Thank you to OptimusxElita4ever, Jason, Sunstreaker, Elita One, Cmdrtekk, Tiamat1972, Okami-chan, Emily, CuteKitten, V for Valkyrie, Clear Autumn, and Mdnytryder for all your encouragment. Your reviews are so appreciated and always make me want to put up the next chapter faster. This is for you! And keep spreading the word to others who may enjoy this story. All you silent visitors, thank you too! Don't be afraid to leave a review and say hi, it only takes a few minutes.
Chapter 3
"Seems the road goes on and on and it never ends.
And in my heart where I belong is there with you.
You know I'd be right by your side, if I only could.
But on a train car fate I ride.
Now it seems I count a million miles away, soon I'll be comin' home to you.
(Bro) I wanna but there's one more song to play.
So for now I'm gonna close my eyes, pretend you're here with me.
And I'll be with you...when I dream."
Stan Bush
Dear Pollux,
Just in case you get word I've been court-martialed within the next few solar cycles it'll be because I've murdered my new roommate. Yes, you read that right – a Primus-forsaken, smeltin' ROOMMATE!" The slightly less than end of the world news is that they choose the bot I'm most least likely to murder to share my living space with, so it's likely we'll both see you again after all. Hippocrates is indeed blessed by Primus.
It's bad here, Sides. Iacon's more crowded with refugees than the old gladiatorial arenas used to be with fans. You can barely drive down the corridors for nuisance of running over some Micromaster (fuel efficient, ant-droid road kill is more like it). They're everywhere, slagin' things!
So crowded here and still…I've never felt so alone.
Please be in the sky tonight,
Castor
--
From the personal log of CMO Ratchet:
Where do I even begin? Home sweet home! It always looks better from space.
We had to come in on a tricky angle to avoid Decepticon spy satellites and jamming signals. Using the moons as cover, we were able to shield our descent until we could communicate with Iacon. The message was short for fear of interception. We learned two things right off the bat, (in addition to gaining clearance to land). One, they were really glad to see us. Two, thanks to the Decepticon Occupation, the majority of the planet's population of Autobots and neutrals had fled to one of the few safe haven city-states left and, as the human say, there was almost "no room left in the inn."
I saw Prowl and Prime exchange a few words. Then Prowl called Jazz over and the two of them briefly left the cabin together. As soon as we landed, they returned and passed out room assignments. That's when I realized how my good deeds of gallant defense in the face of idiocy were to be rewarded. Given this outcome, I think I should have just kept my slagin' mouth shut. Sunstreaker and I eyed each other with expressions ready to take each other apart, before he looked away again, still broodingly silent. I wasn't so quiet as I cornered Jazz in the cabin, not allowing him out of his seat next to me and waited until everyone else had disembarked.
"Sunstreaker? You stuck me with Sunstreaker!?" I stood, blocking the way to the isle.
"Hey, man. We did the best we could," Jazz looked up at me, spreading his hands apologetically.
"So which of you came up with this slagin', smeltin' - "
"We both decided it was the most logical - "
"Logical? To stick the CMO with a homicidal combat instructor? Why the slag am I not with First Aid!?"
Jazz leaded back, propped one foot on his other knee, and draped an arm over the back of his seat, making himself comfortable as if he might be there a while. "You gonna rant, doc, or are you gonna hear me out?"
Jazz cocked his head and looked at me in a way that made me wish I could see the optics behind that visor of his to help me deduce what had possessed him to reach the conclusion I should room with a sociopathic twin-bot. I folded my arms over my windshield and gave him the same glare I'd given Sunstreaker. It was a look my patients knew well when they pushed me too far, but Jazz appreciated my silence more.
"We made it simple as possible. The Protectobots and Aerialbots are staying together, just like the Dinobots. 'Cept for Hot Spot and Silverbolt, they're roomies for the sake of, well, room. But no point in breakin' them up when they're not used to it."
"So brotherly love trumps me spending more time with my medical assistant. Interesting change of reasoning."
"Hey, doc-bot," Jazz poked a finger in my direction, "We were both on the level as far as the twins went, but I win my battles where I can. Prowl wants to keep Defensor and Superion ready to go at an astrosecond's notice if need be and I agree."
"Fine," I nodded. "That still doesn't explain why I'm stuck with slagin' Sunshine!"
