It had been over a week since Clarke had last seen Lexa – on her own that is. 10 days to be precise. 10 days since she had kissed the lecturer in her office. Lexa had been successful in avoiding her thus far, managing to escape the room before Clarke could even reach her. Instead, telling the students she would be happy to answer any questions they had relating to any of the lecture material over email.
Clarke wasn't stupid, she knew she couldn't just drop Lexa an email. "Oh hey, remember that kiss in your office? I'd love to try that again". But frankly, this was becoming aggravating. She wasn't used to being blown off, to being the one doing the chasing.
Every effort she made to talk to Lexa was unsuccessful and it was becoming frustrating. So much so, it was affecting her mood. Or so, that's what Octavia had kept making sure she knew about.
"Seriously Clarke, if you don't lighten the fuck up soon I'm going to throw a lamp at you" Octavia declared from their seat within the cafeteria.
"Clever, O" Clarke responded sarcastically, glaring at her so-called best friend.
"I'm tired of you being a moody bitch all the time. You practically nearly snapped that girl's wrist when she reached for the last snickers just then. And I mean don't get me wrong, I know you love your nuts but…" Octavia trailed off with the deadly glare Clarke sent her way, causing her to lift her hands in surrender, "wow okay, no nut jokes either? You're real fun lately"
Clarke let out a sigh, letting her fork fall from her hand, "I'm sorry, O. I don't know what's up with me lately, really."
Octavia looked at her in silence, her eyes searching Clarke's face, Clarke's eyes and the blonde quickly dropped eye contact. "Yeah sure, you don't know"
Clarke wanted to tell Octavia what had happened between Lexa and her but the lecturer had specifically asked her not to share the information. And with the way Lexa was already giving her the cold shoulder, telling her friend about the situation would only lead to an even colder shoulder. She couldn't risk that. Not when she was itching to talk to the brunette again.
"Honestly, you should just go and get laid already. Might stop you being so damn moody all the time" Octavia muttered, going back to eating her lunch.
"Did someone say they needed laid? Because I hear I'm great with my hands" both the girls looked up to see Echo wiggling her eyebrows at them. Echo who was supposed to be a one night stand of Octavia's and now a somewhat part of their small group of newly found friends. "I'm sure O could back me up on that"
Octavia nudged against Echo's shoulder as the girl sat beside her, across from Clarke, "wouldn't bet on it. Wasn't that memorable"
Echo clasped her hands over her heart in mock hurt, "you wound me, Blake. You cut me real deep"
"Plus it's not me that needs laid, it's miss moody pants over here" Octavia pointed her fork towards Clarke.
"I do not need laid, thank you very much" Clarke protested.
"We're students, Clarke, we always need laid" Echo declared which caused Octavia to shout a round of 'here here's in agreement.
Clarke pinched the bridge of her nose in frustration. She did need laid, but not by anyone. Going out and having a drunken one night stand wouldn't sustain her needs. Sleeping with a certain lecturer instead, now that is exactly what she needed. She needed to step up her game if she wanted that to happen again.
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Lexa was nearing the end of her second week of lecturing and although it had started off rocky, although she was convinced she was going to lose the job before she even truly started, all was going smoothly now. She had successfully avoided being alone with Clarke Griffin, knowing exactly what effects the blonde had on her whilst they were alone, in close proximity. What happened in her office was the perfect example of that and Lexa would do everything in her power not to allow that to happen again.
Yet she couldn't get the blonde out of her head. She didn't understand why she would catch herself thinking about her, even dreaming about her on occasion. The girl was just another stupid one night stand, something to blow off some steam with the stress of the new job looming over her. So why and how had the blonde somehow managed to occupy her thoughts so often. Lexa didn't even want to indulge herself in those questions, knowing it would only lead to thinking of the blonde more, and if anything what she needed was to somehow erase said blonde from her thoughts.
It was Thursday afternoon and with the absence of one of the lecturers within the psychology department, Lexa had taken on an extra seminar class in order to ensure students wouldn't miss out on any material. Checking her watch, she quickly grabbed the materials for said seminar and made her way to the class, skipping the elevators and opting for the stairs, knowing students would already be queueing up.
