Chapter 3 Sully's recovery
Disclaimer I do not own the characters in this story. I wish the people who did would use them and create new series.
Week3...
This week was becoming a mirror of the past two. He was still frustrated stemming from his feeling at being fenced in, it still hurt to move. He still felt like he was cooped up like one of Colleen's hens.
His emotions on a constant see saw swaying minute to minute it was affecting all his senses he was literally feeling sick to the stomach. Sully was not accustomed to not being in control it was unnerving him, not knowing.
They continued to go to the hot springs late as usual. His bruising was lessening but the soreness was still present. They were yellowing and fading slightly.
Sully woke up some mornings his pillow was wet he had been crying tears for his lost life. He'd turn the pillow over so as not to let the others know. Mourning for the loss of his dreams.
Michaela had given Sully a copy of Walt Whitman's poetry to read when he was alone. It remained on the bed side table untouched. He had no interest in anything he couldn't concentrate anyway.
One day in about the middle of the week Michaela as always trying to be optimistic during a conversation.
Said "Now wait a minute you could start healing in a couple of days or weeks"
Sully testily replied "Or not at all"
"It could take even months but there are things we can do to speed up the process" she continued dragging the sheet down and beginning to massage his leg. Sully grabbed his night shirt to cover more of himself glaring at her.
Realizing he can't feel her movements suddenly slapped him "What are ya doin" he asked urgently
Continuing she says "We need to keep the legs healthy in case the spinal cord is healthy"
Irritated now he sneers "Ya just wasting ya time I can't feel anything"
Not to be deterred she replies "That's not the point we have to keep the muscles strong, stimulate the blood vessels" continuing to massage his leg.
The revelation that he cannot feel her hands on his legs He says "I don't want to do this now I just want to be by myself don't go feelin sorry for me" he said defiantly.
Leaving she pivoted around saying "I'll make you a deal I won't feel sorry for you as long as you stop feeling sorry for yourself" Ugh! Men she says silently to herself.
In desperation his he called, "Michaela! Please!" But she was out the back door running towards the vegetable patch again in tears again.
As Michaela left the room Sully's heart began to pound in his chest. He began to breathing rapidly and he felt totally out of control. He couldn't figure out what was happening and shutting his eyes he tried to bring his breathing and heart beat back to normal. Finally after about half an hour he felt in control. He had never had an episode where he felt he'd been wrestling a long horn before. Sully felt he could not tell Michaela because he didn't understand what had just happened.
As the weeks were progressing the disillusionment was palatable and electric within the cabin. Each day brought more disappointment. Sully was feeling so worthless he wasn't even able to do the smallest job to ease the burden of daily life. His escalating irritation and anxiety was engulfing his being to the core. He had lost hope. His mind obsessed about lost dreams and not being a total man.
Sleep was his constant nemesis as it would evade him during the early hours. His mind is reallin. A sudden pain in his back not felt before like another kick made him suck air into his lungs with a gasp.
His mood swung like a pendulum in the opposite directions. He was trying to assist by cooperating one day pulling himself up on a homemade bar. The Reverend asked him to try to do another one for the lord. He did it and Brian said he'd improve from two weeks before. Due only to his dogged determination to please others he kept trying. Sully couldn't resist a forlorn glance at Dr Mike she longingly gazed into his eyes before he quickly dropped his again looking in the opposite direction.
Sully was emotional curling into himself. He was withdrawing from everything. Michaela found him curling into a ball under the covers faced away from the room. He had pretended to be asleep all day. His mind wouldn't allow him to rest. Around and around his mind whirled his tears threatening to envelope him at any moment. He knew he was crippled, he had no will power to save himself. His hatred growing daily for the slimy B****d Rankin who had robbed him of his dream, was festering as usual and filling him with revulsion in his thoughts.
A really new feeling of hope he'd suppressed before his life with the Cheyenne was gone now. He knew Michaela was worried but he was incapable now to talk about how he was feeling to anyone especially her.
The next morning Mathew was applying the salve with Michaela rolled the bandages for the clinic.