"You stood up for him."
"That doesn't mean I want him for a bunk mate!" I spread my arms wide.
"Do you think Sunny wants anyone for a bunk mate either? We both know there's only one bot qualified for that." There was no need for Jazz to say who. "If I thought I could get away with givin' Sunstreaker his space, you know I would, but not even Prime gets that privilege this time. Who were we supposed to pick, man? You know he wouldn't last one day with practically anybody on this shuttle."
I raised an optic ridge and folded my arms again wondering what made Jazz think I was one of those exceptions. "What about you?" I asked narrowing my optics. "You're someone he calls a friend, right?"
Jazz remained silent for a longer than I cared for period of time. "If by friend you mean someone he's willing to tolerate for extended periods of time…"
"I mean friend in whatever way someone like Sunstreaker defines it and if you don't qualify, I don't know who does!"
"You qualify too then," Jazz said quickly. "We all have to make some sacrifices here. I got stuck with Cliffjumper if it's any - "
"I'll trade you, you coward!" I leaned in until Jazz was up against to viewport window with nowhere to hide. He held up his hands again in protest.
"Easy, Ratch, don't tune me out yet." Jazz lowered his hands and sighed. "I'd do it man, but the truth is, you're still Sunny's best match. He trusts you, both twins do. That's not an easy thing to earn from bots like them. They trust you every time they enter that repair bay."
I opened my mouth to retort, but paused. I was a medic. If those two twin terrors wanted to be repaired, they had to trust me and my staff. And considering how often they needed repaired…well it was that simple, wasn't it? I wasn't sure if Jazz was taking advantage of my natural compassion, but I didn't have a snappy answer that time and backed off the Porsche. My expression remained sour, but Jazz unsubspaced a list of the crew with his notes.
"Look at that and tell me you're not the best choice out of those names."
I looked it over with a grumble as Jazz relaxed again, folding his arms behind his head and leaning back. I handed the list back to him with a grunt a few moments later.
"We cool now?"
"If I end up attacked by a Lambo - "
"I know man, we trade I promise!"
"No, I promise you that not only will I then have a room to myself but also an overabundance of spare Lamborghini and Porsche parts. Capiche?"
There are times I'm told, I put the fear of Primus into other bots and I did my best to recapture that now. Had Jazz been human, I hoped he might have blanched a whiter shade than his paint already was. Instead, he smiled a shaky grimace that at least let him know I meant business, until he realized he'd gotten what he wanted and that smile spread into a confident coolness accented by that visor that hid any worry from his faceplate and suggested nothing could go wrong. He gave me a thumbs up.
"May I? I think they're startin' to miss us," he then jerked that same thumb motioning if I'd unblock his path. I moved out of his way. He turned to me just before disembarking and said, "Everything'll be cool, Ratch. If anyone can do it, you can. Look at this as an opportunity to find out what makes Sunstreaker tick without havin' to be up to your elbows in wires and circuits." Then he exited the shuttle.
I'm not sure how much of my swearing he heard on the way out.
A young guide showed me to the repair bay. I didn't need one to remember my way to my own former place of residence. I guess the bots here figure that after four million years, I'd forgotten my way. But unlike them, we of the Ark spent those four million years in stasis lock. In my mind, it's been sixteen Earth years since I've last been home, not to mention a few short visits in between. However, my guide, a femme by the name of Minerva, was eager to make a good first impression on her new superior so I didn't say a word.
Given the brief report from a bot named Cerebros (one of the ranking officers left in charge by Magnus while he's been gone) upon our disembarking and the crowded state of Iacon itself, I expected to be pulling a long first night in the repair bay. (That could be one way to avoid my roommate by working opposite day and night shifts.) Minerva grabbed my hand with a beaming smile after we recoded the door to my voiceprint and pulled me inside the infirmary that stood stark empty of patients.
She told me talking at a speed Bluestreak would find normal that my new staff worked overtime making repairs to present me with this wonderful surprise upon my arrival. I couldn't help but smile, say thanks, and to pass it onto the others. The empty repair bay was indeed a comforting sight, especially after a long trip to Cybertron. I hadn't been looking forward to stepping foot inside. Part of me had been dreading the worst. I also knew it wasn't going to stay this way for long so I'd better enjoy it while I could. But at least I knew I had a good staff backing me up.