After quickly conquering the 6 flights of stairs with a handful of folders, Lexa managed to reach the class before any of the students. With a sigh of relief, she set down the folders and quickly moved over to the windows and opened them, relishing in the cool air that quickly rushed through them.
Students quickly began to file through the door not long after, not wasting any time in sitting down and taking out their notepads and pens. After she was sure most of the students had arrived, she set out the registration paper for all students to sign and proceeded to start the seminar class.
"As you may be aware, your regular tutor Harper is unfortunately unwell therefore I'll be taking over this seminar group until further notice. I'm sure most of you have already met me or at least attended my lecturers on cognitive psychology but if not, my name is Lexa Woods. You'll be able to find my email and office on your online space in case anyone has any questions for me or even just interested in some extra readings. As far as I'm aware, your last lecture for this module was on memory, am I correct?" Lexa looked around the room and saw a few students nod their head, "okay good. For today's seminar, we'll be doing a short memory test. But for this, I'm going to-"Lexa was interrupted for a moment when the door opened with a late-comer slipping into the room. On reflex, her head turned to welcome the student and her voice caught in her throat when she noticed the blonde hair. The blonde hair that was usually loose was now up in a messy bun, revealing the pale skin of her neck, accentuating that delicate jawline. Her mouth was dry.
"Sorry sorry, I got lost an-" Clarke began to mumble as she rushed through the door, stopping dead in her tracks when she noticed Lexa standing in front of the small class. "Oh" slipped through her lips and Lexa's heart began to race as those blue eyes found hers, definitely not helping with the saliva production. Why was her mouth so damn dry?
Regaining her thoughts, remembering where she was, Lexa quickly looked away from Clarke's pinning gaze and looked back towards the class, "please join the rest of the class" she spoke through the dryness, looking anywhere but the blonde. Clearing her throat, she lifted her chin and composed herself, "as I was saying, today we will be partaking in some very simple memory tests. Firstly, I'm going to need to split the class in two. Right side will be group 1, and the left side will be group 2. You will both be given different sets of paper, one will have a list of words and the other will have a number of pictures. This is to test whether you are able to remember more when you are faced with words or pictures."
Lexa proceeded to pass around the material needed for each group, and found herself locking eyes with the blonde again as she rounded her table. She didn't know if it was deliberate, if anything she was convinced it was, she knew how Clarke worked but as she passed Clarke her paper, the blonde's fingers brushed her own. The smile on Clarke's face answered her own question: deliberate.
Lexa went back to the front of the class, giving out instructions on how long everyone was allocated in order to remember objects. Once the class were distracted with their task, she risked a quick glance over at the blonde. Raking her eyes over the student, over the simple grey sweater that clung tightly to her body, the swell of breasts evident and difficult to look away. Over the lengths of legs that wore blue and ripped skinny jeans, when had such casual wear become so attractive? So… desirable? Her gaze lifted, taking the blonde in once more and finding those blue eyes staring back at her, that smirk that Lexa itched to wipe off her face once and for all aimed her way. Fuck.
"I think that's over the 3 minutes…" Clarke smirked at her and Lexa really wanted to do something about that smirk. That cocky smirk. She hated it. She hated how much she liked it, more like.
Lexa quickly blinked away and checked her watch. 4 minutes had passed. Great. "Yes, thank you for reminding me" she replied dryly, "if everyone could set their paper aside, where it is not eligible to look at. In a minute's time, you will be given a minute to write down as many things as you can recall"
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Clarke was having too much fun. Finding Lexa here in her seminar class was a surprise but a surprise she gladly welcomed. She had already caught the always so professional and formal lecturer practically undressing her with those green eyes, had already had her stumbling over her words whenever she herself had asked a question, she truly was having too much fun.
