1Disclaimer: All characters and related works are property of Stephenie Meyer.
Chapter 3
E.P.O.V.
45 minutes had never seen so long in all of my existence. Bella and I were just friends, I had to realize that, needed to realize that. Yet now, with her in such proximity to me, the only thing that I seemed to be realizing is that she truly did look amazing in blue. What was wrong with me? Since when did I think of Bella as anything more than my adopted sister? It was detrimental to my sanity to keep my newly acknowledged feelings under wraps until I could rid myself of them completely. I needed to be thinking about giving Bella her present, and keeping her thoughts happy. Her birthdays were tough on her sometimes now that her parents were gone. She was fine now, and we were all determined to keep her that way. I needed to be thinking about a way I could sneak off to pick up her present without her knowing, thought she probably knew by now. When we were 16 I got her a silver charm bracelet and a charm shaped like a scripted 'b'. Every year on her birthday I got her another charm to add to it. She had to know what to expect by now, she's going on her ninth charm. Normally they were just thing that interested her, a book, a key (she was always forgetting her's), a cast for the year she broke her ankle etc. Just the normal things. For some reason this year I took a completely different approach, this year I had gotten her a small diamond in the shape of a heart. I still can't explain my reasoning, but when I saw it I knew she had to have it. I just had to think of a way to slip out of the diner to pick it up. Instead I was thinking about how the air in the car would slowly fill with the sent of strawberries and freesia, and the way her hair contrasted with the paleness of her skin. I was thinking about the way she flushed when I saw her as I headed to the bathroom this morning before her face exploded into various shades of pink and red as she blushed... No. I mentally scolded myself for where my thoughts had strayed. Bella was like a sister to me, I'd certainly never had these kinds of thoughts about Alice. Besides, I'd heard Jacob loud and clear this morning when he broke the news to Alice and I. After today Bella would be engaged, off limits. Not that she was in limits now, right? What was happening to me? I shook my head lightly as I waited for Bella to run back in the house and get her keys, which she had forgotten again
I looked over as I heard the door slam shut. Bella smiled and began to walk as quickly and carefully towards the car. She was wearing heels, which she never did unless it was either a special occasion or Alice was behind it. Bella was one of the clumsiest people I've ever known. She managed to make it successfully to the car and her pride at having done so was evident in her eyes as she opened the door. Unfortunately, she hadn't accounted for the shortness of the car and she gasped in both shock and pain as she hit her head off the roof of the car. We both froze as when she finally sat in the seat. I didn't know what to say, I'd just watched her face crumble from one of pride to shock. Bella just looked to me and broke out laughing, which prompted me to laugh and before long we were both tearing up.
"And- I-I- Thought I was doing so-so well!" she managed to say between laughs as she gathered her breath. When my laughs died down and I was coherent enough I reached my hand out and patted her on the shoulder. It was like lightening racing up my arm at the touch, swallowing my gasp of alarm I managed to tell her that it was fine, that she would learn to walk in them eventually. She just smiled at meas I turned the car on. We reached the highway in silence. It was never awkward with Bella, and it seemed now like we were both lost in our own thoughts. She looked pensive, her eyes gazing ahead at the road but not seeming to actually see anything. Her breathing was steady and even, the gentle rise and fall of her chest being her only movement.
I rubbed a hand through my hair as I sorted together my thoughts, arranging them in my mind. I knew that after tonight Bella would be fully committed to Jacob, beginning to prepare the wedding. Everyone would be happy for her, giving her the attention that noone but I knew she hated. She never was one for the spotlight, yet for the next few months she would be the center of attention. I briefly wondered how Rosalie would respond to that. She would be happy, along with everyone else. Jacob and her had been together since she turned 21, three years is a long time to be with someone, she seemed contented with him. I knew that he loved her, you could see it in his eyes every time he looked at her. It never seemed to bother me before, so why was it bothering me now. Thinking about them together was beginning to make my skin crawl. What had happened between yesterday and now that would make me react like this? Could it be that I was just overprotective and that I never really liked Jacob to begin with? I sighed, that had to be it, I was just being protective.
