Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto!!!
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"YES! MORE LETTERS!" Naruto yelled as he grabbed one and began reading.
Hi! im the #1 fan here! im only gonna give guestions to Naruto's group 4 2day, k?
Naruto- i no u want a question so here it is! hav u ever been bungy jumping? ( couldnt think of a better question. it was random ) Sakura- y do u like sasuke? well ur gonna have to cry urself a river, build urself a bridge, and get over him!( u 2 Ino!!)who would u marry if sasuke didnt exist? Sasuke- y wont u go out w/ Sakura? (just curious) ttys! bye!! -Sarafina, ur #1 fan!
"YES! SHE ASKED ME A QUESTION! AND SHE'S MY NUMBER 1 FAN! THANK YOU! THAT MEANS SO MUCH!" Naruto screamed at the top of his lungs, almost deafening everyone in the room.
"STOP SCREAMING, YOU BAKA!" Kiba yelled.
"I don't think she was saying she was your number 1 fan Naruto. She was saying she was mine!" Ino said happily, "I mean, who wouldn't want to be my number one fan?"
"NO WAY INO-PIG! She's my number one fan!" Sakura yelled.
"She wasn't talking about any of us! She was talking about the voice that controls my life!" Sasuke said. Everyone looked at Sasuke like he was crazy. "What?" he asked them.
Pooh Bear Is My Hero: That's right, she was talking about ME! Not ALL OF YOU! Thank you for being my number one fan (throws 3 cookies to Sarafina)
"I still think she meant she was my number one fan," Naruto grumbled.
"Whatever dobe, just answer the damn question," Sasuke said, annoyed that hew as stuck with all these people he hated.
"Oh, right! No, I have never been bungee jumping. But I have jumped off of a cliff without a bungee cord! Does that count? Actually, Jiraiya pushed me off. But that counts, right?
"Did someone say my name?" Jiraiya said as he walked in the room and closed the door behind him.
"There was a door there?" Shino asked.
"OPEN IT AND LET'S LEAVE!" Neji yelled. Sasuke, Neji, and Gaara ran over to try and open the door for they were the ones who wanted to leave the most, but the couldn't get it open.
"NO! We're stuck here forever! Doomed to an eternity with...with...LEE! NOOOOOOO!" Neji yelled as his worst nightmare of being stuck with Lee forever came true right before his eyes.
"DO NOT WORRY MY ETERNAL RIVAL! We will live here in peace and harmony FOREVER!" Lee announced.
"Dear god, why do this to me?" Neji yelled to the ceiling.
"Hey, there aren't any girls in here!" Jiraiya said.
"Hello? I'm right here! I'm a girl!" Sakura said.
"Yeah, but you're flat chested, that blonde one from Konoha is a bitch, the Hyuuga girl NEVER and I mean NEVER shows any skin, the blonde girl from the Sand Village will knock me out with her fan if I go near her, and the girl with buns on her head is a master of WEAPONS! I doubt I'll be able to go near her, either." Jiraiya said as he sat down, depressed.
"HEY!" Sakura and Ino yelled at the same time.
"Shut up, I want to get these questions over with. Can we please continue?" Sasuke asked, very annoyed with the situation at hand.
"Yes Sasuke-kun!" Ino and Sakura said simultaneously.
"Sakura, the next one's for you," Kankuro said.
"Oh, let's see... why do I like Sasuke-kun?" Sakura began, "Because he's PERFECT! He's everything a man should be! He's strong, hot, smart, hot, sophisticated, hot, talented, hot-,"
"An asshole," Naruto put in.
"An asshole," Sakura said, not paying attention for she was daydreaming about her and Sasuke, "And, HEY! NARUTO! Don't do that!" Naruto just snickered from where he was at but was quickly punched in the head by an angry Sakura.
"Anyway," Sakura said, "If I didn't marry Sasuke, which I DEFINITELY will-," Sakura was cut off by Ino yelling, "ONLY IN YOUR DREAMS FOREHEAD GIRL!"
"Anyway, as I was saying, if by some chance I didn't marry Sasuke, I would probably marry...(sigh) Naruto," Sakura finished.
"Well maybe since you're so mean to me then I won't want to go out with you anymore. Then who would it be?" Naruto asked. He was curious who was in the line up for Sakura's heart.
