Author's Note: Thanks for the reviews and support! I'm so honored that you guys have such confidence in me. O.O ^-^

So, as I'm not as completely organized with this story as I am with Forgotten Bonds, this chapter has a different title since while writing it out, things played out that I wasn't really expecting.

So, you know in the warnings I told you about another undisclosed pairing. Well, it's now safe to say that the pairing is Slade/Mary. I'm excited for it, too. ^-^ I don't think I've really seen any true romantic writings with Slade in it. I think it'll be interesting. Hehe!

On with the story!

Chapter Three

Growing Lies

Now what?

What do I do now?

Robin's chest heaved deeply as he breathed. He had agreed. He had actually agreed to visit the psycho three times a week on the premise that the man would stop threatening the city. What had possessed him to do such a thing? Visiting Slade? What kind of crap nonsense was that?

Would Slade keep his word?

Would Robin?

Robin leaned his head against the wall that was behind his bed; breathing in deeply again. What was he supposed to tell his friends? They'll be expecting him to say something. He was their leader. Just what was he going to tell them? He told them to give him some time first; but they were probably waiting impatiently for him to debrief them. Would he tell them the truth?

The truth…

What the heck was he supposed to say to them?

"Oh, yeah. Slade tried to blackmail me into being his apprentice with your lives. But he totally decided not to when he learned he was my father. Oh, yeah. Did I mention that? Slade's my pop."

Suuure, that'd go over just perfectly.

If Robin thought they didn't trust him very much now, just what would they think if they learned that? He was the man's son. If he learned that one of his team members was the child of a villain and had done what he'd done – don an alter ego of a criminal to find out about said villain – Robin would have a very hard time trusting that team member.

So, in essence, Robin wouldn't be able to trust himself.

He pulled his knees to his chest and wrapped his arms around his legs; dropping his face into his knees. His shoulders began to shudder, yet there were no tears nor sobs.

He was the son of a criminal – not just any criminal; Slade.

Slade.

Why'd it have to be him? Heck, at that moment, Robin was heavily wishing that the crazed Joker was his father. But then, Robin would probably admit himself to a mental institution in the worry about going completely insane like him.

Why was it Slade? Why had his mother chosen him? What kind of destiny played out that would lead the two of them together? What had drawn her to the man? Was he handsome or something? Was that it? Could physical attraction completely negate all reasoning? Wasn't Slade a criminal?

But Robin hated himself for thinking like that. His mother had been amazing. She had been beautiful. She wasn't shallow. Robin could never remember her ever disliking someone for what they looked like. She never judged people. She was the kindest woman Robin had ever known, next to Starfire.

She had always taught him to give people the benefit of the doubt; to never judge someone by their background, their color, their race. She always taught him that all people were just that – people. Everyone deserved a chance.

Robin was giving Slade that chance, wasn't he? By accepting the deal, Robin was subconsciously giving the man a chance to explain himself. The simple knowledge that Slade was his father was enough to shake his very core; the obsession fading slightly to be replaced with the sincere feeling of wanting the truth.

Robin wanted to know the truth.

His heart was already changing; Robin could feel it. He was already becoming swayed. Deep down Robin had always wanted his life back with his parents. Sure he loved what he did now, but the price he had to pay to get to this level had been too high.

Deep within the cavernous sections of his heart, Robin really wanted a father. He needed that support. Eight years; eight years he had to live without a father. Batman had been there for him, but he never rose up to take the place of his father – the man never tried to fill that void.

Perhaps he was being careful, thoughtful, or just plain hesitant; but Robin sometimes had wished that Batman had tried to do so.

But there was no changing the past. Robin had done just fine without a father all these years. He wasn't that desperate enough to cling to some crackpot that popped out of nowhere with the claims of being his father.

This was Slade, after all. Robin had to tread very carefully around him. This could very well be one of the man's sinister plots. If Robin couldn't even trust himself, what made him think that he'd ever learn to trust Slade?

