Chapter One

Mommy Issues

"Let all cats old enough to slink in the shadows gather here for a Clan meeting!" Spottedstar's voice echoed across the clearing.

Warriors emerged from dens, finishing their grooming and settling down. The elders creaked out of their den, murmuring to each other. Nettleclaw walked out of the nursery, her kits squealing and stumbling out behind her. Sweetkit gave her brother a huge shove from behind, sending Mudkit tumbling over himself. The little light kit threw her head back and let out a guffaw of laughter as her darker-colored brother stumbled to his paws. Their mother quickly hurried the kits forward as they settled next to Darkfoot for the meeting.

"I want all of you to be aware of the severity of our current situation." Spottedstar's green eyes flashed with a bit of fear. "A border patrol discovered five dead warriors at the Twoleg Greenplace."

A gasp arose from the gathered cats. Sweetkit's eyes widened in shock and she turned to glance at her father. Darkfoot looked nervous.

Spottedstar held her tail high for silence. She nodded. "I know. This is frightening. And that's exactly why we needed to discuss it with all of you." She looked around at her cats. "Each warrior was from a different Clan. SkyClan's Dustfall, ThunderClan's Squirrelpelt, WindClan's Grassrunner, RiverClan's Heartpool, and ShadowClan's own Marshleap."

A wail came from the back of the crowd and Sweetkit turned to look at Thrushtail, Marshleap's mate. The gray she-cat's shoulders trembled.

Spottedstar's face melted into sadness as she looked upon Thrushtail. "We don't know how Marshleap ended up where she did. No one saw her leave last night?" The cats shook their heads, murmuring. Spottedstar nodded. "It's strange that cats from all five Clans could end up somewhere so far from all the camps without being noticed." Her eyes flicked to her deputy, Russetheart. "I will be meeting with the other leaders at the Gathering Place at dawn tomorrow to discuss this. Russetheart is going to watch the camp while I'm away. For now, I want you all to rest. No cat is to leave camp for any reason until I return."

Sweetkit stuck out her tongue at that. She already wasn't supposed to leave camp, but she'd done it twice before. She'd dragged Mudkit along and they'd slithered through a hole in the nursery wall, and out into the darkness beyond the camp. Mudkit had cried the whole time, but Sweetkit was brave. She even ran all the way to a tree and back before they slipped back into the warm calm of the nursery. But now, with Spottedstar gone and the supposed danger lurking everywhere, Sweetkit doubted she could get away with much.

Spottedstar stood still for a moment, staring down at her Clan. She looked broken-up, Sweetkit thought. There was panic and worry in her eyes. The speckled leader dipped her head. "That is all. Dismissed."

The Clan started to drift apart, mewing softly about the news. Sweetkit spotted a gaggle of warriors around Thrushtail's sobbing form as Nettleclaw ushered her kits back to the nursery. Once Sweetkit and Mudkit were tumbling back into the nursery, a small golden head shot up from the mess of moss in the back corner. Honeykit smiled weakly, though it was with pain. All her movements were with pain. Sweetkit padded over to her adopted sister and settled herself on the moss.

"What happened this time, Sweetkit?" Honeykit's green eyes were wide with curiosity.

"Something really bad." Sweetkit said softly, shaking her head. She knew this was a serious topic, so she should behave as so.

Mudkit waddled over next to her. "Everyone's dying!" He yelled abruptly. Honeykit flattened her ears and squeezed her eyes shut in pain. Sweetkit whirled on her brother, little teeth bared in a growl. "Don't be so loud! You know it hurts Honeykit's ears!" Mudkit stepped back, averting his gaze. "I'm sorry."

Sweetkit rolled her eyes and turned back to Honeykit, whose face was buried in the moss. The little cream kit reached out a paw to prod her sister. Honeykit peeked out. Sweetkit lowered her face to press her nose to Honeykit's. "It's okay. He'll be quiet now." Mudkit nodded fervently, still pressed shamefully against the floor. Honeykit raised her head and nodded. "So, why is everyone dying?" The sick kit's eyes glimmered with fear.

Sweetkit tapped the top of Honeykit's head. "It's okay. Spottedstar found a bunch of dead warriors in Greenplace." Honeykit looked about to panic. "No, no, it's okay!" Sweetkit hurried, "Only one warrior was from ShadowClan."

"Which one?" Honeykit asked quietly, head cocked in question.

Sweetkit's ear flicked as she tried to remember the name. "Marshleap, I think." Honeykit lowered her eyes. "That's sad." She murmured. "She always gave me a nice smile."