It also didn't hurt that Clarke practically had a front row seat to the masterpiece that was Lexa Woods. She could see the muscle in Lexa's jaw working overtime anytime the class was silent, participating in whatever boring memory task they were asked to do. No doubt having an internal battle with herself to keep her eyes off of Clarke, she had already caught her more than once sneaking peaks at frankly, inappropriate areas. Clarke had long ago given up on trying to remember whatever words or pictures she was asked to. Instead she focused on remembering the slope of Lexa's nose, the pout of her lips, the high cheekbones, and the strong line of her jaw. She focused on remembering the subtle hint of strong thighs beneath slim fitting black pants, the strong squaring of shoulders underneath a loose white blouse, sharp collarbones exposed from undone buttons. She focused on remembering Lexa.
With the clock nearing the end the seminar, Clarke knew she had to talk to Lexa. She was not going to allow this woman to slip away from her again and risk another 10 days of avoidance, of rejection. So when Lexa finally dismissed the class, when everyone – including Lexa – began to pack their things and made their way to the door, Clarke took her chance. She couldn't just ignore a student's request for help in such a small room.
"Lexa, could I ask you a few questions please?" Clarke quickly asked as she stood from her desk, loud enough for an almost retreating Lexa and the remaining students left to hear.
The brunette was like a deer in the headlights. Frozen in place, panic quickly passing over her face and eyes scanning for an escape. But with a slump of shoulders and a deep sigh, Clarke knew that she'd succeeding in getting her conversation with Lexa, "of course" the lecturer spoke, setting folders back down on the desk.
Clarke smiled brightly, picking her bag from the floor and slinging it over her shoulder, waiting for the last few students to pass by and leave before making her way over to Lexa. A desk separating them once again, it all felt too familiar. A pang of excitement coursed through her at the memory.
"What do you want, Clarke?" Lexa spoke, breaking through her daydream.
"I told you, I have a few questions"
"I'm assuming none of those questions are on your lecture material?"
"You're assuming correctly" Clarke tilted her head as she smirked at the brunette, watching those piercing green eyes. Lexa let out a sigh, pinching the bridge of her nose in frustration at the blonde.
"What do you want, Clarke?" she repeated, her tone anything but patient.
"Why are you avoiding me?" Straight to the point.
"I'm not avoiding you, Clarke. I'm busy. I don't have time to hang around and play your childish games after every lecture".
"Then can we meet? Somewhere that isn't here. I want to talk to you. I want to talk about this properly"
Lexa looked up from her hands at that question, studying Clarke and hardening her gaze as she replied, "this? I don't know what you're referring to because there's nothing to even discuss here, Miss Griffin"
Clarke knew she wasn't going to get anywhere with this, not whilst she was giving Lexa so much control over the conversation, so much control over herself. She took a step around the table, the déjà vu screaming in her head as the memory of Lexa's office came to the front of her mind. "Lexa" she spoke softly, watching as the brunette swallowed hard, those green eyes watching her every move. "You know there's something here" she gestured between them both, "and if we don't discuss it, if we don't acknowledge it, then it'll drive us both crazy"
She could practically see Lexa's brain working overtime as she thought over everything until she finally settled with a small nod, "what do you propose?"
"Tonight. There's a bar called Tingle, meet me there around 9?"
"A bar? Is that really a good idea?"
"What's wrong? Scared you won't be able to keep your hands to yourself?" Clarke winked.
Lexa let out a groan of frustration, gathering the folders off the desk and turning towards the door, "I'll see you tonight, Clarke" she simply stated as she walked away, leaving a very smug and giddy Clarke behind.
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"Wow wow wow, where are you going all dressed up and why wasn't I invited?" Octavia asked as she ate yet another bowl of cereal, bumping into Clarke making her way out of the bathroom.
"To meet a friend" Clarke spoke vaguely, trying to manoeuvre past Octavia in the narrow hallway, which was nothing less than unsuccessful as her best friend stepped from side to side to block her path.
"What friend?" Octavia questioned.
"Just a friend I know from one of my classes, now can I go please?"
The brunette patted the spoon to her chin, mimicking a thinking pose, "nope, not buying it, Griffin. Who are you meeting?"
"A friend, I told you!" Clarke lied again.
