Chapter Three: Promises

A/N: You guys are seriously the best! So, this was the original epilogue, but I'm going to make it the third chapter and post an actual epilogue later this week as per all your requests!

Enjoy!

Sam stared at her pale reflection in the mirror; she really ought to get some sun, she looked more ghost than human. Felt more ghost too. She had been wandering around the halls of the SGC for what felt like forever, when in reality it had only been two or so weeks. She'd been in the infirmary for half that, only managing to convince Janet to let her go when she promised to stay on base for the next few days.

That was fine, she couldn't have faced going home anyway.

She couldn't put her finger on it, but something was terribly, horribly wrong and she was afraid that if she left…whatever tether she had left to this place would be severed forever. Maybe it was post-traumatic stress or maybe it was some side effect of having been trapped in mass of wires and screens, but she just wanted to be around people.

So why was it that everyone seemed to be avoiding her?

Daniel and Teal'c had been okay for the most part. Teal'c was his usual stalwart self, but she knew he was watching her more closely than usual, stepping protectively close whenever a machine beeped loudly and Sam froze before remembering that she was out—that she was fine.

Daniel watched her like a hawk, hardly leaving her alone to pee by herself. He had long since run out of excuses to come by her lab—"Sam, did you see the artifact SG-4 brought back…" or "Hey, Sam, I really need a lunch break, but I know I'll only go if someone makes me…" It seemed he had now contentedly settled for taking up a mostly permanent residence in the corner of her lab, dry pages of some ancient manuscript the only sound in the room.

She made sounds of annoyance and protests, but secretly, she was glad for both of them. And she knew they knew that. So she continued to hem and haw and they continued to show up unannounced and stay well after social norms dictated they were welcome. And she loved them for it.

But she felt guilty for it too.

If they were spending so much time with her, who was checking on the colonel? He needed the support arguably much more than she did. But, after her own failed attempts to reach him, she figured that her two friends weren't having much more luck than she was. He had shut himself away; close enough to touch, but far enough that no one could reach him.

And that made her angry. Didn't she, at least, deserve a window into his sulking? Hadn't she spent the last five years following that man to the edges of the universe and back? Hadn't she done enough to earn at least a modicum of support from him? To give a modicum of support to him?

When Sam reached her lab, she was mildly disappointed that the corner she had recently deemed "Daniel's" was empty. Usually he was there before her—a gesture which she had become immensely grateful for. In all her time at the SGC she had rarely been left alone in her lab for more than a few hours at a time; the colonel was always pestering her about something.

But she missed the pestering. She missed the inevitability of his presence. It almost felt like he was the one who'd gone away, except this time…they might not get him back.

"Hey." The soft greeting startled her and Sam whirled around, heart slamming against her ribs.

"Hey." She smiled at the man lounging against her doorframe. "I was wondering if you'd decided I was rehabilitated enough to be on my own."

Daniel smiled warmly, but something flitted just beyond his expression. It was gone before Sam could read it. "Not quite." He didn't move to enter her lab and Sam found that that made her nervous. "I just got off the phone with General Hammond. He wants us back on the rotation starting Monday."

Sam could tell her was watching her closely, looking for any indication that it was a rushed decision, that she wasn't ready to get back to work, but she couldn't have been more ready. She had had it just about up to there with everyone mother-henning her; especially the colonel. When she'd heard that he'd requested indefinite downtime on her account, she had balked. It had taken both Teal'c and Daniel to distract her enough not to seek out her CO in resentment.

"Great!" And she meant it. "That gives me just enough time to finish up my report on the particulate manipulator SG-6 brought in and-,"

"You're not staying on base this weekend, Sam." His voice was quiet, but something forceful wove its way between his words and Sam fought the completely ridiculous urge to back up.

"I'm not?" Quirking an eyebrow she tried to remember what she would have done in this situation Before. Sam had told herself a hundred times that she was no different today than she was last month, last year…and she wasn't entirely wrong. But everyone was just watching her so closely, she felt pressured to behave in exactly the way she would have before the entity.

Except she couldn't really remember that person anymore.

