Chapter 2 will feature the first appearances of Itachi and the social worker (coughs slug-woman coughs). So, without any lolly-gagging, "Let's get busy!!"
Itachi- Okay, I'm here. So what was so important that I had to make time in my busy schedule to come here?
TG- Hey! Itachi Uchiha's finally here, Ya... Wait a minute. looks around Where's Kisame?!
Itachi- He's busy...
Meanwhile in Hawaii...
Announcer- Now, Welcome to the Maui Annual Surfing-Contest, Kisame Hoshigaki!!
(Crowd cheers as Kisame starts to paddle out)
Back with the author and Itachi...
TG- I only invited you because I thought Kisame would come with you..! sighs dreamily Kisame... starts to drool at daydream of Kisame
Itachi- Hey are you drooling at the thought my boyfreind?!
TG- snaps out of it Wait, do you mean that you two are actually together?
Itachi- nods
TG- mischevious thoughts ( hopefully Kisame will be here soon so I can see these two go at it. Yay! Yaoi! Wait I need to get a camera!) I'll be back, Itachi. runs to store
Itachi- I have the strange feeling that I've gotten myself into a serious bind...
Disclaimer: First two chapters, people.
Itachi Uchiha ran to the dance-school to pick up his younger brother. Ignoring the island heat, he was wearing his favorite overcoat, which was black with red clouds on it. He was running to the Konoha Island dance-school to pick up his younger brother as soon as possible. However, when he got there and he found that the school was empty. "DAMN IT!!!" He roared as he jumped from the porch and started to run back home. He was so much in thought about how he was going to kill Sasuke that he didn't even realize when a black car was about to run him over. "What the hell?!" He exclaimed as the car screeched to a halt. In a flash of anger, Itachi kicks the car with all of his might, leaving a dent, and yelled back, "Watch where you're going, you stupid bitch!!", And runs off. The blonde woman inside of the car rolls the window down and just and just gives an angry sigh as she drives off.
"Sasuke Uchiha, when I get home, you are so dead!!!" Itachi states as he runs up the hill that leads to his and Sasuke's house. When he got to the front door, he tried to open it just to find that it was locked three times over. "Grrr... SASUKE!!" Itachi then tried sticking his head through the dog-door. He succeeds to the point that he can stretch his arm to unlock the three locks. He sighs calmly until he finds out that the door had been nailed shut by his younger brother. He then gets out, "Sasuke! Open the door!" He yells as he bangs on the door. Sasuke replies,
"I want to die..." Itachi then runs to the back all the while yelling to his brother on the inside,
"Sasuke, we don't have time for this! The social-worker's going to be here any minute!" He tries the window, just to find it locked. He sighs exasperatedly and grabs a nearby hammer. Itachi then crawled back through the dog-door and called over to Sasuke, who was lying on the ground, listening to his and his brother's emo cd's, "Sasuke, open the door!" Sasuke replies by raising the volume on the boombox and lip-synching along to the words,
"Stop my breathing and slit my throat, I must be emo..." Itachi then yells and starts taking out all of the nails, not noticing that the blond, female social-worker was walking towards the porch.
"AAAHHH!!! WHEN I GET IN THERE I'M GOING TO KILL YOU, MAIM AND QUARTER YOU, CHOP THOSE PIECES UP, PUT THEM IN THE BLENDER, HIT PUREE, PUT THAT MIXTURE IN A PIE SHELL, BAKE IT, AND FEED IT TO THE SOCIAL-WORKER!! AND WHEN THEY SAY, 'Gee, this is great, what's your secret?', I'M GOING TO SAY...!" Itachi felt himself being pulled out of the dog-door and face to face with a very official-looking woman. He thought for a second and then he continued with, "L-love, compassion, caring..." and stood up, dropping the hammer. The woman then held out her hand for a handshake, while saying,
"Good afternoon, Mr. Uchiha. I'm here from the..."
"Child-services depatment, yes ma'am." Itachi interrupted. The woman cleared her throat at this and continued,
"May I come in?" Itachi looked back at the door, turned back and replied,
"Actually, I thought that we could sit out here and talk.", He then leaned casually against the wall. The woman frowned even more seriously than before and said,
"No." Itachi sighed and said,
"Ah, I see.", He then started for the back door, picking up the hammer before he went, leaving the woman at the door. A couple minutes later there was a crash of a window breaking, then a loud thud of a body falling to a laundry room floor, Itachi's voice muttering a string of curses, then various doors shutting and opening and slamming closed. Suddenly, the music inside of the house stoped.
