iHave Conflicted Feelings

Author's Note: I guess that I'm just feeling really creative today. Whatever works, right? This chapter gets slightly raunchy, but I'm hoping that I won't have to change the rating, because it only hints at certain themes :P

ยป Kristen Nicole

Disclaimer: I do not own or pretend to own iCarly, or any of Dan Schneider's characters. I just love writing about them!

"Aaand, that's how you explode a fire cracker in mid-air using a slingshot!" Carly chimed.

"Thank you, thank you!" Sam bowed multiple times for the camera.

"Well, that just about wraps up our show!" Carly smiled. "'Til next time...be healthy!"

Freddie zoomed in on Carly and Sam.

"Eat your milk," Sam whispered. "And drink your vegetables!" Carly finished.

"Later!" both girls waved.

"And, we're clear," Freddie declared.

"Is it just me, or was that like the longest show ever?" Sam remarked as she fanned herself with her hand.

"Actually, the longest show to date was the iCarly Web Awards, so no," Freddie responded.

"Shut it, Fredweird, no one asked you," she hissed, peeling a banana.

Carly was pretty quiet. She didn't have much to say; a few days had passed since she'd decided to kiss Freddie, when he had insisted that they keep things "professional"...whatever that meant. The suspense of not knowing what was to come was driving her insane, and she definitely couldn't handle being in the same small room with just those two.

"I vote Groovy Smoothie!" she called, rushing out the door and down the stairs.

Sam and Freddie simply sat there looking after her.

"What up with Carly? She's been like this all week," Sam examined.

"Who knows," he shrugged. "Didn't you tell me she was depressed from a bunch of boy problems?" he prompted innocently.

"No kidding, dipchizz. I'm saying there's something more that's bothering her, something big," she tossed her banana peel across the room and into the trash bin.

"Cool it, Puckett, I'm just asking questions," he glared.

"Yeah? Well, they're stupid ones," Sam raised her eyebrows in his general direction.

"Nope, sorry Sam. There's no such thing as a stupid question."

"...Really?" her tone suddenly became quiet and serious.

"Really, really..." he responded, all traces of anger having left his voice.

Carly was growing very impatient. What is taking them so long? She wondered. She was about to go back up there, when Spencer walked into the room.

"Hey, kiddo. Long time no talk. Kinda miss you," he hugged her.

"Yeah, me too. Been busy..." she trailed off, not offering an explanation.

"Listen, Carls," Spencer began.

"Yeah?" she fell onto the couch.

"Sam and Freddie know that something's up, and so do I. You gotta tell me what's going on in that pretty little head of yours right now. It's not healthy to keep everything to yourself, you know?" he patted her head.

At first, Carly thought that she was going to keep from telling Spencer, but she soon realized that she needed a release, and it suddenly all just came out.

"Freddie told me he might like Sam. Or that Sam might like him. Or both. Then I kissed him. A year after he stopped liking me, I kissed him, and he pushed me away. He told me that he wanted to keep everything 'professional' for the show. He didn't want me anymore. Now that he's everything to me, I'm not enough for him," she began crying.

Spencer pulled her close to him. "Aw Carls, I'm sorry. I think you're wrong, though. Freddie's been in love with you from the beginning. Why would he choose Sam over you? She treats him like dirt..."

"I know! I know she does. But that's the thing. Maybe he prefers the bad-girl type, you know? Like, maybe I'm too frilly and lacy for him...and now he wants leather and studs. That's not me; that's Sam. It's not fair, I'm too good and nice!"

"There, there, that's a good little Carly. I'm sure it'll all work out. After all, he and Sam might have small crushes, but it'll never last. They'll never take each other seriously. If I were Freddie, I'd pick you in a heartbeat," he rubbed her back lightly in a comforting guesture.

"Thanks, Spence," she said between sobs.

"No stupid questions..." Sam repeated, more to herself than anything. "Okay," she took a deep breath. "How did you feel that night we kissed on the fire escape?"

That caught him way off guard. "Kiss? I, uh...it was...like I said before, nice."

"That's it? Just...nice?" she questioned.

"Yes, Sam. Nice," he rolled his eyes.

At this, Sam stood up and walked slowly towards him. Carly might not be okay with making the first move, but Sam certainly had no objections. "Nice enough to want a redo?"

Freddie's eyes widened as Sam got closer and closer. She wasn't just walking; somehow she had a certain stride to her...a very sensual one. Freddie was not accustomed to that kind of attention.

Her proximity made him a little nervous, so he slowly backed up until he was sitting on Carly's mattress.

That didn't stop her, though. Instead, she used this to his advantage. Determined to get another kiss, she pushed him back a bit, then climbed into his lap where her eyes met his.

She then took off her grungy jacket, revealing a satin camisole.

Freddie didn't know what to think. "No, Sam. I really don't want..."

"Don't say anything," she instructed, silencing his lips with her own.

Freddie's first thought was inevitably to compare the girls' kissing styles. Carly was timid and soft, while Sam was rough and confident. He didn't have much time to contemplate, though, because she began roaming his newly toned body with her fingers. Her touch awakened crazy sensations that Freddie had never felt before, and he didn't know how to react.

He pulled away for a moment. "This is so different from the first time," he observed breathlessly.

Sam only smirked in response. "I know."

"We need to stop. I don't want to do this with you. Get up," he demanded, though not terribly forcefully.

"I know, I know, you love Carls, I get it. But she's not the one kissing you, is she?"

Freddie looked to the floor and shook his head.

She interlocked her fingers within his, and pushed his body back onto the bed so that she was laying on top of him.

Freddie could feel her every curve, and as time went on, his kisses became hungrier and hungrier, and Sam definitely kept up with him.

His vision blurred, and though this new world of sensuality felt incredible, he wasn't entirely convinced that he wouldn't rather be experiencing this with Carly.

"I think I'm gonna go find them. It's been fifteen minutes; it doesn't take that long to get down here. They've had enough time for two fights." Carly finally got up, wiping the remnants of her tears from her eyes.

Spencer nodded, and retreated to the kitchen for a can of Peppy Cola.

When Carly reached her room, the sight almost caused her to lose her lunch. She gripped onto the door frame for support, or else she would have fallen. After some major hyperventilating, she finally crossed the bridge from panicked and distraught to angry.

"Really, Freddie, I don't think that that's how you keep things professional. Or do those rules not apply when you're with another girl in my bed?" she yelled.

"C-Carly," Freddie coughed.

"Up. Out. Now!" she pointed to her door.

"But Carls," Sam stopped in front of her, shrugging he jacket over her shoulders.

"Go!" Carly didn't waver.

Silently, the two retreated downstairs.

Carly threw herself onto her bed and resumed sobbing, not falling asleep for more hours than she could count.