I'm not sure if you guys actually liked the CH2 since I didn't get ANY reviews. The number of follows spiked up though! Thanks to those who follow my story!

Here's CH3, I hope it gets more feedback though…

WARNING: sorry, but this chapter might get a bit too angsty for some of you.

DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN GLEE

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The Nowhere Man

"Ah! Finn, come in, come in! You know the drill." Dr. Sterling motioned for Finn to sit on the reclining chair designated for his patients. "How was your week?" Finn groaned. "Should we not talk about your week? Would you rather talk about what we talked about on your previous session?" Finn's foot tapped loudly against the rug-covered hardwood floor, his mouth opened and closed as if he was on the verge of saying something, but then stopping himself before anything came out. "We could talk about anything…" Dr. Sterling extended the sentence, as if waiting for Finn to say something. He knew that something bothered Finn, but he didn't want to be the pushy kind of doctor. He wanted to make sure that his patients opened up because they chose to, not because he nagged them with questions. "Or we can just sit here and—"

"It was so embarrassing!" Finn finally exclaimed, both his hands pressed against his cheeks, slowly sliding down and making his face look melted.

"What was?"

"I know that last week you said that you wanted to talk about what we talked about in the session. It's just that this past week…" Finn thought hard about how he wanted to tell his story without missing any details, and trying to make sense. At least more sense than he did during the last session. So he just resorted to shake his head while staring at his shoes.

"Yes? What happened, Finn?" Dr. Sterling stood up from his chair, and got a bottle of water from a miniature fridge hidden behind his large framed PhD diploma. He walked back towards Finn and set the bottle in front of his patient, on the table separating the chairs.

"Ok, I'll try to say this quickly so keep your ears open." The doctor nodded. "So basically my family's been smothering me with love," The doctor looked confused. "No, I mean… Well, you know when someone you care about is sick and all you want to do is take care of them and then you just do it all the time until they get better?" The doctor shrugged. "Well my parents did that. 24/7. Non-stop. Ever since my first session with you, it's like I've been on a leash, with a camera attached to my collar, with constant and never-ending supervision. My mom even turned my best friend into my babysitter."

"Let me guess," The doctor smirked. "You lost your cool and started yelling at everyone?"

"Psh, I wish!" Finn laughed. "I really wish I just did that. But instead, I sort of, maybe just a little bit, only for a couple of hours… I kind of disappeared for a while."

"You disappeared?"

"Well, okay. I found this really cool diner when I was supposed to be with Puck. I ate a snack, lost track of time, and got home late without anyone knowing where I was for a couple of hours." The doctor nodded in understanding. "But anyway, that's the backstory. So basically, my parents started freaking out and called my brother Kurt to ask if he knew where I was. And since everyone was freaking out they even asked Rachel if she knew where I was. Which, by the way, is so stupid! Why and how the hell would Rachel even know where I was?" Finn reached for the bottle that Dr. Sterling gave him, and took a big gulp of water.

"Ok, then what happened?"

"Well it was so embarrassing! That's what happened! I was so embarrassed, I couldn't even sleep for two days!" Finn stopped himself from rambling even more when he noticed Dr. Sterling writing something on a notepad. "Hey, I really hope you're not writing me a prescription for insomnia. When I say that I couldn't sleep, it's just that I was a bit stressed out… because I was embarrassed… so I'm not an insomniac. Just…y'know… Just saying."

"Don't worry, Finn, no prescriptions. If it was, I'd tell you." Finn sighed in relief. "So, tell me, why was it so embarrassing?"

"It's just that Rachel doesn't know that I'm seeing… You."

"Why is that?"

