It had been good to see Harry for his birthday, but dinner had been filled with Molly simultaneously fussing over his shabby state and asking suspiciously pointed questions about Tonks, Remus escaped to Grimmauld Place. He wanted to leave a report for Dumbledore before heading home to his cottage. Living among his fellow werewolves was more difficult than he'd imagined. They didn't accept him, as he bore all the marks of having lived among wizards his whole life. Then again, he wasn't sure he wanted them to accept him, given the viciousness they'd adopted from Fenrir Greyback. He felt guilty, knowing how important it was to gain information, and to turn the werewolves to their side, but part of him felt that the Order would be much better off without these werewolves among them. But Dumbledore thought it worthwhile, so who was he to argue.

He'd just sealed his report for Dumbledore, and was preparing to leave, when he heard someone coming down the stairs. He looked up and saw it was Tonks, and his heart stopped at the sight of her. Her hair was that lovely light brown color, but her eyes were blood-shot and red. He wondered if he was the cause of that. Their eyes met and they froze for a moment, staring at one another, a thousand thoughts spinning through each of their heads. Tonks' expression was unreadable as she slowly climbed down the last few steps.

"Remus," she choked out, and suddenly flung herself at him.

Remus braced himself for her attack, but none came. She'd flung her arms around his neck and was clinging to him. Without thinking, Remus embraced her in return, burying his face in her hair, savoring her intoxicating scent of vanilla and jasmine. After a moment, Remus came to his senses and pulled away from her. Tonks' face showed nothing but the deepest hurt when Remus unwound her arms from his neck and gently separated them. Neither of them said a word, and Remus, feeling horribly guilty, turned to the door. His hand was on the doorknob when he heard her sob. The sound pulled at his heart, and he turned back to her.

"Tonks…" he said.

"I – I've been so w-worried about you, and scared for you!" Tonks sobbed.

"I'm fine," Remus replied. "I send reports every week…" He trailed off, seeing her sneer.

"Oh yes," Tonks snarled, allowing her anger to replace her distress. "Well, that makes it all okay, doesn't it? It's okay that you fucked me, then left me without even saying goodbye, because you send reports that I get to hear secondhand."

"I left you a note," Remus said, feeling abashed. He'd never seen her so angry, though he knew he deserved every bit of her anger.

"That's right, you left me a note full of your oh-so-noble assumptions about what's good for me. News flash, Remus: I. AM. NOT. A. CHILD." Tonks shoved him backwards. "I know what I want and need a whole hell of a lot better than you do! And I don't need you looking out for my safety either. I'm an Auror, and damn good one at that! I fight dark magic every day, I can handle myself when I'm in danger, not that you've ever put me in danger of any kind!"

Remus had stumbled back when she'd shoved him. He didn't know what to say; he thought she'd be angry at him for taking advantage of her, but she seemed to be more enraged by his note that the events of that night they'd spend together.

"I came on to you that night; I'd wanted you for a long time. Still do, for that matter. But you're too busy being noble to consider that maybe, just maybe, I know what I'm a big girl and I know what I'm doing," she finished.

Remus's guilt turned to anger at these words. "I'm not noble," he spat. "I've explained my reasons for my actions. I'm sorry if you won't accept them. Now, I only have tonight off, so if you don't mind, I'll be leaving." Remus spun on his heel and walked out the door, slamming it behind him.

XXXXXXXXXXXX

Two hours later, Remus was still pacing the floor of his small cottage, fuming at Tonks' reaction. He'd explained everything in his letter, how could she think he was just being noble? Couldn't she see how much he cared for her? He'd hardly stopped thinking about her since that night. He admitted to himself that that could be contributing to his failure to insinuate himself into the werewolves' society, if you could call it that. He seemed to be failing everyone these days. He hadn't kept Sirius from going the Department of Mysteries, he was failing at the mission Dumbledore had given him, and he'd made Tonks so angry that she seemed to hate him now. His heart ached at the thought that she hated him. He could hardly bring himself to admit it, but he thought, perhaps, he might be falling in love with her. He hated himself for the way he'd spoken to her, she had every right to be angry with him, he should have apologized.

