Dear France,

Please stop streaking through my yard. My horses are getting scared and I'm tired of having to cover Illinois's eyes.

Sincerely,

Lee Jones, Indiana

Ah, you must listen! It is not my fault! England had America chase me! I hope you understand! And why cover Illinois? You should be proud! The sooner the young learn, the better. If you wish for me to stop, please talk to America. It is becoming quite tiresome to deal with.

With unbending love,

Francis Bonnefoy