"Well we just don't talk anymore. And she's a student at some really awesome theatre school in New York, and here I am." Finn made an up-down motion with his arms to emphasize his words. "Here I am sitting in a really comfortable chair talking to some dude about how I can't control my emotions. I'm just some guy that she used to know, stuck in my hometown, talking to a shrink." His head fell down and Dr. Sterling was about to say something when Finn suddenly looked at him with wide eyes and eyebrows raised. "Oh my God! I'm worse than a Lima loser now… Shit, I'm a crazy Lima loser, who sees a shrink." At this point, Finn had his head between his knees with his hands covering the back of his head. "I don't have a real job, I don't go to school, my family treats me like a… a dog, I'm seeing a shrink. I'm definitely a crazy Lima loser. I'm nothing. I'm never going to go anywhere with my life. I have no future. Oh God…"

"As your doctor, I can tell you right now that you're not crazy. And trust me, I've seen many crazies out there. I've seen trainwreck crazy, and you're not even close to having basic 'crazy' traits." Finn lifted his head looked his doctor straight in the eyes. "You're far from crazy, Finn, and I really hope you trust me on that." When Finn nodded, Dr. Sterling decided to continue asking Finn for details. "Other than what you've just said. What is the real reason that it's really bad for Rachel to know you're seeing a therapist?"

"Like I said, we haven't talked in a while. The last time we did was when she had her showcase and she told me she won it." Finn's lips suddenly curled upward, it was one of those rare times that Dr. Sterling actually saw genuine happiness cross his face. "I'm so proud of her you know," but the smiles never lasted longer than three seconds. "I think I'm always going to be proud of her, and I'll always be happy for her success. But I feel like I'd be happier for her if I was happy with her."

"What do you mean? Do you mean that you'd be happier if you were sharing her news with her?"

"Well, of course I'd be happier if I was with her, but I meant that… I mean that I'd be happier sharing her good news, if I was also happy myself. Does that make sense? Does that make me sound selfish?"

"No, not at all. You're allowed to feel the way you feel."

"Sometimes I feel like she throws all her success at my face while I have nothing going for me. And the worst part?" Finn let out a harsh exhale through his nostrils. "The worst part is that every time something good happens to her, and every time she shares it; she knows that I'm not having the best of days, but she rubs her success in my face anyway."

"Do you not like that she's successful?"

"No! That's not what I meant! Wait… is that what I implied?!" Finn was now off the chair and paced around the room. "If that's what it sounded like, then I… I take it back, because… Argh! God! Why is this so hard?" He leaned against the wall where the doctor's diploma hung. "I'm happy for her; I love that she's successful in what she does but…I…Is it so bad that I want to have some success in my life too? Can't I be happy too?"

"Is that the reason why you didn't want Rachel to know about seeing a therapist?"

"It's part of it, yes." Finn ran a hand through his short hair, and hesitantly sat back on the chair. "I just don't want to be that downer in her life. And that's mostly why I made her go to New York in May without me. I don't ever want to be the one pulling her back from doing great things."

"So telling Rachel about your therapy would pull her back from her success? Is that what you're saying?" Dr. Sterling made more notes on his pad, and looked at Finn confused.

"Rachel is the type of person who…Um… Well when she cares about someone, and I mean, really really care, she won't stop. And if she finds out that something's wrong with that person, she's just going to worry until everything is fine again. Kind of like what my mom is doing to me now."

"So then Rachel cares about you a lot?"

"I know we're not together anymore but I know her. I don't want to sound vain or anything, but I know she still cares about me. Just like I still care about her, and I know she knows that. We're tethered to each other." Finn looked out the window and gave the sky a crooked smile. "But I didn't want her to know mostly because…" Finn looked back at the doctor. "She always has happy news and when she broke the no contact rule, it's because she had happy news she wanted to share with me." He wiped his hands on his jeans, realizing how clammy they were getting. "I just wanted to do it too. You know, I wanted the time when I broke my no contact rule to be because I had good news to share with her. I didn't want it to be about how I'm going crazy and I'm seeing a shrink."

"That's understandable. Have you told Rachel any of this before?"

Finn shyly shook his head and said, "I just really don't want to disappoint her."

Dr. Sterling didn't respond to let Finn have some time to dwell on the things he had shared. A few moments later, he checked his wristwatch for the time, and realized that they only had a little less than ten minutes left for the session so he said, "Since we're almost out of time, I've got some homework for you until I see you for our next session."

