Can You Feel my Heart

(Listen to the song Breezeblocks by Alt-J (CryWolf remix )

Part 3

Over the next five years, we had spent every day together we could and I learned how to properly blend in with my kind and accept myself for the person I was now. The only thing had changed was our relationship; it took me two years before I would sleep in the same bed as my loving boyfriend. At first he wouldn't touch me, as if he feared me getting up and leaving if he even brushed his fingers against mine. However I shocked him; it had been the middle of the night when I came into our room and he was casually reading his book in the moonlight. I had crawled into the bed and wrapped my arms around him from behind, spooning him easily while burying my face in his soft purple locks.

"Dorian?" he had asked quietly, placing his book on the nightstand but not moving. I nodded, trying not to cry as I answered him, "Yes it's me. I...I'm so sorry Yama. I know I haven't been the best boyfriend but I was so angry and hurt..." I had to swallow to prevent the sobs from coming out but failed as they tore through my chest. "I'm so sorry." He hadn't said a word as I sobbed into his neck, clenching him to my chest as if he was my life line. Tsukiyama never spoke about that night and I was thankful for that, but he showed me every day since that night how much he loved me. Letters, flowers, poems, dinner dates every weekend and so much more; I was flattered but we both knew we had a long way to go before I trusted him again.

It would be another year before we became intimate. I had never been with another man before and Tsukiyama made me so damn nervous that I could never work up the courage to ask him anything regarding sex. We kissed and held hands everywhere we went, cuddled on the couch and in bed at night but we never went further than making out and grinding occasionally. The first time we actually made love was an experience I hope I never forget; being the French man he is, Tsukiyama had made dinner and paired it with a fantastic wine that ghouls could drink, laced with blood.

He had gone above and beyond anything I had ever seen and been a part of; rose petals everywhere while bouquets of roses sat in every room and our room was only lit by candles. I found that he was a patient and very loving lover in bed, he never did anything without asking first and kissed every inch of me with as much love as he could. He whispered sweet nothings in my ear as he made love to me in the most incredible way possible, it was unlike anything I had ever felt in my ten years of being sexually active.

Now however, we fucked constantly every day; granted we made love on special occasions and would take turns showing our love for each other but that was for special times. Tsukiyama would come home from work sometimes stressed out to the max and I would take the liberty of shoving him into the living room and fucking him hard and fast on his coffee table. Occasionally we would have lunch together at my work and if I was having a stressful morning , he would fuck me against my desk hard and slow so I couldn't sit still at my desk the rest of the day.

We found that he had an exhibitionist side judging by the many times we had almost been caught at the office and how he couldn't stop touching me under the table whenever we went out with friends. I didn't mind because in the five years I had spent with him, I had fallen so deeply in love with him that I didn't care what he did to me whether it be alone or in a room full of people. I knew I was loved and wanted by him and that's all I needed some days; however, I still had problems of waking up and not being able to remember who I was from time to time. The first few months were hard and terrifying for us both; I was still sleeping alone when I had the first nightmare.

I screamed loudly as the beast tore through my chest in my nightmare and fell to the floor, hyperventilating and unable to clearly see in the dark room. It wasn't two seconds later that Tsukiyama was kicking my door in and in front of me; I had lashed out at him with my kagune, unsure if it was real or not and had almost sliced clear through his arm. He sat against the wall looking at me as I calmed down, not daring to come any closer until I was slightly calmer. I couldn't remember anything and it had been scaring me as I sat there, starring blankly at my wall, "Who am I?"

That's when I felt his arms around me and his shaky breath in my ear, "You are Dorian Moreau. You are twenty three years old and are living in Tokyo Japan. You live in our home with me, Tsukiyama Shuu. You write books and stories online when you aren't at work. You are five foot nine inches." He kept talking in my ear, telling me everything he could about myself and himself, all the reasons he loved me until the sun came up.

All in all, five years had come and gone without much notice; however, Tsukiyama Shuu never failed to surprise me or sweep me off my feet.

"Dorian I"m home!"

