Wow was he wrong.
Kurt doesn't start out being wrong.
Neither Santana nor Rachel ever verbally tell him he has to sleep in his own bed a couple of days later, but he's positive they're thinking it, and so he tells them he's fine and returns to his own room three days after he and Adam break it off.
He busies himself more than ever with school, and Vogue, and housework, and watching out for Pezberry because someone still has to. He is insistent upon that. Firmly believes it.
Yes, Kurt knows that both young women are capable, and strong, and independent in their own right, but, well, if nobody wants him as a boyfriend, at least he's wanted as a best friend/roommate/cook/maid(Santana doesn't get the coffee maker turned on for her for a week for that one). It's enough. Sorta.
Has to be for now, Kurt tells himself. And almost believes it.
But he sees his roommates cuddling, and stealing kisses whether he's watching or not and…
He won't pretend it doesn't hurt somehow.
The problem is that… well… he isn't exactly sure how it hurts.
Kurt knows how it's supposed to hurt. He should feel envious. Should feel jealous of their relationship. And yet… Why does a part of him, waaaaay in the back of his head, keep telling him that he's actually jealous of them?
That is wrong in so many ways he cannot even begin to explain it.
So Kurt does what he's always done when he's faced something that is too scary and terrifying and confusing for him to handle alone.
He calls his dad.
"Dad, I have a problem," are the first words Burt Hummel hears when he picks up the phone. Followed by; "I'm not sure if I'm 100% gay anymore."
There's silence on both ends of the line; Kurt because that's all he can say, and Burt because he's trying to process.
"Uh… Heya, kiddo. I'm doing great, thanks." It's a poor attempt at humor, but Kurt latches onto it like a vulture to a desert carcass.
"Sorry, dad. I just… I'm glad. Is your heart doing better? How's the political world? Is Carol doing well? Finn?"
They get all the usual topics out of the way within 20 minutes, and neither feel like that's enough time, but eventually the original point of the conversation comes back anyway.
"So… not… completely gay…?"
Kurt doesn't blame his father for being confused. If anything most kids end up telling their parents they aren't completely straight (see also; Rachel). But leave it to him to be a special snowflake, or something. "Yeah… Um… Yes. Yeah. Not completely."
No one said the Hummels were always good at speaking.
Burt, thankfully, has the sense and tact to approach the subject carefully, and with nothing more than curiosity and support. "Alright. Well, how did you, you know… Come about that idea? I mean, have you…?"
Kurt's face goes red. "No! I mean, uh, no. Not yet- I mean. Just no. Not that. It's just that…" He takes a deep breath, runs a hand through his hair, and sighs. "Maybe I should start from the beginning?"
"That's usually a pretty good place to start, yeah."
So he does. From the top, so to speak.
He tells his dad about how he ended up playing peacekeeper and off-and-on caretaker, how he slowly built up a certain level of mutual trust and comfort with both young women on all new levels, his break up, and the events that happened afterwards. And the… feelings that starting coming with it all.
Burt is quiet for a bit, and his son lets him be, knowing that his dad likes to think things through and speak when he's sure of something. Finally,
"Alright. Well. That makes sense. I mean, Kurt, you've never had a problem with considering yourself an 'honorary' girl, but that doesn't mean you've been comfortable around them. Last I checked you thought you were goin' to die when you first saw a woman naked…"
Kurt rolled his eyes. "Dad. I was 16."
"Yeah. And most boys don't mind seeing that kinda thing at 16. All I'm sayin' is don't jump to conclusions, you know? Let yourself get a handle on what you're feeling before you decide what you are or are not. Maybe you just aren't used to having this kind of relationship with women."
"But Dad, it's not like that. I'm actually jealous of them! I mean-" He bites his lip. If he finishes that sentence, puts thoughts into words, that makes it more real. And it's terrifying.
He thought admitting he was gay was scary, but when he finally did he felt like he had something solid to hold unto. Like suddenly everything made sense again. But this? This will never make sense.
It can't.
He's spent so much time being so sure of who he is and what he likes that to suddenly have that turned on his head is…
Kurt swallows, letting out a shaky breath, and then continues, voice low and just as shaky as his breath had been. "When Rachel and Santana are cuddled on the couch… I get jealous because I want to be cuddling with them. And- and sometimes- Oh god. Okay. No. No. I can't do this."
Burt interjects. "Woah, woah, Kurt, son, calm down there, kiddo. Deep breaths, alright? S'gonna be okay. I promise. Deep breaths."
He does so, breathing in and out slowly, trying to keep his hands from shaking. Even though they refuse to. "Dad I'm… I'm scared. What does this even mean?"
The young man hears his father exhale, and he can almost feel the firm, supporting hand on his shoulder. It makes him want to cry, but he doesn't. "I don't know, kid. You gotta figure that out on your own. But I promise you, no matter what you are, gay, straight, bi, whatever, I still love you, and you're still my boy. Always will be, alright?"
Choking back the hints of a sob, Kurt nods, even though his dad can't see it. "O-okay. I love you, dad. And I miss you."
"Miss you, too, Kurt. But I'll see you over the summer. Carol and I will visit in a few weeks when we can."
The conversation eventually comes to a natural end, and right on time, because as he hangs up the phone Santana and Rachel are back from their date. He hears the giggling the moment the door slides open, and he tries to get rid of the remnants of stubborn tears. He can hear them whispering, can just imagine Santana sweeping Rachel up into a heated, wanting kiss, and- Fuck, it makes his heart clench in ways that is just should fucking not.
Kurt's in his room and grabbing his things before the girls even make it past the couch, and without even a goodbye he's out the door, barely hearing Rachel's worried "Kurt?" or Santana's "What the fuck?" before he's down the hall and out the apartment.
For the first time in ever he feels like he can't be around the two when they're having sex not because it's gross or awkward, but because it just hurts.