"You know it's a sin to lie to your best friend? Like I'm pretty sure it's the first commandment; thou shall not lieth to thy bestest friendth". Clarke couldn't even bring herself to reply, instead just aimed an eye roll in the direction of her seriously-reconsidering-it best friend. "You don't want to be upsetting God more than you already have, Griffin. You're already going to hell for all your sins. Who are you meeting?"
Clarke threw her hands up in frustration, "I can't tell you, okay?! I said I wouldn't tell anyone and that includes you, unfortunately. Now will you let me past so I can leave?" with another quick step to the side, Octavia blocked Clarke's pathway again, shoving the spoon in the blonde's face.
"Nuh uh, you are not going anywhere till you spill it. You can't drop that information on me then not tell me"
"O, really I can't tell you. Please, just let me leave"
"Clarke. Clarkey Clarkey, how long have we been best friends now?"
"9 years"
Octavia reached out and placed a hand on Clarke's shoulder, "9 years Clarke, and now you're keeping secrets from me? I can't allow it. I'm sorry Clarke but this friendship is built on trust, and of course how great and fun I am, but mostly trust. And right now, Clarke, you're not trusting me. Do you understand how that's dangerous?" Octavia had somehow taken on some sort of Godfather sounding accent by now and Clarke couldn't help but eye roll.
"What you going to do? Decapitate a horse and put its head in my bed if I don't tell you?" she countered.
"I do whatta gotta do" that damn accent continued.
Clarke sighed through a laugh, she knew she wasn't going to get away from this without giving her something, "okay, if I tell you who it is you have to let me leave and I promise to fill you in on the rest of the details later, deal?"
Octavia's face quickly split into a shit-eating grin as she enthusiastically began to nod her head, "deal"
"I'm meeting one of my lecturers, she's called Lexa and if I don't leave now I'm going to be late and I really need to talk to her so if you don't mind" she pushed past a now mouth gaping Octavia, grabbing her jacket from the improvised coat hanger and shrugged into it.
"YOUR LECTURER? What the fuck do you have going on, Clarke!" Octavia raised her voice.
"Nope. We had a deal. Later, O!" she called over her shoulder as she made her way out the apartment.
"Clarke Griffin!" she heard being shouted from behind the close door, causing her to laugh. She really didn't have the time to fill Octavia in on any of the details, she was already running late and leaving Lexa waiting any longer would be risking her leaving. She wouldn't get this opportunity again. Plus, she was sure Octavia would have plenty of questions for her to answer by the time she returned home. She was not looking forward to that interrogation.
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Lexa sat in a booth close to the bar, patiently waiting for Clarke to join her as she nursed a beer. Mostly twirling the bottle and tearing the wrapper than actually drinking the thing, she was particularly nervous. She quickly agreed to this meeting for the sake of clearing the air, for the sake of telling Clarke once and for all that this couldn't continue, won't continue. It gave Lexa the ability to speak freely to the blonde without any worries of being overheard or worse, caught in a situation similar to the last time Clarke was inside her office. No, even if drinking around Clarke or simply being around the girl was risky, it was the only solution in order to put a stop to this, once and for all.
Checking her watch, Clarke was already 15 minutes late. Honestly, this blonde was infuriating. Was she ever on time to anything? Lectures, seminars, and now this. If there was one thing Lexa had a pet peeve over, it was tardiness. How difficult could it be to arrive on time to meetings, meetings in which Clarke herself had set up? Infuriating.
Just as Lexa was about to leave, her patience quickly disappearing as it reached the 20 minute late mark, the blonde girl sighed loudly in front of the booth, catching Lexa's attention. When she looked up, she found a panting, red faced Clarke, chest heaving as she took in deep breaths and Lexa's gaze settled on the rise and fall of those breasts for longer than necessary. It didn't help that Clarke was wearing such a low cut top, cleavage almost spilling out with each heavy breath.
"I assume you'll take those as my apology for being late" Clarke teased, glancing down at her own breasts and making Lexa blush with being caught staring. Again.
"Can we just get this over with?" Lexa responded blandly, averting her eyes to the booth across from her.
