A/N: Sorry guys, this one took a longer time to write. It's a slow and painful process for B&E. I know people are often looking for "lemons" right off the start but I'm so thankful to have a group of readers who are willing to go along with me through story. Currently I have five favorites and five story alerts for this story. Once again, everytime I see that someone's added me to their list, I get so excited, I think I literally squealed last time when I got two reviews. This chapter gets a bit more complicated. You'll see =)

Chapter 3

Alone. I found myself all alone in a dark empty space. No matter how many times I blinked my eyes, I couldn't get them to adjust to the darkness. I was crawled up on the floor, my senses heightened to the max to the unknown surrounding. I wanted to cry out for help, ask someone to save me, to take me into the light. But somehow, I had a feeling no one would hear me, that my voice had betrayed me at the most critical time. And I was afraid. Afraid that even if I did cry out, the wrong person would hear me. Someone who had put me in the darkness in the first place…

"Isabella…" a voice whispered. I gasped, shaking uncontrollably in fear of who was there with me. "Sweetheart," it didn't seem genuine, a strained, ominous female voice spoke out to me, "Your Isabella Dwyer," the voice echoed throughout the room.

"Bella, honey," I turned my head around searching for the voice, a different voice, a more calm and doting voice… but it seemed the same as the last, the resonance of the voice… I just couldn't tell. "We're a real family. Charlie's your daddy, remember that sweetheart."

"Bella, your mom won't be back for a while…" my eyes suddenly welled with tears. I remembered those words distinctly. From Charlie… his voice so sullen, so broken, so empty.

There was a growing chatter behind me though I couldn't see, I could only hear. A group of women, whispering discreetly, "Did you hear about Renee? That crazy finally left. I was wondering how long until they had to send her off some place."

"Yeah poor child though. And goodness Charlie must be a mess."

I was convulsing with tears, unable to catch my breath and shaking erratically. I screamed out in torturous pain from the overwhelming utterance of voices of my past. My throat strained from the screeching noise that emerged from within. But they wouldn't stop. The voices, the darkness.

Then suddenly it all ceased. I was drained, the room was now a blinding white. I was soaking with sweat in a sheer white gown and I felt myself fading away…

"Bella! Bella! Wake up! It's just a dream. Come on. Bella!" I heard a voice in the distance. Another familiar voice, but not one from the past.

Help. That's all I wanted to say. Pick me up off this cold ground, out of this room. Perhaps maybe even out of this world. I felt myself breathing heavily, soaked with perspiration as my eyes began to flutter.

Seconds later another voice chimed in, "Get her a cold towel and grab my bag in the office!" I slowly regained my senses seeing a slight blur of blonde hair in front of me and feeling myself limp and lifeless in the arms of someone.

"I'm… I'm not Isabella Dwyer, she had to leave, I'm okay, I just… I have to go away, I-" I began to mumble incoherent thoughts, still disoriented from my dream. It was a dream… right?

But it felt like someone had played a tape recording of my past, mocking me, trying to pull me back into the dark.

"Shh, you're okay. I just need you to wake yourself up. Can you sit up a bit?" I felt my back slowly being lifted into a sitting position. I adjusted my eyes and looked around the room. I almost passed out again seeing so many faces in front of me. Carlisle, Esme, Emmett and a blonde bombshell with a stern look on her face, Alice and a young gentleman with a calming presence, and Edward. My eyes almost bulged out of their sockets staring in shock at the many faces that I was sure were judging me by now.

"Okay everyone go back downstairs. Bella just needs a little space." Carlisle pointed towards the door and one by one every one left the room in silence. Except him. His eyes lingered on mine and slowly worked its way down my body as if he was assessing the state of condition I was in.

"Here." His voice was strained and his body stiff as he handed Carlisle what seemed like a wet hand towel and a case of pills. Not once did his eyes leave mine. I looked at him with questioning eyes. You don't know anything. Go away. And as if he read my mind, he immediate jerked away and stormed out of the room. Super senses…

I felt a brush of coolness across my forehead as Carlisle began to dab it with the towel. "Another bad dream? Maybe the floor wasn't the best place to take a nap," he smiled.