"I guess...based on who I think would be able to take care of me the best, it would be...oh god, Lee." Sakura said, really hoping it wouldn't come to that one day.
"I am sorry Sakura! But I am not sure if I would want to marry you! My flame of youth burns for someone else now! You've rejected me so many times, that I have decided that it was never meant to be for us so I am going to get out of the way and let you and Sasuke be!" Lee announced.
"Thanks Lee!" Sakura said with a huge smile on her face.
"YES! One less person for me to beat out for your heart Sakura!" Naruto yelled.
"But, Naruto, I thought you liked Hinata?" Sakura asked. Naruto blushed and looked away from Sakura. "Umm...lets go to the next question!" Naruto suggested, "I think it's for you, Sasuke."
"Oh joy," Sasuke said sarcastically.
"Wait, so what is this supposed to be? Are you all answering fan mail or something?" Jiraiya asked.
"Wow. You're slow, aren't you?" Neji asked.
"We're answering questions people ask us perverted sage!" Naruto yelled.
"What's the question I get to answer?" Jiraiya asked.
"No one asked you a question yet," Chouji said.
"BUT I WANT TO ANSWER A QUESTION!" Jiraiya yelled.
"Now we know where Naruto gets it from," Shino thought out loud.
"Perverted sage, we need Sasuke to answer his question, so shut up!" Naruto yelled.
"Okay, what's the question? Hmm, why won't I go out with Sakura? Well let me ask you a question, Sarafina. If you were me would you want to go out with a girl who yelled "SASUKE-KUN every five seconds while you were on a mission? Or would you want to go out with someone who stalks you, like Sakura does me? That's why I won't go out with Sakura: because she is annoying and a stalker." Sasuke finished.
"But...Sasuke-kun-," "THERE YOU GO AGAIN WITH THAT 'SASUKE-KUN'! That's all I ever hear from you is Sasuke-kun, Sasuke-kun, Sasuke-kun, Sasuke-kun, Sasuke-kun! Can you say anything else?" Sasuke said, cutting off Sakura.
"But...Sasuke-kun," "AAARRRRGGGGGHHHHHHH!" Sasuke yelled after Sakura had said his name AGAIN.
"Okay, let's just move on to the next letter," Tenten said.
"Oh, oh, I shall read it Tenten!" Lee yelled as he took the letter from Tenten and read it aloud.
Yo, Konoha crew! Sand sibs too! I've got a few questions for you. (Wow, that rhymes.)
Temari: Why do you want to kill Ino? Kasek P.S. You guys are doing a surprisingly good job, considering that you are all stuffed in a room with people you don't like for who knows how long.
Sakura: What makes you so sure Sasuke will fall in love with you?
Hinata: Do you have a crush? If so, who? You don't have to answer if you don't want to...
Sasuke: Have you gone to a psychiatrist recently? Cause I think you should...
Naruto: I dare you not to answer anymore questions this session, if there are any more.
"YES! Someone understands my pain of being stuck with all of you people who I hate!" Sasuke said.
"Wow, that person really did rhyme! They could be a rapper!" Naruto pointed out.
"I guess Naruto hasn't noticed the dare to him yet," Tenten whispered to Lee, "Otherwise, he'd be freaking out."
And as Tenten said, Naruto started screaming at the top of his lungs when he read the letter himself.
"NOOOOOOOO! WHY DO THIS TO ME KASEK? You have deprived me of all that is FUN! HOW COULD YOU!?!?!?!" Naruto yelled.
"I wish he would have dared Naruto to stop talking instead for the rest of the session!" Kiba complained, covering his ears.
"NARUTO, SHUT UP!" Jiraiya yelled, whacking Naruto in the head, "Temari, I think you're first."
"Oh, umm...I really don't want to answer this one, so could you ask a different one some other time maybe?" Temari asked, blushing a bit.
"I HAD TO ANSWER WHAT THE MEANING OF CHEESE WAS AND MY TEDDY WAS REVEALED TO THE WORLD! I THINK YOU CAN MANAGE TO ANSWER THIS ONE TEMARI!" Gaara yelled at his sister.
"Just answer it Temari," Kankuro added.
