AN: Sorry I haven't updated since forever! Lot of things going on, won't happen again :) enjoy! Please do review and leave ideas for the story.
Katniss
I head with Peeta to the train station, after he comes to my house and makes me breakfast. I can't cook. We meet Haymitch, Effie and the prep team there and we all board the train. We go to the diner for lunch and review the activities for when we get to the Capitol.
"We will arrive there at 5 O'clock. We will head directly to President Paylor's mansion, which is where you three will be staying", Effie explains. This mansion is what used to be President Snow's, which is the last place I want to stay, and Haymitch knows that because after he sees my face, he objects.
"We are not staying there. We will stay in the centre's Hotel", I'm so glad he did that. I'm sure no one of us wants anything to do with that place. The time we spent there was a nightmare.
"President Paylor wants you as guests. After all, you are the most important characters in the revolution movement", says Effie. I turn to look at Peeta who is looking at Effie intensively, asking for him to fix it.
"Effie you know this wouldn't be good for any of us. Tell commander Paylor it will have to be another time". This somehow reminded me of Gale, his voice sounded empowering. He wouldn't want to be there either, we have suffered so much because of Snow.
"I'll make the arrangements", she couldn't argue with the three of us. "So, next we'll be arriving at the justice building, where the ceremony will be held and televised. There you will change". We go through a few more details about the ceremony and then me and Peeta go to my compartment to take a nap. I first said no, bacause I don't want him to believe that somehow I want him back. I obviously do, but I can't do that to him, I'll somehow end up hurting him. But his sad eyes i can't bare, so I say yes and his face lights up. As always. It's becoming a tradition now, both of us sleeping in this train. I don't like it, I would much rather stay in twelve and never come back to the Capitol.
I get into bed as he does. He's about to pull me in his arms as he always does when I turn away. He sighs loudly. I feel terrible, but I will just end up hurting him more the next time I go back into depression and push him away. I don't deserve him and he needs to see that. He needs to be with someone that can make him hap-
"You are never going to change your mind about me, are you?" he says with pure sadness in his voice. "I mean, you are never going to see me as anything more", he paused as if the words where like knives stabbing their way out, "..than what I am to you now?" but i just couldn't answer so I kept on giving my back to him and pretended to be asleep, even though I know he knew I wasn't. He gave up after a while and fell asleep as I cried in silence asking for forgiveness. Something I could never deserve.
About an hour later, Effie knocks to wake us up.
"We arrived people! Grab your bags!" her enthusiasm annoys me, I have a terrible headache. But I obey, we grab our bags and head outside. It's warm, spring has begun, and it has this weird feeling to it, like the Capitol transitioned from this horrible slaughter place, to actually a glorious place. A place of freedom and justice. Maybe it's not going to be so bad after all.
We get into the black cars and make our way to the center of the Capitol. We go to the centre's Hotel and check in. As we go out of the cars, many persons recognize us and a giant crowd starts to head our way. I guess people here haven't got used to us like the people in Twelve. Peeta starts smiling and waving, making the perfect appearing as always. While I, like a little girl hide behind him blushing and barely waving. Makes me laugh, that I can take a war with no fear, but I can't take being famous for 5 minutes. We go inside and check in. Me and Peeta have separate rooms, but I know we'll both probably be staying in the same one. Even when it is the mont selfish thing to ask, I hate to be left alone at night when I have nightmares and Peeta has his tracker jacker venom attacks. We are the only ones able to help each other. We get to our rooms and our prep team arrives. First they do Peeta's final touches in his room and then they come to mine to do my final touches. Flavius hands me a hanger with a dress inside and before I opened it to see the dress Flavius tells me; "He wanted me to give you this one personally. He wanted me to say that this is not the last dress he made for you, the final and most important one, is yet to come and I can't tell you for what occasion it is. But he told me you were to wear this one in the revolution ceremony".
Of course. He knew I would do it even when I thought I could not. He knew I would turn Panem around. But I can't stop guessing what is the last one for. The most important one.
What could be an event more important than the revolution?
Peeta
As she comes out of the room with a full-length body turquoise and golden dress which accents her curves perfectly, she has her hair down like waves coming down her shoulders, and she lets a beautiful smile as she sees me. She seems pleased to look at me and how Flavius dressed me. I couldn't think of anything more beautiful and stunning.
"Look at you, all handsome in a tux", she says sending shivers al throughout my body.
"You look beautiful Katniss", I say as I offer my arm and we walk together to the elevator. We go to the bottom floor and get in the car to go to the Justice Building. People walk down the streets, eat at local restaurants, wear ridiculously expensive clothing. Guess nothing has changed much around here. Except for the people, many of them were killed or are taken prisoners. I wonder what they have done to their children.