"Edward, are you okay?" Her soft voice lilted from beside me. I managed to muster up a smile as I turned to her.
"I'm fine, just thinking."
"Thinkin' about what?"
"It's nothing, I'm fine." I assured her. It was time to change the subject.
"So what do you want for your birthday?" I asked her as my eyes darted back to the road for a second before returning to her face.
"Well, for one, I would like to arrive in one piece! Edward, you're going 138 mph and you're not even looking at the road!" she gasped as she looked at the speedometer. She knew that I hated to drive slow, she was forever pestering me to slow down. I sighed as I lifted my foot off the gas and touched the tip of my shoe to the break. Bella still isn't too fond of cars, but then again, who can blame her.
"Better?" my voice sounded clipped even to my own ears.
"Yes," she responded simply. "I'm sorry, I know you hate driving slow but you seriously took a 45 minute car ride and pushed it to twenty. If the others hadn't left before us we probably would have passed them."
I was paying attention but her voice seemed to drop away as I heard her remark about our arrival time. I glanced at the clock to read that we were severely ahead of schedule, we had only been driving for fifteen minutes and we were already no less than ten minutes away. Normally that wouldn't have bothered me in the slightest but now for some reason it seemed like the minutes ticking by slowly was acting like a countdown, a catalyst that would signal an end of some sort. It was a completely unreasonable reaction to be having. Yet couldn't help but notice that my foot pressed the break down even further until it had dropped to a mere 60mph. I was even being passed out by a balding man in a rusted red Cadillac. None of it seemed to matter, nothing would matter but I just knew that I couldn't allow myself to let her go. I never even realized that I had opened my mouth before I heard the words tumbling out.
"Do you love him?" the words had rushed from my mouth before I even realized I had uttered them. Bella straightened in her seat but she didn't look away from the road, her voice didn't waver when she finally spoke to me.
" I care for him of course, we've been together for nearly three years, how could I not?"
. I glanced from the road to the clock, we were nearly there, I didn't realize we had been silent for so long.
"Why do you ask?" I could feel her gaze as it settled upon me.
"I was just wondering." I ignored the pang in my heart that told me that I was lying to myself. We were on the street of the diner now, and panic was beginning to set in. I was kidding myself, I needed her, I couldn't let her marry him.
"Come on, Edward, I think I know you well enough by now to know that something had been on your mind this entire ride. Now spill." her voice took on a demanding edge to it and I knew she wasn't going to let it drop. I suddenly wished I'd never said anything.
"Come on, Edward, you know you can trust me." sh persisted as I pulled the car into a spot next to Emmet's jeep. I sighed as I turned it off.
"Bella, I just- Jacob well Jacob he's-" I started, the words lodging themselves in my throat. I ran a hand through my hair and sighed once again, allowing myself to build up the nerve to tell her what I had been so stupid not to have realized before.
"Bella, I know that I'm probably too late, and that you may never want to see me again after this. But today, Jacob came into my room before you got up to tell Alice and I something...He told us that he planned to ask for your hand tonight," she opened her mouth to say something but before she could get a word out I launched myself forward and silenced her mouth with my own. The chaste action was enough to flood my body with heat. "Don't marry him, Bella, I - I love you. I can't believe I was so blind to not have seen it before. But as soon as he told us, well, it was like I was seeing you behind a veil for the last decade; but it seems like his words lifted it, and I could see you clearly. I love you, Bella. I can see it now.
The silence in the air was thick, the words I had spoken seemed to have stuck to the air like glue, suffocating me. Something flashed in Bella's eyes as I waited for her to say something, anything. When she did it seemed like every word drove a blade through my heart.
"You picked a hell of a time to tell me didn't you? Who the hell do you think you are?" her voice was cold as it floated through me. I was to stunned to stop her as she got out of the car and stomped into the restaurant. What had I done?