Sweetkit heard the thump of Nettleclaw's paws as she padded over and swept Mudkit and Sweetkit close to her with her tail. "Shh… let's not talk about this now. It's almost sunset." The gray queen began grooming the top of Mudkit's head. When she finished with the brown tom, she turned on Sweetkit and licked her clean as well. She ushered the kits back to their nest. Sweetkit settled down, Mudkit curled at her side, his tail draped annoyingly over her back. Sometimes she didn't like him. Sweetkit laid her head on her paws, closing her eyes to slits so she could still watch Honeykit and Nettleclaw. Nettleclaw curled herself around Honeykit's body, giving her long, smooth licks. Honeykit shivered each time, though she closed her eyes.

Sweetkit turned away, facing her littermate's ear instead. She and Mudkit were Darkfoot and Nettleclaw's real kits. But Nettleclaw spent so much time with Honeykit, it almost didn't seem like that anymore. Nettleclaw had told Sweetkit how sick Honeykit was. She couldn't get out of her nest. She never had. Nettleclaw said that since Honeykit's mama; Crowmask, had died when she'd kitted, taking the other unborn kit with her, Nettleclaw had taken care of Honeykit. Sweetkit growled softly in the back of her throat, closing her eyes and pressing her nose into Mudkit's ear. At least she had Mudkit. Even though he was annoying and a scaredy-cat, at least she still had him. Mudkit flicked his ear slightly as Sweetkit touched it, but didn't move away. His soft breathing slowly and eventually lulled Sweetkit to sleep.

Sweetkit stood in front of Nettleclaw, her head lowered in shame. Mudkit crouched behind his mother, eyes wide in shock as he stared from his littermate to Nettleclaw.

"I cannot believe you, Sweetkit!" Nettleclaw's voice shook with fury. "You know how fragile Honeykit is!" The gray she-cat's lips curled in a growl and she bent low, nearly eye-to-eye with the small kit in front of her. "You cannot go asking her to pull favors for you!"
"It wasn't a favor!" Sweetkit's head snapped up, and she looked half aghast, half furious. "I just asked if she would play mossball with me, since you were busy grooming Mudkit!"

Nettleclaw shook with rage. But, her voice was terrifyingly steady and silky as she spoke the next words. "Sweetkit, you know what flowers are, right?" Sweetkit nodded. Of course she did! She was four moons old, after all. Nettleclaw continued on. "Flowers need gentle love and care to grow. They are fragile. They break easily; if even lightly stepped on. But they are beautiful. We have to take care of them." Sweetkit searched her mother's eyes, hoping Nettleclaw was talking about her. Sweetkit, like a flower. A flower that deserved love, right? But with Nettleclaw's next sentence, her hope shattered. "Honeykit is like a flower. Honeykit needs protection and gentle love, from all of us. Flowers grow in kind conditions. Good conditions. We need to give her all that."

Sweetkit felt she might cry. Her head was lowered again, her chin resting on her fluffy chest. Why did Honeykit deserve all this love? Why didn't Sweetkit get any? Sweetkit and Mudkit were Nettleclaw's kits! Not Honeykit! Yet, because Honeykit was sick, she got so much more attention. Nettleclaw loved her more. She was sure of it.

Sweetkit looked up into her mother's eyes, blue on green. "Nettleclaw, why do you love Honeykit more than you love me and Mudkit?"

From his place cowering behind Nettleclaw, Mudkit gasped. Nettleclaw stiffened, but her gaze didn't waver from her small daughter's. "I do not love Honeykit more. I do not love you less. I love all three of you equally." Sweetkit's distrust in Nettleclaw's statement must've shown, because Nettleclaw growled and lowered her head again. "You are just a kit. You do not understand the intricacies of raising a family." In fact, Sweetkit didn't understand half of the words Nettleclaw was saying, let alone the 'in-turkeys about raising a family.' "It's very hard to take care of someone when another is in more danger and pain." Nettleclaw's eyes finally softened. She reached out to press her nose to Sweetkit's forehead, but the little kit drew back. Annoyance flashed for a second on her mother's face, but it was quickly replaced with a sickeningly sweet smile. "You matter to me, Sweetkit. So does Mudkit. So does Honeykit. Just, Honeykit is suffering more than you are right now, so she needs our help." Sweetkit didn't like the use of the word 'our.' Honeykit wasn't her problem!

Sweetkit glanced over at Mudkit. Perhaps he could help her. But no. He was as he always was. Quiet and scared. He just gave her a wide-eyed stare, slowly shaking his head as if he had carefully predicted her every move, and knew what was coming better than she did. Sweetkit didn't like that. "I don't wanna deal with Honeykit anymore!" Sweetkit blurted. "And I don't wanna deal with you!" Mudkit closed his eyes and lowered his head, letting out a soft sigh. Sweetkit hated that. With the best attempt at a growl she could muster, the small kit turned and stalked out of the nursery. She could hear Mudkit and Nettleclaw shouting her name after her, but she didn't care. She needed to find Darkfoot.