There was a tap on the door and Remus was jerked out of his thoughts. He whipped his wand out of his pocket and pointed it at the door.

"Who's there?" he shouted.

"Remus, it's me."

He heard Tonks voice and his pulse quickened. He only hoped she wasn't here to continue their row. He opened the door and saw her standing on his doorstep, looking sheepish. He stepped aside and motioned her in. She hurried inside and stood awkwardly as he locked the door with his wand.

When Remus turned to her, she was shivering. He hadn't noticed how chilly it was; he pointed his wand at the fireplace and a fire instantly started warming the room. Tonks was looking around, taking in his tiny home. Remus was embarrassed at the size and lack of furnishings, but at least it was clean and tidy.

"What are you doing here, Tonks?" he asked apprehensively.

"I came to apologize. I shouldn't have flown of the handle at you that way. I know you did what you thought was best, I've just been so scared for you. I can't seem to control my emotions."

"Why are you so scared for me? I'm not inept, you know. I can take care of myself, just like you." Remus tried not to let himself feel hopeful that she might really care for him. He stepped closer to her as he spoke. "What aren't you saying?"

Tonks looked up at him and said quietly, "Remus, I care for you. I – I think I'm falling in love with you."

At these words, Remus' heart soared. He pushed aside his thoughts telling him it was wrong, and took her lovely face in his hands. He pressed his lips against hers in a kiss that spread warmth through his whole body. He pulled away to look her in the eyes and whispered, "I think I'm falling for you as well."

Tonks eyes lit up and a sweet smile spread across her face. She was filled with want for him, but felt timid, possibly for the first time in her life.

"Tonks, I can't offer you anything. I have to return to spying tomorrow, and I don't know when I'll be able to get away again. I still think you deserve someone who can give you more, someone who can give you everything. I'm too old, too poor –"

Tonks cut him off with a kiss. Then she murmured, "I'm not asking for everything, just give us tonight, Remus." She pressed her body against his and Remus winced in pain as she pressed against his fresh wounds from this month's transformation. The full moon had been only three nights before, and his self-inflicted scratches were still tender.

Tonks had seen him wince and asked, "What's wrong?" Her voice was full of concern.

"It's nothing," Remus replied, and tried to distract her with another kiss.

Tonks wouldn't be distracted. Before Remus could protest, she lifted his shirt to expose his raw, scratched torso.

"Remus!" Tonks exclaimed. "Is it – is it like this every month?"

Remus shrugged. "It's not always this bad, but sometimes it's worse."

"Come on," Tonks said, and took his hand. She led him to the bathroom and started filling the tub with hot water.

"Tonks, you don't have to do this," Remus said.

"Yes I do, now get your clothes off or I'll do it for you," she replied.

Remus sighed, then gingerly removed his shirt. He toed off his shoes and pulled his trousers and socks off. Tonks was rummaging in his medicine cabinet and pulled out a bottle of essence of murtlap. She added several drops to the rapidly filling bathtub, muttering to herself as she did. She turned to face him and her eyes filled with tears at the sight of his ravaged body. She turned away quickly, replaced the murtlap essence, and turned off the tap.

"You'll need to take those off too, you know," she said, indicating his boxers. A slight smirk played at the corners of her mouth.

Remus rolled his eyes, but pushed his boxers over his hips, and they fell down to the floor. Tonks' eyes flew to his cock which grew hard as Remus watched her lick her lips. Remus crossed the bathroom in two steps and stood right in front of her, their bodies almost touching. He could hear her breath quicken.

"Are you sure I need a bath, or is there something more pressing we should be doing?" Remus murmured.

He watched Tonks hesitate, then she shook her head. "Get in that tub," she ordered him. "I'll be right back."

He stepped into the tub, winced at the heat of the water, and eased himself down to recline in the tub. He sighed in relief as the murtlap essence pulled the pain out of the tender wounds on his chest and the hot water soothed his aching muscles. He closed his eyes and allowed himself to relax for the first time in weeks.