We left the Justice Hall and walked the half mile to the train tracks, my nicest dress being covered in soil along the way. I'd tried to walk in my heels in the beginning, but made it about twenty yards before my feet were aching and I had to stop to remove them. I didn't know where we were going, but I was already beginning to form a plan in my mind.
All of the soldiers who had been present at the selection ceremony surrounded Daniel and me, as though trying to protect us from anything that might want to hurt us. It seemed funny, seeing as they were protecting us only to send us to our deaths. Ironic.
I figured that, with about twenty-plus men surrounding me, there had to be at least one who would be willing to help a poor, defenseless child. Still, I knew that there was no way that they would help me escape Scot free, because then they would be held accountable. They would have to find another girl to take my place, and they wouldn't save one girl just to replace her with another simply out of pity.
I hardened my heart as I came to the realization that I had little to offer, only my body, which meant that my purity would have to be given to whatever soldier was willing to put another girl in my place. Only hours ago, I would've sworn that I would never want another girl in my place, that I would never trade my body for freedom, and that I'd hold to my morals no matter what. One life changing event and suddenly it all meant nothing compared to the hope of living.
At the tracks, a train hummed in expectation of departure. The front end looked like a passenger train, while the other half seemed to be four livestock cars. Veering to the left, we were led to the second livestock car. Unlike normal cars, the door for this was like the door to a house, with a deadbolt and four other locks keeping it shut. Taking out a key ring, Sergeant Delco unlocked the door one lock after another, then opened the door which, once opened, only showed darkness. Taking Daniel by the arm, Delco hoisted him up into the car, giving him a push to make sure that he was all the way in. Swiftly, he shut the door and then re-locked it. One of the film crews had been right by the door, filming every moment of Daniel's entrance.
Sergeant Delco then looked at me, leaning his head to the left to motion that I would be in the next car. Not wanting to give him the satisfaction of throwing me in, I moved through the soldiers so that I was leading the way alongside the Sergeant, forcing my camera crew to hurry if they wanted to get any glimpse of me. After he had unlocked the door, I lifted my arms, allowing him access to my waist. Once I'd been lifted onto the car, I grabbed the door to keep from being pushed in. I turned to look at the twenty or so soldiers who were watching me, waiting for me to back into the darkness. Scanning their faces, they looked impatient, if not slightly unnerved. Maybe they thought I would try to make a break for it. I remembered my father's words. I would have to make one of these fall for me to the point that he would betray the Capitol to have me.
But there were so many flaws to this plan. If the train never stopped and went all the way to the Capitol, there was no way I'd be able to trade places with a Capitol girl. One girl from the districts was like any other because we'd never had population documentation, but the Capitol was completely different. They had every person accounted for, or at least that's what I'd heard, which meant that, if I was to switch, it would have to be outside of the Capitol, if that was even an option. Another flaw would be the man himself. If I picked the wrong man, it was all over. If I picked the right man at the wrong time, it was still over. There were so many things that could go wrong with this plan; but it was the only plan I had, so I had to run with it.
My gaze then fixed on the camera held in the hands of one of the cameramen. I leaned against the door for a moment, then smiled at the lens. This seemed to only make the soldiers, and the camera crew, more nervous.
"Thank you for walking me to my car," I said, beginning to slowly shut the door, making the darkness behind me that much darker. "Enjoy your ride." With that, I shut the door completely. In all his efficiency, Sergeant Delco immediately locked the door. Turning, I saw that the car was dimly lit, with one window on each of the two longer sides, barred to keep me from escaping. There was an odor to the car that could only be described as rank. To my right, there was a bucket which I assumed was either for water or waste. In the corner across from me, there were two more buckets, and then, in the corner to my far left, was a pile of hay. A dark figure lay on the hay, causing me to gasp.
"Hello?" I questioned warily. The figure moved, getting off of the hay and stepping into the little light provided by the window. She was tiny, about a head shorter than me, with raven hair and blue eyes. She looked more frightened than anything, but I could tell that she hadn't had a bath in a few days and wasn't exactly well fed. She stood there, in the light, silently for what felt like forever. "It's alright. I won't hurt you." I could almost feel the tension running through her body begin to lessen at my voice, but I stayed where I was, not wanting to scare her.
"What's your name?"
"Cora." Her voice was high-pitched and, even though she'd hardly whispered her name, the sound fill the car. Suddenly, I felt the car begin to shake, causing me to lose my balance. Bracing myself against the wall to try to regain it, I realized that the train was pulling away. We were leaving District 11, the only place I had ever known. Rather than think about all that I was losing in these moments, I turned my attention to the little girl who was just as frightened, if not more so, as I was.
