Dynasty Conspiracy Chapter 3: Invasion, a dynasty warriors fanfic

Disclaimer: If Dynasty Warriors were mine, I would give Sun Shang Xiang her old look back.

Kouri is happy, yes she is. Chapter writing seems to be progressing greatly. Actually, it's slowing now... but she's still full of ideas!

I'm not too happy with the beginning... I guess I just don't feel comfortable writing the Qiao sisters. This chapter was so hard to write. I forgot the presence of Zhou Tai until close to the end and had to write him in. Does it show?

Last thing (I promise): Word. Patching on Ragnarok Online sucks. And the Fanfiction Word Editor is on crack... I changed the section dividers to full stops, for better looks, and they got erased -.-

Chapter 3 – Invasion: Get Yer Hat On And Fight Like A Man!

"I can't wait to get to dinner!" Xiao Qiao announced to her sister as she skipped across the halls of Jian Ye palace, on her way to the banquet hall. "I hear that they have stuffed goose on today! I can almost smell it from here!" the younger Qiao exclaimed as her steps quickened. Then she slowed down again. "I only wish that Zhouie was here to enjoy it with me..." she added, slightly down now. Ever since his departure, she had been able to do nothing but worry about him. Da Qiao and Lu Meng had advised her to relax and enjoy herself, and she did, but she couldn't help but think of her husband every once in a while...

"Oh!" the girl caught herself as her sister gave her only a half-smile in return. "Sorry, sis! Really I am! I'm really sorry!" It had not been smart to talk about her husband when Da Qiao had none to talk about...

Da Qiao gave her a bigger smile in return, although it was still tinged with the shadow of pain. "Don't worry about it, Xiao Qiao. I ought to be putting Ce behind me. Of course I will never marry again, to honour his memory," this was strongly emphasised, "but I have to continue living life. He'd want it that way." They continued walking, and it was a while before Da Qiao spoke again.

"I think," she finally said as they approached the banquet hall, "that I will take part in the next campaign." Despite not having participated in any campaigns since her husband's death, her tone was firm, and she was determined.

"Follow General Xiahou Dun, you idiot!" A harsh whisper.

"I don't know which one he is!" came the replying protest.

"Oh for God's sake... if you can't see the eyepatch, or the great big sword, identify him by his horse!"

"I don't know which one his horse is yet!"

"Oh for God's sake..."

"I'm serious! I'm new, remember?"

"Oh for God's sake... General Xiahou Dun's horse is dun coloured. He always goes on about how his horse is dun, like him!"

"...oh for God's sake..."

While this urgent and yet rather silly conversation was taking place in the behind ranks of the marching blue army, Xiahou Dun at the front was polishing his sword as his magnificent dun steed plodded along the 5-hour journey to Jian Ye.

"Their guard is down, and they've been partying all these months," cackled Xun Yu sidling up next to him. "It will be an easy takeover, especially with the backup Lord Cao Cao promises us!"

To this, Xiahou Dun only replied with a nod, but Zhang Liao said warningly, "While the odds are in our favour, Xun Yu, we mustn't underestimate our enemy." Giving a small snicker, he added, "Who's to say that the Wu haven't developed an immunity to what partying does to your fighting?"

"Do you have the secret weapon ready, Zhang Liao?" Yu Jin asked him, and Zhang Liao nodded, but gave a snort.

"I don't see why we have to call it our 'secret weapon'..." he mused as the dark outline of Jian Ye got closer and closer. "I mean, we've only used this tactic like a million times. It's the time we use it, and not the method, that will actually be surprising the enemy after all."

Xiahou Dun suddenly stopped. "This would be a great spot," he said, "to launch it."

"You think?" Zhang Liao echoed, pulling the reins of his horse and coming to a stop next to him. "I suppose it's the right distance. I don't understand why we're attacking at dinnertime, though. Wouldn't it be better to wait until nightfall?"

"This is why I am the commander for this attack," Xiahou Dun said, almost wanting to make an eye joke, but deciding in the end not to (thank God). "Obviously, during dinnertime those Wus will be partying and drinking so hard, they can barely stand. Why attack at night, when sentries are more alert than usual, and shoot at the slightest movement, when we can just decimate one room now and wipe out half the generals of Wu?" He dismounted and headed towards the giant catapult; their (not so) 'secret weapon'.

