Shock ran through her body as his lips connected with hers. It took less then a second for that shock to turn into need. Not lust - need. She needed him, more than she needed air or food. She needed him - his lips, his hands, his beautiful black eyes with the deep green irises. She felt her body move against her will, molding itself against his. His hands travelled from her shoulders to her hips, pulling her tighter against him. She moaned into his lips, her hands finding the soft gills on his neck. He let out a sensual moan as her fingers trailed down the soft, pink skin.

He pulled away, leaving her panting and grasping at him, begging him for more without speaking. He pressed his forehead to hers and chuckled softly; the sound was music to her ears.

"Siha," he rasped, his voice deeper then usual, deepened with lust. "I can not tell if you are a gift or a punishment." His lips found her throat, making her moan as he kissed his way up to her ear. "I fear, sometimes, that you may be both," he whispered, his hot breath making her insides flutter uncontrollably. He nibbled gently on her earlobe, eliciting another desperate moan from her. He seemed to be enjoying teasing her.

"I'm whatever you want me to be," she gasped, "as long as you don't stop kissing me."

She heard him chuckle again and felt a hand wrap up into her hair, tugging gently to pull her head back, giving him better access to her neck and chest. He kissed the tender skin of her neck slowly, sensually, his mouth moving far too slowly towards her breasts, his fingers running up her stomach, under her shirt...

Shepard gasped as she awoke, the white walls seeming like an all too familiar hell. She turned to her side in an attempt to get more comfortable so she could sleep again and return to her dreams, to Thane, where she belonged.

Only instead of more white walls, icy blue eyes met hers.


"Garrus," Shepard rasped, her throat too dry to make any real sound. Garrus doubted he'd have heard her if he was human.

"Hey, Cadi," he said softly as he reached for her water, bringing the straw to her lips. He smiled when she took the cup into her own hand and drank greedily, the straw making a sucking sound as it emptied. "Do you want some more?" he asked gently.

She shook her head and handed the cup back to him, settling on to her back, her eyes on the ceiling. "Go away, Garrus."

Garrus sighed, setting the cup on the table next to Shepard's bed. "No," he said simply.

Shepard turned to him, anger in her eyes. It lasted maybe a second, but he had seen it before her face had gone blank again, her eyes returning to the ceiling.

"Shepard, please..." he practically begged.

"Joker."

Garrus went with it, just glad to hear her voice again, to see any reaction whatsoever. His voice was a little too excited as he asked, "What about Joker, Cadi?"

Dead eyes met his. There was no expression on her face. Her voice was equally dead when she spoke. "I want to see Joker."

Garrus took a deep breath to steady himself. She had spoken, and not only to answer questions. She had made a request. Her eyes may have been dead, but maybe, just maybe, she wasn't gone after all. His answer was short, to the point, and completely true. "Done." He would drag the pilot there by his hair if he had to.

As he stood, he thought to himself... please let this work. Spirits... let this help her.


"Why would she want to see me?"

Joker sat surrounded by his friends and former colleagues, his head spinning. Every one of them had tried to talk to Shepard and had no success... until now. On top of that, apparently this success involved Shepard asking for him by name.

Why?

He had no fucking clue.

"We don't know, Jeff," Liara said quietly. "But she did. Please talk to her. None of us have gotten through to her, except Garrus."

Garrus cut in then, his voice defeated - not something Joker had ever thought he'd hear from the turian. "And when I did get her to speak," he said quietly, "she asked for you."

Joker shook his head, the reality seeming like a far off dream. "Why me?" he whispered to himself. Of course, Garrus had heard him.

"You've been with her longer than any of us," he said quietly. "Even before Ashley."

Joker sighed, rubbing a hand over his face. "Yeah, but that doesn't mean anything. She was closer to you than me, Vakarian," he said quietly, his voice sounding exhausted even to his own ears.

Garrus shrugged, having no real answer. "Please just talk to her," he practically begged. "She won't talk to anyone else."

"What about Traynor? I thought she was supposed to be here today. They were really close."

Liara shook her head. "I got a message from her this morning. She can't be here until tomorrow."

Joker sighed again, a headache starting to form behind his eyes. "Fine, fine," he agreed reluctantly. "I'll talk to her. For what ever good it will do."

"Thank you," Garrus said, relief evident in his voice. "Thank you, Joker."


Joker had hear about Shepard's coma-like state from his friends, but it hadn't prepared him for the sight in front of him. She lay facing the window, her eyes blank, her skin paler then usual. Her hair had been cut stylishly, Ashley's work no doubt, but the strands hung limply, as if even her hair had decided to give up.

He didn't know what to do, what to say, but he knew he had to do something. He took a deep breath and entered her room. Her eyes turned toward him and she sat up, staring at him as though he were an illusion. He cleared his throat, shoving his hands in to his pockets. "Hey, Shep. You look like hell."

Apparently that wasn't the right thing to say.

Shepard's lower lip trembled, her eyes filling with tears. A choked sound escaped her throat, and then she was all out balling. Huge sobs racked her body as she struggled for air, her hands covering her face. Joker moved over to her, unsure what to do. His hands fluttered uselessly around her until he finally rested a hand on her shoulder. "Hey," he said quietly. "Hey, it's all right. I'm sorry. You don't look that bad, honestly."

A sound that could have been a laugh escaped her and she started to take deep breaths, trying to calm herself. "Yeah, I do," she said. "I'm sorry, Jeff. I'm so sorry."

"It's okay," Joker said, though he had no idea what she was apologizing for. "It's all right, Shepard."

"No," Shepard said, meeting his eyes. "It's not all right. I killed her."

Joker raised a brow. "Killed who, Shepard?"

"EDI," Shepard whispered. "God, I'm so sorry, Jeff. I killed EDI."