"Whatever it is you're seeking won't come in the form you're expecting."
― Haruki Murakami
Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note, or any of the characters or ideas original to Death Note.
December 31, 2003
2:21 P.M.
"I see. There are only six of us. Still, I am thankful that there are at least six of us who are completely devoted to catching Kira."
Chief Soichiro Yagami stood before the task force outside of the police station for a private meeting, which now consisted of Takako Nakamura, Ide Hideki, Shuichi Aizawa, Matsuda Touta, and Hirokazu Ukita. A considerably less amount of people than earlier than same day, but it was better than nothing. They were to discuss if they were would go on to meet L in person.
Until that point, the task force had been shrinking in numbers day by day. Distrust for the faceless detective known as L had been at an all time low, especially after news had leaked to the police about the fact L had sent a group of FBI agents to investigate the Japanese police. All of those FBI agents had all died of heart attacks on the same day, it was clear the only perpetrator would have been Kira himself. Anyone would valued their life more than catching Kira had taken this act as a very serious threat and took their opportunity to leave.
Still, it was hard for Takako imagine it would end up like this. She looked around her at the men, all of whom she knew and worked with. The reality that she may see them die in the foreseeable future was an inescapable fact since Kira made it patently obvious he wouldn't hesitate to kill anyone in his way. However, Takako knew she would be willing to risk her life in order to help catch Kira. After all, her entire life seemed as though it culminated to this moment, this case in a career she had put all of her life's purpose into.
"About L…" Takako started. She hesitated for a moment after everyone's eyes were suddenly on her and cleared her throat. "...I just meant to ask. Do you really think that he will meet us now? What's so different now that he can't continue talking to us from a computer screen?"
Ide grunted. "Why the Hell are you asking us? Like I know his motivations. I'm just here to do my job. I'm as clueless as you are when it comes to L."
Takako simply nodded. It was just like Ide to say something like that. Still, with so few people remaining in the task force she felt ill at ease to see that kind of attitude just prior to meeting L. She kept her mouth shut. "Right…"
Aizawa grunted, also appearing apprehensive at Ide's words. "I suppose there's no knowing what he'll do..."
"He could send a proxy for all we know."
Takako dug her manicured nails into her palm. She hadn't even considered that possibility. "No, I really don't think so. He wouldn't have much to gain from a move like that, would he?"
"Think about it," Chief Yagami interjected firmly. "People have been dropping out of the task force left and right since the investigation started. Everyone who stands here now has proven that they are willing to sacrifice their lives in the name of justice. Only to those few would L show his real identity to."
I suppose… that makes sense. Takako bit her bottom lip pensively. She wanted to feel excited at the opportunity to meet the detective she had heard so much about, even spent years chasing, but in the place of excitement was a tight knot of anxiety in her stomach. The past few weeks of grueling work yielded little to no concrete information about Kira. Something told her that L choosing to reveal his identity to the task force now couldn't be good news.
"I trust L!" Matsuda said. "I think that makes complete sense… Now that the task force has been narrowed down to only those devoted to the investigation, he knows who he can trust! After all… there's no way we can solve this case without him!"
"Actually, I've made up my mind. You can count me out." Ide furrowed his brow even deeper than usual. "You don't need to worry, I have no intention of finding L."
Ide turned on his heel and briskly began walking back into the police station. Somehow in spite of his wavering, Takako was still shocked. She hadn't expected Ide of all people to simply walk away. Although Takako hadn't exactly always seen eye to eye with Ide or his way of doing things, he was one of the people she respected the most out of all the investigators. He was a serious and competent investigator who stuck to his convictions fiercely. The others exchanged awkward glances.
"No! Ide!" Takako was about to start after him before Chief Yagami grabbed her arm.
"Stop. Let him go, Nakamura. He was clearly on the fence about this from the beginning."
"A-ah… Yes, sorry about that." Takako watched Ide disappear through the doors, flustered. The Chief let go of her arm as soon as she relaxed, letting it fall down to her side. It was truly a disappointment to lose yet another task force investigator at such a critical time, but there no was stopping Ide once he made up his mind and it would be foolish to even try to persuade someone to do something that put their life at risk. I just looked like a complete idiot, didn't I…
Ukita grinned assuredly in spite of the fact that six had become 5. "Well, I'm in. I want to catch Kira."