"Where's the stone?" Xiahou Dun asked, and in a few minutes said stone was wheeled before him. Xiahou Dun ran a finger across it; its surface was smooth, and it had been whittled to form the shape of a spike so that maximum impact would be achieved.

"Launch it now, General?" the eager soldier asked. "Everybody is ready to charge."

Pensively, Xiahou Dun stared at the dark castle just under half a mile away, before making his decision.

"Yes," he said. "Do it."

"THAT WAS A GREAT ONE!" Han Dang laughed and patted Lu Meng on the back, his face red from all the alcohol he had consumed. "You don't look it, Meng, but you can be funny, when you want to be!"

Lu Meng winced as Han Dang's hand touched a raw injury that he had sustained the previous campaign. "Thanks," he said shortly, and left it at that. Zhou Tai glanced at them briefly, with an expression of someone who did not know what to say, so he didn't.

"Don'sh be sho harsh, Dang!" Xiao Qiao on the other hand admonished him cutely, devouring her goose drumstick at the same time. Coming from such a childlike woman whose mouth was full, making her words poorly formed, however, made it lose much of its effect, though, and Lu Meng sighed, but nodded to the young lady in thanks. Han Dang was just about to continue, when suddenly two scouts rushed into the room.

"Generals! Wei soldiers have been spotted half a mile away!"

"What?!" Lu Meng exclaimed and the mood changed in an instant. "How could they have been overlooked until they've come so perilously close?" To say that he was annoyed was an understatement, a very gross one. To communicate his anger even more, he got up and slammed his hands on the table, before making his way over to the scout to talk with him more, and that was what saved his life.

The wall behind his seat splintered, and everybody in the castle could literally feel its foundations shake. From the sound of it, bricks had started to fall apart on the floors below which were luckily and conveniently the dungeons, which no one cared about anyway. The dungeons were currently empty, and its walls were extra fortified and underground to boot, so a little bit of enemy siege would do it no harm.

The dining hall was another matter. Cheng Pu had been sitting next to Lu Meng but now all you could see amongst the debris of the polished stone, bricks, dust and food was his arms. It had not been a pretty way to go. Everyone else had thankfully jumped out of the way in time, though, and were momentarily struck, stunned.

Lu Meng gave a small growl of frustration. "It's begun," he said and, falling back on instinct, immediately started to bark out orders. He was the most senior one out of the generals, after all. Grabbing his weapon (since good generals never let them leave their sides!), he barked out, "Xiao Qiao, lend Da Qiao a fan for now. You there, go get General Da Qiao's fans!" he ordered some random foot soldier, who immediately saluted and did as he was told. All of a sudden, the castle exploded in a bustle of activity as Pan Zhang and Han Dang grabbed their halberds just leaning idly aside, and Da Qiao accepted a fan from her sister. Zhou Tai had already run ahead of the others to the main gate, tachi in its hilt at his side. Soldiers followed him to defend the main gate; archers to the top of the castle to take their positions and rain fire. You could hear the rumble of the Wei charge. Soon, the battering ram would be used, and they had only the time in which the door remained closed to prepare.

"Hurry!" Lu Meng urged. "To the main gate! I hope the defenders in the towers know what to do..."

"Name and address please," an old man in white robes, with a sharp nose and tiny, owlish spectacles intoned clearly and slowly, as if he had said it a million times before. Which he probably had.

"Name and address please," the man repeated, as Cheng Pu stared at him incredulously, and then at himself, prodding his body, which was amazingly still intact after the rock had hit his spine, in wonder.

"Name and address please." The man's voice now held an edge to it, which meant that all sympathy was over. Cheng Pu was dead, and he would have to deal with it, or at least stop thinking about it until later, when he was no longer taking up this man's time.

"Ch-Cheng Pu of Wu. Do you mean my hometown or residence?" Cheng Pu blurted out, intimidated by the man.

But he was cut off by the sudden sigh given off by the man. "Another one, huh..." he mused, twirling his pencil and marking Cheng Pu down as what suspiciously looked like 'war dead (Three Kingdoms)'. The general did not like just being made a mere statistic, but at any rate was forced to stay quiet as the man continued talking.

"You guys get a special realm all to yourself," the man said resignedly. "Although, that is quickly getting overcrowded too... Oh well, it's not my problem I suppose. Please step this way."

