Here is the second chapter of the story. Sorry for taking so long, but some essays wanted to be written at home. Now enjoy the chapter and I would be glad about some reviews.

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2. chapter „How to be lost": "Impressions"

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Brian Spence "My arms are strong"

Come to me my darling child.
Is the world upsetting you
I'll hold you in my arms a while
Nothings so bad
Don't you know that I will protect you?
Some have let you down I know
No one hurts like friends
So wear my love like winter clothes
And weather the storm
And weather the winter again and again
My arms are strong, I will carry you home forever
My arms are strong, I will carry you home forever
And if you find one day you're just not feeling right
And if you wake up and you just can't sleep at night
And if you turn around and no one's there, no one's there
I'll be yours
Forever and ever
Nothing's so bad
Don't you know I will protect you?

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When Martin came home, he looked in on his daughter first. The door to her room was closed, only a dim light shone through the door. Quietly he opened it and pushed himself into the room. Allie seemed asleep and lay on her back. Her hands still held her drawing-book. Her head was slightly bent to the side, her blond hair with the blue strands held together with a hair band. Martin bent over his daughter and took the book carefully out of her hand. Then he kissed her cheek and his hair tickled his chin. Martin breathed in deeply and smelled the scent of her peppermint shampoo. As quiet as possible he left the room and closed the door behind him and then went to his own bedroom.

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The doorbell rang and Martin was sure it was Jack, it was. Martin let him in and they sat down on the couch in the living room.

"You know, I have to talk with your daughter. Elena and Danny went to the old house this afternoon looking for evidence."

When Elena landed, the impact took her breath away – just as the pain in her ribs when Danny hit her. She heard a crash, looked up and saw a falling board hit the edge of the hole. It cut two more boards and all fell towards them.

"Be careful!" Elena cried and pulled Danny aside. It was in the nick of time, because a few seconds later the board hit the ground.

"Thanks for saving my life." He said hoarsely.

"I wouldn't do this for everyone." The dark-haired woman laughed and leaned back with exhaustion.

After a few minutes to catch their breath they both got carefully back on their feet.

"Nothing broken so far?" Danny asked Elena.

"Beside some bruises I'm okay. Let us see, if we find some traces of the running person."

"Are you sure you saw something. It was dark and maybe…"

"Of course was there someone. I know what I have seen. Come on!" Elena defended herself.

A noise caused the two agents to turn around; there stood someone in the shadow of the corridor. One moment the person stood still, before he disappeared quickly behind the corner on the right side. Elena started to run with Danny hard on her heels. When they came around the corner, both agents ran through the corridor following his grey light. Then there was another corridor and it seemed that they were imprisoned in a labyrinth. They passed a few cupboards, boards and chests until they reached a window opening without glass. Breathlessly Elena climbed out of the window and jumped to the ground.

Far in the distance she could see the person in a dark sweater and hood who ran along at the wire fence until he reached a building site. Only a few cars were on the streets. The person wriggled over the fence and came down on the road, before he began to run again.

"Are they okay?" Martin asked dismayed.

"Yes, they are okay – well, beside a few bruises, but the person escaped. That's why we don't know if the unknown has something to do with the disappearance of Cindy Petersen. I really would like to speak with Allisone."

"I know." Martin sighed. "But I'm not sure if she will talk to you. She doesn't trust strangers, especially adults."

The older agent nodded.

"Sure, but, Martin, I…" Jack stopped and Martin followed his glance.

In the door stood Allisone in jeans, a blue top and arm warmers from her wrists to her elbows in the same colour as her top. She had blue ribbons tied in her very fair hair.

"Jack, this is my daughter, Allisone."

The young girl come closer and greeted Jack.

"Nice to meet you. Do you feel better?"

She only nodded and sat down beside her father.

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Allie sat in the armchair and stared at the screen of the TV. Her father's boss had left more than a half hour ago and since that time it was calm in the apartment. Only a floor lamp in the corner the gentle light illuminated the bookshelves. Outside raindrops gently splashed against the window, but the young girl ignored all of this so lost in her thoughts. When Martin stepped out of the kitchen, he stopped at the door to the living room and saw his daughter. She seemed so serious and sat in such a dignified posture, like a bishop of the middle Ages. She was quieter in the evening as usual, and while he stood there thinking about her Allie looked up. Her face brightened and she smiled at him. He shook his finger playfully at Allisone upon which she rolled her eyes. Martin went into his bedroom and closed his door. The dark was pleasant to him, no lamp lit up the room and he fell on the bed.

"Allisone, I want talk to you about Cindy Petersen. She disappeared yesterday evening and her parents are worried about her. Maybe you can tell me where she could be or what could happen to her. I know you both met in the evening. Is there anything that you want to tell me?" Jack asked and looked into her eyes. The girl avoided his glance and instead she stared on her hands.