"How old are you, Cora?" I inquired, moving towards the pile of hay. I tossed aside the precaution I'd had before with the realization that this was all that was left of my life. Both of our lives.
She followed suit, moving back into the darkness and settling into the hay. Moments later, I sat down beside her.
"I'm twelve. From District 12." All I could think of was the word my mother had used. Barbaric. She was so young, maybe even young enough not to know womanhood yet, and they were going to make her fight to the death against 23 others, some of which might be my age or older. How fair would that be, to pit a twelve year-old against an eighteen year-old? It was more than unfair.
"How long have you been on the train?" I glanced around, once again, to take in our current home. The lone pale was definitely the bathroom. I'd gotten used to the foul odor, but that didn't mean that it was gone.
"A day, maybe two." My stomach dropped to hear this, filling my mind with questions. How could they treat a little girl this way? One would think that I'd finally be beyond surprise at the cruelty of the Capitol, but somehow, they always found a way to surpass themselves.
"Do they feed you? Have they let you out of the car?" Panic began to drill its way into my head. They were going to lock me in here to die, which seemed a worse fate than dying at someone's hands.
"They come through the door over there," she replied, pointing to a door much like the one I'd come through that was by the two pales, "twice a day. I was allowed to walk outside for a while when we stopped last time, before you got on, but other than that, no." My heartbeat slowed slightly, they didn't intend to starve us or keep us in here forever. Of course not, they had to offer us up to the Games.
"What district are you from?" she asked, picking up a piece of straw and folding it in halves until it couldn't be folded anymore.
"Eleven." I stood on my tip toes, grabbing onto the bottom of the window to try to pull myself up. Eventually, I was able to lift myself enough to catch a glimpse of what was outside. Orange trees, everywhere. We were definitely reaching the outskirts of my district.
"I've never been there," she stated, not really meaning anything by it.
"Well, you're in it now." We both were quiet for a moment, knowing that this the few moments she'd gotten off of the train didn't count. She was the first to break the silence.
"What was the uprising like in your district?" she inquired, her voice soft but her eyes inquisitive. For a moment, I allowed myself to think about all that had happened during that time. As a rule, I tended to avoid the topic. There was too much I'd seen and done over the course of it, too many people lost, for me to think about. But in this one moment, I allowed memories to stream like a river, flooding and powerful enough to drown me if I let them; but I didn't. I was stronger than my grief.
"Terrible," I replied, not wanting to say what I'd just relived out loud. "How about in 12?" She nodded.
"The same. The Capitol closed down the coal mines, so none of the men could work. We were all starving to death, but the men who led the uprising wouldn't give in." Her eyes seemed to glaze over at the memory. I pitied her, having my own memories of being starving. When the Capitol burned down our crops, my family would go days at a time without food. It was only through the goodwill of Claire's family, who'd been well off before the uprising, that we survived at all.
"Were you a part of the uprising?" She looked towards the window, to freedom, shaking her head.
"No, my papa didn't think it was right. We'd already lost my mamma when my brother was really little, and he didn't want to risk us losing him too." I couldn't fault Cora's father for not joining the uprising so that he could be a father to his children, but it seemed that even staying out of the uprising hadn't been able to keep his family safe.
My father hadn't thought that way, he thought that it was our duty to stand against the Capitol, to show them that we were not slaves to them. If he thought about what might happen to him, or any of us, he didn't say so. We all marched into war with no thought to anything but the "after." What would happen once the war was over. Even then, I had no idea what would happen "after" other than the Capitol would stop burning our fields.
"They were putting up fences by the woods in my district," Cora began, breaking me from the thoughts of my father. "They say it's to keep us safe. That the radiation from 13 will kill you if you enter the woods."
"I'd be surprised if they did anything to keep us safe," I scoffed, leaning further into the hay. "Lately, they've definitely been screwing us over."
"That's true," she admitted, "but still, I wouldn't want to take my chances."
"I'd say I'd have a better chance in the woods than where they're sending us," I joked, sarcasm strong in my voice. "But we are where we are."
"Yes," she agreed, closing her eyes and relaxing into the hay. "We are where we are." Moments later, I could hear her steady breathing, her mind hopefully far from where we were. She was a cute kid but, I knew, though I hated it, that I couldn't save her. I could hardly think of a way to save myself. Even my plan had a 99% chance of failing. I looked at her, young and inexperienced, and knew that she would be one of the first to die. I also knew that I couldn't be, wouldn't be, the one to kill her. Knowing that there was nothing else to do, I allowed the tension that had filled in my chest since the beginning of the day to dissipate as I closed my eyes and let sleep take me.