I practically leap off our bed at the sound of his voice, not bothering to act like a normal person as I leap over the banister to the bottom floor. Tsukiyama had been away for over two weeks in Russia to handle business from work and I had to stay in Japan due to my own work. I land with ease while looking around for him but couldn't see him from where I was, "Yama?" I walk through the rest of the house still coming up empty; just as I was about to start thinking I was going crazy, I felt arms wrap around my waist and pull me back against a chest, "Bonjour mon amour~."

I laugh as I easily pull back from his arms only to jump back into them, legs wrapped around his waist, "Ciao il mio amore." I wasted no time in pushing my lips against his needily, letting my fingers run through his soft hair as I pulled him deeper into our kiss. His arms held me up with ease, lips moving heatedly with my own as he moved forward towards what I assumed was the living room.

I opened my eyes slightly as he sits on the couch, causing my legs to unhook as I was now straddling his lap, "I missed you Yama, so very much." Tsukiyama chuckles, running his hands up my chest and neck to cup my face gently, "I missed you too Dorian. But everything is fixed up there and my next trip isn't until Christmas when we are going to visit your parents in France." I nuzzle his hand gently, inhaling deeply as I had missed his scent, "Good because the next last minute trip they send you on, I'm going to kill them all."

He laughs heartily, running his thumbs over my cheeks, "Oh my love, that won't be necessary. However we can't sit here much longer because we are going out tonight. I've already planned most of our night out; you ate today right?" I bite my lip nervously, "Um...no I didn't." He sighs, shaking his head, "Go eat, I am going to change and lay something out for you."

I whine, pushing on his chest, "No fair Tsukiyama! I haven't seen you in two weeks, and I mean all of you amore~!" He chuckles, running his slender fingers over my sides, "I know amour but I have plans for us tonight~. Please just do as I ask and I'll reward you once we come home, properly of course." I bite my lip, thinking it over as I rub his chest gently, "Yes sir."

He chuckles, kissing my nose, "Good boy, now run along and hurry please." I nod before getting off his lap and head into the kitchen, deciding not to bother with heating anything up but rather just down a container of random food. I tried my best not to be too fast but I was eager to spend time with Tsukiyama after him being gone so very long. I bound up the stairs two at a time while smiling like a mad man, finding our bedroom door open.

"Yama?" I call out as I step into the room. "Bathroom Dorian." I quickly walk into our bathroom to find a very nicely dressed Tsukiyama; His signature purple suit with a red button up and a royal purple tie, the vest just barely visible behind the coat. I whistle lowly as I eye him up and down, "Damn that is definitely the best suit you own. Even better than the white one from Italy."

He smirks, wrapping his arms around my waist, "Thank you handsome. I brought home a suit tailored to fit you like a glove from one of the best tailors in all of Russia." Giggling, I press a kiss into his chin with a bright smile, "You are without a doubt the best boyfriend in the world." A kiss to my forehead and a slap on my ass, making me to yelp before he responds, "I am aware~. Now then, get dressed, I am most eager to see how well it fits your delectable body."

I blush furiously red as I walk back into the room, pulling my shirt off with ease, "Alright Mr. Bossy~" I slide into the black pants with ease, taking note of how they were almost skin tight but left enough room to leave a little to the imagination. It was paired with a new black leather belt and a pair of shiny black, low rise boots; I felt his eyes raking over my back as I bend over to tie the laces of boots firmly to my feet.

""Like what you see Mr. Shuu~?" I tease lightly, pulling the silver button up over my arms and shoulders before fastening the buttons one at a time before rolling the sleeves up with ease. Tsukiyama chuckles, leaning against the door frame, "I love what I see Mr. Moreau~" The last piece I put on was a black silk vest, leaving the jacket on the bed as I walk towards him while buttoning my vest, "Well last thing is my bright blue hair; slicked back or spiked up?" He looks over my hair for a moment before responding, "Slick back and change out the silver horseshoes in your lip and septum for the blue ones."

I grin before following his advice, making quick work of my stubborn hair and piercings before appearing before him again, "All done amore~." His eyes light up more than usual as he cups my face, "You look spectacular amour~!" I smile again, giving him a gentle kiss, "Okay now that I'm dressed, where the hell are we going you crazy man?" Tsukiyama smirks, kissing my cheek, "It's a surprise silly man, let's get going~."