"So where's the party?" I asked Minerva, which is my own first impulse after clearing out the repair bay. Sometimes I crash, but more than often those that know me will attest to my preference to celebrate.
I guess my reputation hadn't preceded me in that department because Minerva said, "Most of the medical staff is recharging for the night, but if you want to meet them now instead of waiting till tomorrow -"
I shook my head and waved her off, holding back a sigh. I can't blame a hardworking staff for needing their recharge. Still, I'm going to have to teach this staff a thing or two about rewarding a job well done. Aren't these bots even younger than I am? Pulling an all-nighter with the high grade on top of an all-nighter of work never stopped me at that age, let alone now. Tempting as Minerva's offer is to wake them, I let it pass.
There's a lounge at the far end of the repair bay. The other end opens onto my office, just like I remember, and off the office is the door that leads to the CMO's private quarters. Not so private anymore with a new roommate I reminded myself. Might as well get this over with, I thought as Minerva talked again telling me what I already knew as she led me through my office showing me to my quarters. Maybe I could just set up a bunk in my office if worse comes to worse, provided there was even room inside it. My office was, in human terms, "a postage stamp."
The door swished open and sure enough, Sunstreaker was already there, having used the hall entrance to "our" quarters, and unpacking. His optics narrowed at the sight of Minerva.
"Oh," Minerva said. "I didn't know you had company. Is this your assistant?"
From the way she eyed the golden robot I got the feeling she hoped he was and that she'd be working side by side with the handsome mech in medical, but Sunstreaker positively scowled at the idea of being mistaken for my nurse and shot me a look fit to kill. It was a look Minerva missed as both bots looked to me expecting introductions.
"No. Sunstreaker, this is Minerva, one of my new staff. Minerva, this is Sunstreaker, frontline warrior and combat instructor for the Autobot army."
Sunstreaker struck a pose, crossing his arms and smiling at the femme now that she knew his true rank and function. Slagin' great! The last thing I needed was those two flirting with each other! But Sunstreaker's smile captured none of Sideswipe's charm. Minerva snapped to attention thinking Sunstreaker was inspecting her combat readiness on the spot and sizing her up.
"Sir!" she said and saluted, much like she did upon her introduction to me by Cerebros.
Sunstreaker's face went blank and his optics widened for an astrosecond at being addressed as such. Then his wolfish smile grew again, deciding he liked the sound of the word. He nodded his approval, continuing to look her over though with what intent I wasn't sure. A predatory look like that could mean he really was sizing her up her combat capabilities as much as it could he fancied her and I really didn't care to know which.
"Get some recharge, Minerva," I said in an attempt to break it up. "You and the staff did a good job today. I look forward to meeting them tomorrow."
"Yes, sir." Minerva turned her attention back to me with a smile and headed off back through my office with a bounce in her step.
Sunstreaker stared after her until the door closed, a smile still on his face.
"I don't think she's your type," I said.
Sunstreaker's smile faded and he fixed me with another hard stare and went back to his unpacking. The yellow Lambo had taken a bunk close to the wall for which I was grateful. (It looked like an extra berth someone had moved in from the repair bay in anticipation of "doubling up.") Meanwhile, my old bunk stood right where I remembered. Perhaps my roommate was being accommodating in his own way or perhaps he just wanted to keep as far away from the repair bay and what I and it represented as much as possible and that proved to be only as far as the other side of the room. In contrast to my office, my quarters were slightly larger than average which helped. Ah, the perks of rank. The room felt both bigger and smaller with a roommate added. Perhaps there was just enough room to stay out of each other's way, but these were the CMO's quarters and therefore mine. I felt the need to lay a few ground rules up front.
"I'm sure you don't like this any slagin' more than I do, but we're stuck with each other, so if we're going to survive this, I am making a few things crystal clear right now," I addressed the room at large certain Sunstreaker would hear me whether he chose to or not. "One," I pointed to the door at the far end of the room. "That is my office. You are not to set foot in it – ever, or the repair bay beyond it while I am working unless you yourself are injured. Two, you are not to take anything from my office or my repair bay that you have not specifically asked permission for." I knew that was a warning better suited to the other twin with his pranks, but one could never be too sure. "You will not bother me in any way, shape, or form while I am working and that includes any distracting hobbies. If you want to play video games or watch movies, that is what the lounge if for. Finally, you will not be painting the walls of this room or my office or the repair bay."