Clarke slipped into the booth across from her, pushing some wayward strands of hair away from her face. "You don't waste any time, do you?"
"We're here to discuss what happened between us, are we not?"
"Can I at least get a drink first, Miss Woods?" Clarke teased, using the more formal name to address Lexa, causing the brunette to roll her eyes. A simple nod of permission and Clarke slipped out of the booth. Lexa took advantage of the lack of distraction to recollect her thoughts. She was here to put a stop to this, not to continue to ogle Clarke like a damn teenage boy. Honestly, what was wrong with her? Get it together, Lexa.
"So, where were we?" Clarke asked, slipping back into her seat and fixing Lexa with those captivating blue eyes as she used her tongue to guide the straw of her drink into her mouth. Keep it together, Lexa.
"You have to stop this, Clarke. You have to stop trying to pursue me, trying to get me on my own" Lexa declared.
"You had no issue with agreeing to meet me here, on our own tonight" Clarke tilted her head quizzically to the side.
God, this girl was frustrating. "I had to make it clear to you, once and for all that whatever you think is going to happen between us, will not". Clarke's lips split into a grin before she took the straw between those pink lips and continued to eye Lexa in silence. Lexa wouldn't allow the blonde to have the satisfaction of causing her to be the first to break eye contact, not again. She could see the challenge in Clarke's eyes, a blue glint that frustrated Lexa to no end. The blonde's tongue slide out and slowly licked along her bottom lip, and Lexa itched to watch it more closely instead of vaguely in her field of vision.
"I think I remember you saying something very similar to that last week, before you had me pinned against your desk"
"Last week was a mistake, an error of judgement. An error that won't happen again"
Clarke leaned back fully in her seat, stretching her arms behind her head and letting out a long breath, "I don't understand you, Lexa"
"What is there to not understand?"
Clarke pinned her with blue eyes, "there's something here, something that you can't keep fighting. I've seen you, Lexa, I've seen you watching me, I've seen you looking at me with that same look in your eyes I witnessed the first night we were together." Clarke leaned forward on the table, arms crossed and leaning on forearms, "why are you so adamant on denying yourself what you want?"
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Clarke watched as the gears in Lexa's head continued to turn, no doubt trying to come up with yet another attempt at trying to persuade her that this was never going to happen again. She could practically see the inner battle between giving into her desires and doing what she considered was right. Don't get Clarke wrong, she completely understood why Lexa didn't want to continue this, it was risky. Lexa could lose her job, lose her reputation as a lecturer all together and practically nail her own career coffin shut if they were to get caught. But that's just it, how would they get caught? It was just sex. It wasn't like Clarke was asking her to take her out on dates and show her off to the world.
Lexa let out an exasperated breath, catching Clarke's attention. "You're my student, Clarke. Don't you understand how badly this could end for me? I- I just can't risk it".
There it was, Lexa giving into that Angel on her shoulder. Clarke really wanted to shut that thing up. "Only if we get caught" she counter argued.
"Clarke" she could hear the pleading in Lexa's voice, and in any other circumstance she wouldn't push it. But she couldn't let this go, not when she could see how close Lexa was to giving in; not when she knew just how badly her body craved Lexa's.
"Please, Lexa", she reached across the table and placed her hand over Lexa's as it gripped her beer. "I can't explain this, or even understand why I can't let this go. All I know is I haven't stopped craving you since our first night together and seeing you practically every day… I can't get you out of my head".
Lexa stared at their joined hands, and when she finally looked up to meet her eyes, Clarke knew she had won. "You're resilient, you know that?"
Clarke smiled widely, "I just know what I want and I don't go down without a fight"
"What is it you want, Clarke?"
"I want you" Clarke's voice lowered, a husky tone taking over as she fixed Lexa with a hunger in her eyes.
She watched as those bright eyes turned dark, black taking over green and her nerves came alive at the change.
Suddenly, her hand was grabbed and she was being pulled out of the booth. A muttered "Fuck it" under Lexa's breath as the brunette led her out and away from the bar.