Gamzee had already headed off to 'work' for a few hours. And by 'work', it means him standing in an alley selling and offering drugs. I'd complain, but it pays good enough, and it gives me a few hours to myself.

I stumble as I pull a pair of well used sweat pants on over my legs. I throw on one of Gamzee's purple hoodies and zip it up over my black turtle neck sweater. I walk to the main room and pull my grey converse on before stepping out into the brisk autumn air. I shivered and slunk my head down, sticking my hands into the pockets of the hoodie.

Gamzee would kill me if he saw me now. Ou of the motel, wearing his hoodie. Even so, I need the fresh air.

I slowly walked out of the motel lot and down the pavement, walking aimlessly. I know there's a small park a couple blocks away. I sigh and let my thoughts take over.

Gamzee's eyes are first to come to mind. So bright and odd. After all, who has purple eyes? Though, he hates me looking at them. If I could, I would never stop looking. But Gamzee wouldn't allow it. He'd beat me until everyone of my muscles ached. I would deserve it. After all, if he doesn't want me looking at his eyes, I shouldn't be looking at his eyes.

I groan and stretch my arms as I see the park. My body still hurts from earlier tofay. Thankfully I had been able to shower and clean myself.

Gamzee doesn't like me taking showers, or baths for that matter. I don't exactly know that for sure but he glares at me like he's going to beat me, but he usually just yells at me for being an ungrateful slut.

I sit down on a cold bench and look around the colorful park. Some of the tree already turning colors, other still nice and green. I love fall, I get to wear my favorite sweaters everyday.

Last year, during winter, it had snowed so bad we were practically blocked into our motel room and the power had gone out. Gamzee was so desperate for warmth, he let me snuggle on his lap while we were surrounded by, like, seven blankets. It was one of those moments I hoped would never end.

I humped back to reality as a dog walked up to me and dropped a tennis ball on my lap. The dog was pure white with stunning green eyes. I stared at the eyes lovingly, before the dog nudged me.

I took the ball in my shaky hands and tossed the ball hard across the dying grass. The dog barked and quickly chased after it. I smiled as it ran and pounced onto the ball before grabbing it in its mouth. It swiftly ran back and dropped the ball in my lap. I chuckled and threw the ball harder this time, the dog quickly chased the ball, and brought it back just as quickly. It was a fast dog. A surprisingly fast dog for how its body is built. Even so, I threw the ball again.

"Oh my gosh, Bec, what are you doing over here?" an exasperated sounding girl said following the dog as it dropped the ball onto my lap.

I looked up at the girl who had long, dark brown hair, tan skin, and soft green eyes that were behind large wire rimmed glasses. She also had a lot of random colored strings tied around her fingers. I smiled at the strings.

"I'm sorry," she said shyly, taking the tennis ball from my lap. "He likes to play with strangers." I nod and look down at the dog, who seemed to still be waiting for someone to throw the ball.

"It's okay. He's a beautiful dog," I say back, ducking my head down a bit, avoiding eye contact.

"Yeah, he is. He's a sweetheart too." She bent down and ruffled the dog's fur. "Isn't that right, Bec?"

I chuckled at the girls love for the dog. I could feel an emptiness inside me start to chur as I saw the green eyed girl love her dog.

"I'm... Karkat," I say boldly, hoping I wasn't being too forward. I don't talk to people very often.

"Oh. I'm Jade." She smiled at me and glanced at her watch. She yawned deeply before pulling a bright blue leash from her bag and clipped it onto her dog's collar. "I'm sorry. I'd love to stay and chat, but my grandpa is probably going to want me back home."

"Oh, okay," I say, honestly a little sad. "Bye then."

She waved and led her dog out of the park. I sighed deeply as she was out of sight. What had I even expected? She'd suddenly call me friend? She'd want to hand around me? A beat up guy who can't even say what he thinks anymore?

I clench my jaw and stare at the park trees. They're so beautiful, even though some happened to grow into weird shapes. But they were all pruned and cared properly for.

I stick my hand in my pocket and pull out my watch. I never keep it on my arm, after all, Gamzee would definitely break it if I did. I sighed and glanced at my watch. 4:07 pm.

Gamzee had been gone for almost an hour now. He's usually out for at least three hours at a time. Which is a good thing for me, unless he comes back from the bar.

Usually when Gamzee is drunk, he gets drunk at home, around peace and quiet. At the bar when he gets drunk, there are people there who put up a fight when he hits them. He often comes home with a bloody nose or a black eyes or something I usually get punished for.

Once Gamzee had come home with three large scratches down his face. They were bleeding terribly and I had instantly run run over to him, fussing over his face. I had begun to tell him he needed to go to the hospital, but he had shut me up by pulling my hair.

When I asked him what happened exactly, he only told me a girl at the bar was being an annoying bitch with her boyfriend. She apparently had ended up scratching his face with her nails. I doubt that to an extent, since his face looked like a large cat had mauled his face. Gamzee said he had beat the boyfriend up really badly and he seemed to be quiet proud of it too.

Even so, once I had cleaned his face up a bit, he released any anger he didn't get out at the bar, on me. Which was a lot that night apparently, but of course, it's always a lot when he comes back from the bar.