A/N: First of all thank you to everyone who has followed/favorited/or reviewed this story! You guys make my heart so happy, and encourage me to keep writing! Sorry for the delay in updating! This chapter gave me a lot of problems. In this chapter we get to know Peter Brooks a little better, and this chapter is the beginning of his relationship with Anna. Just keep it mind that I did promise you a happy Banna ending, and I will deliver! ;)
A huge, massive, THANK YOU and gabillions of hugs to my Twin Beef, handy-for-the-bus. I literally could not have written this chapter without her, and her encouragement!
Hope you guys enjoy this, and please review! xxx
Disclaimer: Same as the last 2 chapters!
The next few weeks continued on much the same way for Anna, as she blindly navigated through her pain. She woke up screaming his name every night like clockwork. Every time the dream was just as vivid as the first time, and every time the pain would almost take her breath away. She was exhausted. She could only pray that she was doing a better job of hiding it then she was handling it.
She walked towards the servant's hall one night to wait there for Lady Mary to ring her for bedtime. It was late, and the only other person there was Mr. Brooks. He must be waiting for His Lordship, she thought to herself. She took a moment to stand back and observe him. He was a fairly attractive man; the other maids had certainly noticed that. His hair was light brown, and she could tell that even though he kept it neat it was curly and probably wild when left untamed. He was tall, and rather slim. She noticed that he was very social and interactive with the other staff. He had exchanged pleasantries and tried to speak with her on a few occasions, but she supposed her demeanor was not very accepting of conversation right now. He must have picked up on that. He was not at all like Mr...she stopped that thought right where it was. It would do no good to start comparing the two of them. Surely it would only cause her more heartache.
He looked up at her as she finally walked in, and gave a quick kind smile before returning to his paper. If he had noticed her observing him, he gave no indication of it. As she sat down she decided a little small talk, and manners on her part wouldn't go amiss. She really hadn't had the opportunity to speak with him yet so she seized the chance.
"So, Mr. Brooks, how are you settling in now that Thomas is gone?"
He looked up from his newspaper, placing it down on the table, and smiled at her.
"Oh quite well, thank you. Mr. Barrow was a bit of a character, but I saw past him. I am quite enjoying the job now."
Anna was relieved that he had seen through Thomas.
"Oh good. I did mean to warn you about him, but I am afraid time got away from me. I'm glad that you are enjoying things now." She gave him a tired smile.
"Well thank you, Miss..." He paused waiting for her.
"Oh please, just call me Anna. I am just a housemaid after all."
"Housemaids are wildly underestimated in my opinion." He smiled at her, and she gave him a weak smile in return.
"Well that's a very bold statement, Mr. Brooks," she tried to tease, and he winked at her. Not in a flirtatious way, she noted, but more in the way of silly banter.
Just then Lady Mary's bell went off, and she began to get up to go to her.
"Have a good night, Anna. Thank you for the chat." He smiled at her, and she replied, "You too, Mr. Brooks. Good night." Returning his smile she turned, and ascended the stairs. Praying for a peaceful night she knew wouldn't come.
He watched Anna worriedly as she left the servants hall to tend to Lady Mary. He had not worked up the nerve to ask her if she was alright. He could tell just in the short month he had been here that she had not been sleeping the last few weeks.
'You barely know her Peter, you have no right to ask her such things.' He knew that was true, but Anna had been so kind to him since he came to Downton. In a strange way he did feel like he knew her. Probably because the instant he met her, he was immediately reminded of his mother. She had the same inner beauty that radiated out of her like sunshine, and enhanced her equally stunning outer beauty. As he observed her more the similarities only grew. She was so patient, and was always willing to lend a helping hand when needed. He couldn't help it he felt drawn to her.
But there was something lingering behind her eyes, something he couldn't quite put his finger on. Resentment? Pain? Sadness? As he started to take notice of these deeper parts of her, he began to notice how tired she was becoming. More so every day in fact. He found himself wondering why she wasn't sleeping? Why she hardly smiled? And when she did, why didn't it reach her eyes?
It wasn't his place to wonder these things, but wonder he did.
As he laid his head to the pillow that night, he said a silent prayer for Anna, and made up his mind that he would make it his goal to help her find her smile again.
