Dear Sherlock,
I'm tired of this, living without you. I'd like to die, but I feel an obligation to keep living. So I keep living. I think it's, stupidly, because I can't help but expect you to come back soon. My therapist says that's normal, but I need to find a reason to keep living. I haven't found a real motivation yet.
You were my motivation, once upon a time. I felt like you needed me. And it was fun. You were fun. You were...amazing. Now I feel like a void has opened up inside me. Please, come fill that void. I need you, Sherlock. I need you to walk through that door or I'll lose myself.
You never do.
I lost myself a long time ago. I'm just a hole now. It started at my heart. Now it's grown to engulf my entire torso. Someday, I just won't be here anymore.
John H. Watson