"As do I," Takako spoke clearly. This was the point of no return. Each passing second brought her closer to the moment she would meet L. Closer to the information he would share with them, the resources he held that would be instrumental in solving this case. Rookie or not, this would be the definitive moment in her career in which she became a genuine detective.
The meeting had already been carefully arranged by L. The task force was to split into groups and meet him in his hotel at precisely midnight, marking the new year. Takako had arrived at the luxury hotel by taxi with the Chief, making their way inconspicuously through the new year's crowd in the lobby. Most people on this night would be celebrating, making memories with those they care about if they didn't drink too much to forget it. The long elevator ride to the penthouse suite was as silent as the cab ride. Takako chanced a sideways glance at the Chief who stared straight ahead of himself at the elevator doors. She knew Yagami had a family at home, and she wondered what he told them he was doing that night, if they even knew the patriarch of the family was heading the Kira investigation. She suppressed a sigh as she thought about her own family, who really had no idea what was going on.
When the doors opened, the Chief stepped aside to allow Takako to exit first. She could already see the end of the corridor and her colleagues standing there waiting. She checked her watch as she walked towards the suite. 11:59 P.M. Just on time.
Takako walked straight past the men towards the door, resting her hand firmly on the brass doorknob and took one last backwards glance at her Chief nodded once and she finally pushed the door open and stepped into the suite shortly after followed by the men. She wasn't sure what she was expecting, who she thought could possibly be on the other side of that door. She almost didn't believe her eyes as she was stopped dead in her tracks.
There stood a disheveled young man, who looked like he couldn't have been older than Takako herself. He had shaggy black hair that starkly contrasted his white complexion, so white that it appeared this man hadn't seen the light of day in his entire life. The man was casually dressed in loose fitting jeans and a white long sleeved shirt that hung off of a gaunt frame. He was hunched over in an unnatural position, his bare feet rubbing against each other.
"I'm L." The man spoke in a low monotone. Not quite bored, rather void of emotion or inflection.
The others introduced themselves one after the other after a moment's shared confusion, taking out their badges as they did. Takako brought her own badge from her jacket once she managed to bring herself out of her daze. If this man was truly L, it was clear that he had no desire to keep up appearances.
"Nakamura, Takako."
L's eyes came into direct contact with hers as she spoke her name. Large, unblinking obsidian eyes that were framed with impossibly dark eye circles that put her own to shame. Takako felt as though she could crumble under this intense gaze, feeling as though this man was scrutinizing her very character as she tried to maintain a bold disposition. This exchange that lasted mere seconds proved to the the longest few seconds of her life.
L brought his hand up from his side, pointing his finger at the group of investigators as though he were wielding a gun. "Bang."
"What the-?!" Matsuda exclaimed, looking at the others' bewildered expressions.
"I now know all of your names and faces, Matsuda Touta. If I were Kira, you all would be dead by now. Let's not carelessly throw our lives away," L explained without skipping a beat, walking over towards the seating area of the large suite. He took a seat in the plush upholstered chair, or rather sat on his feet and hunched over forward in an even more bizarre position. He stuck the tip of his thumb in his mouth, chewing idly.
This isn't the best start to our relationships with L… Takako swallowed, feeling already as if she were a child being reprimanded. There wasn't any retort she could come up with, after all he was right. Still, she had assumed both parties would be able to trust each other…
The taskforce had joined him in the seating area once they had turned off all of their cellphones and left them at the front of the room, as per L's request. Everyone seemed a bit on edge despite the nature of this meeting being not only to meet but to trust L. L waited for everyone to make themselves comfortable in the seats around the coffee table. Takako rested her hands on her knees, sat between Matsuda and the Chief on the sofa.
"Will you begin by telling us your thoughts on the Kira case, L?" Chief Yagami broke the silence.
"Please refer to me from this point on as Ryuzaki. For safety purposes I wouldn't want anyone to find out my true identity as L."
R-ryuzaki..? Surely an alias… He doesn't look like a Ryuzaki at all. I can't even be sure if he's Japanese. Takako wrung her hands together as she hung onto L's, or rather Ryuzaki's, words as he began to detail his profile on Kira.
January 1st 2004
6:57 A.M
"Nishimoto, Tanako."