Suddenly and excitedly she exclaimed "They moved your toes they moved" she exclaimed excitedly. "Concentrate"
Suddenly the immense feeling of excitement and anticipation filled the room. Everyone was beginning to feel happy.
Continuing Michaela said "You'll be walking again before you know it"
"Good, good I've got things to do" he replied in a menacing tone. Scowling and not looking at anyone. Michaela's heart froze as she understood the depth of feeling Sully was feeling for him to even voice such a threat.
Immediately his appetite returned. He'd feel really good in the mornings but falling in a heap in the afternoons. He moved to a chair giving his elbows and heels a chance to heal. He tried to remain upbeat occasionally though he was plunged down into the depths again. Still experiencing huge mood swings.
Sully's pride and impatience now took over his common sense. He wanted it all *NOW!* He wanted his life back and aggravation welling up again. He began to exercise frantically although Michaela suggested moderation and to ease into it. What Michaela had said about exercising while he was in bed came back with a vengeance. He realized he should have been more cooperative then.
He wanted to walk now and was irritated by the slow progress. He wanted to do it by himself. Show her that he could be independent again, also to himself.
"I want to try on my own" Sully grumpedgrabbing at the crutch. Mathew and Michaela were supporting his weight between them as he tentatively took his first steps.
"You're not ready yet" Michaela stated.
Annoyed Sully replied "Yes I am" He stumbled and began to fall Mathew and Michaela dragging him back to the step of the homestead. Now it became obvious to Sully it was actually going to take some time for him to recover his strength. Much slower steps would assist him to achieve his goal. Though he was more settled knowing he would eventually walk again. He had regained* Hope* once again.
One day on the bed he was suddenly aware that he was watching Michaels and her movements. Her graceful actions made him desire to hold her in his arms then other thoughts came to mind. He suddenly covered his lower abdomen with the quilt aware of what the thoughts had done to his body, he blushed and was grateful she had not witnessed his embarrassment. Relieved once again that he felt whole and a *MAN* again. Not that he'd used that function since Abigail had died and he could only pray that one day he would with the woman in front of him.
A few nights later Sully gets up to get wood. Michaela says his Doctor says it's too early. Brian reminds him that he'd not completed the Running Ghost story. Everyone settled back while he retold the Cheyenne legend. Sully and the family did not realize at the time how this legend would become so important.
WEEK 4...
All the while Sully was laying in bed the one constant was how he ended up there nearly losing his life was Rankin. How a simple request had escalated into a savage beating. This had simmered for the weeks he'd been recovering.
Now it consumed him. Keeping his mood dark and he became obsessed with revenging himself. As moving became better less painful he moved around the yard outside.
One day he decided to try out his tomahawk. Mathew was watching Sully as he managed to get enough strength to slam the weapon into the side of the barn. Mathew nodded in agreement. Although he had to grab hold of his side as his ribs still hurt with any movement. They were weeks off being completely healed. There were only traces of the bruising on different parts of his body. The faded boot marks still evident.
One day Dr Mike met the man acting as a buyer for the railroad when she confronted Rankin in front of the hotel. She was appalled at his obvious disregard for what he'd inflicted on Sully. She'd blurted out that Sully was still alive. Not realizing that she placed them all in imminent danger.
Horace who generally kept his own council was scandalized by what Dr Mike had told him of the attack on Sully. He sent off a telegram to the Territory Marshal. Saying he hoped Rankin would have to pay for what he'd done to Sully.
The next morning Dr Mike realizing what she'd done by telling Rankin he was alive. Forcing Sully to now have to leave the shelter of the home stead, before he was totally healed. And before he was ready to live normally, it was far too soon.
She couldn't help but tell him if he killed Rankin she never wanted to see him again. She knew this was not his true character when she emphasised she'd never seen him so angry. It actually frightened her.
Dr Mike and Cloud Dancing worked together to save Sully after he was badly hurt by Rankin. She was aware of the deep feeling she had begun to experience for him. She decided to ask the Cheyenne for help and they used ceremony to bring forth Running Ghost.