"Son of a bi-"
"SASUKE UCHIHA, SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!" There was then a frantic running towards the front door. The door cracked as Itachi pulled it open, not at all regarding the nails, and stated, trying to catch his breath, "Welcome to the Uchiha household." The blonde woman walked into the house, pulled out her notebook, and started taking notes on the two brothers' standard of living. "As you can see, we've been doing just fine and..." Itachi stopped his comment when he smelt something. "Excuse me, but do you smell something... burning?" The blonde replied,
"It's coming from the kitchen..." The blonde-woman stated. Itachi screamed,
"Damn it!!", as he ran into the kitchen. The woman walked in just in time to see Itachi turning off the stove. As the black smoke rose into the air, the social worker asked, taking out her notebook,
"I take it that he doesn't cook by himself often." Itachi blurted out,
"He only burns things when I leave him home alone for some reaso..." He stopped as he saw the social worker writing his statements down. She walked out to the living-room and saw Sasuke doing something kind of disturbing. He had a jar of pickle juice, a knife, a book called "Beginner's Voodoo", a bandage, and a group of voodoo dolls that looked like a certain group of school-students. The blonde woman watched silently as Sasuke put the dolls in the jar, cut his hand with the knife and let the blood drip down into the jar. He then wrapped his hand up and closed the jar back up. He then picked the jar up and started shaking it. Itachi had come in the room and was shaking his head,
"Why today?" He sighed silently. When Sasuke sensed someone behind him, he turned and saw the social-worker and his older brother. He then very clamly stated,
"My freinds need to be punished." The woman turned to Itachi who simply turned his head away. She walked over to the younger Uchiha and started, holding out her hand,
"Hello Sasuke, As you've probably realized I'm the social worker." Sasuke replied,
"Do you have a name, Ms. Social Worker?" She replied,
"Well, I prefer to keep my name on a need-to-know basis." At this time, Sasuke grabbed both of her hands and looked at the tattoos on her knuckles. He then stated,
"Your knuckles say "Tsunade", then one says "The", then a picture of a slug, then a picture of a woman." Tsunade clenched her hands into a fist as Sasuke released her hands. "Tsunade the Slug-Woman?" Tsunade replied,
"Tsunade will be just fine Sasuke." She started as she once again got out her notebook. "Now I'm just going to ask you a few questions, okay?" Sasuke nodded. "Are you happy with your current environment?" Sasuke muttered,
"Hell no...", until he saw Itachi behind Tsunade, glaring daggers at him. He then flashed a fake smile and started, "I'm adjusted. I eat three square meals a day..." At this time, Itachi was acting out all the things for Sasuke to say behind Tsunade. "Take long naps and... get disciplined?" At this time Itachi had punched his hand into his fist. He quickly saw his mistake and frantically gestured for Sasuke to correct his statement. Sasuke gave a "What the fuck?"-look as he stated, "No..? Not disciplined..." Tsunade just then turned to Itachi, who immediately stopped his actions. She then turned to Sasuke, who was looking at the jar again, and said,
"Well it was nice meeting you Sasuke, and if you ever need me here's my card." Tsunade handed over the piece of paper and Sasuke took it without once looking away from the jar. She then turned to Itachi and said, with a serious tone, "Mr. Uchiha, if you please.", and the two walked to the front door. Tsunade started, "You know... If at anytime me or the state thinks that you can't handle this..." Itachi interrupted her,
"Me and him are just fine, It won't come to that." Tsunade turned towards the door and stated,
"I hope not." Tsunade pulled the door opened, almost ripping it off the hinges. "Mr. Uchiha." She said as she left. Itachi watched her leave and when her car was gone... He calmly closed the door the best that he could and then he turned and gave the classic "I am going to kill you"-look to Sasuke, who was now standing in the hallway. 3..2..1...
"Oh shit!"
"SASUKE UCHIHAAA!!!!" Itachi yelled as he ran over and grabbed his younger brothers arm, very roughly. He started yelling at him, shaking him some, "WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?! Do you want to make this harder than it already is?! Do you not understand our current situation?! Do you want to be taken away?!" Sasuke replied,
"No!"
"No, you don't understand?!"
"No!"
"No, you don't want to be taken away?!"
"No!"
"No, what?!"