The next day Peter sat quietly in the servant's hall doing some mending; while he listened to Ms. O'Brien do some of her usual complaining. It hadn't taken him long to recognize her type. Sneaky, spiteful, with a pension for gossip. He always tried to steer clear of people like her.
He was dragged from his thoughts, and realized that her attentions were now on him.
"So, Mr. Brooks, you don't have a secret wife we don't know about do you?
He was caught off guard, "A wife? No. Why would you ask that?"
He noticed the look on her face, and sighed when he realized he had just taken her bait.
"The man you replaced, Mr. Bates, he had an infatuation with our Anna, you see. Didn't bother to tell anyone that he had a wife waiting for him. She shows up, and the next thing you know he's riding off with her down the lane. Leaving us here to deal with Anna sulking around, nursing her broken heart. She should have known better. Always knew there was something off about that Mr. Bates."
So that was it. That was the reason for the sadness behind her eyes, and probably the reason she wasn't sleeping. This Mr. Bates had broken her heart. How could someone do something like that to her? He bit his tongue, fighting his gut reaction to defend Anna against this heartless assessment of her heartbreak. He was not about to let Ms. O'Brien have the satisfaction of an argument. Especially when he didn't have all the facts.
"Well I assure you, Ms. O'Brien, I have no secret wives laying around."
Just then his Lordship's bell rang. Perfect timing, he quickly put his mending away, and left the servant's hall. His mind filled with thoughts of Anna, and how it made him sick that someone would leave her like that. He knew first hand the burden a broken heart could bring to one's life. He wanted to help her get through this; let her know she wasn't alone. He felt this fierce need to protect her, and he couldn't quite place where that need stemmed from. He shook that thought away; she didn't need to be pressured right now. He just needed her to know that he understood her pain, and find a way to help her.
His spent the rest day trying to figure a way to do just that.
It had been another long exhausting day for Anna, and she felt every bit of it as she made her way down to the servant's hall. She needed a cup of tea before bed. It always seemed to help her settle down after a day like this...or at least it used to.
She noticed light coming from the servant's hall as she made her way down the stairs. Mrs. Hughes must have left one lit for her knowing that Lady Mary was running late. Surely no one else was up at this hour.
She went directly to the kitchen to put a kettle on, and started when she saw that there was already one going. Just then she felt a presence behind her. She jumped back and turned around letting a loud gasp.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to startle you." It was Mr. Brooks with his hands in the air as if in surrender. She took a deep breath.
"Quite alright, I just didn't think anyone would be up at this hour."
She turned then to tend the kettle, but he stopped her before she could reach it.
"Here allow me. Please don't take offense, but you look like you could use a rest. Go sit down, and I will bring the tea." The smile he gave her was so sincere that she found she couldn't refuse. Her feet were aching like mad.
"Alright, thank you. I will do that." She returned the smile, and turned to go back to the servant's hall completely unaware of his concerned gaze as it followed her.
It didn't take him long to get the tea ready, and on the tray to take in to her. He stood back and studied the tray. It needed something. He wanted to do something to cheer her up a little. Suddenly it came to him! He ducked out the back door, grabbed a little bundle of wild flowers and put them in a cup on her tray. It was simple, but he hoped it would make her smile a little. He then proudly picked up the tray, and took off for the servant's hall.
The moment Anna sat down she felt the day catch up with her. She was so exhausted. Last nights dream had been longer than the others. It had taken longer to scream her way out of it, and then she hadn't been able to go back to sleep. Lady Mary had been particularly short today, but with the appearance of Mr. Matthew with his new fiancé, Anna was neither surprised nor offended by Lady Mary's behavior. Walking on eggshells around her though had only added to her current mood. She heard Mr. Brooks coming down the hall, and straightened herself up.
He came around the corner with a massive grin on his face.
"Surprise. I thought this might... Anna?"
She felt like she someone had knocked all the wind out of her. When Mr. Brooks came around the corner with the tea tray, and she saw the flowers she was immediately transported back in time. The moment she knew he loved her. The moment she knew...the flashback hit her with a sudden wave of fresh grief.
She was vaguely aware of him setting the tray down and quickly rounding the table. He was by her side as she gasped for air, sobbing uncontrollably.