He gestured to the side, and a door appeared out of nowhere, shimmering almost in an ethereal fashion. Cheng Pu stared at it dubiously, and stepped just a fraction of an inch closer to it. Hardly fast enough for the man's tastes. Quickly as Red Hare's dash, the light from the door extended towards him, and he disappeared, before he had a chance to react.

The old secretary sighed.

"Nine hundred and thirty-seven thousand, three hundred and sixty-eight more applications to go..." he mumbled to himself in a motivational manner.

"I did it! I killed Xun You!" Xiao Qiao cheered, and did a little victory jig on the battlefield, seemingly oblivious of the carnage surrounding her. The soldier had returned, and had dutifully handed Da Qiao her fans, before going off to rejoin the fight. Da Qiao had accepted her weapons gracefully and had tried very hard not to think of his eventual fate.

Somehow, the castle had resisted the initial Wei charge, and although they were still being pushed back, it was at a snail's pace. Da Qiao certainly hoped that their efforts would give the reinforcements time to arrive... but now, she was not thinking of such things, as her mind was occupied primarily by the instinct to survive and it was all she could do to hold a conversation and fight at the same time.

"No you didn't, I'm fighting him now!" she pointed out loudly to her sister, and blocked a blow with the metal part of her fan. She may have been in mortal danger, but she was still as patient towards her sister as ever.

"Yeah, don't confuse me with that sneaky pig!" Xun You said indignantly, his sword coming from behind Da Qiao to strike at her ribs. Da Qiao easily evaded it with a twist of her lithe body however, and brought the fan down on her enemy with a thwack, stunning him.

"That's Xun Yu you're fighting, sis!" Xiao Qiao insisted, fighting her way through a mob of enemy soldiers. Her movements were quick and dainty, as if she had been mincing her way along the dance floor instead, but soldiers who were fooled by her appearance certainly did not live long enough to regret it.

"No, it isn't!" Xun You roared. "Xun Yu is a short, shrimpy, cowardly character! And he's right there!" Xun You used his armour to block a blow from Da Qiao, whilst gesticulating furiously at their topic of conversation's corpse, so that Xiao Qiao could see that he was no such man.

"Yeah... that's Xun Yu," Da Qiao agreed mildly, in the middle of her dance of death. She and Xun You had separated, and they were now dealing blows onto their respective enemy foot soldiers. "At least we agree on one thing, General."

"Hmph," Xun You huffed as he was forced into a corner. "Unfortunately," he replied with a snarl, bashing away at the soldiers. He kept looking up, Da Qiao noted, as if he was actively seeking out, or waiting for something. However, she tossed that thought aside, and focused on decimating as many Wei troops as possible.

All of a sudden, Xun You nodded and gave a large whistle. "Retreat!" he called, even though his side was neither tired nor losing. And, even stranger, the soldiers immediately stopped fighting and followed him as they travelled back to where they had come from. No one had complained about the mistake of leaving such an easy target behind to regroup. All around the castle the Wei forces withdrew unexplainably, leaving Jian Ye Castle with a collective 'Huh?' hung over its head. Not that they were complaining.

"All right!" Xiao Qiao cheered. "We won! I'll get him!" She was about ready to do so, when Da Qiao stopped her.

"Don't chase him, Xiao Qiao. For all we know he might be leading you into a trap. We can't afford to lose you, especially when only so few generals defend the castle. Cheng Pu was first, and I don't want you to be next. Let's go back to the castle... Lu Meng may have something to say."

As it turned out, Lu Meng did. He had been reading about strategies to withstand a siege when the two sisters appeared, and looked up at them. His wound had reopened and a couple of servants were bandaging it. The warrior turned strategist looked tired, and Da Qiao certainly didn't blame him.

"They found Han Dang's body near the moats," he said. "Pan Zhang and Zhou Tai got back safely."

"Oh," Da Qiao said, swallowing. She didn't know what else to say after that; she had never really talked to Han Dang and they had viewed each other only as fellow generals fighting under the same emperor. She knew that despite his feigned annoyance towards the man, however, Han Dang had been a great friend of Lu Meng. They hadn't had a chance to talk in a long time and Lu Meng had viewed his recovery time as an opportunity to catch up with his old friend.

Then the attack had come, of course.

"I'm sorry for your loss," Da Qiao said quietly.