Robin spent most of the early morning brooding, thinking on what he should do next. He might've dozed some, but for the most part, he stayed awake; unable to sleep. He was exhausted, yet sleep wouldn't come. Robin was especially afraid of what nightmares would come to plague him next due to his recent acquired knowledge.

He didn't surface when the sunlight of the morning began to spill through his window. He still couldn't bear the thought of facing his friends. Maybe if he stayed in his room all day, they wouldn't try to disturb him.

Fat chance that'd be.

Robin's stomach growled once around two in the afternoon, but he still didn't emerge from his room. It was sometime afterwards that he heard the commotion outside his door. He tensed, wondering if Slade was already breaking his promise.

"Star, you should leave him alone," came Cyborg's strained voice. "No, don't knock."

"But I am worried," came Starfire's voice. Robin's chest tightened as his stomach churned. "He has not joined us in the partaking of the breakfast and I fear that he will miss in partaking of the lunch with us."

"Maybe he wants some space?" suggested Beast Boy.

"He did look stressed afterwards," came Raven's whispered voice. "He's not telling us something, I think."

Crap.

All of them were outside his door?

Robin closed his eyes, wishing he could crawl beneath the covers and hide for a few years.

But he couldn't. There was no rest for him. He had to tell them something – anything. He just hoped that Raven wouldn't notice that he wasn't telling the truth.

The truth was too difficult at that moment.

"But I still think—"

Robin's door slid open with Robin standing in the doorway. Each of his friends flushed at his sudden appearance. Cyborg was holding onto Starfire's wrist, trying to stop her from knocking, but her inhuman strength wasn't phased at all by him.

"Hey, guys," said Robin, trying to sound pleasant. There was a conflicting churning inside his stomach that was telling him otherwise, however. The group quickly assembled themselves, each still flushing slightly. The girls were the first to recover.

"It is glorious to see you, Robin," said Starfire, her face glowing in a bright smile. "I hope you are well."

"I'm doing just fine," said Robin. Unfortunately it came out a bit stiff. Raven narrowed her eyes.

"Robin, are you sure you're all right?"

"Oh, yeah," said Robin nonchalantly, giving the girl a shrug. "I think I just was a bit worn out."

Robin gave a fake yawn, stretching a bit.

"In fact, guys; I still might be a little tired."

"Uh, but we were kinda hoping you would tell us what happened after your fight with Cinderblock," said Beast Boy, looking up at him with a mixture of hope and apprehension.

"Oh, yeah."

Robin's heart pounded loudly inside his chest.

"After I defeated Cinderblock, I got a lead to where Slade was."

His pounding heart drowned out all hearing; the blood roaring inside Robin's ears.

"Lead was a dud. Came up nothing. I looked and looked, but nothing."

All sound evaporated as Robin waited for a response.

Cyborg was the first to bring sound back to Robin's world. There was a small sigh of confusion from his friend and a shake of his head.

"I can't understand it," said Cyborg. "The detonator was a fake, too. What's up with Slade?"

"Maybe he really was just messing with us," said Beast Boy. "Maybe the guy really was just playing a game with us."

"There's only one term for that," said Raven in her deadpan voice. "That's just plain freaky."

Robin raised an eyebrow at Raven's unusual statement. The other boys looked a little surprised by the girl's comment as well. Seeing the group's confusion, Raven rolled her eyes.

"It's disturbing to think that Slade would enjoy messing with us like that," continued Raven.

"But the guy doesn't seem like the type to enjoy these kinds of games," said Cyborg with a shake of his head. "I mean, I'd expect this kind of stuff from that magician dude, Mumbo Jumbo, or that British wannabe, Mad Mod; but Slade? Just doesn't make sense."

"I feel like we are overlooking something important," said Starfire.

Robin's mouth went dry, his heart thumping even faster inside his chest. He thought it was going explode. He needed to be alone. He couldn't handle all this talk about Slade's motives. He'd crack no doubt. The pressure of holding back the secrets of his heart would cause him to crack.