Finn groaned, but his face quickly lit up when Dr. Sterling gave him a folded sheet of paper. It looked like a piece from the notepad he was writing notes on during the whole session. He took the paper and quickly read the note which said, "Needs to communicate with others more." He looked up at his doctor and said, "What does this mean?"

"Ok, first of all, you're not forced to do it. Second, I just want you to try it out. From everything you've said today, it just seems like you're a bit closed off from the people around you. Your parents, your friends, Rachel." Finn folded the paper back and put it in his jacket pocket. "You can start with telling small things like, I don't know maybe tell your family how your day went? Or maybe you can even go ahead and tell Rachel the things you told me today. It's your choice, really. You can choose to completely ignore the assignment, or you can choose to try it just to try something different, and maybe just see how it goes?" Finn undecidedly nodded his head, not quite sure what to think yet.

"I'll think about it."

It had already been three days since his last session with Dr. Sterling, but Finn couldn't stop thinking about his given task for the week. He initially wanted to just ignore the assignment but it didn't help that every time he shoved his hands in his jacket, he felt the piece of paper, reminding him to try something different.

Finn had tried to "communicate", as the piece of paper informed him, twice during the days following the session. The first time was with Kurt. They were having one of their weekly brother-catch-up phone calls. It started off with their regular chitchat about their parents, how their jobs were going, and about Kurt's acceptance into NYADA. It was great until Kurt said, "So why are you ignoring Rachel?" From then on the phone conversation had become awkward, what with Finn refusing to say no more than single-word answers, and Kurt giving one of his "I'm not butting in your business, but I am" speeches. Kurt told Finn about how Rachel tried to talk to him on Facebook right when Finn replied to Kurt about disappearing. She told her roommate about how Finn didn't reply, but stayed online for a few more minutes before logging out. Finn thought about opening up to his brother, but felt like it should have been Rachel that he should talk to. So the conversation was just uncomfortable, at least back in Lima it was.

The second time was with his mother. It wasn't as awkward as the conversation with Kurt, but it wasn't pleasant either. There was a day when Finn finally found some quiet alone time at home to lie down on his bed, or play some beats on his drums. Except his calm bubble kept getting poked at with continuous on-coming text messages coming from his mother, who wanted to check up on him. So he decided that when his mother got home from work that day, they would have a nice and peaceful talk about giving him some space. But it hadn't worked out the way he planned it. The night had ended with a screaming match, an exhausted Burt, a crying mother, and a fuming Finn.

So far, the assignment Dr. Sterling had given him wasn't turning out so well. Maybe it was best for everyone if he didn't try changing at all.

Two days before Finn's next session things still had not improved. Trying to communicate with his family always ended badly. Maybe something really is wrong with me. Maybe I really am just Finn, the Loony Lima Loser, he thought.

Finn had stopped trying to "communicate" since he hated how much conflict it always caused around his family. He wasn't quite sure how to talk to anyone without sparking up his temper anymore. What had changed him? Not even two years ago, before he graduated from high school, he had some of the strongest relationships with people. He was close with his mother, as well as with Burt and Kurt, he had great relationships with his friends, and even with his girlfriend. What was it that made him become so somber? What happened to make him feel so distanced from everybody else? For some reason everyone just got on his nerves, and there were even times when he got on his own nerves, so he'd just sleep away the day. He didn't really know what was happening anymore.

Two days before his next session, Finn decided to spend the afternoon lying on the snowy grass in the backyard of the house after work. Sure, it was the middle of winter. Sure, it was freezing cold, but he just felt like lying down, and to make his body feel numb against cold, wet snow. He was listening to a Glee playlist he had compiled when he was still helping the new kids while Mr. Schue was in D.C. for the Blue Ribbon panel.

He was about to fall asleep to a Grease song when the music stopped and his ringtone played in his earphones instead. He sat up from the grass and fished for his phone in his jacket pocket, and got irritated when he felt the annoying piece of paper inside. When he finally got his phone out, he was surprised to see that the caller was Rachel.

