, I have no plans to run away. I can not leave my mother." Ursa looked away. "I only want to know that there is a way to see my home again."
"Ursa, this is your home." Hermes took her hand.
"No, it's my mother's home. Not mine." She turned to face her one friend in Olympus. "Please, I only want to know."
The herald of the Gods sighed. "I know a way."
Alethea sat, her eyes flat and expression unreadable in the light of the bright sun. It was never cloudy or rainy in Olympus, Zeus would not allow it. Sometimes they even went weeks without the moon coming out because their king did not want there to be darkness over his land. Alethea did not care though, she only wanted her daughter to speak to her again. She felt the sand near her shift slightly and she turned to see Aphrodite standing, glaring at the ocean.
The blond Goddess had a curse for Ursa. "We shall see how an eternity under water suits you." Aphrodite closed her eyes and began to chant in her head. But her thoughts were interrupted by a tap on her shoulder. She turned and saw the mother of her victim standing behind her. Perfect, she thought, a bonus.
"A beautiful day as always." The Goddess of Love said. "I'm sure Zeus would want to please his pet." Her tone became sharp and Alethea's eyes narrowed "That's right, I know your secrets. I know everything there is to know about love, may it been in the past or if it is going to happen, I will know. And you, my dear, have loved our mighty Zeus before." The blond smirked. "But your child has upset the wrong person. She should not be here." Aphrodite sneered. "I would toss her from this place, but Zeus would have my head. So perhaps a curse will have to do." Then she smirked. "And you won't say anything, for if you do I will tell Hera of your affair with our king. And I'm sure you don't want that."
The beautiful girl began to walk away, thinking she had won, when suddenly her entire body froze. She could not breathe, she could not even move here eyes to look around.
"You may be able to see love that has happened in the past, but you fail to see the love in the present." Alethea's voice came from behind her, coming closer. "I love my daughter more than anything, and I will do anything to keep her safe." The Goddess came to face Aphrodite. "I am the Goddess of Truth, you naïve wench. I breathe truth, control truth. And truth is everything, surrounding us on all sides. Truth lies in every grain of sand on every beach on every planet that exists. I see what is inside, and can bring it out in any way I wish." The blond Goddess was forced to the ground on all fours, Alethea stood above her and spoke with venom in her words. "You are covered with lies and hate. The truth inside is ugly and disgusting." Aphrodite's hands began to wrinkle, losing their youthful pink and her nails yellowed. "Do not threaten my child again, you pathetic weasel."
With that, the Goddess of Truth disappeared. Aphrodite looked down at herself and saw that she had the body of an old hag. Wrinkles and warts covered her skin, her once golden hair was now a pasty grey. She screamed.
Ursa sat at her window sill that night, looking up at the stars. Hermes had told her of a way to return to Asgard by following one thing. Jupiter. He pointed to it just a few hours before, explaining that some believed Jupiter to be the same as Zeus.
"They call me Mercury." Hermes laughed. "But you won't get to Asgard by following me. Just as long as you have Jupiter directly ahead of you, you'll make it there."
"Thank you." Ursa touched his arm. "I won't be going there anytime soon, but it is good to know that there is a way there." She smiled at him.
"Why are you so fond of Asgard?" He asked.
Ursa wrapped her arms around her knees and looked up at the sky. "I'm not quite sure. The land is so full of life and the people are so kind, I made more happy memories there than I ever did here." Ursa shrugged.
Hermes left shortly after that, leaving the girl alone with her thoughts. She spent the rest of the night looking up at the stars, wondering if Loki knew about the passages between realms, and if he was looking at the stars as well.
Waah! Three chapters! Let's keep this up, shall we?
Reviews are wonderful things every author wants to receive, and each reader who does so is a wonderful person that I want to hug.
~SDG