"I- I don't know what happened. I made it to the room and he left and then I blacked out…" My voice was still faint from all the startle.

"Who?" Carlisle raised his eyebrow.

"Um… Ed… Edward. He brought me to the room and um…" I avoided his gaze as he placed the towel down. My eyes caught the attention of the case of pills sitting between us.

He immediately noticed the direction of my eyes and picked it up. "These, I'd much prefer if you didn't have to take them right now. You took some this morning didn't you." It was more of a statement than a question. I simply nodded.

"Would you like to go sit in the den for a little while? I'd say getting a bit of fresh air would be a good idea but the weather isn't really accommodating outside. But the den offers a great view of the backyard, clear your mind a little," he patted my shoulder and helped me up.

He led me towards the door but I abruptly stopped in my track. I looked down at my appearance, my white cotton long-sleeve wrinkled and damp. I ran my hand through my hair now tangled and also damp releasing the strawberry scent of my shampoo.

"Would you like a change of clothing? I'm sure Alice has plenty to spare. In fact, I know that Alice has a closet full of untouched clothes," the kind and gentle man chuckled.

"Um, would that be too much trouble? I don't want to bother her, I could just wear whatever she has, a sweatshirt or something." I fidgeted with my hands, slightly blushing.

"Oh no, no, no Bella. I should warn you, Alice might go a little overboard with offering you with her clothes. You just watch," he winked and I followed him out the door and into the hallway. I looked up to make sure I wouldn't bump into Carlisle but I did just that. Because he came into view again.

Edward seemed to head towards us but didn't look up. He ran his fingers through his hair in such a strenuously motion, it almost looked painful.

"Edward is Alice in her room? Or should I say is Alice not preoccupied with Jasper long enough to let Bella borrow a shirt."

Edward look stunned, a flinch of his face notifying the displeasure in imagining his sister being "preoccupied" in her room with who I imagined must have been the man standing next to her earlier. "Yeah I think she's in her room. I wouldn't trust going in there though. Do you just want a sweatshirt of mine for the meanwhile?" the question seemed so casual, but I've always thought of wearing a man's clothing as an intimidate gesture.

"Bella? Would that be too uncomfortable for you? Actually I could always ask Esme," Carlisle turned towards the stairs but my response came faster than I expected.

"No it's fine!" the two men both faced me with a similar grin on their faces "I don't want to bother anyone. I'm really fine with whatever, not like I'm going out anywhere." I immediately bit my lip trying to draw all my anxiety into the pain that I was inflicting on myself by piercing through my skin. I almost lost myself at the thought of self inflicted pain but my lip was pulled out from my teeth by a smooth, cool touch of someone's fingertips. I gasped at the contact my hands immediately went to my lips. I lifted my gaze to see Edward's eyebrows furrowed and staring at me with concern.

"You really shouldn't do that." It wasn't a suggestion. It seemed more like an order, like a command. His voice was stern yet it was still a luxurious velvet resonance ringing through my ears.

Carlisle cleared his throat drawing me out of any further awe of the creature standing before me. Perfection sought after every inch of his body, his presence. Even his ability to stir actual emotions within me. That part made me unsettled. I felt unnerved and somewhat angry that I wasn't able to keep myself in check in front of him. Or practically anyone in this house for that matter…

"Edward why don't you give her one of your shirts for the meanwhile and Bella I'd like to talk to you in the den in a little bit. I'll give you some time to yourself." With that said, Carlisle softened in his doctor demeanor and offered a sympathetic smile.

"My room's back down the hallway." Without missing another beat he walked down the hallway and opened the door exactly opposite of the room I was in. Realization struck me then that he would've heard everything from behind the doors. He would've heard my frantic mumbling and heart wrenching screams first. He was the closest person that heard my crying out for help. And surely, he would have come into my room first. He was the closest thing I had… for any hope of being saved, taken out of my dream.

