Disclaimer: OTH and its characters do not belong to me. Neither do the songs quoted in this chapter. They are 'Gone Away From Me' and 'Be Here Now' both by Ray Lamontagne.

Please take the time to let me know what you think. This story will contain multiple flashbacks which will be in italics! Xx

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This Wasn't Supposed to Happen

Chapter Three – Gone Away From Me

Lucas, Peyton, Dan, Deb and Haley, Tyler's car seat in her left hand, stood in the waiting area of Tree Hill Hospital.

"What happened?" Brooke came running in, hair soaking wet and still in her pyjama top. "Hales, what happened? Where is he? He's ok; yes he's ok isn't he?"

Haley looked at Brooke but couldn't reply.

Deb intervened, her own voice choked with tears and fear. "Nathan was hit by a car. That's all we know."

Brooke stared at Deb. "But he's ok?"

Tears began to fall slowly down Deb's cheeks, as she shrugged her shoulders. "We don't know yet."

Brooke's face fell, before rising into a false smile. "Well of course he is, this is Nate we're talking about. He's all about the drama, but he'll be fine!"

Brooke' words echoed amongst the group, as she looked round each of their faces. Fear and pain was all she saw. No hope.

"Excuse me, Haley?" A doctor had approached their group.

"Yes?" Haley spoke for the first time since arriving, her state of shock consuming her entirely.

"May I have a word?" The doctor led Haley and Tyler into a small room and closed the door.

"Mrs Scott" he began, as Haley shook her head.

"We're not married." She responded.

"I apologise" the doctor continued. "Haley, Nathan was hit by a car at around ten thirty this morning, and he's in a bad way. He has sustained several serious injures. We're doing all we can, but unfortunately at this moment, we can't be sure of anything."

Haley's forehead creased with confusion, "Can't be sure?" she repeated. "You mean I might lose him?"

The doctor took a deep breath; there was nothing harder than this. "We're doing everything we can."

Haley looked at her son and back at the doctor, her eyes and voice both full of tears. "But we don't work without him?"

"I promise you Haley, we'll do everything we can."

Haley brushed the tears from her face. "Can I see him?"

"Yes. Yes of course."

Haley sat motionless in her chair, watching the rise and fall of Nathan's chest, aided by the machines he lay connected to. Now unable to cry, unable to move, she couldn't make any sense of the situation she was faced with.

For a while I sat there staring at her photograph
For a while I cried and tried not to make a scene
There was a time when we were young
I used to make her laugh
But life is long, my love has gone away from me

Haley turned to the door when she heard it open, a nurse with a tray of food entering the room.

"Hey, Mrs. Scott, I brought you some food, I thought you might be hungry"

Haley turned back to Nathan, her eyes over every inch of him. She spoke, her words cold and harsh. "Firstly we're not married, and secondly, no. I'm not hungry."

The nurse sat the tray down on the table behind Haley, taking a seat next to her patient and his partner.

Gone away from me
Gone away from me
Life is long, my love has gone away from me
Gone away from me
Gone away from me
Life is long, my love has gone away from me

"Sweetheart" the nurse began again. "You should sleep. Go home, change your clothes. There's unlikely to be any change tonight."

Haley turned her eyes to the nurse who sat beside her, looking her up and down. "Get out." She spat. "You don't know what you're talking about."

Lately I can't seem to find myself no sleep at all
Lately I just lie awake and hear and dream
Of the time when she was mine
Felt like I had it all
But life is long, my love has gone away from me

Gone away from me
Gone away from me
Life is long, my love has gone away from me
Gone away from me
Gone away from me
Life is long, my love has gone away from me

"Haley!" Nathan entered the apartment, throwing his keys down on the table and picking the mail off the floor. "Hales, baby? You up?" Nathan walked down the hallway of their home, as he traced his eyes over the letters they had received. "Bill, phone bill, letter for Haley, oh Hales?" he called out. "There's a letter for" his voice stopped dead, his hands dropping the letters to the floor. "Oh God."

Haley sat kneeled on their bedroom floor, her face red and her eyes bloodshot, a hand tightly clutching her eight month old baby belly. "Nathan" she groaned, obviously in pain. "I'm having your son." Haley screamed as another contraction hurt her body. "And I'm not kidding this time."

Yesterday is gone
Yesterday is dead
Get it through your head and walk away
Yesterday is gone
Ain't no use hanging on to her memory
It only causes you pain

Haley leant forward to Nathan's bed, fighting her pain, she spoke softly. "Do you remember baby? Do you remember when we had Ty?" She choked as she felt she might cry. But no tears came.