"Anna, what's happened? What's wrong? Should I call for Mrs. Hughes, or the doctor?"
He was rubbing circles on her back trying his best to calm her. She could hear the worry and distress in his voice, but she could not bring herself to answer him. As the sobs began to subside she became embarrassed. She had somehow made her way to crying on his chest, and she felt one of his arms around her awkwardly. She quickly pulled back, and wiped the remaining tears from her swollen face.
"I am so sorry, Mr. Brooks. What you must think of me...acting this way...I think I must go..."
"Anna, it's alright. You are obviously upset..."
She felt the tears coming again, and bit her lip to try and stop them.
"Anna, what's wrong?...and who is John...?" He asked the question shyly as if he didn't really want to ask it, and he already knew the answer.
"How did you...why did you ask that?"
"You were saying his name over and over again while you were crying. Is he the same as this Mr. Bates that I've heard about? Is he the one who broke your heart?"
She was absolutely shocked that he knew all of this, when she hadn't so much as breathed a word of Mr. Bates since he left. Someone must have told him. She felt the anger bubbling up inside of her. Mr. Bates may have left her broken, but she knew he had a good reason...even if he didn't see fit to tell her what it was. Even so she was not about to sit back and let people spread rumors about him; about them.
She took a deep breath trying to calm herself down, and pulled herself away from his awkward attempt to comfort her.
"Where did you hear that?"
He must have read the anger on her face and in her voice, because he quickly took up an apologetic tone.
"Anna...I didn't... I didn't mean to pry, honestly. Ms. O'Brien brought it up yesterday, and I..."
She scoffed, "Ms. O'Brien? You shouldn't believe everything you hear, Mr. Brooks. Especially when it's coming from someone who thrives off gossip better than they do oxygen."
He looked at her with a sympathetic expression. "So she was lying? This Mr. Bates didn't leave you here broken hearted to go back with his wife?"
She jumped to her feet, "How dare you! You have no idea...there is no way you could possibly understand..."
"But that's just it, Anna, I do understand. I'm sorry that I was so blunt before, but you see I knew Ms. O'Brien didn't have all the facts. However I do know that something has been bothering you. I can tell that you aren't sleeping Anna...that you aren't happy. I can tell because I have seen the signs before. In my mother a long time ago...and in myself."
She slowly began to calm down as he spoke. She could see the obvious concern on his face, and he was right. He had seen everything she had been trying so hard to hide. Obviously without much success. She found herself hanging on his every word, sensing in him an understanding that few others had. The understanding of brokenness and love. After a moment he continued to speak.
"Anna I truly did not mean to upset you, and I am deeply sorry for that. I just want you to know that I understand. If in fact it is true that this man broke your heart then I want you to know that I have been where you are, and I know this pain. You are not alone in this. And if you ever need someone to talk to...well, you can come to me anytime."
She took a deep breath trying to decide what to do. Could she trust him? Someone she barely knew to share this pain with her? She looked down at him as he still sat in the chair next to hers. In the back of her mind she noticed that he was sitting on the opposite side of her from the side John used to occupy. As she looked into his eyes she saw nothing but genuine concern, and understanding. She always prided her herself on being able to read people. She knew in the truest part of herself that Mr. Brooks was sincere.
She slowly looked away, and sat back down next to him. Then she turned and looked at him, steeling her courage from somewhere deep inside of her.
"Mr. Brooks..."
"Please, Anna...call me Peter. It's just us down here after all." He gave her a sweet smile.
"Very well...Peter...you say you've been through what I've been through. That you understand, and I believe you. But you see, all you know about my situation are half-truths you heard from someone who wouldn't know the truth if it smacked her."
He opened his mouth to speak, to apologize again she was sure, but she needed to get this out before her courage abandoned her.
"No I need to say this, because I will not have Ms. O'Brien trying to convince people that Mr. Bates used me, then left me. I will not stand by while people try to tarnish his good name with lies. So I am going to tell you the truth."
He nodded solemnly, as if he knew how difficult this was going to be for her. She had a feeling he knew exactly how difficult.
"Take your time Anna. The tea is still warm, and I'm not going anywhere."
He poured out the tea, as she began to pour out her heart.
Thank you for reading! Please review xx
