Thank you for the reviews again!
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"Can we just lie here for a while?" he asked, his long fingers plucking my short ones away from his skin.
I nodded, trying to ignore the pain sweeping through me. Jasper smiled slightly, shifting me off his lap and laying me gently on my bed as if I was breakable although he was the one who seemed so fragile. I wanted to know the story of his scars, but I kept the words within the confines of my verbal filter. He looked vulnerable as he rolled back over facing me again, his hand seeking mine; seeking comfort.
I stared into his eyes, trying to figure out this man. Many would think he had everything; he was rich, famous and adored by many. I was learning better.
"Bella, thank you for tonight," he murmured. "When I knew you were there for Alice and not for networking, models or sex I thought you would be great to hang with. Alice speaks very highly of you, you know." The combination of his southern accent, his natural eloquence and his polite manner or speaking was a deeply charming combination.
"I can say the same for you. I must admit though, I wouldn't have minded getting laid," as if on cue, I blushed and ducked my head.
Goodbye verbal filter, so nice of you to warn me when the wine took you away.
He laughed and kissed my nose, dropping his forehead against mine. I was sure if I opened my eyes, his would be looking into mine.
"Maybe later, sugar," he appeased me, his Texan roots showing more than they had before. "For tonight would you mind just keeping me company? I get so lonely sometimes." I opened my eyes and sure enough those blue gazers were staring at me, reading me like an open book.
"How can you be so lonely in one of the busiest cities of the world?" I didn't bother trying to word it nicely to make him feel better. I was blunt and to the point. I think he appreciated that considering his career.
He started at me briefly before he answered; his breath ghosting against my skin as he did so.
"Think of it this way," he said. "If you were put in a room full of people who don't speak your language, who don't understand anything you think or feel, would you be lonely then?"
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His head was nestled into the crook of my neck, his fingers making sweeping circles across my hand. The steady rhythm of our breathing was the only sound apart from the distant hum of traffic and the gentle pitter patter of rain.
"I enjoy your company," he said randomly, his voice obscuring the silence.
"I'm glad," I whispered, shifting even closer to him.
I enjoyed his more than I should, the thought thrilling me and scaring me all at once.
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In the few hours that I had known Jasper, I had learnt so much; almost too much yet not enough at all.
I knew that the hardest thing I would ever have to do is watch him and Alice fall in love as she thought they would. I couldn't help but think that I understood him on a level she couldn't ever reach, despite the difference in the length of time we had known him.
Alice saw a polite Texan boy who never spoke out of place. I saw the man who feared saying the wrong thing.
She assumed he was raised well, his parents teaching him manners and charm. I had learnt he was just a frightened boy in the body of the man. I knew he wasn't taught manners, shyness and a polite disposition were intimidated into him.
She saw Jasper, the person who always had potential for modelling but never knew it. I knew he was desperate for the money but hated the fame.
We both see the clearly handsome guy, however she only can see the outer beauty he obtained from his classically attractive father and stunning mother. What she is blind to, the more important things to see, are the kindness of his heart or the dark pain that swims in his heart, the things I have seen already.
It wasn't Alice's fault though.
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"Does Alice know all this?" I asked him in between watching late night television and the random hour of sleep here and there.
"Know all what?" he asked. His fingers, calloused from guitar playing, dancing across my arm.
"Know all about what is underneath the beauty; how you think, how you feel...the real you."
"No," he said simply.
Half an hour or so passed, the dark of the room seeming heavier in preparation for the continuation of the conversation that I wasn't even sure would happen.
"For her to know all that, I would have to let her in. I learnt that doing that leaves you vulnerable and easily weakened, so I guess I am averse to allowing anyone in." He paused again, the air in the room thick with unspoken secrets and the silence of a hard youth. "For you I made an exception though."
"Why?"
"Because, my dear Bella..." he started as rain began to splatter against my windows. "I thought you might understand me."
"How could you of known that within a few moments of knowing me?"
"I couldn't, I guess. I felt something though...some sort of draw to you. I was hoping it wouldn't be wrong." He smiled at me and I realized he wasn't wrong. We just clicked.
"But what if you were wrong?"
"Well then I probably would have gotten to fuck a very hot woman."
The sound of our laughter joined the rain as the only noises of the night.
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"Do you know the Hush Sound?" he asked me as we discussed music. Alice was right; we were similar in this aspect too.
"I love them."
"Can we listen to 'You are the moon'?" I nodded, retrieving my iPod. I was just about to find my speakers when he tugged me back onto the bed, my back crashed against his chest. He gently placed one of the ear buds into my ear. Long fingers brushed back my hair; I blushed.
"I really love this song," I said, my voice sounding tiny against the loud of the music humming in my ear. "Why did you want to listen to it?"
"Listen to the lyrics, darlin'," was his cryptic answer.
As I sat there, his legs twined with me; his arms forming a cage around me, I obeyed his request.
Shadows all around you as you surface from the dark
Emerging from the gentle grip of night's unfolding arms
Darkness, darkness everywhere, do you feel all alone?
The subtle grace of gravity, the heavy weight of stone
You don't see what you possess, a beauty calm and clear
It floods the sky and blurs the darkness like a chandelier
All the light that you possess is skewed by lakes and seas
The shattered surface, so imperfect, is all that you believe
I will bring a mirror, so silver, so exact
So precise and so pristine, a perfect pane of glass
I will set the mirror up to face the blackened sky
You will see your beauty every moment that you rise
He was playing me this song to show me how I made him feel, I realized. A small smile broke out across my face.
"You make me feel beautiful," he whispered against my hair, his voice constraining so many emotions.
I turned, a hard task considering the way we were tangled, and kissed his lips.
I pulled back, waiting for the rejection again. As tears welled up in my eyes, he moved closer.
"You make me feel whole, Bella," he kissed my forehead, his warm lips lingering. "You make me feel human."
The rejection was quickly replaced by joy as his lingering lips found their way to mine.
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A/N:
Hell yes. Kisses make everything better, am I right?
I am updating while at a friends house. God I love mini laptops ;) Be lucky I loved you enough to post twice in a 48 hour period! -and cause I wanted to wake up to reviews....-