Usually when we went out we would use a less flashy car because it made me a little uncomfortable for people to stare at the car as I got out or in it. However on nights like this, Tsukiyama drove whatever car he felt like and it would seem he wanted to be super flashy. I slip into the passenger side seat of his bubble gum pink Ferrari, blushing again while putting my seat belt on, "Tell me again why the hell you own this car?" He laughs, starting up the car with ease before pulling out of the garage, "It was a gift from my business partner in America, she thought it'd be hilarious and humiliating but she didn't count on me driving it all the time."

I roll my eyes, lacing my fingers with his gently, "I swear Americans are weird as hell. But it does suit you and your flamboyant personality." He easily weaves through the car laden street, music playing a little louder than usual with my phone plugged in this time, "Have I told you that you have odd taste in music?" I scoff playfully, smacking his arm, "Excuse you sir! I love my music!"

I turn the volume up as the my favorite part comes on;

Bubblegum pink Ferrari, yeah, I'm so bossy
Sneak in like Alonso just to crash your party
People are goin' loco when I'm pullin' up to your party
Don't think about consequences, cause they're never gonna stop me, what?

Tsukiyama bursts into a fit of laughter as I turn the volume back down, "Seriously? Is that the only reason why you listen to that song?" I pout slightly, "No, that song is great! Hater." He smirks, leaning over and kissing me softly, "I am not so hush~." I blush lightly but stop pouting, "Meanie." He only chuckles as he continues to drive down the street with ease; it took a moment before realizing we were in the middle of the city. We parked in a public garage before walking leisurely through the streets, talking about his trip and the craziness at work.

"Hey Yama can we stop by the coffee shop? I feel like we haven't been there in ages!" I squeezed his fingers gently, looking up at him with my signature pleading look. He laughs, kissing my forehead, "Of course my love, whatever you'd like tonight. However there is one more place we have to go before we go to the coffee shop okay?" I nod with a happy smile, "Of course handsome." I had been watching him most of the night as we went from store to store, and something was off about him. He seemed nervous and distant which in turn made me worry about him a great deal.

As we reached the center of the little garden, Tsukiyama came to a stop and gently held both my hands in his. I looked up at him confused but squeezed his hands gently, "Yama what's bothering you?" He sighs, leaning his forehead against mine, "Dorian I love you. I've loved you since the moment I saw you. I usually would avoid getting attached to people because I live abnormally long and most people die when they are destined to go. I don't like opening myself up because no one loves a monster."

I was so confused but it didn't stop me from reaching up to hold his face, "I understand, believe me. After five years with you, I don't see the monster that took my life from me. I see the man who fell in love with me and changed my life, in turn, helped me fall in love with him as well. You are no monster to me Tsukiyama Shuu." He smiles while wrapping his arms around my waist, "Let me finish silly man, even though you are being sweet as hell amour. I have done the exact opposite however; I have fallen so in love with you Dorian. You have made my huge empty house a warm home. My lonely nights a quiet night in. My one night stands into incredible passionate love-making nights. You have given me the chance to create a life in this crazy ever changing world and I don't want to spend another night without you by my side."

I was crying at this point but I didn't care; however, my breath hitches in my throat as he drops down onto one knee, "Yama what are you doing?" He smiles up at me as he pulls out a small white box, "I love you now, tomorrow, the next day and the next for the rest of my life. You are my best friend, my lover, my partner in crime, my mate, my everything mon amour. Dorian Moreau, voulez-vous m'épouser?" The box opens and my breathing stops; inside sets a simple black band with a purple and red gem on the left, a diamond in the middle, and a blue and green gem on the right. (5 gems in total people) It was the most beautiful ring I had ever seen and the love of my life was proposing to me with it.

I couldn't speak but I nod rapidly, trying to stop the tears as he gently slides the ring onto my left finger; it was a perfect fit. Yama scoops me into his arms, laughing as he spins around, "Je t'amie mon amour~!" I smile brightly as I cling to him tightly, "Ti amo amore mio~!" He barely has me on my feet before I'm kissing him deeply and passionately, keeping my arms around his neck.

Tsukiyama Shuu had never felt what love and happiness was like until me. He couldn't feel his heart but I could; it was so cold but I warmed it with my gentle touch. And now, I would spend the rest of our lives making sure he too could feel his heart.

Fin~