His friends would never understand; that much Robin knew in his mind.

"Hey, guys; I'm gonna rest a little more," said Robin, pointing inside his room. "I'll see you guys later."

"But what about the partaking of the lunch together?" asked Starfire, looking worried.

"I'm not hungry."

The door slid closed, leaving Robin is the dimmed lighting of his room. His stomach rumbled deeply. With a sigh, Robin leaned his forehead against the cool steel surface of his door.

Just how many more lies was he going to bury himself under? Just how many more times was he going to tell his friends yet another untruth; trapping himself in yet another web of deceit? The burden of his lies were bearing terribly on his back, making him psychologically hunch over beneath its weight.

How was he supposed to lead this team if he couldn't even trust himself to speak the truth about the little things? Why did he hold back? Why couldn't he just say he wasn't feeling good or that he just didn't feel like eating with them?

Why did he just lie?

His heart twisted inside his chest.

Was he really Slade's son? Beast Boy had compared him to the man; was he really like him? Was he really someone who was a deceitful person, one shadowed with lies?

A dry sob broke from Robin's lips. He quickly bit his lower lip, holding it back. He wouldn't cry. There were no tears. He was too old for that kind of crap. He had to remain strong. No matter how hard things got, Batman never cried or showed weakness. Robin couldn't let weakness settle inside his heart.

No matter how horrible a person he was turning out to be.

He was hungry, but he didn't leave his room. He was exhausted, but he didn't sleep. The only thing he did was watch the clock tick the hours away. It was around eight o`clock at night that he started to move. He promised the man he would come tonight. He was going to keep that promise. No matter how many lies he told, he would at least keep this promise.

For the people of the city.

Robin rolled off his bed, walking into his bathroom. He took a quick shower, turning the warm water as hot as he could stand it; almost in the attempt to burn away the horrible feeling that was rising in his soul.

Finally, he got out of the shower, no longer able to stand it anymore. After drying off and with a towel wrapped around his waist, he stared at his reflection in the slightly fogged mirror. Even through the fog, Robin could see them all too well; that pair of haunting crystal blue eyes.

He was going to have to show Slade his face.

That was the agreement. Slade would show him his face; Robin was to do the same.

But taking the mask off meant that he wasn't Robin anymore. He was Richard or Dick, that gypsy orphaned boy that had grown up in a circus.

This was going to be so much harder than Robin had ever imagined.

Robin quickly got dressed. But instead of his usual Kevlar suit, he wore civilian clothes. Somehow, he didn't want to go tonight wearing his suit. He wanted a clean slate; remove the sin of his lies. He didn't feel worthy wearing that suit anymore, not after keeping this from his friends – at least not while he was going to visit Slade.

He'd still bring his utility belt, though.

Robin slipped into a pair of dark blue jeans and a black t-shirt. He grabbed a light blue jacket and put it on, covering the utility belt that was around his waist. He left his hair ungelled, the damp bangs of his raven black hair dangling just over his eyes. Robin glanced at the domino mask that laid on his bedside end table. Ignoring the apprehensive feeling that was rising inside his chest, he pulled out a pair of black sunglasses from his drawer and hid his eyes beneath their cover.

He plugged his hands into the pockets of his jacket. With one final glance through his room, he walked to his door.

He was really doing this; he was really going to see Slade. He was really going to keep this promise. He really wasn't going to tell his friends about it. He really was lying to them. Robin wasn't sure how much more he could take of the twisting feeling his heart was currently going through.

His bedroom door opened and he walked into the hallway. He quietly walked down the hall, keeping his footsteps silent. Then, he turned the corner.

"Robin…?"

Robin froze. He slowly closed his eyes beneath his sunglasses.

Of all the Titans to see him leave, it had to be her – the one he couldn't resist, the one he couldn't deny. What was he going to tell her? Why did he have to bump into her?

"H–hey, Star," said Robin, his mouth going dry. Starfire was standing in front of him with an extremely curious look on her face as she observed him.

