Song List To This Chapter- All links posted on Profile Page.
PARAMORE- DECODE (ACOUSTIC VERSION)
A FINE FRENZY- ALMOST LOVER
LEONA LEWIS- BLEEDING LOVE
Sorry haha I know i'm not too creative with the song list it's probably very common in heaps of fanfics.
but yeah i really like these songs. oh and SORRY if this chapter is not too fun since it contains mostly lyrics.. the following chapters will have more of a story line. after all it's just a reminiscence huh? =)
Ok here goes.
2. REMINISCENCE
I was slowly rising up from a platform in the center of the stage.
The background was encrusted with thick curtains of crystals and over the head was a large Swarovski chandelier with flowing crystals waterfall.
The whole setting resembled a dark night with stars shining bright in the sky.
Nights like those where I lie on our meadow staring up and wondering if we were looking at the same sky.
Everything was so perfect, so magical, almost mocking my reality.
Each song that would be performed represents different chapters of my heartbreak journey.
The opening song of the concert.
Decode.
The first chapter of my story. A reminiscence really.
One of the very first songs I have ever written. About him. About Us.
Us ,stumbling upon each other. Figuring out what he truly was.
Breaking down his protective wall.
"How can I decide what's right,
when you're clouding up my mind?
I can't win your losing fight
all the time"
"Nor could I ever own what's mine,
when you're always taking sides.
But you won't take away my pride.
No, not this time.
Not this time."
"How did we get here?
Well I used to know you so well
But, how did we get here?
Well, I think I know"
"The truth is hiding in your eyes,
and it's hanging on your tongue.
Just boiling in my blood.
But you think that I can't see
what kind of man that you are;
if you're a man at all.
Well, I will figure this one out
on my own."
"How did we get here?
when I used to know you so well
How did we get here?
Well, I think I know"
"Do you see what we've done?
We've gone and made such fools
of ourselves.
Do you see what we've done?
We've gone and made such fools
of ourselves."
"How did we get here?
when I used to know you so well
Well, how did we get here?
when I used to know you so well. yeah
I think I know..."
"There is something I see in you,
it might kill me.
I want it to be true."
There, I laid out the first chapter of my story.
Relief spread through me. One down. Several more to go. Yay.
"Ok guys this little number is called Almost Lover, It's hasn't been released in any of my albums yet.
So... Enjoy!"
"Your fingertips across my skin
The palm trees swaying in the wind
Images"
Remembering his stone cold fingers lingering on my shoulders, my waist, almost not wanting to loose contact.
Well, I never intended to let go of him. How I missed those touches so very often.
"You sang me Spanish lullabies
The sweetest sadness in your eyes
Clever trick"
At the end of your liquid topaz eyes always had a tinge of sadness in it.
Your every move, every smile, every touch manages to send electric currents through my body.
I've always wanted to tell you that everything was ok. Everything was perfect.
If you had given me more, it would have eventually just throw our relationship out of balance.
But you never listened.
Thus.
My heart break.
"I never want to see you unhappy
I thought you'd want the same for me"
I pressed my hand tightly to my chest. Trying to keep my heart in place.
After feeling more secure, I closed my eyes.
"Goodbye, my almost lover
Goodbye, my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to think about you
Can't you just let me be?
So long, my luckless romance
My back is turned on you
I should've known you'd bring me heartache
Almost lovers always do"
"We walked along a crowded street
You took my hand and danced with me
Images"
"And when you left you kissed my lips
You told me you'd never ever forget these images, no
I never want to see you unhappy
I thought you'd want the same for me"
"Goodbye, my almost lover
Goodbye, my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to think about you
Can't you just let me be?
So long, my luckless romance
My back is turned on you
I should've known you'd bring me heartache
Almost lovers always do
I cannot go to the ocean
I cannot drive the streets at night
I cannot wake up in the morning
Without you on my mind
So you're gone and I'm haunted
And I bet you are just fine
Did I make it that easy
To walk right in and out of my life?"
Those nights that I snuggled up closely to his stone chest feeling safe and secure.