"No. Teal'c and I think you need some…time. A couple of days away from the base and we'll all be ready for Monday." Daniel shoved his hands into his pockets as he surveyed her.

"All?" This whole thing suddenly felt very suspect. Why was he behaving so oddly?

Daniel didn't respond right away. He gave her a funny little smile and shook his head, then backed out of the doorway. "We'll come by and get you in an hour. Do you have clothes on base or do we have to stop by your house?"

"I have some here." Her voice sounded distant to her own ears, like she was talking underwater. She watched him nod and disappear from her vision altogether, the only proof he'd been there the fading footsteps in the hallway.

He seemed so…sad. Sad? No, that wasn't it. He was…muted. Like all of the color and life that made him him had been tamped down. Looking around her empty lab, Sam decided that it felt colder and more vast than the loneliest iceberg in the furthest sea. It was good that she was leaving the base.

Belatedly, Sam realized that that had probably been Daniel's intention all along.

…..

Sam had figured out what that little niggle of suspicion was as they reached the surface. Neither Daniel nor Teal'c had mentioned the colonel at all and had only looked at her questioningly when she'd hesitated in front of his locker.

Her suspicions were confirmed when they stepped into the waning sunlight and saw the missing man dawdling by his truck, wearing jeans and a leather jacket. The sight of him standing backlit by the sun wearing such familiar clothing hit Sam with such an unexpected nostalgic longing that even her teeth tingled.

When was the last time she had seen him?

And then the last piece of the puzzle clicked into place, the piece that she'd blinded herself to…he had been avoiding her. And she'd let him do it.

His eyes were guarded as they approached and Sam knew immediately that this hadn't been his idea. Usually, he was the first person to suggest a team night, knowing that at least half of his team responded better after a tough mission when they weren't left to brood. He himself would never admit it, but after a mission gone bad he preferred keeping them all together where he could see them…where he could instantly know that they were all okay just by glancing up.

Not this time apparently.

"Daniel, Teal'c." His eyes flicked over her face before he greeted her. "Carter." His expression was shuttered, but his tone betrayed none of the apprehension he felt. "They kidnap you too?"

"It would seem that way, yes, sir." Sam tried to smile, but her chest hurt too much. She could remember being in the dark, hearing his voice, hearing his anger…she had shouted out to him, desperately screaming his name…

The slam of a car door snapped her back to reality and Sam took a deep, shuddering breath trying to ignore the slick feeling of sweat that had suddenly slithered over her skin. "Sam?" Daniel touched her arm lightly and Sam nearly jumped, only stopping herself as a wave of nausea slammed over her.

"I'm fine. I'm okay." In the greatest effort of her recent memory, Sam smiled earnestly at her friend, wiping all traces of her near panic attack from her face and posture an instant later. "I think all this fresh air is making me light headed."

Daniel smiled at her weak joke, but seemed to take her at face value. Teal'c did too, if his slight head incline and move towards the truck meant anything. But as he and Daniel got themselves situated in the car, her eyes found her colonel's and she knew that he didn't believe her façade for one second.

The moment seemed to last an eternity, both officers on the precipice of saying something- teetering on the edge between silence and need- but before either one could open their mouth, Daniel slammed his door shut just a little harder than was necessary.

…

When they arrived at Jack's house, Sam took her time getting out of the car. The colonel and Teal'c, who'd been sitting up front, were the first ones out and up the walk to the front door. His house had an expectant air to it, like no one had been in it for a long time.

Daniel watched Sam as she unbuckled her seat belt and wrapped pale fingers around the strap of her overnight bag. She wasn't moving slowly or laboriously, but Daniel could feel the waves of effort coming off of her. They should have done this sooner. He and Teal'c had decided to let their two hurting friends try to come to terms with their respective ordeals on their own, but they'd sat idly by too long.

"We were thinking pizza." His voice sounded unnaturally loud in the cab of the truck.

"No anchovies." Sam immediately responded, shooting him a sharp look as he raised his hands in surrender. As she hopped out of the car and ambled casually up towards the door, Daniel couldn't help but wonder if he was reading too much into things. That little exchange had seemed very normal.

Could it be that he was overreacting?