"Oh, fine! Well, the reason I'm mad at Ino is because she was...you know...kind of, sort of, flirting with Shikamaru!" Temari stated, a blush completely covering her face.
"So what if I am?" Ino asked.
"SHIKAMARU IS MINE! Besides, you like Sasuke anyway!" Temari yelled.
"You don't own him! I can flirt with him if I want! He's my teammate! And I can like two people at once if I want!" Ino yelled. Luckily Shikamaru heard none of this for he was too busy sleeping. No wonder he hasn't said a thing this whole chapter...
"That's it! You're going down bitch!" Ino yelled to Temari.
"Bring it on Barbie Girl!" Temari yelled as she pounced on Ino and they began wrestling on the ground.
"Now all we need is some mud!" Jiraiya yelled, "Can we place bets, 'cause I'm betting the girl from the sand village kicks that Yamanaka's ass!"
"God, you're more perverted than Kakashi!" Sakura yelled.
With that Kakashi walked in the door as well and closed it behind him as he came in.
"KAKASHI SENSEI! Why are you here?" Naruto yelled.
"I heard there was a new set of Icha Icha books here." Kakashi said, "What's going on in here?"
"Well, Temari and Ino are wrestling to decide who gets Shikamaru. Before that we were answering questions that people were asking us. I'm not allowed to answer anymore for this session," Naruto informed Kakashi.
"Kakashi, can you get us out of here?" Sasuke asked.
"Sorry, can't do that. Gai's right outside and if I leave he'll follow me everywhere.
Gai must have sensed Kakashi was in the room, so he came barging in as well.
"DON'T CLOSE THE-," Neji and Sasuke began to yell to Gai. "Door," they finished after Gai had already closed it.
"Ah, here you are my eternal rival!" Gai exclaimed.
"Okay, I'm leaving now," Kakashi said as he headed to the door and attempted to open it, but nothing worked. "CHIDORI!" Kakashi yelled, but that didn't work either.
"Kakashi! I challenge you to a battle!" Gai yelled.
"No," Kakashi said, "you guys just go ahead and answer the rest of these questions now so I can leave, okay?"
"Questions? What questions? And why are Ino and Temari of the sand wrestling on the floor. And, LEE!!!!!" Gai yelled.
"Gai-sensei! You are here as well!" Lee exclaimed.
"So I am Lee. So I am." Gai stated, "What is going on in here Lee?"
"Ino and Temari are fighting over Shikamaru and everyone is answering questions that people ask us!" Lee yelled.
"THAT'S IT! That is the challenge!" Gai yelled youthfully.
"To fight over who wins Shikamaru's heart?" Kakashi asked, confused.
"NO! Whoever answers the most questions will be the winner! The score is 50-50 right now, so whoever wins this will be the overall champion!" Gai exclaimed, giving the nice guy pose.
"Fine, whatever," Kakashi said as he broke up the fight between Ino and Temari.
"Kakashi, what are you doing! It was just getting good!" Jiraiya yelled.
"I just want to finish these damn questions so I can leave. Now lets go! Who's next?" Kakashi asked.
"I think it's Sakura," Tenten said.
"TENTEN! Do not help your sensei's rival! It is unyouthful!" Gai said.
"But, he just asked who was next," Tenten said.
"I SAID DO NOT HELP TENTEN!" Gai yelled.
"Sakura, please, just go," Kakashi said, very quickly getting annoyed by Gai.
"Ok, well Kasek, I think Sasuke will fall in love with me because he will come to see what a wonderful person I am and he will see he can't live without me because I have a lot to offer him! And I can help him rebuild his clan!" Sakura said, blushing at her last comment.
"EWW YOU AND SASUKE HAVE KIDS! EWWW!" Naruto yelled.
"Naruto, shut up and lets get to the next question. WHO THE HELL IS NEXT?" Kakashi asked, getting very impatient.
"I-I am," Hinata said quietly.
"Okay then. Go Hinata," Kakashi said, trying to stay calm with the timid girl.
"Well, K-Kasek, I k-kind of h-have a c-c-crush on t-two p-people n-now," Hinata began. She moved away from everyone so her back was facing them and whispered so no one could hear her, "N-Naruto-kun and I have a s-small c-crush on K-Kiba-kun, b-believe it or n-n-not."