"Robin… I have never seen you wear other clothes," said Starfire, tilting her head slightly as she continued to study him. Robin felt his face flush slightly from the way she was looking at him.

"Aha, yeah…"

"What is the occasion for such a change?"

Robin swallowed, his dry throat protesting heavily against the action. He glanced downward, praying that he could get through this.

"I needed some fresh air."

"Oh! Shall I accompany you?"

Robin's heart sunk. He didn't want to reject her. That very thought made Robin sick to his stomach. Why couldn't he have left just a few moments later? Then, their paths wouldn't have crossed. He hated himself; there was no doubt about it now.

Robin hated himself.

"Um… I kinda need to be alone right now," said Robin, his voice low as his heart continued to twist violently in his chest.

"Oh…"

She sounded so disappointed. Dang it; she sounded so disappointed.

"Robin." Robin glanced up, a little startled to see Starfire so close to him. There was a deep look of concern within her kind face. "Is everything all right?"

Was everything all right?

No, everything was not all right. He was lying left and right to his friends, trying to hide every terrible, dark secret of his heart; not to mention he just learned that he was the biological son of the local sociopath.

Oh yeah, sure; everything was just perfect.

But could he tell her? No, there was no way he could tell even Starfire the dark secrets of his heart. His options were terrible ones. What would his friends say if they knew Slade was his real father and that he made a deal with the man so that he'd stop the criminal activity? What would they think if they knew the deal was to visit the man so many times a week? Would he tell them the man tried to blackmail him with their lives? Would he tell them the mixed torrent of feelings that were currently raging inside his chest?

Just who was he?

Could he really place his trust in them? Would they look at him differently? Would they trust him more or would they trust him less? If he told them, it showed that he was placing full trust in them.

But what if they threw it back at him when they learned something so terrible about him?

If he didn't tell them, then that showed he didn't trust them. What would they say when they did find out? Would their friendship be completely destroyed, never to be repaired once again?

Just where was he supposed to place his trust?

He couldn't even trust himself. He wasn't worthy of such things anymore. He couldn't protect Jump City from Slade. He was weak. Slade had the upper hand. Robin was still playing in his hands. Robin was only appeasing the man to protect the city; it was still basically blackmail.

Robin wasn't doing anything in his own power to save them.

If or when Slade got bored with the arrangement, the city was in danger once again. Robin would be powerless against him – that much Robin knew all too terribly well.

What would Batman do in a situation like this?

What would… John Grayson do in a situation like this?

There was no one he could depend on.

"I'm fine, Star," lied Robin. "I just need a little time, okay?"

Starfire looked saddened, her soft monochromatic green eyes looking so dejectedly at him. Robin's entire being fought against the overwhelming force that was threatening his body with total trembling.

"All right," said Starfire, her voice soft.

"I'll see you later, Star. Thanks," said Robin, walking past her with his head down. Then, he broke into a run. He had to get out of here – as quickly as possible; before he went insane; before he had to bury his entire being in his terrible burden.

He hated these secrets. Batman was the master at keeping secrets. Robin had long learned how to hack into the Bat computer for information. That, of course, got him into terrible, terrible trouble with the Dark Knight; but he hadn't cared. He had always hated it when Batman kept secrets from him, swearing that he'd never do it.

And here he was, doing the same exact thing he had sworn never to do. Was he losing his humanity already?

Once he was out of the tower, he took a deep breath; breathing in the salty air of the bay of Jump City. It was a refreshing smell. It always brought him clarity of mind, but tonight there was no clarity.

Just fog over the bay; almost in symbolism of the fog of his mind and heart.

As he walked the streets of downtown Jump City, he noticed that he looked like every other citizen. Since he was wearing civilian clothes, he wasn't recognized. It had been a long time since he felt something like this.

But no matter the outer appearance, he was still the same Robin that was lying to his teammates.

