The team burst out of the room firing in all directions. Walter was quite glad he was in the middle of the group – he could leave it to the experts now. He came out of the door firing the zat as fast as he could– into the opposite wall.
"Harriman!" shouted Jack. "What are you doing?"
Well, there could have been Jaffa there, Walter grumbled to himself as he turned to fire in the correct direction, and managed to hit a couple of the Jaffa. The team advanced along the corridor, the team firing in all directions as they bunched up at a corner. The Jaffa seemed to be advancing from everywhere – they really didn't want SG-1 to go anywhere.
"Bright ideas anyone?" yelled Daniel as he loaded a magazine into his pistol.
"Just keep firing! There can't be that many of them!" shouted Sam as he took down another wave of armoured Jaffa.
Walter was suddenly struck by a brainwave. He stopped firing the zat, knelt down and started pulling items out of his rucksack.
"Sergeant Harriman, I believe it would be unwise to search for sustenance at this time!" shouted Teal'c.
I'm not looking for food, grumbled Walter internally. He ducked as rounds flew past them in the corridor. His hands found the objects he had been searching for and he pulled them out of the rucksack. It was a pair of radios. He tossed one down a corridor and into a corner as they ran past. He then pulled out the other one and turned the volume to maximum.
"Harriman!" shouted Jack. "What are you doing?"
"Distraction, sir!" Walter yelled back. "The radios can be very loud on maximum – it'll sound like we're in two places at once."
"That would be handy..." Jack muttered under his breath.
"Actually, sir, that wouldn't be possible, as entropic cascade failure would..." Sam was cut off in mid babble by Walter beginning to speak into the radio.
"Erm... She sells sea shells on the sea shore... Tom's old aunt sat on her coat and hat... Erm... Chevron ten will not lock..."
Walter kept up the drivel as they sprinted down more endless corridors. Unbelievably, thought Jack, this does seem to be working. The Jaffa are actually going the other way.
"... Unauthorised inbound chocolate bars... please don't eat the gateroom..."
Jack shook his head. Walter had clearly lost it in the heat of combat.
"O'Neill! The exit is ahead!" Teal'c brought Jack back to reality as he squeezed of his final rounds towards the Jaffa guarding the entrance.
"… Open the iris... I'll take a pretty picture with it..." Walter was once again interrupted, this time by a roar of rage from somewhere behind. Oops. Looks like they've found the radio.
"Ok Harriman – enough of the nonsense! I take it you brought a detonator and a GDO with you in that bag of tricks?"
"Yes sir!" Walter replied as they ran out of the doors of the mothership and back into the sunlit forest.
"Wait until we're a good distance away, then blow it. Give the GDO to Daniel. Now, time for the famous SG-1 manoeuvre - the 'run like hell'."
The five sprinted into the clearing that held the Stargate, energy blasts flying around them from the Jaffa, hot on their tail. They'd blown the mothership to small pieces a few minutes ago. Unfortunately, this made the Jaffa ever more determined to find them. SG-1 sprinted for their lives while firing over their shoulders, now all on their last magazines of ammunition. Walter simply sprinted for his life.
The Jaffa came into the clearing proper when they were still about fifty meters from the gate. Jack started barking out instructions.
"Sam, take the left. Teal'c take right. Daniel, send the IDC code. Walter, dial it up!"
Walter ran over and skidded behind the console, by this point not even thinking about ducking for energy blasts, but doing it automatically anyway. He slammed down the first glyph on the DHD.
"Chevron one encoded!"
He hit the next glyph.
"Chevron two encoded!"
Jack closed his eyes and counted to five before turning around.
"Harriman!" shouted Jack. "What are you doing?"
Walter looked up and saw at least a whole platoon of armoured, dangerous and very angry Jaffa storming towards them, and decided that he might be able to shorten his beloved dial sequence a little.
"Chevrons three, four, five, six and seven encoded!" yelled Walter as he punched the next glyphs in quick succession, looking up to see the wormhole blossom into shape in front of them.
"Fall back to the gate!" shouted Jack as the team rolled out from their hiding places behind rocks and started one last dash for the gate. Jack saw Walter hovering at the mouth of the wormhole.
"Harriman!" shouted Jack. "What are you doing?"
"I'm not going without you, sir!" Walter yelled back as they all jumped through the gate together.
"Offworld wormhole is connecting!" shouted an unfamiliar voice into the intercom as General Hammond jogged down the stairs. He didn't recognise the technician at the console – and his catchphrases really weren't as good as Walter's. Not that he was planning on telling Walter that, right now – if he ever could.
"SG-1's IDC, sir. Opening the iris." Hammond raised his eyebrows as he hurried into the gateroom. Maybe Walter had come through after all?
The four members of SG-1 stumbled through, with Walter in their midst. As the iris slid shut behind him, General Hammond walked up to the team.
"Well done SG-1, and well done Sergeant Harriman. You will be pleased to know there will be no punishment for disobeying orders and rescuing SG-1 - the president decided it would be a special case."
Jack punched Walter on the shoulder playfully as he walked down the ramp. "Well done, Chevron Guy..."
Sam and Daniel both thanked Walter profusely while they gave their weapons to the waiting Airman. Teal'c solemnly bowed to Walter.
"Sergeant Harriman, you have proved yourself a courageous and brave warrior, as well as master of the gate. You have my gratitude."
"I suppose you'll be wanting to join SG-1 now? General, can we find room for a fifth member?" asked Jack, jokingly.
"Well, thanks, guys, but I think I'll stick to being 'master of the gate', if you don't mind - less dangerous..." said Walter as they left the gateroom. Then he paused and realised something.
Walter groaned and smacked his head.
"What?" the four members of SG-1 asked, turning back.
"I said chevron seven was encoded, not locked..."
Fini.
A/N: Yes, I know, ridiculous, but I couldn't resist. He's such a fun guy to write for! Back to serious stories...