At that, Sunstreaker's head finally snapped up to face me. A bit odd, I thought, that that of all things should get his attention.
"These are technically the CMO's quarters and I like my walls the boring gray they are. Find your creative outlet for such elsewhere on this base. Is all I've said clear? If so, we have an understanding for getting by."
Sunstreaker continued to stare me down with the same murderous stare he had since getting off the shuttle. It was already getting old and wasn't going to work on me.
"Is there anything you need from me that you'd like to add to the list?" I said slowly, half regretting anything it might prompt him to demand of me, but realizing it was only fair to ask.
Sunstreaker's optics narrowed as if testing me on that statement. Then he looked away in consideration, then back at me, then away again as if unsure what to ask for. That's when I realized he'd never had to explain it to a roommate before. Sideswipe had always just known what Sunstreaker needed. Finally, he settled for motioning to his stuff, pointing to me, and drawing a kill gesture across his neck. I wondered about the silent treatment and how he hadn't said a word to anyone since boarding the shuttle (at least no one to my knowledge) and what he hoped to achieve with that. But I saw his optics searching me for confirmation.
"Fair enough," I said. "I don't touch your stuff, you don't touch mine. I don't bother you, you don't bother me?"
I didn't feel like playing charades with Sunstreaker, but he nodded firmly before turning back to the rest of his unpacking, ignoring me again. I knew we'd achieved a tentative peace for now. Who could say how long it would last though?
--
Something felt…wrong. Something was…missing. He reached out with his spark and felt…nothing? He'd felt it as a dull ache for a while, but now he sent out his message expecting a reply, but…nothing! How could there be nothing in reply?
Sideswipe? Nothing. SIDESWIPE? Nothing!
--
"Sideswipe!"
I'm not sure which woke me, the screaming or the thrashing. But given that this was the first thing I'd heard my roommate say since we'd left Earth, it was probably the screaming. We bots don't normally dream, but we can when stressed or emotionally over stimulated, or in Sunstreaker's case - have nightmares. No need to wonder what about.
"SIDESWIPE!"
I quickly prepared a sedative, but wouldn't need it if I could wake him. Sunstreaker kicked and felt for something above him that seemed just out of reach. His voice tinged with panic. I moved cautiously to his berth.
--
Sideswipe's bunk! Where was it? He couldn't feel it. He couldn't feel his brother's spark! WHY? Where was his brother? What was -
"Sunstreaker. Sunstreaker."
A hand on his shoulder, familiar with its gentle touch. "Sideswipe?" He reached out to touch it back, his hand closing around his brother's. He reached out again with his spark for the pulse of his twin. Searching…searching…still nothing! He felt nothing from the presence behind him save the fingers resting on his shoulder! It wasn't his brother!
--
I placed my hand on Sunstreaker's shoulder, calling his name, hypo-syringe at the ready. But Sunstreaker surprisingly calmed under my touch and reached his hand up to mine. I figured out why as he murmured his brother's name. Not quite, I thought, but willing to let him think me so if it helped. I marveled at the comforting effect one twin thinking the other nearby had, even though I'd seen it many times over the vorns as their doctor. I smiled as the golden hand tightened around mine strong and…vice like. Crushing. Painful!
In one swift move, Sunstreaker awoke, leapt off his berth, and slammed me into the wall, his forearm crushing into my throat, accusing blue optics manic and inches away as he demanded to know –
"WHERE"S MY BROTHER? WHERE IS SIDESWIPE!?"
"On...Earth," I choked out.
"WHY! Where is – where am -"
"You're…on…Cybertron."
Sunstreaker shook his head, confused. I still held my syringe in my other hand and tried to maneuver it to subdue him. The glint of it caught his attention and he pounced on it, stripping it from my hand. The hypo went skittering across the floor.
"What have you done with my brother!?"
Sunstreaker slammed me into the wall again then released me, running for my office door. I scooped up the syringe again and followed. Sunstreaker stood in the empty repair bay as if expecting to find Sideswipe in some state of trouble, even more confused.