The sun had begun to rise in the early morning after a long night spent in the hotel. Ryuzaki had proposed to meet each investigator privately towards the end of their meeting, supposedly in order to determine that none of them could possibly be Kira. Takako finally came last, sitting down opposite Ryuzaki with the coffee table in between them. Ryuzaki had addressed Takako by her new alias, a name she would assume while working on the Kira investigation in order to protect her true identity. Though the others made it clear they were uncomfortable with the idea of using aliases to the extent of owning fake police badges, Takako was secretly pleased - all of her efforts would be pointless if she came into a situation where she needed to show her police badge only to lose her life.
"Don't be so tense." Ryuzaki had begun pouring himself coffee from the carafe and adding sugar cups into his cup one by one until they piled up and towered over the cup. He noticed Takako's expression and gestured to the carafe. "Sorry, how rude of me. Please help yourself to the coffee."
"Ah… No thank you, I'm alright." Takako noticed both her legs and arms were crossed and her back stiff. Indeed, she was even more uncomfortable being alone in a room with this strange man. She tried to relax her position and only looked more awkward in doing so.
"Alright, if you say so… You're starting to look tired."
I'm the one who looks tired? Has he seen the state of himself…?
"Why are you here?" Ryuzaki stirred the sugar in his coffee with a tiny spoon, watching as the cubes melted and turned his coffee into a thick black sludge. He brought the steaming cup to his lips and took a sip.
"Huh? You mean why do I want to catch Kira?"
"Sure. You're a young woman with her life ahead of her. Why would you want to throw that all away to catch some elusive supernatural killer? It's not too late to return to the NPA as a regular detective and spare your life. No one can judge you for doing so."
Takako brisked. Though she was sure she was being tested, she couldn't help but feel attacked somehow. "I'm sure you didn't say that to any of the men, did you? I don't care about any of that. I have devoted my life to my career and to justice. I would never be able to live with myself if I walked away now… No, I want to catch Kira. That's the only thing I care about."
"I see…" Ryuzaki brought his thumb back into his mouth after returning the cup to its saucer. "You're more headstrong than I originally thought."
Takako felt her complexion heat up. "I'm confused, what does this have to do with eliminating me from being Kira? I thought that was why you were meeting with everyone privately. Are you trying to get me to leave the investigation? I may be relatively inexperienced to someone like you-"
"I'm simply trying to get a grasp on your motivations and what kind of person you are. Please try not to be so hot-headed," Ryuzaki said lightly, as though he were analysing a character in a film rather the person sat directly across from him.
Takako had no idea what to say in response to that. It was like he was trying to provoke a response from her with each seemingly pointless observation of her character. It wasn't until she felt a sharp pain in her palms that she realized she was digging her nails into her skin.
"What about your family?"
Takako knit her brows tighter, thinking about how the detective probably already looked her up and therefore would have known this easily obtainable information about her, but answered anyway. "Well, both of my parents are retired and living in Shimane. I have a younger sister who lives Edogawa with her husband and child. I haven't exactly told any of them that I am on the Kira investigation, and especially not any details about what I'm doing."
"Hmm right, right..." Ryuzaki sounded bored by the information he had just asked for. "What about a boyfriend, or fiancée?"
"Huh?" Takako's face went blank. "No, of course not. I don't have time for that."
"Is that so? You're a 25 year old woman."
"Is that all?" Takako asked after she managed to stop the wheels turning in her head. I can't tell if he's trying to determine how dedicated I am or just trying to gauge my reaction… "I don't know if there's anything meaningful that I could say that would eliminate the possibility that I could be Kira. I certainly don't fit the profile you have created of a young Japanese student, nor do I associate with anyone fitting that description. Perhaps you don't think of me as potentially being linked to Kira at all but you needed to give everyone the same treatment."
"The possibility of you, or any of your colleagues for that matter, actually being Kira was next to none. Still, it would be foolish of me to not explore every avenue. Nonetheless… I had set up various traps from the beginning and if any of you happened to be Kira, it would have easily become known to me."
So speaking to each of us privately, was a waste of time? Or have I missed something entirely…
"I see."
There was something off about him, about the entire situation. Takako didn't want to believe the strange man before her really could be L, but there was no way she could deny it - even if she wanted to, she would have no way to prove it. All she knew is that it was even harder to trust the world famous detective having met him than simply talking to him through a computer screen. He was an impossible person to read, and that alone frustrated Takako to no end.
Ryuzaki had already begun to pour himself another cup of coffee, repeating the ritual from before. "Let's conclude this meeting by me asking you one more question."
Already? "Alright."
