Realizations
Rated PG so far. Angsty.
Summary: When Spike disappears saving the world, the Scooby gang realizes just how much he meant to them, and want him back.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of these people, Joss does. I just manipulate them to do my bidding... muahahahahahha.
Set in my fictional Season 6. Spike loves Buffy, Buffy died, she and Spike hooked up, and Tara knows about them. But Tara and Willow are together, and Willow isn't magic addicted.


**** Chapter 3 - The Aftermath ****

Buffy let a tear roll down her cheek. Behind the locked door of her bedroom, it was alright to admit her feelings. For an instant, she wished Spike were there to comfort her. Just as he had been when her mom was sick. When she came back from Heaven. But she knew he wouldn't be there for her now. Because he was the one she was crying for. She burst into tears.

***

Leaving the other Scobbies in the living room, Dawn went upstairs to check on her sister. She had gone up to shower and change, but hadn't come down yet. And when Dawn heard the sobs coming from the other side of the door, she knew why. Wisely, she left and went back downstairs.

Is she okay? Willow asked, a concerned look on her face.

Dawn didn't know how to answer. She crossed her arms. She's crying. The room was quiet. Xander was the first to speak.

Guys, I know that Spike is gone, but it's Spike. Anya hit him on the arm, and Dawn glared at him.

And he has saved your life a lot.

Everyone looked up at this unexpected reaction from Tara.

I mean... he's done a lot of good... lately... She stuttered, echoing words she had spoken to Buffy. She nervously sat down.

Tara's right. Now everyone looked at Anya. Xander raised an eyebrow. And silence fell over the room again.

What do you think happened, Giles?

Giles looked at Willow, and took off his glasses to clean them. I'm really not sure, Willow. It appears that when Spike's blood was spilt, it closed the Hellmouth.

And chalk one up to Captain Observey. Xander quipped.

Giles pinched the bridge of his nose. It is late. We should all get some sleep, and meet at the Magic Box first thing in the morning to research what happened.

The group nodded. Xander even agreed to show. He and Anya left. As Giles left, he turned to Dawn. If she needs anything... Dawn nodded, closing the door behind him. Mumbling goodnight to Willow and Tara, she trudged upstairs to her room. The two girls looked at each other sadly and followed the teen upstairs.

In her room, Buffy listened as her friends either left or went to sleep. She pulled the covers further over her head and grabbed another tissue. She missed Spike. Of course, she wouldn't admit it. No one, save Tara, knew about them, and if they did, they wouldn't understand. No one would understand that she was in love with him.

She sat upright with that realization. She was in love with him. After all this time, she finally realized her feelings. A calm feeling came over her as a smile started to curve her lips. She was in love with Spike. Each time she said it, she grew more comfortable with it.

But then reality hit her and she started to cry again. Spike was gone. He was gone, and she didn't know where he was or how to get him back. Lifting her head, she made a choice. She would get him back. And when she did, she would tell him how she felt.

But first, she needed to do the research.