"He was a great person!" Xiao Qiao chimed in as well. "We have to give him a great, fun burial." She said this solemnly, but her childlike innocence was still there.

"Yeah..." Lu Meng echoed tiredly. Then, he straightened himself up. "Pan Zhang, Zhou Tai, come here," he said sharply, very unlike himself now. "We need to talk about tactics."

On the table was a map of Jian Ye, and Lu Meng pointed to the various locations as he spoke.

"It's just the five of us now, defending this castle," he said, giving them a slight grimace. "We must not fail Lord Sun Quan, and must keep this castle, even if it is at the cost of our own lives. The good thing is that for now, it is an even match. I counted five generals; five against five is fair enough.

"I have checked our supplies of fuel, arrows, weapons and food," Lu Meng continued. "We have one week's supply; and that will be enough. It will be," he insisted, half to convince the others, and half to convince himself. "And now here is what I want each of you to do. We will defend the castle.

"I will guard the main castle doors with Zhou Tai." Lu Meng's index finger hovered about the bridge and the moat. "Pan Zhang, you will provide backup to anyone who needs it, but you will start off also defending the main gate. Da Qiao and Xiao Qiao, you will defend the flanks of the castle, in the gardens. If an attack from behind us does occur, I want you to address it immediately. Don't stray out of the castle boundaries, though," he warned. "I have stationed archers to shoot at those outside our walls. Most of the fighting will be done in the courtyards, gardens and hallways, but I know you can do it. We cannot chase them," he stressed. "We simply do not have the manpower. For now, our primary concern is to stop the enemy from entering the inner castle, and that is all we shall do."

"Lord Lu Meng!" a scout broke in, respectfully and yet urgently. Lu Meng immediately knew that yet more bad news was coming and massaged his temples.

"What is it?" he asked, almost afraid to hear the answer.

"We have detected a backup force from the Wei country three miles away," the scout reported breathlessly. "They will most certainly meet up with the Wei camp by sunrise."

"Aww!" Pan Zhang snarled, frustrated. Defending one on one would be easy, but if they were outnumbered it would be so much harder. "Don't you ever give good news every once in a while, scout?!" he demanded, slamming his fist on the table. "How big are the reinforcements?"

"Actually, with all due respect sir, I do," the scout deadpanned. "Lord Sun Quan's campaign party is close and will be here by tomorrow noon. We met up with one of their scouts," he explained to the suddenly considerably more alert generals. "As for the Wei reinforcements, we estimate them to be a little more than five hundred in size, sir!"

"Thank you," Lu Meng said, and cast a glance at the taciturn Zhou Tai. Nobody knew much about this man, who preferred to be alone. All Lu Meng knew was that this was the general that Sun Quan held in the highest regard, and Lu Meng hoped that Zhou Tai had the skills to back up that honour. He'd heard that Zhou Tai had been a pirate, like Gan Ning; but unlike Gan Ning, this man was just about as social as a brick.

"We will wait for Lord Sun Quan," Lu Meng said by way of conclusion. "Even if it makes it seven against five, we will hold on until reinforcements arrive!"

"Yeah..." the generals chorused in a collectively tired unison, since it seemed like the right thing to do.

"Remember, no chasing, and no one is to get into the inner parts of the castle," Lu Meng warned as the generals prepared for battle, having been rudely awakened by the persistent sound of a battering ram. "Positions, everyone!" he ordered, and then headed with Zhou Tai to the main gate. The generals were cranky from lack of sleep and breakfast, and it showed. Xiao Qiao and Da Qiao fought more vehemently, no longer with the grace and finesse of last night, and Lu Meng and Zhou Tai simply adopted the 'beat anyone in their way up' approach. Pan Zhang had had a huge amount to drink to ward off his frustration, and was currently practicing his version of the Drunken Fist, but with his halberd of course.

Upon their arrival, Dian Wei and Xu Huang looked up from opposite sides of the battlefield. Dian Wei was attacking the castle from the left, while Xu Huang, backed up by Xun You, was attacking from the right.

"So, our meat has come, huh?" Dian Wei sniggered softly. "I wonder which unfortunate soul it is, that I'll be fighting?" he continued to himself as he bludgeoned a couple more Wu guards, and they didn't even have enough time to protest before sinking to the ground. Xu Huang, on the other hand, did not say anything; he didn't have to, as his sword did the talking, while his white turban billowed in the wind. Xun You fought next to him, and the two generals were currently back to back, defending each other at the archway of the entrance to the gardens.