Finn wanted to answer the call. It had been a while since he last heard her voice, but at the same time he didn't want to talk to her. The problem, or part of it was, that he didn't know what to say, in fact, he didn't even know why she was calling. Maybe a simple "Hi"; no that's too casual, he thought. Maybe I should say sorry, he thought again, but that sets a really crappy mood to a conversation… Finn's hands started to sweat despite the cold weather. His fingers trembled as he brought it up to the phone to answer the call and settled by saying, "Hello?"

"Finn? You answered!" God, I missed that! "I didn't thinking you would… I thought I was going to have another conversation with your voicemail." Finn's body suddenly warmed up as he heard her giggle into the phone.

"Oh. Heh." What do I say? "Uh…So, what's up?" Finn lay back down on the grass, completely ignoring the fact that he now had wet butt stains on his jeans.

"I… You've…" Finn shifted uncomfortably at Rachel's uncharacteristic stutter. "I just wanted to tell you that it's my dad's birthday next weekend so I'll be coming back home for a couple of days." Then he stiffened, he wanted to say something but he couldn't. Was this supposed to be good news? "So, you know, I just wanted to tell you beforehand. Just so that if you spot me during the weekend, you won't be surprised or anything…"

"It's your town too, Rachel. I mean, I know you said that Lima doesn't feel like home anymore," Even with the distance he could feel her wince at the memory, remembering the exact moment when she told him that. "But it's where you grew up and your dads are here. So you don't have to ask me for permission to come home."

"Oh, I'm not… I wasn't asking for your permission." Finn's fingers clenched around the phone, he really didn't want to pick a fight right now. "I just wanted to warn you. You know… Since you have your… things—" Rachel continued to talk but it had become partially inaudible since Finn brought the phone away from his ear. He'd had enough of people skirting around his situation. Why couldn't they just say it? Why couldn't people just say that he was seeing a therapist? Oh, right, 'cause every time someone does, I yell at them. "Finn? Are you still there?"

"Um yeah, still here." He whispered, trying to keep calm.

"So are you ok to meet up and talk? I really want to talk to you Finn." Her voice was so soft and sweet, Finn didn't know if he could refuse. But he thought back to his little trip to New York, how he saw Brody and how Rachel confessed the kiss. He thought back to her coming back to Lima just to break up with him. He thought back to that talk after Grease, and the no contact rule. The more he thought about those things the less he wanted to meet up with Rachel and talk to her.

But his left hand was still in his pocket, unconsciously playing with the paper inside which reminded him that he, "Needs to communicate with others more." By this point he had memorized the note on the paper, not that it was hard to in the first place. Finn thought that maybe he should talk to her. Would it really be so bad?

He didn't know how to respond without sounding mean, so he said, "I… Can I let you know in a couple of days? I need to think about it first. I mean… Is that ok with you?"

"Great! Yes, just let me know. I get there Friday night. So we could get together sometime on Saturday?" She sounded different, Finn just noticed. Maybe it was all that success she was getting in New York; maybe more people were starting to see just how great she was; and she was finally getting the recognition she deserved. Finn didn't know what it was exactly, but she sounded different, and it was a happy kind of different.

"Yeah. Sure. Ok. I'll let you know. Bye." He already had his phone away from his ear, and his finger close to the "End Call" button when Rachel was still saying her goodbyes.

Finn shoved his phone back in his pocket, and took the piece of paper out instead. He read the note once more, and thought, if this communication thing with Rachel fails just like it did with mom, Burt and Kurt, then what would it mean? If talking to his family didn't work, then hopefully a Rachel talk would end better. Hopefully it would make things better, or at least better than their previous encounters.

He thought back to his session with Dr. Sterling. The truth was that he hated not being able to tell people how he felt without arguing with them anymore. He just wanted to be able to talk to someone, and finally get past all this darkness. But so far he was just stuck.

So far, he was just a nowhere man.

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So that's it! I really hope this chapter gets more feedback than CH2.

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