"Bella! Bella! Wake up! It's just a dream. Come on. Bella!" I heard a voice in the distance. Another familiar voice, but not one from the past.

I gasped at the vision of my now conscious mind. It was him. There was no other voice like his, none as smooth and comforting even through the evident distress in his voice at the time. Without knowing words slipped out of my mouth. "You."

Edward stopped dead in his tracks, glaring into my eyes with an ice cold look. He was so hot and cold. Perhaps I have finally met someone who could match my inability to sustain one state of mind. "Come in and grab a shirt." Yet another commanding tone.

I absentmindedly took my steps to his door. I hesitated whether or not I should actually go in.

"I said come in and grab a shirt didn't I?" Alright, now he sounded like an ass.

I looked around his room. Clean and orderly. A bed in the corner by the window, a black desk with an assortment of books, a shelf above the desk with an impressive collection of CD's it seemed like. The walls were painted a beautiful shade of blue, not too dark, not too light. Then something caught me off guard, a keyboard sitting in front of his window. Unknowingly, an image of Edward came to mind…sitting on a chair looking out at the world through the window, telling the story of his soul through the music he makes with the touch of his fingers against the coolness of the black and white keys. My eyes moved away from that area and landed directly on Edward. I felt a tug at my heart and a gasp escaped from my lips.

"I think I'm fine." I turned away, not trusting myself to stay in his sight nor have him be in mine. Suddenly I felt my armed tugged back as I stumbled backwards into his room. He tensely shut the door.

"You're soaked in sweat in a white shirt. You know I can see through everything. I'm sure you could use something to cover up." He never let go of the grasp he hand on my arm and the double meaning behind his words didn't go unnoticed.

I shrugged out of his grasp and I gave a look of warning. My inner strength had just decided to make itself known. "Maybe I want to be seen through." Edward looked caught off guard, finally. Then the cold face returned yet again.

"So why are you still covered up?" He took a step closer to me, closing in the already nonexistent space between us. I felt a shock of electricity run through even from the touch of the strands of our clothing. I instinctively took a step back looking everywhere else but the pool of emerald green beckoning me to come out.

I took a deep breath and gulped, letting out a shaky exhale. "Because you wouldn't want to see what's really underneath. I'm… I'm doing you a favor." A favor? I'm doing the guy a favor? Like he hasn't witnessed enough to realize you're a mentally insecure, anxiety-ridden girl in need of his father's help.

Without taking his eyes off me, he reached behind him and pulled out a shirt from a drawer. He placed it on my chest and I reached for it. A blue cotton shirt.

"You're not doing anyone a favor. But if you're going to cover up for the sake of someone else, try a less transparent disguise. A white see-through shirt?" he scoffed, "You're not fooling anyone, especially shrieking on top of your lungs right across the room."

"Who the hell do you think you are?!" I snapped. I couldn't retain the anger he triggered inside me. Once again, any control I had over my emotions was long forgotten.

"Someone who's offering you a shirt to cover yourself up again. I don't know if it's for your sake or my sake," the last few words were barely audible. He took yet another step towards me, this time I didn't bother to move. I wanted to prove something. Like I wasn't afraid to back down, that I didn't feel like I had to cover myself up for my sake or for his sake.

"Bellaaaaaaa! Oh my gosh why didn't you come to me if you needed a shirt? Are you still in the room?" A light and whimsical voice chimed in from the other side of the door. Our bodies froze in place, heads turned in the direction of where the voice was coming from.

Still clutching onto his shirt, I reluctantly pushed it back in his hands and let go. "I guess I won't be needing this." Without another glance, I reached for the door knob, pausing briefly to ponder looking back at his face once again, to say something more… but I stopped myself. I walked out of his room and shut the door behind me.

"Oh there you are! But… why were you in Edward's room…?" Alice's tone was full of curiosity.

"Um, he offered me a shirt because I couldn't find you but it didn't fit so…" Right, it didn't fit… I could only assume it wouldn't have fit.

