Author's Note:  Not and awfully long part, sorry!  Also thought I'd state for the record, in case anyone was worried, this IS a B/A fic and it WILL have a happy ending.  If I can't get happily ever after in Jossverse, then I'll get it in my, or other's writing.  I am, first and foremost, a B/A shipper to the end.  But even with that being said, I will also say that I am…fond…of B/S.  I'll always pick Angel over Spike, but given the fact that Joss is evil and won't give us B/A loyalists any glimpse of hope for our soulmates, I'd rather have Buffy be with Spike than with a normal boring guy…think Riley.  And before I get flamed for that, I don't mean the Buffy/Spike from season 6…although I love the raw heat and magnetism between the two then, I hated the darkness to it, the way Spike manipulated and played Buffy's mind.  I like their interaction this season (7) though.  I finished writing this part after watching the most recent ep, "Showtime"… and as hypocritical as it may be for a B/A shipper to say this, I was moved by the B/S related scenes.  So if you're wanting to know why this fic is so pro-Spike, this is why.  Please don't flame for this, its just my opinion.  To each their own, as they say.  It's your choice to read, it's my choice what I write.  That's all.  Enjoy.

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Part 3

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Buffy entered the house, closing the door behind her, and leaned back against it.  She closed her eyes and tried to gather herself back together.  It amazed her that even after so much time had passed, that Angel could still scramble her brain.  Everything between them was always so emotionally charged which wasn't necessarily a good thing, but its also what made it all the more real and passionate.

Taking a deep breath she peeled herself off her perch against the door and continued into the house.  She heard the TV on in the living room and knew that Spike was probably in there watching some cheesy TV show as usual.  Knowing that he'd want all the gory details she made her way into the room.

As she entered, Spike turned off the TV and looked at her expectantly, his left eyebrow raised slightly.

"Don't look at me that way," she half snapped at him.

"I wasn't looking at you any such way, just lookin'," he shot back.

"Whatever," she replied with a wave of her hand and plopped herself down on the couch next to him.  "So I guess you wanna know huh?"

"Only if you wanna tell, I wouldn't stop ya if you wanted to spill," he smirked.

"Not much to tell.  We talked.  JUST talked.  That's it," her monotone voice relayed.

"Talk huh.  Rather dull don't ya think?" queried Spike.

"What? You think we were just gonna jump each other and hump like bunnies.  Please, give me some credit.  I do have some self control," huffed Buffy.

"Uh huh.  So what did you and my poof of a sire talk about?" he posed and then pulled the blanket off the back of the couch after he noticed that the slight fall night chill that had fallen was making her cold.

"Thanks.  Mostly, it was just me talking.  I told him about all the big stuff that's gone on since I last saw him.  There was a lot he didn't know…," she hesitated before continuing.  "all the stuff that happened after I was resurrected, for instance.  And the important points from the last few years…the, uh, relationship type stuff."

"Uhh, should I be making plans to move far, very far away?  I'm not really look for my un-life to end just yet," asked an honestly worried Spike.  He'd known Angelus for quite a long time now, and he'd touched his mate.  That type of treachery was not something that would go unpunished.

"No, I think you're safe.  I don't think he'll try to stake you in your sleep.  I mean, yeah, obviously it's not something he's happy about.  He didn't quite come right out and say it, but I could tell.  The anger was there in his eyes," she closed her eyes, the image burned into her head.

"Don't get all mushy now.  I've seen enough of the Buffy/Angel googley eyes to last me a lifetime," harped Spike.

"You never change do you?  And no, I wasn't making googley eyes," stated Buffy emphatically.

"Were to," he replied simply.

"Bite me.  No that wasn't an invitation," she said and then corrected herself.

"Like I'd want your blood anyway, probably make me as bitchy as you," he joked and then grinned at her.  "So what now?"

"Beats me.  He's still in town.  We didn't finish talking cuz I was tired.  I still don't know why he came.  We never got around to that.  So he is going to come by tomorrow so we can…talk…some more," responded Buffy, and unintentional slight smile on her face.

"I saw that smile.  Happy about the prospect of more time with the poof are we?" teased Spike.

"I did not smile, you're imaging things…wouldn't be the first time," Buffy shot back, an innocent smile plastered on her face.

"Did to.  But seriously, are you ok?  I know its gotta be hard seeing him.  I remember what it was like when Dru showed back up last year.  So don't tell me you're fine," he stated, eyes cast downward.