But as he opened his own door he watched how both Sam and Jack took a small step away from each other as she entered his house.

….

"Oh, absolutely not. You cannot blame me for that." Daniel placed his beer back on the table, probably a little harder than he would have if he had been completely sober.

"Daniel, they told you that those ruins were off limits. You were the one who decided that that meant everyone except you." Sam shook her head, remembering the three mile trip back to the gate at a dead run after that little "misunderstanding."

"Well, they never specifically said I couldn't go."

"They definitely did." Sam snagged the last piece of sausage and pepperoni as she rolled her eyes.

"I concur with Major Carter. The natives specifically instructed that no one was to enter the ruins under any circumstance." Teal'c lifted a skeptical eyebrow without looking away from the movie currently playing on the TV.

"Traitor." Daniel shot at the older man.

"Sir, did you want to split this?" Sam held out the slice she'd recently acquired. "Sir?" When he didn't respond she reached out with her socked foot, brushing her toes against his ankle. Alcohol and laziness had made her slightly more comfortable than she'd expected she could be, but the realization that she desperately wanted things to go back to the way they were before had overruled any last boundaries.

The second she made contact, he stiffened like he'd been electrocuted. His hand jerked and the beer he'd been nursing all night slipped from his startled fingers and fell to the carpet with a soft thud.

"I'm sorry!" Sam felt her cheeks heat as she unceremoniously shoved the pizza back into the box and jumped to her feet. "I'll get a towel."

Without waiting for a response, she hurried off towards the kitchen in search of a dish rag. Jack watched her go then glanced down at the growing wet spot blooming on his carpet. If nothing else, he figured he probably should've had more than two sips the whole night. Not that he really cared about the carpet, it had seen worse.

"Wait, Carter, I'll get it." He wasn't even sure he'd spoken loud enough for her to hear, but he stood to follow her nonetheless. As he passed Daniel, the younger man's arm shot out and he halted Jack before he could leave the living room.

"You aren't holding up your end of the deal, Jack."

"I didn't make a deal with you, Daniel."

"You need to talk to her."

"You need to cut back on the beer."

Daniel pressed his lips into a thin, angry line, but let the other man go. Looking at Teal'c, he found the big man already watching him. "Nothing will be solved in this manner, Daniel Jackson."

"I'm not really sure what else to do, aside from locking them in a room and throwing away the key." Daniel leaned back on the couch cushions and watched the movie without really seeing it.

"Perhaps things will resolve themselves in time. Once we have returned to a normal routine." Teal'c followed Daniel's sightline, but he also wasn't paying the film any attention.

"Maybe. But come Monday, whether they're ready for it or not, they'll have to at least pretend that everything is fine."

Whatever Teal'c had been going to say was silenced by the return of the silent colonel and his major.

…..

Sam stared up at the ceiling, the occasional shadow flitting across the dark expanse made her heart jump and her breath catch. She was regretting her decision to sleep on the couch. She should have taken Daniel up on his offer to share the guestbed, but she had been too afraid of having a nightmare and Daniel witnessing just how not fine she was at night.

So Teal'c had retired to the bedroom turned office, Daniel had gone to the guestroom, and the colonel had closed himself away in his room long before the other three had been ready for sleep. Now here she was, sprawled on a couch that shouldn't have felt as familiar as it did, watching the moon track its way across the ceiling. It had to be at least four in the morning, but she didn't feel the least bit tired.

She briefly considered putting on her shoes, writing a note, and just walking home. She didn't live that far and she was sure the atmosphere in the house would be lighter at breakfast if she wasn't there. She could count on one hand the amount of times the colonel had looked at her all night and when she'd touched him…

Well. That could have gone better.

Pressing her hands to her face, she tried to erase her mind entirely. If she was going to get any sleep, she had to at least try not to think.

"You're dwelling." His soft voice nearly brought a scream to her throat as she sat bolt upright and turned to look behind her. How could she not have heard him?

He was leaning against the half-wall that lead from his hallway into his living room, hands in the pockets of his flannel bottoms, and his loose shirt wrinkled from lying down. His hair was sticking up in complete defiance of gravity and for some reason that made Sam's chest really hurt. A lump was forming in her throat and, as hard as she swallowed to make it go away, it really hurt too.