Xiao Qiao stared at the two men as she and her lady guard ran towards them, her mind already thinking of ways to beat them. She had never fought two men at once before, but Zhouie had, and he had talked about how you attack one side mercilessly. Xun You seemed weaker than the turbaned guy, so all she had to do was to snare him away –

Xun You turned towards the reinforcement platoon running at him and grinned sadistically at the young girl.

"Oh, it's you again, little girl?" he said brassily. "Imagine what Zhou Yu will say when I take his wife!"

"The only things that are getting taken around here are your lives! Just because we're women doesn't mean we can't fight!" Xiao Qiao shouted loudly, and charged with her lady guard towards the two generals, and the battle of the sexes, or should I say the battle of the Xs, begun.

Meanwhile, Da Qiao was facing problems of her own. One literally huge problem, actually: Dian Wei. She'd heard that he was slow, but she could see none of that slowness as he bludgeoned the castle guard mercilessly, and they crumpled like paper dolls. She herself was feeling a little uneasy at having to duel him just when she'd started to pick up her fans again.

"Da Qiao, I'm – hic – here!" Pan Zhang called, jolting her from her thoughts, as, brandishing his weapon, he charged into the fray, swaying a little as he went.

"Pan Zhang!" Da Qiao said gratefully as she snapped out of her small reverie, and followed him. "How are Lu Meng and Zhou Tai doing?" she asked him urgently, backing him up much like Xun You was doing to Xu Huang.

"They're okay!" Pan Zhang shouted back, spinning his halberd about so fast that Da Qiao had to step back. "They asked me to come here! Lu Meng thought you could need some help."

"I do hate to interrupt your conversation," Dian Wei sneered from next to them. "But I have something to offer you!" A swing of his axe followed this statement and Da Qiao found herself regretfully having to refuse it. Sometimes being small and quick had its advantages after all. Pan Zhang's state of half-drunkenness meant that he managed to dodge the blow as well, and the two leapt away from each other and turned to face Dian Wei, who laughed.

"Is this the way it's going to play?" he asked them tauntingly. "Never mind, I can take on two at once!" With astonishing speed, he flew at Da Qiao. She did not escape fully unscathed, as although she had escaped the killer axe she had been knocked to a side by his sheer body weight. It was from the ground that she saw Pan Zhang get jumped by five enemy soldiers, as she struggled to get up. ("Son of a–!" Pan Zhang swore, the curses escaping from his mouth very unexpected from his noble and studious appearance. But then again, his being dead drunk, and everything else actually, about Pan Zhang was unexpected.)

Dian Wei had seemed to decide that Da Qiao was not a threat, as he was now heading towards Pan Zhang, instead of finishing her off. "Pan Zhang!" Da Qiao yelled in warning as she saw this, as Pan Zhang's back was turned due to him fending off the five soldiers. His long, lithe frame danced about, blocking and thrusting, whilst his beautiful long hair floated about and glowed in the sunlight. He was utterly unaware of Dian Wei approaching.

Da Qiao was too late, as with a quick movement, Dian Wei sliced Pan Zhang's head, along with a fair bit of hair, off. Pan Zhang's now short-haired head fell to the ground and, as with the other victims of Dian Wei's axe, he didn't even have enough time to react. Wiping his axe on Pan Zhang's robes, Dian Wei glanced mockingly at Da Qiao, as if blaming her for her comrade's death, raised his arm, and declared, "Pan Zhang has fallen to my ax-"

But suddenly there was a quick movement, and Dian Wei's soldiers stared as their general stiffened, before turning around, revealing an arrow sticking out of his back. Behind him was the shadow of a large red mass.

And Da Qiao's breath hitched, she wondered if it was a dream. For she was seeing Sun Ce, her Sun Ce, looking utterly unsurprised at being alive, more handsome than ever before; coming to their rescue.

Man. That was a monster of a chapter...

About the battle of the Xs... I had to do it. It was begging to be pointed out. I couldn't find a way to incorporate the whole. 'Da Qiao vs Dian Wei', double D thing though. I thought a bra cup size joke would be inappropriate...

Please read and review... although you've read already... whatever.. xD