"Well I have plenty of shirts you can choose from! Though… your shirt seems fine… Dad said it was wet or something. It seems completely dry, can't see through a thing. Oh well, you probably want something more comfy anyway. Come on!"

It seems completely dry, can't see through a thing… Her words echoed through my mind and I took a look at my now opaque shirt. Why was it that he caught me in a see-through moment and to everyone else… I was like a brick wall? Super senses… that's it. He has some sort of… out of realm power… it's not just me he does this to. It can't be.

Bella Swan get your fucking head straight. Before I could even gather a plan as to how exactly I was supposed to do just that, Alice pulled me along with her to her bedroom. "Oh oh! You wouldn't be opposed to a little touch up here and there. Just for fun. Oh pleaaaaaase!"

How old was she again? "Um… I really don't think it's necessa-" I couldn't even finish my sentence before she started pouting right in my face. I couldn't help but let out a huff of laughter, "I guess it wouldn't hurt. It won't hurt right?" I was being serious.

"Well I suppose you don't need your eyebrows plucked or anything. So no." she smiled.

Before we walked all the way into her room, the man who stood next to Alice earlier stepped out of the room. "Jasper I'll be a while. I mean, just a short little while," Alice winked and gave him a peck on the cheek earning a graceful laugh from him.

He gave me a sympathetic nod but not for the reasons I would usually think, "I'm sorry, Alice might get carried away with 'just letting you borrow one of her shirts' I'm sure someone in this family will go and retrieve you if you're not out in half an hour."

I couldn't even get in a word before Alice pulled me in excitedly. But it wasn't fast enough to stop me from catching a glimpse of the bronze-haired beauty… or beast that saw through me… step out of his room looking disheveled. We locked our eyes on each other for as long as a blink of an eye. Then I slipped away, now looking for something less transparent to cover up with. I internally laughed and scolded myself for taking his advice.

"You're not doing anyone a favor. But if you're going to cover up for the sake of someone else, try a less transparent disguise."

"So what do you think about this shirt?" Alice held up a shirt directly in front of my eyes, all thoughts of him blinded by another blue shirt. But with a snow angel. "I never actually wore this shirt, but Edward got it for me a while ago. I had this obsession with angels a while back. It's a beautiful shirt, it's a shame it hasn't been worn. Edward told me something about how snow angels are beautiful when the person who makes them is still lying there, but once they step out, it ruins the perfect shape, and then it's not an angelic beauty anymore. Just an empty mold. Well that just about turned my obsession with angels. Anyway it's a really soft shirt, and pretty. I think it would look great on you, with your skin tone and everything. Come on go try it on," Without another word she placed the shirt in my hands and pushed me into her gigantic closet.

So that's what a snow angel meant to Edward Cullen… Snow angels were all I had left in my memory of the good times I had with Renee. Until she left… until she was gone. The first snow fall every year she'd take me outside disregarding Charlie's warning about catching a cold. And we did every time, but that didn't stop us. We'd plop into the snow and flap our arms and legs to see who could make a bigger snow angel. Our giggles never stopped and I secretly prayed that I could turn into a snow angel and bring happiness to my mother every day. All those nights that I snuck out of bed and found her leaning against the sink in the bathroom, convulsing with tears and indecipherable utterances trembling from her lips while Charlie hovered over her, trying to get her still and handing her what seemed like a cocktail of pills. That night was the start of my double life: a life full of things I could know and a life full of things I had to pretend I didn't know. I always had the possibilities of the unknown constantly looming over me. I didn't want know that there was always another side, a darker side. But somehow, I always found myself walking in at the wrong times, listening in at the wrong times… speaking out at the wrong times. Always too soon or too late.

Please, don't take this away from me too. Just pretend. Pretend that the snow angel lying in the snow… is flawless. So that the only good memories I have of her can remain untainted… just please… Edward.

Thanks guys! Let me know what you think. Please get me through my midterm week -_- Also check out my other story "The Story" (haha) it's more playful, I think lol.

Love,

~B~