Cloud Dancing urged her to speak to Sully "you must find him" "You are the only one he will listen too". Explaining to her that this had now become Sully's fight though the Cheyenne would do whet they could.
They commenced a ceremony to invoke the White Buffalo. Dr Mike was most grateful for Chief Black Kettle's and the Cheyenne peoples help. Their spirit had called up their revered buffalo spirit as protection for Sully this was due to a direct connection between Sully and his adopted family. Their bond was a strong spiritual connection to him as he had attempted to help them.
Going after Rankin for revenge and rage was all consuming in Sully's mind. The hatred he felt was a frightening emotion. It provoked him through his whole being. Before he was aware of his environment he was at the camp they were using. Crouched low he took Skinna out cold. Bluey was aware of his present and came at him with a knife. Where was his main target Rankin he listened and heard a shot off in the distance. Aware that he was not fighting fit he mounted his horse again.
Without regard for his safety he omits a war cry and rides at Rankin unaware the Ghost Buffalo was there as protection. A fight issues and they struggle. Eventually straddling over Rankin's body he could easily do him in. He sees and hears Michaela afraid of losing him. Then he realizes he'd lose her for all time if he did kill this slimy individual. Slamming his tomahawk down the side if Rankin's head slicing his ear.
"Ya be gone by morning, take nothing with ya, if I ever see ya again I'll kill ya" Sully pants out. He is really sore and his ribs have cracked again. He struggles onto the horse again and prepares to leave.
Rankin didn't care if Sully had spared his life he just wanted him dead, aiming at Sully's retreating back with his rifle he aimed. Before that could occur the White Buffalo appeared, charged and gored Rankin. Sully turned and witnessed the whole incident. Rankin lay dead on the ground.
Weary and unable to ride he sees Michaela. SHE'D COME TO HIM.
Sully slid from the horse unable to hold on any longer due to the soreness and fatigue of pushing himself now the adrenalin was depleted. Michaela was there by his side in seconds.
She gathered Sully's head tenderly into her lap. She had given to him all the strength she had the past weeks. She was so relieved that he was alive.
Sully says "It's over"
Michaela relieved but couldn't not know asks "Tell me you didn't kill him"
"I didn't" gasping for air hefinally said "I didn't kill him"
"Hush she says nobody deserved the beating you received, I am so proud of you did well, we'll do this together, I'll see to those ribs later" Michaela reinforced with a shy smile
"I didn't want ta lose ya, you mean the world to me, your my world now I can't live without ya". He panted
Bending down she lightly kisses him on the forehead. "I know" she replies
He sighs contentedly. Knowing he could now let it go and begin to climb out of his dark hole he has been in since the beating. He'd seen his *Shadow* and had been in a *Dark Place*.
They realized there was a long way to go and it would not be easy but they'd travel together. Now his hope was returned. Holding tightly onto Michaela's arm, the contact was as if his whole life depended on it.
Sully's life line.
The End
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I acknowledgeLinda4HIM59 for this idea. Thank you
This video brings a lot of Running Ghost to life
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More snippets of RG Sully's dream.
.com/watch?v=IA5akk_LLl4
Please Review
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The writers skirted this subject Sully RG. Loren's with his Stroke and Aging F&S. Olive and Dorothy's aging women, loss of self & breast operation LN, Horace's & Marjorie's Marriage Breakup. Grief, Death and Dying, Abigail, Maude, Charlotte, Becky Marjory, Elizabeth Quinn and not in the least forgetting Washita. It is hard in a half hour episode but they did their very best with great actors.
I felt impelled to dig deeper.
If people are suffering from depression please look for help. If a person you know suffers from depression encourage them to seek medical help.
Here in Australia many young men are suffering especially in the country areas many are dying. You need to listen and not offer advice keep encouraging them to seek proper help.
I researched some from the Black Dog Depression organisation here in OZ. Mainly knowledge I have acquired as a nurse and training with others.
Working with Men's Club 21 aged gentlemen and their carer's and having mate's who are Men's Health Educators.
Don't get me wrong we had heaps of laughs, love and as well remember it's called Balance.