"Darkfoot!" Sweetkit yowled, head swerving left and right. "Darkfoot, where are you?" She paused. Maybe he was out on patrol. That was probably it. Sweetkit was about to sit down near the fresh-kill pile and wait for him when a voice behind her made her jump.

"Darkfoot's out on morning patrol. He'll be back soon." A fluffy Siamese sat down next to her. Wasppaw flashed a grin at Sweetkit. She grimaced back. "He needs to get back on time, so he can train me." The apprentice tilted his head to the side. "What are you looking for him for?"

"Nettleclaw was giving me a lecture about Honeykit. I hated it, so I ran away." Sweetkit flicked at the dirt with a claw. Wasppaw raised an eyebrow. "That's not all, is it?" Sweetkit sighed, shaking her little head. "I said I didn't want to deal with her anymore." Wasppaw took a sharp breath. "Yikes. That's pretty bad." Sweetkit nodded solemnly. "I know. I need to find Darkfoot so he can fix it."

Wasppaw flicked his tail over Sweetkit's back. "It'll be alright. I used to fight with my mother, Soulgaze, all the time. We always worked it out."

Sweetkit narrowed her eyes and looked up at Wasppaw. "But this is different. Nettleclaw doesn't love me."

Wasppaw raised an eyebrow. "All queens love their kits. I'm sure you'll sort it out."

Sweetkit growled, the fur along her spine bristling. "Nettleclaw doesn't love me." She repeated. "She doesn't love Mudkit. She doesn't love Darkfoot. She only loves Honeykit."

Wasppaw tipped his head. "How-" But he was promptly cut off by the energetic yowls of the returning morning patrol. It was led by a large, muscular dark tom whose grin seemed to make the whole camp perk up. Sweetkit gasped and hopped to her paws, leaving Wasppaw to scamper after her. Darkfoot hardly seemed to notice the kit tumbling around his paws until Sweetkit gave a loud yowl. Darkfoot looked down, his amber eyes meeting hers. "Oh, hello, nutkin. Where's Mudkit?"

"He's in the nursery with Nettleclaw." Sweetkit's lip curled and she narrowed her eyes. "And Honeykit."

Darkfoot seemed to notice that something was off about the kit. He sighed and settled on his haunches, curling his tail around Sweetkit. She nearly drowned in her father's fluff, and had to smooth his fur away from her muzzle with a paw. Without a word, the large tom began licking his kit's head. His tongue flattened her ears and the wet fur on Sweetkit's head stuck straight up. She felt a bit annoyed that Darkfoot wasn't speaking, but to be licked by your father was a soothing thing. Sweetkit's little muzzle parted in a yawn. Her eyes were drooping until she heard her father's deep rumbling voice.

"You're angry at Honeykit." He murmured, using his gargantuan paw to smooth the cowlick on the little cream kit's head.

"And at Nettleclaw." Sweetkit piped, her tail flicking angrily. She could still feel a bubble of anger in her throat, though it had decreased in intensity. "Today I wanted to play with Mudkit, but Nettleclaw had to clean him, so I asked Honeykit instead." The bubble of fury was rising again, and she spat. "Nettleclaw told me that Honeykit is a flower, and that we need to love her."

Darkfoot nodded. "That is true. Honeykit is fragile."

"I'm not done." Sweetkit growled. "Nettleclaw yelled at me. Then, I got mad and I ran away." She left out the part about yelling right back at her mother.

Darkfoot was silent for a while once more. When he spoke, he tilted his head toward the nursery, where Mudkit's small form was visible in the entrance. He was watching them. When Sweetkit caught his eye, he stood and vanished back into the darkness. Darkfoot let out a purr. "He's worried for you."

Sweetkit scoffed. "Nu-uh. He's just watching to see me get in trouble."

Darkfoot chuckled. "Oh, nutkin, you know that's not true." The large tom shifted and laid his head down on the ground. He was so big that Sweetkit's head only came to his eye. Darkfoot closed his eyes and yawned, murmuring. "Lay with me. It's going to be alright. You and Nettleclaw will make up. It all will pass."

Sweetkit tucked her paws under her chest, leaning her head against her father's cheek. She looked around the camp with half-lidded eyes, until she finally closed them. As she started drifting off, she felt a small muzzle nudge under Darkfoot's tail with her. When she opened one eye a crack, she saw a puff of russet-brown fur and a spotted muzzle.

Sweetkit slowly fell asleep, surrounded by Mudkit and Darkfoot. All was well.