"NO!!!" Sasuke screamed as he fell to the ground on his face. There was a mumbling coming from Sasuke. Itachi leaned into listen but was so angry that he gave up and yelled,
"I don't get why you just won't listen to me! God, you're such a baka!" Sasuke got up and stated,
"Well if you hate me so much, why don't you just put me in an orphanage and go but a weasel?!" Itachi yelled back as he was walking away,
"Well at least a weasel would listen to me better than you!!" Sasuke started walking up the stairs and replied,
"Well maybe the weasel will be a kwow-it-all jackass like a certain !"
"And it'll be quieter!!"
"And it'll be an emo-bastard, like you!!" Sasuke yelled from the door of his bedroom. Itachi yelled,
"Go to your room!"
"I'm already in my room!!" Itachi then grabbed a pillow spressed his face to it anbd screamed as much as he could into it. Meanwhile, Sasuke did the same inside his room.
One hour later...
"Hey." Itachi said as he walked into Sasuke's room with something for him to eat. "I brought you some pizza." He said as he sat down next to Sasuke on the bed. Sasuke was looking at a picture of the Uchiha family before the accident. He then said to Itachi,
"We're a broken family, aren't we?" Itachi replied,
"No! Well... Maybe a little..." He slumped into the bed, "Maybe a lot." They both sighed. After a while, Itachi broke the silence, "You know, I don't yell at you because I like it. Because if I actually had a choice I would save my energy for something more rewarding." Sasuke replied,
"Like getting a boyfreind?" Itachi blushed as he started tickling Sasuke and saying,
"Shut up Sasuke, or else I'll tickle you until you stop breathing!" Sasuke was actually laughing as his brother was tickling him. When Itachi stopped, Sasuke was trying to catch his breath. He then called over to Yami who brought over his camera.
"My camera's full again, nii-san." Itachi took the camera and assured that he would develop it whenever he got the chance. They sat there remembering the old days when suddenly... There was a black-out. They looked around the darkness until there was a bright, green light from outside. Itachi looked out the window a little confused by the eerie light until Sasuke exclaimed, "A shooting-star! I call it!!" Sasuke started to push Itachi while saying, "Get out, get out, I have to make my wish!!" Itachi smirked as he replied,
"Oh no! Gravity collapsing on me!" Sasuke groaned,
"No, it isn't!!"
"Yes it is Sasuke, the same thing happened yesterday." Itachi fell on Sasuke, who cried,
"Get off! Your big butt is crushing me!!" Sasuke scrambled from under his older brother. Right before he slammed the door on him, he yelled, "Why are you so damn weird?", then slammed the door so hard that it actually hit Itachi on the head. After a minute, he opened the door a little bit so that he could hear his younger brother. "Hey there God, or whoever the hell it is up there. It's me, Sasuke Uchiha. I know I haven't really prayed or anything since my parents died but I am now. Look, to put it frankly, My life is crap! So right now I'm going by the whole, "Misery loves company"-rule, and asking, can you send me someone who won't constatly make fun of me?" Itachi listened to his younger brother until he went to sleep. He then thought long and hard about what he had said, even after he himslef and gone to bed.
Meanwhile...
At the sight of the "shooting-star" crash, "Kyuubi" jumped out of the wreckage that was his ship and let out an evil laugh. He walked out of the ship and foward for a while until a raindrop fell on his head. He growled as he shot one of his guns up in the air. Another rain drop. He shot his other gun into the sky. It started pouring. "Kyuubi" just growls as he gets soaked by the rain. There was a ribbit. A frog was sitting in the middle of the nearby road. The blonde ran over and started poking the frog with a gun. "Heh-heh. It's squishy..." Just then, A giant 18-wheeler truck drove up and crashed into "Kyuubi". The truck immediately stopped and the driver and passenger jumped out.
"What did we hit?!" The first one asked the second, who shook his head as he turned on his flashlight. When the light found "Kyuubi's" body, they both shuddered at the sight of the young man. "I think we should call somebody." The first one suggested.
TG- Chapter three's finally done! I'm so happy, Yay!
Itachi- Quit saying "Yay".
TG- Fine. Banzai!!
Itachi- Oh Lord...
TG- Well sorry these two chapters took so long, But I promise to write more often if I get more reviews!
Itachi- So, press that little purple button down there or else you'll get a taste of the Mangekyou eyes turn red.
TG- Itachi, don't threaten them. sighs Well, until next time...
-Tyranno's girl