Chapter 3: Real first kiss.

Felicity tried not to think about the kiss but she can't and within two weeks it's too much to bear. No matter how hard she tried she couldn't get that kiss out of her head or the want of that kiss and it was killing her.

"You ok?" Diggle asks softly.

She knows that she has been acting differently and she is seriously trying not too but it's hard and emotions not matter how much people like to think they are really hard to get over.

She wants to say yes but Diggle knows her well enough to see threw her lies.

"Nope." she says and tears build in her eyes.

Diggle gathers her into his arms.

"You can talk to me you know." he tells her softly.

Felicity nods into his arms but says nothing, knowing if she did Diggle would get mad at Oliver and she doesn't want that because it wasn't his fault any more than it was hers.

"I just need to go home." She begs Diggle who nods.

"Go." he tells her.

Felicity gathered her bag and headed to the exit.

She avoids work and the lair for two days straight. Originally only sending a message to Dig to say she is fine she just wants a couple of days to myself. That doesn't stop any of them from calling but she ignores the calls.

Diggle is the first to call right after her text. She wants to answer but she knows if she does she will tell him everything and she didn't think she could handle that. So she sends Diggle a text tell him she is fine she just tried and needs a couple of days to rest.

Oliver is next to call but he doesn't leave a message just sending a couple of texts asking if she is ok.

Sara's message makes her want to cry.

"I know we haven't know each other that long but you mean a lot to me Felicity and if you ever need to talk and I mean ever no matter what time of day I will always be here for you." Sara tells her.

Felicity sends Sara a message back telling her that she loves her and that she is very thankful to have a friend like her.

Roy is the last to text but she is happy that he does.

Hey Blondie, you doing ok? Everyone is worried, especially big boss. He is freaking out.

Big boss was what Roy had nick named Oliver and why she doubted Oliver was freaking out, she does text him back telling him she is fine.

It's a lie and she is pretty sure they all know it.

Oliver paced in the foundry on the third night. He hated not knowing what was going on with Felicity, hated that she had been different ever since the night he had kissed her.

"So she hasn't told anyone anything?" he questions his team.

They all shake their head. It's unlike Felicity not to talk to anyone of them.

"What happened that night?" Diggle asks.

Oliver looks over at him begging him not to make him go over it but Diggle gives him a hard look and Oliver knows he has got no choice but to tell him.

"There was nowhere to hide without getting caught." Oliver reasoned.

Diggle nods in acceptance waiting for him to continue.

Oliver sighed.

"I only meant to make it look like we were kissing but..." Oliver explains but stops as the sound of her gasp echoes through his head.

The feel of her lips on his and Oliver has to physically shake that memory from his head.

Someone clears their throat and Oliver looks over at his team.

"I couldn't help it." Oliver argued.

"You kissed her?" Sara asks in disbelief.

Oliver looks away as he nods.

Diggle walks towards him.

"Oliver?" He calls Oliver looks up.

Diggle looks mad.

"Felicity is in love with you and you kissed her to keep you cover." Diggle raged.

Oliver shook his head.

"It wasn't like that." Oliver argued.

"What was it like then?" Diggle demanded.

Oliver sighed.

"Kissing Felicity had nothing to do with keeping our bloody cover, I did it because I wanted too." Oliver yelled in his defence.

Diggle smirked at Oliver's unusual outburst of emotion.

"But she doesn't know that." Sara points out.

Oliver looks over at her and everything sinks in. By kissing her for what she believed was cover, he had hurt her.

On the third night she is so unsure that she can't live being around Oliver that she starts packing her things. She knows it's stupid and foolish and she probably won't leave but she has to do something to keep herself from thinking about him.

She is so engrossed in packing that she doesn't hear him enter her house.

"You're leaving?" he asks, his deep voice making her jump.

She turns to look at him. His eyes wide as he looks round the room, eyes settling on her open suitcase.

"What are you doing here?" she demands, suddenly furious that his hasn't respect her need to be left alone.

"You're leaving?" he asks again completely ignoring her question.

Felicity moves to go past him, if he doesn't feel the need to answer her then she doesn't feel the need to look at him anymore. But he grabs her arm and stops her.

"Answer me Felicity." He orders and she huffs.

Felicity can see that he is angry but she doesn't care. She continues to try and move around him but each time he just pulls her back again.

"That's none of your business." She shouts back.

Oliver steps closer to her almost crowding her and Felicity moves back until her back hits her bedroom door.

"Talk to me." He begs his tone different almost begging.

It breaks Felicity and she hates herself for it.

She meets his eyes for the first time since he got here.

"I can't do this anymore." She whispers fresh tears falling down her cheeks.

His hand goes to her cheek and her eyes fly open.

"Do what?" he asks softly trying to understand what the hell is going with her.

Felicity looks away from him, she wants nothing more than to run and hide because it's humiliating knowing he would never feel the same, but she knows Oliver would never let her.

"You shouldn't have kissed me." She says fiercely.

She can fill Oliver tense up. She can fill him closing himself off, just like he does every time something even remotely emotional between the two of them is brought up.

"Is that what this is about?" he asks surprising her.

Felicity ignores his question, she hates how vulnerable he makes her feel.

Oliver gently pulls her chin up so she is looking at him in the eyes.

"You shouldn't have kissed me." Felicity repeats, silently begging him to let this go.

"Why?" he asks.

"I know why you did it, I do." Felicity points out and she really does.

"I mean we were in trouble and we need to escape and we couldn't which left us with little option but couldn't you have just faked it?" She asked desperate.

"You should have faked it, it wouldn't hurt this much if you faked it." Felicity babbled, desperate tears back in her eyes.

Felicity closes her eyes and puts her hand to her mouth realising what she just said, she wishes the ground would swallow her up but it still wouldn't change what she just said.

Oliver looks at her in disbelief. Here is this incredible, smart beautiful women and she has no idea how much she means to him or even just how amazing she is.

"Felicity." Her name falls from his mouth without his control and her eyes instantly open again.

Oliver loves her eyes. How the change with each and every emotion.

Oliver looks down at her hoping that she can somehow understand how he feels about her without having to actually tell her, but when she looks away unsure and he knows she hasn't.

"You think that kiss was completely faked?" he asks in disbelief and Felicity nods.

Oliver sighs frustrated.

"Of course it was, I mean why else would you kiss me like that. I'm not gorgeous Laurel or feisty I can take care of myself Sara. I'm just me, IT girl extraordinary." Felicity told him, saying the last bit as if it's nothing.

Oliver curses.

"Dam it Felicity." He mutters.

He can't take her thinking so little of himself so he does the only thing he can to make her understand and kisses her.

This kiss is different than their first it's slow and deliberate with so much passion. Her lips are soft against his, he uses his hand to cradle her cheek so gently, but it's short, sweet and over far too quickly.

Felicity whimpers when he pulls away and Oliver sighs, fighting everything within him not to take her back to her room and so her just how much she is the one he wants.

"And that's the problem." He whispers before pressing one last kiss to her forehead.

Oliver leave's quickly after, knowing if he stays their relationship will change forever and he isn't ready for that and he is not sure he will ever be.