"Nothing! Nothing's happened to Sideswipe. He's safe! Sideswipe is perfectly safe on Earth. He's not here. You're on Cybertron. Remember."
The yellow twin had his back to me. I wondered if he would stay that way long enough to give me one more chance with the hypo-syringe.
--
Sideswipe wasn't in the infirmary! Where was he? Earth? So far away! Was it true? Earth! It was true! Slagit! But why couldn't he feel him? His spark! Why? Was it because he was so far away? Cybertron. Slagit! He couldn't feel his brother here!
--
"I KNOW!" Sideswipe faced me with a snarl before I could make my move. "I know, he's not here and where I am." He lowered his voice and eyed my syringe with contempt. "I'm fine. You don't need that slagin' thing anymore, doc."
I looked him over with a quizzical optic. Sunstreaker looked anything but fine, though he no longer appeared to be in a dream state. I knew any chance to sedate him was gone now. He wasn't going to let me get near him again tonight and, as I tested the cables in my hand flexing them, I realized that I didn't want him near me either. Sunstreaker was indeed awake and back to his wary self again. My hand felt a little bruised, but otherwise alright. Sunstreaker watched me and motioned to his own throat as if asking how mine was. A bit tender, but no real damage. I gave him a nod which he approvingly returned. I curiously realized it was his way of apologizing for the unintentional attack as I lowered my hypo.
"I need some air," Sunstreaker muttered excusing himself with no further explanation and I saw no reason to follow. Not this time anyway.
I didn't realize at first that the challenge of rooming with Sunstreaker wasn't sharing a living space with one twin, it was also sharing with the ghost of the other one. I hadn't planned on quarters for three.
--
Dear Pollux,
Where are you!? I searched for you all night at the Stellar Galleries and I couldn't find you! The stars of home don't form the same shapes as seen from Earth. I can't have lost you so soon!
Send me a reply,
Castor
--
Dear Castor,
I'm still here! I'm the immortal one remember ;-) …immortally bored. You're going to have all the fun pounding Cons. I just know it! :-(
Don't hurt the doc-bot! You're not immortal. I need him to keep you in one piece. He promised me!
I tried keeping your bunk warm, but I couldn't. Mine got cold. I went looking for you, but the sky was overcast. Don't do that! Tell the clouds I'm in no mood for hide and seek. And I hate recharging in the rain. And you'd hate it if I rusted, right? But I'm not recharging in that room again without you. It's too slagin' big alone. All it does is remind me you're not here anymore, Sunny. And I can feel that in my spark without another slagin' reminder.
Send clear skies and sunshine please,
Pollux
Notes: While I plan on integrating several season 4 characters into this fanfic, Minerva was definately an unplanned one, but I needed a medic and she popped to mind. So I still don't know where things might be going with her. Originally, Sunny was going to room with Jazz, but since the story was always going to include Ratchet's pov, it made more sense to stick the two of them together. Yeah, I'm sure my Sunny and Ratchet muses hate me for that one. ;p And you know things are only going to get worse before they get better. The Dr. McCoy reference last chapter was intentional. It's hard sometimes trying to keep Ratchet from not being too much like TFA Ratchet. I plan on showing Sideswipe back on Earth too (Ultra Magnus fans, be afraid, be very afraid), but Sunny has a tendancy to monopolize the spotlight in my mind. I find Sideswipe the harder to write of the two. Weird, cause I always liked Sides better growing up. BTW, found Universe Sideswipe! Wonderful toy. Hasbro has outdone themselves with the twins mould this time, better than Alternators even.
Stan Bush's "When I Dream" as I said is the theme piece for this story, especially coming into play in this chapter, but I've been listening to some twin tribute videos on youtube for inspiration. For anyone who's interested in my full Sunny/Sides playlist (or my not so successful attempt to try the kitbash leg swap on Universe Sideswipe) send me a pm. My fave songs for the twins right now though include: Leave Out All the Rest - Linkin Park (great one for Sunny), Time of Dying - Three Days Grace, and Until the End - Breaking Benjamin. I guess if my other story, The Art of Death has a theme song it's either "I Will Be There" by Stan Bush or "Gallery of Dreams" by Keith Scott (I drew a lot of inspiration for Sunny in that one from the Highlander episode "Studies in Light").