"Cindy and I were in the cinema, but then she got bored and told me that there was something she wanted to show me. But I really don't know what happened to her, I swear!"

"But what have you both done in that old villa?"

At this question she has a look at her father. He didn't know she was in that dilapidated house and had endangered her life. She should be more responsible or she would live with her grandparents, since this was not an option for her, Allie decided to lie.

"Nothing. I thought it was better to walk home when she showed me the house. It didn't look really safe. Can I go now? I'm tired and would like to go to bed."

Allie didn't wait for an answer but as she stood Martin gripped her wrist causing his daughter to turn towards him. Wordlessly they looked each other full in the face until Allie shook her head and walked away. Jack noticed the scene but didn't say a word until Allie was gone.

"I know she is your daughter although I didn't know you had a daughter and I really don't know why she lives with you now and not the whole four years. You haven't said one word about her mother, her past, but I know she didn't tell me the truth about yesterday evening. If she doesn't tell the truth she could have problems."

"As you said, Allie is my daughter and what happened to her it's none of your business. You don't speak alone with her. She's only eleven years old. You understand me, Jack? If you don't mind I want you to go."

Jack looked at him and sighed. He had known this could be problematic. Beside Martin was the son of the FBI vice-director.

"You know what happen if the girl is hurt or something else and your daughter has something to do with it. I only want to protect her, but in this way I don't know how. If she wants to say what really happened, you know where you can find me."

Both men stood up and Martin let him out. When Martin was alone, he leaned against the door and sunk to the floor. He put his head on his knees and sat still for more than half an hour.

Unnoticed by Martin Allie came out of her room, she had eavesdropped on the discussion between the two men. Allie wanted to go to her father, embrace him and say she was sorry, but she couldn't. Allie felt worse than ever and began to cry. Inside she felt torn and lonely; she didn't want everything to go wrong! Fleeing back into her room she lay down on her bed allowing the softness of the blanked under her cheek to absorb her tears.

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Martin must have fallen asleep because when he sat up in his bed with a jerk everything was quiet. When he had a look at his watch it was already after one o'clock. Martin lay back but it was impossible for him to put to sleep, so he decided to run to clear his head.

"Daddy?" Allisone called timidly for him when he went to open the door. So he came into her room.

She sat in the dark and was drinking out of her small water bottle.

"What's wrong with you, sweetie? A bad dream?"

Allie shook her head and continued to drink. But she had a frightened face, breathed heavily and had called for him in the night. Her dream was bad. Allie stopped drinking and closed the bottle and lay down.

"Dad…"

"I'm here."

His daughter sat up again and switched on her blue star on the bedside. Suddenly she threw herself into her father's arms. Martin kissed her hair, her forehead. Allie shoulders were trembling and although he cannot feel the tears through his sweater he knows they are there. Allie put her head at Martin's neck and now he could feel the warm tears. He embraced her more firmly and after a few minutes she didn't tremble any longer. He put one of his fingers under her chin and forced her to look up. Her eyes are red and puffy, but her look was similar like her mother years ago.

"Everything is okay!"

"Where are you going?"

"When?"

"A short while ago!"

"When you called me?"

"Yes, where are you going?"

"No where, Allie." And Martin stroked his hand gently over her hair and smiled at her. "It was only a bad dream," he said. "Lie down and sleep now."

She lay down.

"That seemed not like a dream." She whispered.

"Bad dreams didn't seem to one as if", Martin said. "And when you wake up they disappear. Should I stay until you are asleep?"

He already knows the answer.

Her head sank slowly on the cushion, the blanket pulled up to her chest. She gripped her old bear Willi. Martin kissed her cheek and gently stroked her hair. He noticed that Allie was tired and soon would fall asleep.

"I don't go anywhere, you already know that…"

Obviously relieved Allie closed her eyes and slowly began to fall asleep, with the certainty that her father surely would be there if a nightmare would jerk her up.

The roads are wet. It's muggy and the scent of heat rises from the tar. One morning. Mummy sleeps, her long blond hair is spread over the pillow, and the door is open. Dad is in the kitchen and prepares breakfast. They are my true parents, but it seems from another life, in which I don't belong any longer. The table in the kitchen is set with spoons and blue dishes and bowls. The water for tea begins to gurgle, two pieces of toasts jump out of the toaster. The newspaper lies between the orange juice and the milk, the voice of Joe Cocker sings on the radio.

I sleep and two persons lay beside me. They smell like apple pie. I'm in a warm and comfortable room. Outside it rains. I'm longing desperately for these two people. Although Emma and Ted assured that I'm their biological child and I'm imagining these things. But I hear these two people breathe. I can close my eyes and feel them beside me. I want to open my eyes, to see who lay beside me, but I'm too afraid. I'm paralysed.

And so I lay there in the night. I do not belong here and I'm not Julie Michaels. I'm somebody else and somewhere another life waits for my return.