Carlisle POV
Well, that went surprisingly well. Nobody seemed to notice that I couldn't really taste how they made their food or if they did it the right way. And nobody complained about their grade. The only one who needed to really clean up after this lesson was my son. No surprise here. Next is biology. Let's see who is on the list of this class. Edward, Bella and Emmett. Nice. Just as I entered the class, the sponge flew throughout the room, landing directly on my already crumpled and dirty shirt-thanks to Emmett of course. As I looked up to find out where the sponge came from, my son Edward smirked and pointed at his brother, who looked rather wide eyed and scared. I sighed. "Emmett, was it really you?" He mumbled something I couldn't understand. "Louder, please, I can't hear you." "Yes, Pops, it was me I'm really sorry. Can we please just forget it, seeing as your shirt was already ruined?" I suppressed another sigh. "Emmett, let's deal with this after school." His eyes widened a bit more. That earned a few snickers from the class. I decided to just go on with what I tried to start: the lesson. "So, good morning class. As you may have noticed, I'm the new substitute teacher, Carlisle Cullen. A few of you may have seen me already." Quiet mumbling around the room, and a few giggles. Girls, of course. I suppressed a groan. I already hated those nurses lusting over me, and they were, in human years, about my age. But they were teenagers, for God's sake! " Alright. Your teacher left me a note, saying that you are supposed to be through with sexual education just now. Since there is no note about the next topic, I will just do a little quiz with you. Groans could be heard around the room. "So, let's start with the construction of the organs. Can anyone tell me the function of the prostate?" Very few people were raising their arm. I expected it to be more, since they just talked about this. "Guys, come on. More people should know this." But nobody else raised his arm. I sighed. "Okay" I glanced at the seat plan "Mike, would you please tell us?" "It should prevent the sperms from getting killed inside of the vagina." "That's right. Now, can anyone tell me what the function of the clitoris is?" Nobody moved. I suppressed a grin. That was exactly what I thought would happen. "Nobody? Well, at least the ladies should know." I smiled, seeing a few of them-including Bella- instantly blushed at that comment. But again, nobody raised his arm. I would just have to pick a student. What about- "Bella, how about you tell us. I'm sure you know it." This time I made no attempt to hide my grin. Bella just blushed a deeper shade of red, as Emmett snickered and Edward stiffened beside her. "Ähm, yeah, well, you see, it's the, äh, most effective form of, äh, stimulation for women." By now she was as red as a fire truck. I smiled reassuringly at her. "That's right Bella" I replied kindly, as to decrease her rapid heartbeat. She smiled somewhat forced. She still looked really uncomfortable. Edward just glared at me, while Emmett grinned widely. "Emmett, since you are enjoying yourself so much over there" His grin fell immediately " Why don't you tell us why some men need their foreskin to be cut and how their stimulation works?" I grinned evily at that. The whole class giggled. Emmett just looked at me wide eyed and started to open his mouth, but then shut it again. This was going to be good. Let's see how long he needs to find an answer.
Emmett POV
How could he do this to me? And how in the world was I supposed to know that? My day was just getting better and better….. "I don't know." I finally confessed. Carlisle just grinned wider. "Well, that's just to bad, son." By now the class was stifling their laughter. "Maybe you could tell us more about the ureter and the vas deferens? How is that supposed to work, since it is the same object in your body?" Man, he really was evil and sadistic. I don't even use my bladder anymore. But the teacher told something about that. Shoot. Maybe I should start listening to the teacher. "I'm sorry, I don't know." Carlisle raised an eyebrow at me. "Really? Can anyone else tell me?" Thank God. I just hope this will be over soon…..