"I'm…okay, I guess.  It's hard.  Things were never simple with me and him, as you well know.  Bad things happen, people get hurt, emotional turmoil ensues.  But, yeah, I'm ok.  I mean, I didn't wake up this morning with the expectation of seeing him.  The shock of it all is just, weird.  I don't know if I ever thought I'd see him again," she replied honestly.

"Are you okay with seeing him again?" he questioned.

"Truthfully, I don't know.  Part of me is grateful to see him again, to know that he is ok, and alive, err still undead, and doing well.  But another part fears it because, as I said, when it comes to the Angel and Buffy show, things never go well," answered Buffy, closing her eyes to calm the emotions beginning to stir.

"What if it's different this time?  Do you want that?" he probed seriously.

"I don't know Spike.  I just…don't know," was all she could answer and then leaned her head against his shoulder.

Within seconds she fell fast asleep, worn out from her daily activities and the unexpected emotional drain when her past decided to revisit her.  Spike sighed, and inwardly hoped that things would work out for her.  He couldn't say that he wouldn't be a little hurt if she got back together with his annoying sire because it would diminish the closeness he had with the person he loved, but wasn't 'in love' with.  But, he thought, she deserved happiness which he knew she'd be able to find with Angel. 

Breaking off his internal thoughts, Spike carefully picked up the sleeping slayer and carried her up to their room.  He placed her into the bed, tucked the covers around her, and set the annoying little pig next to her.

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Across town, Angel entered the mansion, which he still owned, and retreated to his room.  Almost unconsciously he undressed and prepared for bed even though he suspected that sleep would not be forthcoming.  There were too many things to think about.  He'd learned too many things about Buffy's life tonight, too many things were revealed to allow him to slip into a rejuvenating sleep.

The main thing that continuously insisted on reverberating in his head was that of Buffy…and Spike…Buffy and Spike…together.  Just the thought of it made his stomach lurch.  It was a small consolation that Spike now possessed a soul.  But he was still a vampire, he was still his childe (for all intents and purposes), he was still touching what was HIS.  Angel thought briefly about what Angelus would have done if Spike had committed such a crime against his evil counterpart.  A small smile formed on his face at the ideas of torture that infiltrated his mind.  With an audible groan he pushed them away.  Buffy wasn't his anymore.  As much as he wished he did, he did not have the right to act against their…relationship.

Pulling back the covers, Angel stretched his long muscled body out on the silk sheets.  Memories of Buffy and him intertwined together in the bed wafted into his consciousness.  He closed his eyes and ran a hand over his face in frustration.  The things Buffy told him tonight he never expected.  She'd been through so much, she'd survived, she'd flourished and grown, and he hadn't been there to see any of it.  The woman she was now was self-assured, confident, and accepting of her role in life.  She amazed him even more than before, if that was even possible.

Angel contemplated the other things she had told him, Willow's problem with magic, Xander's brush with marriage, and that she had a job.  She hadn't said what it was, just that she had one.  *That must be a first for a slayer* he mused silently.  *The Council must love that.  That's Buffy, always going her own way.*  Angel's thoughts then wandered to something else he had seen on this very revealing night.  The child, the little girl that Spike had been holding.  Who was she?  Nothing Buffy had said gave him any idea to her identity.  Buffy hadn't even said anything that alluded to a child.  He had more than an idle curiosity about the girl, and also a slight pain in his heart that Buffy possibly had a child by another man.  As Angel finally drifted off to sleep he thought only of Buffy, and the beautiful woman she had become.

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As night pervaded, two warriors of good slept dream filled sleep.  Each envisioning the other, seeing the past, the present…the future?  One watched the images with avid interest and a hope filled heart, wishing that it wasn't too late for forever.  Forever.  He'd once promised her forever.  Over the years, the dreams had faded, but never been completely lost.  A silent hope had always lingered in his heart that one day it would be allowed, that there would, for once, no longer be anything standing on the path between them.  Maybe now was not yet that day, he hoped it was, but if it wasn't, he'd continue to hope that there would be a someday.

While one dreamt with hope, another dreamt with fear and weariness.  The sins and pain of the past still too strong to look beyond.  Images of vengeful sires, murderous alter personas, imprisonments in hell, tense togetherness, breakups in sewers,  poisoned arrows, silent goodbyes across a smoke filled street…endless acts of betrayal, intentional or not.  They were all still there to her, almost as fresh as when they originally occurred.  Somewhere inside there was always hope, but it was always out-muscled by visions of the past.  It was too much to hope.  Broken hearts can never truly be healed, they can only be precariously mended.  It tore too much at her hearts tattered whole to consciously believe in someday.

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TBC…feedback gratefully appreciated J