The next thing I know I wake up screaming and soaked in sweat in the middle of the night.
Oh and. Yes of course it would alright to right in and out of my life.
The things he put me through. He thought it would've made my life easier?
Even till this day I still find it hard to say his name.
"Goodbye, my almost lover
Goodbye, my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to think about you
Can't you just let me be?
So long, my luckless romance
My back is turned on you
I should've known you'd bring me heartache
Almost lovers always do"
I gave my audience a brilliant smile and bowed. Applause filled the stadium.
"Hey New York! Hope your enjoying my show!". The crowd cheered.
"COZ WE'RE JUST GETTING STARTED!" I said enthusiastically.
Sometime I really wonder how I'm capable of putting on this happy face after singing these depressing songs.
I took a deep breath, trying to push everything unnecessary out of my mind.
"And this one... What can I say. It's been played on the radio a trillion times. You know you can guess it.
Yes Yes Yes... Bleeding Love!" The crowd chanted on.
"Closed off from love
I didn't need the pain
Once or twice was enough
And it was all in vain
Time starts to pass
Before you know it you're frozen "
The painful months that went by leaving me more and more insensitive each day.
The days that passed by with me walking around like a zombie, not realising what I was doing.
When I was on Auto-Pilot mode. So many months before Jacob saved me from myself.
"But something happened
For the very first time with you
My heart melts into the ground
Found something true
And everyone's looking round
Thinking I'm going crazy
But I don't care what they say
I'm in love with you
They try to pull me away
But they don't know the truth
My heart's crippled by the vein
That I keep on closing
You cut me open and I
Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love
I keep bleeding
I keep, keep bleeding love
Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love
You cut me open"
With piercing eyes I scanned through the crowed, trying to drown every word through everyone.
The audience were sitting in their seats silently, mesmerize, burning red face.
They were just as flaming up in side as me. My words got to them.
"Trying hard not to hear
But they talk so loud
Their piercing sounds fill my ears
Try to fill me with doubt
Yet I know that the goal
Is to keep me from falling
But nothing's greater
Than the rush that comes with your embrace
And in this world of loneliness
I see your face
Yet everyone around me
Thinks that I'm going crazy, maybe, maybe
But I don't care what they say
I'm in love with you
They try to pull me away
But they don't know the truth
My heart's crippled by the vein
That I keep on closing
You cut me open and I"
Crossing my arm across my chest I sang on.
Each word stronger and stronger to the point where the blood flowing through me felt like burning lava.
Keep, keep bleeding love
I keep bleeding
I keep, keep bleeding love
Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love
You cut me open
And it's draining all of me
Oh they find it hard to believe
I'll be wearing these scars
For everyone to see
I don't care what they say
I'm in love with you
They try to pull me away
But they don't know the truth
My heart's crippled by the vein
That I keep on closing
You cut me open and I
Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love
I keep bleeding
I keep, keep bleeding love
Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love
You cut me open and I
Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love
I keep bleeding
I keep, keep bleeding love
Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love
You cut me open and I
Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love"
I felt hot tears trying to escape pass the corner of my eyes.
Nevertheless. I won't cry, I've long run out of tears.
It seems like every time I sing, I still feel the huge emotions slamming right into my body.
All those memories rushing back at me all over again. It's almost like I make myself relive them as if the nightmares every night isn't enough already.
"OK GUYS BE BACK IN A SEC. I'M GOING TO CHANGE NOW NOW NOW"
Applause. Of course.
It was a relief that a few songs has been finished. But something wasn't quite right.
I hurried past the hall way and the stage staff and Jacob meeting me halfway with a concerned look.
He opened the waiting room door for me, and I walked in without a word.
"What's wrong Bells, you look so pale and worn-out." He lightly touched my forehead.
I cringed at his ice cold touch, which was unusual, Jacob was always warm.
"Hey Jake could you turn the air con on? It's boiling in here." I frowned.
"What are you talking about Bella , the air con is on. It's Freezing in here." He raised his brows in confusion.
The air filled with a sickly sweet scent that brought chills down to my spine.
But I was burning up regardless.
********************************************************************************************