It was soon that he found himself glaring at the door of Slade's haunt – the very same door that he had blasted just the night before. However much he was glaring at that repaired door, there was newfound panic rising inside his chest.

Just what the heck was he doing here?

Second thoughts were overwhelming his entire soul. He shouldn't be here. He should've at least told Starfire where he was going, what he was planning to do. There were so many things he should've done. He should've told them he was hungry. He should've told them that he had met Slade. With every part of his heart, he should've relied on someone other than himself.

But after eight years of getting used to relying on himself, it was hard to break the habit.

Robin was about to knock on the door, figuring it'd probably be better than blasting through the door like last night, when it slid open. Robin had to take a step back in surprise.

Slade stood in the doorway.

But what was shocking Robin the most was the man's appearance. He still wore the two toned metal mask, but his clothes were not his usual Kevlar suit. The man wore dark classic style Levi's; a black belt with a silver buckle around his waist. He wore a light blue, pinstripe collared shirt with a dark grey suit vest.

The only thing that reminded Robin that this man was Slade was the mask he still wore and the two toned black and orange tie at his neck.

"How—"

"I have cameras."

Robin didn't bite his lip, no matter how much he wanted to at that very moment. He was really here. He was really coming to see Slade. What were they going to do – talk over tea?!

"Come in," said Slade, his voice even. Robin found his palms sweating in his panic. But he tried to put on an uncaring air as he strode inside. He was about to step down the stairs when he felt a hand on his shoulder. Immediately, he stiffened from the touch.

"Not that way. We're going upstairs."

The hand withdrew and Robin turned around to see stairs sliding into place from out of the wall, going upwards into the midst of more gears. He tried to control his trembling. He liked being touched sometimes, but he wasn't used to it. For the man to so easily touch him like that, it startled him. It frightened him, too. It was too familiar. Even during his time with Batman, the man never showed that kind of familiarity.

Such simple, easy familiarity with adults had long died with Robin's parents.

Robin placed a hand on the wall as he followed up the stairs after Slade. He glanced back to see the stairs sliding back into the wall after he left each one. At the top, Slade opened a door and led Robin inside. With the door shut behind him, all sounds of the clinking, grinding gears were silenced immediately.

Robin felt clammy. He swallowed nervously, unconsciously rubbing a hand on his arm. He looked around the room and was once again surprised.

He was inside a combination of a kitchen and family room. Everything looked bright and clean. There were a few white cabinets towards the back of the room, where the kitchen resided. It was a fully furnished kitchen, complete with a white fridge and a stove. There was even a microwave. An island separated the family room from the kitchen, with a round wooden table in front of the island.

The family room had a light brown three seat sofa with a single brown armchair to the side. There was a glass coffee table in front the sofa with a few miscellaneous things like a couple of magazines, a book or two, and TV remote. There was a television set on a wooden desk at the end wall near the door.

Robin was overcome with how normal it looked.

"Are you hungry?" asked Slade, walking past him. Robin's stomach automatically responded to the thought of food. He hadn't eaten all day. He wrapped a single arm around his waist and turned his head away.

"No."

Another lie.

"I'm not deaf, boy," said Slade, a light chuckle escaping into the room. "Sounds like your body is more truthful than your mouth."

Robin stiffened.

"Well, I really don't think I wanna eat anything you have to offer," snapped Robin, irritably whipping his head up to glare at the man from behind his dark sunglasses.

"That's better," said Slade, pulling out a few things from the fridge. Robin growled under his breath as he stepped into the room more. Slade threw a number of things onto the middle countertop. Robin raised his eyebrow as he watched the amount pile up with lettuce, tomatoes, pickles, sliced deli meat, cheese, mayo, ketchup, and bread. Robin continued to walk closer to the island until he was standing right in front.

Then, Slade placed plates onto the countertop. He waved a hand over everything.

"Take your pick."

"Huh?"

"I said take you pick," said Slade with an amused tone. "Make your own. Pretty self explanatory here, lad."

Make your own? Slade's seriously telling me to eat his food?