"What did you say Hinata?" Naruto asked.
"I-I said I d-didn't w-want t-to t-tell t-t-them who I l-liked," Hinata told everyone.
"Okay, next!" Kakashi ordered.
"SASUKE! YOUR TURN!" Naruto yelled.
"All right, all right. Let's see...a psychiatrist? Why do I need to see one of those? I DON'T HAVE A PROBLEM!" Sasuke yelled.
Pooh Bear Is My Hero: Yes you do
"SHUT UP!" Sasuke yelled as he looked at the ceiling.
"Sasuke, who are you talking to?" Kakashi asked his student.
"The voice who controls my life that only I can hear!" Sasuke informed Kakashi.
"Maybe that Kasek is on to something with having Sasuke see a psychiatrist," Kakashi said to himself.
"Okay, let's read another letter!" Ino suggested. Temari just glared at her as Ino got another letter and read it out loud.
Okay this ones for Gaara:
Does your teddy have a name? Oh, and if it does what is it? Reiko-chan-
"Gaara, tell them the name of your bear," Temari said.
"His name is Mr. Shjadkfkls," Gaara said in a low whisper.
"Gaara, we can't understand you because you're talking too low!" Temari told her brother.
"HIS NAME IS MR. SNUGGLES BECAUSE HE IS CUDDLY AND FUN TO SNUGGLE WITH!" Gaara yelled out. Everyone backed slowly away from Gaara.
"Let's just drop the subject and move onto our next question," Kakashi suggested. Everyone else nodded their heads in agreement.
Ok I have a Q. for: Lucy
Naruto and Sasuke, how did the two of you feel when you two accidentally kissed each other.
Gaara, why don't you just buy a new teddy bear or just kill Temire well she is sleeping.
Neji, have you ever used the byakugan to look in to the girls locker room before, either by accident or on purpose.
PS
I love all you guys
"I'd rather not talk about this, can we move on please?" Sasuke said, a bit uneasy.
"Fine, if you won't talk about it then I will! Lucy, it was the most-" Naruto was cut off by Kiba yelling, "YOU WERE DARED NOT TO ANSWER MORE QUESTIONS, REMEMBER?"
"Dammit. Sasuke, tell them how horribly it was!" Naruto said.
"Umm...well...you see...it was...horrible and disgusting?" Sasuke said uneasily.
"Exactly!" Naruto said, nodding his head, "Gaara, you're next!"
"Lucy, I can't buy a new teddy bear because I have had it ever since I was little and it is the only thing that has ever loved me. IT IS MY MR. SNUGGLES AND I WILL NEVER GET RID OF IT!" Gaara stated, "Also I can't kill Temari while she's sleeping because she hides my bear somewhere on her person and I can't risk destroying my bear."
"Okay. Neji, it's your turn," Kakashi stated.
"Of course I've never peeked in the girl's locker room before! I'm not a pervert!" Neji stated.
"But what about that time I saw you in the baths looking at women with your Byakugan, Neji?" Jiraiya asked.
"She said LOCKER ROOMS not BATHS!" Neji yelled.
"NEJI! How could you do such an unyouthful act! I am ashamed to call you my pupil! As of now, I only have two students! How could you do this to me Neji? I can no longer talk to you!" Gai said as he turned away from Neji.
"Hey, could you teach me how to get Gai to never talk to me, too?" Kakashi asked Neji.
"Well that's all the time we have for today!" Kankuro said.
"Please ask any questions you want, and we'll answer them no matter what!" Tenten said.
"ASK ME A QUESTION! Come on, you know you want to!" Jiraoya said.
"NO, ME ME ME ME ME!" Naruto screamed.
"Kakashi! I will beat you in our challenge by getting more questions than you and answering more than you! The power of youth will help me!" Gai yelled.
"Yeah, okay, whatever," Kakashi said as he read is book.
"CURSE YOU AND YOUR HIPNESS KAKASHI!" Gai yelled, "WE SHALL SEE WHO COMES OUT ON TOP TOMORROW!"
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Yay, more characters to torture with questions! Yay! Hope you enjoyed this chapter! Depending on if I get enough questions or not, the next one may be up today!
Pooh Bear Is My Hero