The car stops, there's traffic. I stare at this little kid who is playing in the sidewalk. He's black haired and has green eyes. He's playing with a toy cart and in his other hand he holds an ice cream, but then a very sudden movement makes his ice cream fall and he starts laughing and I laugh with him too because it reminds me of my brother. He never cried, he only laughed. I just wanted to get out of the car, take him in my arms and keep him. But I didn't. I saw her from the corner of my eye, looking at the boy, watching me laugh with him. And she will probably know what I'm thinking. I do want a family one day, but I have to prove to her -because I want to marry her- that things can be good again.
The car accelerates and we get to the Justice Building.
The ceremony begins. "One last time?" she whispers in my ear as I take her hand. I nod.
"Ladies and Gentlemen, Katniss Everdeen, Mockingjay!" announces president Paylor. "And the man, who saved District 13, millions of lives as well as our Mockingjay's, Peeta Mellark!" the crowd goes crazy as Katniss and I appear in the stage. I smile and laugh because this is the first time we are both actually happy of why we are on stage. And she smiles because she can also realize that. After all this time, she knows me and I know her, I think, better than anyone.
We take our seats on stage as president Paylor begins the his speech, but I only heard part of it, I was lost looking at Katniss, who to my surprise, was staring at Gale sitting across the stage. Jealousy slapped me in the face as she wouldn't look anywhere else but to Gale's face. He was in a tux similar to mine, but his was brown. I don't hate him, no. But I'm sure that if he weren't Katniss' best friend and if I weren't jealous of that, I still would not be friends with him. But I could never hate him, for all that he has done for Katniss and all the protection he has given to her when I didn't, I'll be eternally grateful for that.
Only the last words of Paylor's speech snap me off my thoughts:
"..and for those, who we will be eternally grateful", just what I was thinking, "those who gave their lives for the cause". Says paylor as the lights dim down, and gigants screens are turned on. The mockingjay symbol appears, and then it starts, one of the saddest things I have ever have to put through, the memorial of those who died during the revolution.
First it starts with Finnick, they showed a short tape of him laughing, tying nods and him and Annie kissing in their wedding, and I know Katniss started to cry before I realize I have started to tear up. I hold his hand tighter in the dark. Then she takes my cheek as Cinna's tapes start.
"Make it go away", she cries in silence. Then Boggs tape appears with all of the commander's tapes, then many of the tributes who passed away. But that wasn't the worst, because when we thought it was about to end, I lost grip of Katniss' hand to see she was looking for something in her dress with mad eyes. My eyes went to the screen. There she was with her pretty kid's face, braided blonde hair and grayish eyes. Prim.
"Where did you put the nightlock!" her voice was barely louder than a whisper but enough for Haymitch to hear. He stood up and came across the stage with his gray suit and look of sadness to whisper to her, "It wouldn't look good if you kill yourself on sage sweetheart", but he seemed to understand, "you both just pull through the ceremony. No one is expecting more". He walked back to his seat in the darkness while the last videos of my family where playing and I wanted to beg for them yo play them again so I could take a final look at my little brothers, my mother and father, as they vanish away forever. Only for the shinny memories of the peacekeeper version of Katniss whipping my brother to the death take place. And I look away from her. They are dead. No one can touch them. Katniss is no harm. Katniss is no harm. I lo- I love- I love her.
That was harder to take in, but I promised myself Snow would never again break me apart from her, or else he would win, and I in all that matters, would loose. Those dark days, would never come back. She wipes the tears of her face but her eyes cannot hide the sadness. Lights come up and the screen signs off with the mockingjay symbol.
Cheering from the crowd comes to me like voices telling me not to worry, and so I take her hand in mine. Paylor says a few words of goodbye, to all who died, but the ceremony must continue. I spot Annie and Johanna, who also have tears in their faces, as well as Effie and the prep team. Gale is still looking at the screen, as if waiting for someone else to appear. He didn't cry, he didn't have anyone to really be sad about, except Prim.
Me and Katniss walk to the Mockingjay flag we are supposed to present as the new symbol of the capitol. She clears her throat to speak, which is not the usual, normally I would speak.
"We all lost someone we loved", she looks to her hands, as if trying to get a grip because she's afraid she might fall. I grab her shoulder in comfort, "during the battle. We lost hope, and they gave it to us. We lost our way, and they led us back. So let's honor their death, lets make Panem remember them and what they did, because to them, we owe our freedom!" she finishes and a girl in the crowd starts to sing.
Deep in the meadow, Under the willow, A bed of grass, A soft green pillow, Lay down your head, And close your sleepy eyes, And when again they open, The sun will rise, Here it's safe, Here it's warm, Here the daisies guard you from every harm, Here your dreams are sweet and tomorrow brings them true, Here is the place where I love you.
And for one last time, they all start whistling Rue's song, not afraid of who might hear.
All because of the woman that risked her life to bring me medicine in my first games, the one who made a revolution and changed my life.