Slade went into motion and Robin watched as the man made his own sandwich, using the whole wheat bread instead of the white bread. The man choose a mixture of ham and turkey, plenty in amount, and little cheese. He used a small amount of mayo and also placed a healthy amount of pickles. He took a few slices of tomatoes and a handful of lettuce.

Robin could only watch, stunned.

Why it had never crossed his mind that Slade was a person that had to eat for sustenance, he would never know. But watching the man make his own sandwich, with glaring obvious preferences, was seriously startling to Robin's system.

"Well, go on," said Slade, waving to the ingredients. "I know you're hungry."

Robin obeyed, for lack of anything else to say in argument to this. He couldn't help but wonder if the man had drugged the food. But Slade had made his own sandwich. Robin wouldn't dare touch it before Slade took a bite. There was no telling what this man could do.

So, Robin choose white bread, ketchup, turkey, cheese, lettuce, and tomatoes.

Everything felt surreal. This had to insane, crazy; absolutely the most bizarre, strangest thing Robin had ever experienced. He was making a sandwich… in Slade's kitchen. He felt odd and uncomfortable, unable to know what to expect. He felt completely awkward, too, with the man. In one sense, this man was the criminal that he had been so obsessed with taking down.

But in the other sense, this man was supposedly his father.

After Slade was finished assembling his sandwich, he stopped for a moment. Robin wasn't about to touch his own without knowing the man had eaten his first. What Robin had forgotten was the fact that the man would have to remove his mask to eat.

Which is exactly what the man did.

Robin's eyes widened as he watched Slade lift a hand to the metal mask and pull it off. There was no stopping him, Robin stared – stared into the face he had been so determined to unmask, and yet here it was so easily removed.

The first thing Robin noticed was that Slade had a black eye patch over his right eye – the same section that the black covered in his mask. The man looked to be in his late thirties to early forties, with high cheekbones and a prominent jaw line. He had short curly blond hair and a blond goatee that lined the edges of his mouth and chin.

Then, there was that crystal blue eye that looked so much liked Robin's pair.

There were glimpses within the man's appearance that reminded Robin of himself at times. It was subtle and vague, but it was there. Robin supposed that he got more of his mother in his appearance. But seeing the man's face, Robin was more sure of it.

He was Slade's son.

It was a frighteningly sobering moment for Robin. He wasn't just seeing it in print; he wasn't just hearing it about it in voice; he was seeing the evidence right before his very eyes in the form of genetics.

He had never been John Grayson's son. He had never truly looked like that man. Even the man's grey blue eyes had been different. But Slade's single eye was an exact match to Robin's pair.

Gosh, Robin felt like crying at that very moment. There was a terrible wave of emotion that tore over his entire soul. Then, he saw the expectant, almost wry look on the man's face that was clearly telling him to take off his sunglasses. But if Robin did that, then all the emotion that was flooding through him would be perfectly readable.

He slowly lifted a hand to his sunglasses and took them off, keeping his gaze downwards. He quickly took a bite of his sandwich, completely ignoring the fact that Slade hadn't first taken a bite of his own sandwich. Saliva built up in Robin's mouth and it wasn't because he was eating. His emotions were building up even more; rising to the ultimate cliff in its power.

He refused to cry.

And yet, sometimes the hormonal and bodily needs from continual lack of sleep and lack of food can break down one's protective barriers. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't stop the single tear that slipped down his face. He ignored it, pretending it wasn't there; continuing to eat his fill of his sandwich.

Yet another one slipped through his defenses, unwanted, unbidden, yet long locked inside.

Next Time: Chapter Four: Wisdom of the Past – Slade reveals some of the tales of the past about him and Mary, even showing relics from their past.

Author's Notes: Wheeh… This story is turning out a little more powerful than I thought it would. What was merely a little plot bunny is turning out way more than I could've imagined. XD

Should be fun.

Thanks for reading! See ya next time! Reviews = love and ideas! ^.^