Thank you to all the encouraging posts from people who seem to really want me to continue. This is for you... I really appreciate the kindness and support. x


The buzzing sound seemed so far away, until it was not. The noise drifts closer and closer until the blankets are peeled back from the cozy cocoon only one bare arm is forced outside to grasp the phone haphazardly pressing the screen until the buzzing stops. Pulling the phone down into the warmth of the bed attempting to mutter one recognizable word, which comes out much deeper and raspier than she intended, and what eventually escapes is not even a word.

"hmmph"

"Amelia is that you?"

"uh huh"

"She found out. Dr. Herman knows I pretty much stole her medical records. She is mad. I mean mad, like really, really mad. Like the kind of mad that makes you do things before you actually think them through, which is what I think just happened…"

"Arizona shut up. Where are you?"

"The police station."

Amelia throws the covers off herself, bolting upright in bed, "Did you get arrested?"

"Something like that, could you come get me?"

Rubbing the palms of her hands over her sleepy eyes, hoping to will them awake. "Yeah, give me half hour and I will be there."

Amelia steps through the paint chipped metal doorway where she was told to wait by a nice man who looked more like a mild mannered math professor than a police officer. She immediately is aware of her surroundings, the woman to her right has track marks inching up her arm, the place where her worn, over-sized shirt is too big and she must push the sleeves up, forcing the garment to fit on her tiny frame at all. Sunken eyes, glazed over, a hollow fog that seeps from the woman is a dead giveaway to her woes. Amelia could almost taste the woman's high as she was left starring at the ghost in front of her that was once her own reflection. Beginning to feel the tightness in her chest, she forces herself to take a slow, deep breath counting to five in her head, when suddenly a different sensation surrounds her, breaking Amelia free from the moment.

Arizona throws her arms around Amelia who freezes for a split second, before giving into the embrace, "Thank you so much for coming to get me. I was going to call Callie but didn't want to wake Sofia or have to explain why I am at the police station at this hour."

"Hey, no problem, are you okay?" looking the blonde over.

"What a mess, but yes I am fine and in the end charges were dropped but I am not convinced Nicole will not sue me."

"Let's get out of here and I will tell you everything."

Sitting in Derek and Meredith's kitchen waiting for the coffee to finish brewing the reality of what has happened over the last several hours is starting to sink in, as does the panic.

Amelia grabs two mugs from the deep maple stained cabinet in front of her, "Just start at the beginning and tell me exactly what happened."

Arizona shakes her head in affirmation, thinking back to the moment that started it all…

"Robbins, let's go for a drink tonight, I don't have many chances left and I can't even remember the last time I said those words to someone, plus I have eaten all the ice cream flavors Ben and Jerry's has to offer, I need to move on to other things."

Furrowed brows of disbelief reveal Arizona is not exactly sure how to react but she does anyway, "uh, well, okay sure."

"After shift and you're buying, you owe me after all."

"I do?"

"Yes, I am giving you a fast track, once in a life time master class in being the best specialty peds surgeon in the world and that alone deserves well-aged bourbon I would think."

Nodding a skeptical affirmation, still unable to believe what she is hearing, "Right."

Amelia put a mug of steaming hot coffee in front of her, "Go, on."

Sipping the welcome caffeinated life- line in a cup offered to her, Arizona takes a deep breath before continuing. "Everything was fine; we were at Joe's bar, Dr. Herman was fine, she was very happy with the Pappy Van Winkle 12 year bourbon that the bartender had recommended, I was actually having a good time too, until her phone rang...

"Hold on JoAnn, I can't hear you." Holding up a finger in Arizona's direction, she mouths the words, "Be right back."

Within minutes everything would change, the table, the drinks and the work Dr. Arizona Robbins had done over the last several months would be turned upside down. The firm hand on her shoulder would pull her around until she was facing her accuser.

"How could you? You think you have the right to somehow break into my personal private hell that has taken me months to figure out, to find one small space of solid ground and you pull that out from me?" You Dr. Robbins are done, with me, my work and if I have anything to do with it being a doctor."

What happened next was an unfortunate accident, one of those moments that you would never think could actually happen and if you tried a hundred times over, you would never be able to recreate no matter how hard you tried. The intent did not matter in the end, all the blonde wanted to do was make the swirling waters stop for one moment, to speak reason and bring calm to the crushing waves that now crashed down around them both.