Smoothing her fingers over a cut on his face, Haley continued. "I hated you that day, hated you for getting me pregnant in the first place." Haley tried to laugh. "But you were so great, it was perfect." Haley looked at Nathan, closing her eyes she saw Tyler too.

"I'm a bad mother Nathan. I can't look at Tyler right now, it just" Haley stopped, her own reality tearing her apart. "It just hurts."

Slowly, a single tear began to appear in Haley's eye, trickling its way down her face.

For a while I sat there staring at her photograph
For a while I cried and tried not to make a scene
There was a time when we were young
I used to make her laugh
But life is long, my love has gone away from me

Gone away from me
Gone away from me
Life is long, my love has gone away from me
Gone away from me
Gone away from me
Life is long, my love has gone away from me

"What am I going to do?" Haley spoke, not loudly, not softly, but full of pain, lonely pain.

-

"Hales?" a familiar voice woke Haley from her thoughts.

"Me again" Brooke spoke.

"What time is it?" Haley asked.

"It's about eleven" Brooke replied. "How are you feeling?" Brooke didn't know the words to use.

Haley ignored Brooke's question, not in anger, but with a lack of response. She didn't know what she felt.

"Where's…" Haley stopped, unable to finish her sentence.

Brooke knew what she was thinking, what she needed to know.

"Tyler's with Luke. He misses you."

Haley turned as far from Brooke as she could, unable to deal with her words, unable to cope with her own guilt.

"He's ok though" Brooke continued. "But he won't sleep."

Haley's tears fell faster.

"I've tried everything, rocking him, playing music, singing to him" Brooke knew Haley's pain, "Any hints or tips, tutor-mom?"

Something inside Haley snapped. Whether it was the talk of her baby son, or the use of the nickname she adored, Haley's emotions surfaced.

"Brooke" she yelled, her voice raised so loudly. "I can't help Tyler right now. I can't help myself right now" she was screaming. "Can't you just hold him? Can't you just be the godmother you're supposed to be?" Haley was shaking, as she rose to her feet to meet Brooke's eyes.

"Haley…" Brooke began. "Hales I just need to help him sleep…" Brooke's voice began to break. "And I…I need your help to do that"

Haley began to tug at her own hair, running her hands through it, her tears becoming hysterical.

"I can't do that…" Haley's tears intensified.

"Haley please "Brooke pushed further. "What can I do?"

Haley stared hard at Brooke, before beginning to hit her, softly thumping her arms, her chest. "You can't do anything" she screamed, continuing in her rage of violence.

Brooke grabbed Haley's wrists, stopping her from hitting her, but allowing her to continue in her movements of punching. "Hales"

"You can't help" Haley screamed, "I can't help" The fear in Haley's eyes scared Brooke. "He needs Nate. He needs Nate" Haley collapsed into Brooke's arms. "He needs Nate. He needs Nate' Haley continued, sobbing into her friend's shoulder. Brooke held her tightly. "He needs Nate."

Brooke and Haley stood for several minutes, comforting each other, searching for answers to the questions which just didn't make sense.

Haley pulled apart. "You should go" she spoke calmly.

"How about I stay here for a little while?" Brooke responded, knowing Haley needed her.

Don't let your mind get weary and confused

Your will be still, don't try

Don't let your heart get heavy child

Inside you there's a strength that lies

"No" Haley rubbed her face, ashamed of her outburst. "It's ok, I'm fine"

Don't let your soul get lonely child

It's only time, it will go by

Don't look for love in faces, places

It's in you, that's where you'll find kindness

"Well how about I just sit here, against the door. You won't even know I'm here"

Haley shrugged. "Ok, Brooke. But I'm fine."

Be here now, here now

Be here now, here now

Haley and Brooke sat in silence, staring into space, but needing each other in the darkness they felt.

Don't lose your faith in me

And I will try not to lose faith in you

Don't put your trust in walls

'Cause walls will only crush you when they fall

An hour passed, and then another. It was a new day, but the two girls were faced with the same reality. Brooke didn't move, sitting knowing she was doing all she could for her friend right now.

Another hour passed, neither girl could sleep, silence, pain and fear has enveloped them.

Turning, Haley looked to Brooke and closed her eyes. Nodding and hoping her friend knew what was in her heart. Brooke smiled.

"Hales" Brooke spoke, gathering Haley's attention. "You're welcome" she mouthed.

Be here now, here now

Be here now, here now