"What are your thoughts on Kira? In other words, who do you think he is, and what is your theory on how he kills?"
Takako didn't need a moment's time to answer him. "There's obviously no specific answer to that question, but I believe Kira is simply a regular person who somehow obtained this power. He's most likely someone who is charismatic, who would be able to blend in with any crowd without arising anyone's suspicion about who he really is or what he does. That he may even be a psychopath, or at least exhibit similar traits such as lack of remorse or a grandiose sense of self worth. As for how he is able to kill… I can't say. This power he possesses might be previously unknown to humans, something we couldn't explain or track even with modern forensic evidence. We can't be sure until we catch him."
"A power unknown to humans… I can see you have thought a lot about this." Ryuzaki downed another cup of sugar coffee, tilting his head back as he finished to catch the thick sugary paste that lingered on the bottom of the cup. "It will be a pleasure to have you working with us on this investigation. Watari, please escort the others back here."
1:23 pm
Takako's fingers fumbled clumsily with her lighter, trying in vain a few times to ignite a flame against the wind blowing her way. She already felt frozen to her core after being outside mere minutes in her work attire, her blouse and skirt now wrinkled from having worn them for two days. Her fingers wouldn't stop trembling, mirroring the ragged breaths that filled her vision. She wasn't sure what was wrong with herself, telling herself that perhaps days of sleep deprivation were starting to wear her down.
"Uh, Taka - I mean, Nakamura? Do you need help?"
Takako knew before she even looked up that it was Matsuda. "You certainly have a habit of finding your way to me, no matter where I may be…"
"Uh - sorry, is it problem? I can leave-"
"Don't." Takako cut him off with a sigh.
Matsuda gave in to a sheepish smile, leaning in to take the lighter out of her icy hands and causing her to stand up straight in surprise. He ignited her cigarette easily with his back against the wind and she took a long drag. Takako couldn't find it in herself to be annoyed in his presence as she normally was. Perhaps it was because Matsuda had mainly managed to stay out of her way since their last encounter, or maybe she was getting soft. At any rate… I suppose I'm going to have learn to tolerate him after all. We'll be working closely together from this point on. There won't be any use of holding onto foolish pride.
"Is everything alright?"
Takako was snapped out of her thoughts and took a second to register what he just said. "Yeah, of course. I'm just… a little overwhelmed. That's all."
"Oh, yeah…" Matsuda's voice trailed off slightly as he watched his female colleague smoke. "It was a little weird, wasn't it? I still can't be sure if he trusts us or not…"
Takako looked tired, not just because of the dark eye circles that were becoming a consistent part of her complexion. There was more than that. Her eyelids drooped half closed and her shoulders slumped forward, back leaning against the building for support. Her makeup had begun to wear off with mostly clumpy mascara and smudged eyeliner left behind. She laughed, a short and weak laugh as she placed her fist against her forehead.
"Trusts us? How can you be so sure that we can trust him?"
"We don't have much of a choice, I suppose… I can understand why you would feel skeptical but we don't stand a chance on our own. Try to think on the bright side! It's going to be exciting to work with L."
"You wouldn't understand, Matsuda. You had no idea who L was before all this started, did you? But me, on the other hand… I followed his career for years. I suppose I even idolized him. I realize now that it was wrong of me, but I just…" Takako's voice faltered. "I don't know."
"You're… disappointed, right?"
"What?!" Takako's face fell red. "Don't make assumptions like that! I mean, it's just…"
"No," Matsuda pressed. "It's okay. I think I understand now. L wasn't ever a real person to you. He was an ideal. Now that you've met him… the image you had of him was shattered."
"I suppose you're right..." Takako felt her stomach turn. It was almost physically painful to utter those words to Matsuda, but he was right after all. Am I on a different plane? How can Matsuda make me feel so stupid?
"Anyways." Takako turned her heel in the other direction, facing the front door. "We shouldn't
say L anymore. Especially where we could be overheard. It's Ryuuzaki now."
First of all, I'm sorry it took so long to update~ I have been busy lately but I'm gonna try to update around once a week from here on out. I also hope these events did not come off as entirely derivative of the events in Death Note, of course there are some things I can't really change and it wouldn't make a lot of sense to skip. I can't decide if I hate this chapter or not, which is another reason it took me so long to update..heh...
Please tell me what you thought of this chapter in a review, and a big thanks to my reviewers and new followers! Don't be a stranger. :)