The hand was meant to pacify the anger, emphasize a point she was trying to make but the momentum was too powerful, the intent had more force fueled by sheer desperation in order to make Dr. Herman just stop screaming the harsh accusations and listen. The cheap wine glass sailed out of Arizona's hand crashing into the bar then ricocheting into Dr. Herman's face, breaking the skin, drawing first blood and causing quite the scene. It happened fast, and Arizona is not sure where the cop came from but when he asked Nicole if she would like to press charges Arizona would hear the response ringing in her head for the next several hours, "Damn fucking straight I do."

Amelia leans against the kitchen island for some support, she looks Arizona's way, one single word escapes through her lips, "Fuuuck."

It is that single word that pulls hard at the dangling thread, unraveling Arizona as the salt betrays her eyes and the tears fall in a free for all down her face. Amelia does not really do emotions, it's just not her thing but as she looks at the vulnerability cracking wide open in the transparent blue eyes in front of her she can't help but respond.

"Hey, come here." The blond falls into her chest, it's easy and effortless as the curtain of tears continues to fall leaving Amelia's shirt stained with Arizona's fear and uncertainly, she feels the warmth between them, acknowledging on some level to herself that she does not mind the closeness.

"Listen to me; we are going to figure it all out. I know it seems really, really fucking bad right now, but it will be end up not being as bad as we think it is, I promise."

Arizona just pulls herself into the warm crook of Amelia's neck seeking refuge, and the other woman lets her.


Arizona assumed the other members of the board would be present and waiting for her when she was paged for an emergency meeting in the administration offices at the hospital. She would just tell them the truth, while she had in fact broken many rules including the ethics code of the hospital, she would simply make her case and let the rest fall to fate. She grasps the coolness of the metal doorknob, mustering up all the courage she can and then with a purposeful twist she prepares to stand her ground.

"Hello, Arizona."

There is no board, no buzzing chatter, and no one else in the room.

"Oh, Hi Dr. Herman", Arizona immediately feels guilty as she looks at the sutured cut on the doctor's face and the bruising surrounding it.

"I am so sorry."

"Let's clarify, would that be about the laceration to my face or stealing my personal private property?"

Slowly stepping forward, "I am sorry about the accident with the glass and I am so very sorry you are upset, but what I am not sorry about is getting a copy of your scans."

The intimidating laugh that flies from Dr. Herman's mouth is cutting and harsh, "You're not sorry because you felt entitled since I picked you for the program? Perhaps you have somehow misinterpreted our professional rapport so you now feel you can deceitfully lie, scheme and steal something so private to me that no one else knows about the condition but my treating doctors and you. Do you understand the sanctity in that Robbins?"

"I do."

"Ah, you do, okay well then what in the hell did you think would happen? That you would be able to miraculously shop them around and find a miracle for me? The best in the world have looked at these scans, there are no miracles in my prognosis and you of all people should understand that! I will be reporting what happened to Dr. Hunt, I thought you should know." Ending the conversation Dr. Herman briskly walks toward the door; with her hand on the polished silver knob that she is just about to turn until she is stopped dead in her tracks.

"WAIT!"

The hand on the door knob freezes and the older doctor does not move.

"I know it was wrong okay, I get that it violated all kind of ethical rules and codes but you are what I have left. I have you. Crotchety, hard-nosed, brilliant you that is what remains after my marriage and life have fallen apart. I wanted to hate you, I DID hate you for a while but now I don't and it's not pity so don't yell at me for that, ok? I actually enjoy you and I would really like it if you didn't die."

Silence swirls around them and Arizona is not sure if Nicole is going to yell at her or leave. Instead , after a moment she quietly responds.

"We can't always get what we want, Robbins."

Without thinking the words exploded out of her like a cork in a bottle of champagne, hitting Dr. Nicole Herman in the square center of her being.

"Amelia Shepherd has figured out a way to remove your tumor."


Thank you very much for taking the time to read. I appreciate all comments and thoughts as long as they are respectful and once again thank you all who wrote such inspiring and kind words. I appreciate the chance to write this story. xx