"Dwelling, sir?" She was proud that her voice came out strong and not broken.

He tapped the side of his head with one finger before shoving his hand back into his pocket. "I can hear you thinking all the way down the hall."

Irrationally, Sam apologized. "I'm sorry, sir. I'll, uh, try to keep it down."

He nodded and turned away, disappearing back into the darkness and leaving Sam to flop back onto the cushions, cheeks coloring. She didn't know what she'd been expecting, but an admonishment for something that clearly wasn't possible certainly wasn't it. She'd been hoping that maybe that had been his way to open up a dialogue or…or something, at least…

The quiet creak of a floorboard had her sitting up again. She turned to look at the hallway just as her colonel reappeared wearing a sweatshirt and carrying a second one in his outstretched hand. Silently, Sam stood and took the proffered garment, pulling it over her head with the slightly giddy realization that he had worn the jacket recently; it still smelled like him.

Neither said a word as he led her out onto the back porch and then up the ladder and onto his roof. As she padded along behind him, she couldn't help but look up at the glittering expanse of sky above her. She had seen so many different skies, but Earth's was still her favorite. Still looking up, Sam didn't notice that the man in front of her had stopped until she bumped into him, her chin digging softly into his back.

"Sorry, sir." Sam stepped back, voice heavy with embarrassment.

He turned to look down at her upturned face, standing close enough that their breaths mingled between them. "Generally, when one is on a roof, one should look to see where they're going." But there was no reprimand in his voice.

Sam looked into his eyes under than blanket of stars and felt gratitude burst in her heart. He was joking with her. Sam scrunched her nose and only barely managed to tone down her smile before it blinded him. "Yes, sir."

He opened his mouth like he was going to say something, but at the last second seemed to decide against it. Instead, he jerked his chin to the right and stepped aside so she could move to sit in front of the telescope.

Sam hesitated for a second before settling herself right where she was, crossing her legs and looking up to see what his reaction would be. There was only one chair in front of the telescope and Sam didn't want any excuse to be on a different plain from him again. His face was unreadable as he sat down next to her, settling his back against the low railing that ran around this section of his roof.

Together they sat in silence for a long time; long enough for the black in the sky to grow deeper as the constellations faded into their death throes just before dawn. A decidedly dewy chill had taken possession of the air, but Sam was quite content where she was with her—his—sweatshirt wrapped tightly around her and the heat from his body radiating towards her from where he sat just a tad too close.

When the first rays of the purple and gold dawn streaked across the sky, he turned his head to look at her. For the first time since she'd left the mountain, she looked completely at relaxed. Her breathing was deep and even and the smallest smile kissed the corners of her mouth as she watched the sunrise. Jack felt something he had no right to feel stir deep within his chest; reaching out for the woman sitting next to him yet knowing that he shouldn't.

"C'mere." His quiet request sent goosebumps rushing over her skin.

Scooting across the few short inches separating them, Sam leaned against his side as he settled his arm around her shoulders, pulling her in closer when she hesitated; debating how much of her weight she should put on him. She knew they shouldn't be doing this, extenuating circumstances aside.

But right now she couldn't bring herself to care. There was not a single place in the entire universe that she would rather be and she'd be damned if she weren't going to enjoy every second of it.

Jack closed his eyes and let his cheek press against the top of her head as her hand slipped into the pocket of his pullover and rested lightly on his stomach. His heart clenched as the knots that had been mercilessly twisting in there finally loosened.

He had promised that he would never tell her just how much she meant to him, but he'd never been good with words anyway. As they sat on his roof, as close as they had ever been—both physically and figuratively—Jack knew they didn't need words. Not yet.

For now they could just be there and no one could touch them. Even as he held onto his tenuous first promise, a second one was being made.

One that he fully intended to keep.

END

A/N: Again, this was the third chapter ending in accordance with season four/five canon! If you like it ending here, I thank you so much for reading! If you want the epilogue—which will end either season five canon or season 8 sort of canon—please stay tuned! It'll be up later this week! Thank you guys so so much!