Chapter 3 - Battle Lines
When Cas and Gail got up to Heaven, Bobby was waiting impatiently for them in his office.
"What's up, Bobby?" Cas asked their friend. "You sounded worried when you called."
"I am," Bobby acknowledged. "You told me Patricia was bad, but I had no idea how bad."
"How bad IS she, Bobby?" Gail asked him in a quiet voice. Bobby's agitation was contagious. "What's she doing?"
"She's been saying a lot of stuff I don't like," Bobby responded. "Talking about how things were better in ancient times. Saying she'll burn up those new laws we wrote and cancel all assignments to Earth."
Cas frowned. "She said things like that to me, as well."
Bobby gazed at him. "You realize she's talking about you and Gail, right?"
Cas was startled. "What? No, I just assumed we'd be grandfathered."
Gail grabbed Cas's arm. "She can't do that, can she, Cas? Prevent us from going to Earth?"
Cas put his hand on hers absently. He was thinking furiously now. "If she's God, I assure you, she can," he told his wife grimly. "I wonder if we shouldn't have a talk with her about that. Perhaps if we find out why she's entertaining such a radical stance, we can open up a dialogue."
Gail smiled. "Look at you, being all diplomatic. I'm proud of you, sweetie. That's just what a good God would do. No offense, Bobby."
Bobby was shaking his head. "OK, that's the first thing the three of us have to agree on. There'll be none of that. We're all friends here, but the fact is, we're all running for the Office. We can't be tripping all over ourselves every time we talk about the campaign. Let's just go with may the best man - or woman - win." He smiled grimly. "Just as long as it's not Patricia. Hey, I want to be able to go to Earth as much as you guys do. But I'll tell you something: you both need to start campaigning. Patricia's been talking and talking, and more and more of the Angels are starting to listen."
"How can they listen to those kinds of things?" Cas said angrily. "Do they WANT to go back to the Dark Ages? There was a reason they were called that, and I ought to know, because I was there. Religious persecution, inquisitions, torture...no happiness, or pleasure of any kind. We'd be living in a nightmare. Why would the Angels listen to talk like that?"
"They're listening because she's pretty much the only one who's doing the talking, Cas," Bobby pointed out. "That's why I called the two of you to come up here. I've been doing some informal polls, and I found that there are a lot of Angels who want to hear from you. What's your platform? What are your ideas? What's your vision for Heaven?"
Cas and Gail exchanged glances. "I don't think we've really..." Cas started to say, and Bobby nodded. "I figured as much," he said. "People want strong leadership, Cas. And you know yourself that most Angels aren't exactly self-starters, if ya know what I mean."
"He's right, Cas. We'd better start thinking about those kinds of things," Gail said.
"And the other problem is, you're never here," Bobby told the couple. "Patricia's already been making a big deal about that. Do they really want a God who's never around? I've been talking you both up, reminding people that you've both done a lot of good on Earth. If you hadn't been on Earth, Lucifer would still be out there, doing Lord only knows what. He might even still be here in Heaven, if it weren't for you two. But people have short memories, and they only trust what they can see and hear. Even if they're not drinking Patricia's dark Kool-Aid of prejudice against humans and medieval thinking, she's been poisoning their minds against the two of you, saying you care more about Earth then you do about Heaven. And if you're never here, it looks like she's right."
The couple thought about that for a minute. They couldn't refute Bobby's logic. Gail smiled. "Have you really been talking us up to the Angels? That's sweet, Bobby."
"Yeah, well, I've got my own campaign to run, so don't expect a lot of that, going forward," Bobby said gruffly. "But like I said, we have to make sure she doesn't win."
Gail looked at Cas. She didn't want to say so out loud right now, but in her opinion, her husband was Patricia's real competition. First off, he was a male, and like it or not, God had always traditionally been a male. She really doubted that the Angels were that progressive. And, number two, Castiel had been an Angel for just about forever, and she knew that length of service was important to older, longer-serving Angels. Even if they didn't think that much of Cas personally, that kind of thing would be important to them. Also, it was evident that Castiel had been God's favourite, and she was sure that fact would weigh heavily in his favour. When their Father had been about to retire, it was Cas He had wanted to hand the reins over to in the first place. Patricia would probably lean heavily on the fact that Cas had turned the job down at the time, but people were allowed to change their minds, weren't they? He's had God's seal of approval, that was the main thing. And lastly, Castiel was the hero, the Angel who had finally and decisively vanquished Lucifer. As a selling point, how could you beat that? Yes, Castiel was definitely the front-runner. Not for the first time, Gail wondered if she herself should bother to campaign at all.
"While you two are ruminating on that, I've got something to show you, Cas," Bobby said. Then he gave Gail a look.
"Really? It's ready, already?" she said delightedly.
"Hey, I don't sleep any more, and I'm not sore 24/7," Bobby said, shrugging. "So that means I can get a lot more done."
Cas looked from his wife to Bobby, and then back again. "Why do I get the feeling that you two know something I don't?" he asked them suspiciously.
"That's because we do," Gail answered pertly. "I had an idea way back in Romania about something you could do for Heaven, going forward. Once Lucifer was gone, I knew we would have a lot of free time on our hands. I didn't really think about all this election stuff, but I don't see any reason you can't do both. Anyway, I may have talked to Bobby on Angel Radio without your knowledge, and he may have set up the place we're talking about now."
"Well, you certainly have me intrigued," Cas said, raising an eyebrow.
"Follow me, then," Bobby said. He led them out of his office and down a few corridors until they came to a door marked "Angel Academy". Bobby opened the door, and the trio walked into a large room that resembled a gymnasium.
"All we have left to do is get the mats, and set up a weapons cabinet," Bobby told Gail as she nodded her approval. "This'll do very nicely," she told their friend. "Thanks, Bobby."
"Care to include me in this conversation?" Cas said dryly.
"You tell him. It was your idea," Bobby said to Gail.
She put her hand lightly on her husband's arm. "Welcome to the official Angel Training Academy," she said to him with a smile. "It occurred to both me and Bobby, and Sam and Dean agreed, that we should probably have more Angels who know how to fight. Not that we're promoting violence or anything, but we should at leat be prepared. So we've established this place. It's a school where Angels who want to learn how to fight can come and learn the proper techniques." She stretched up to kiss Cas on the cheek. "And you're going to be the teacher."
Cas looked at her, astonished. Him?
"Don't look so surprised," Gail said, amused. "Who taught all of us, in the first place? When I saw you in that weapons room in Romania, I started to get the idea then. You're so knowledgeable about that kind of stuff. Why don't we put that knowledge to good use? You can teach the younger generation how to defend themselves, and the best ways to attack, if need be. I know you're not interested in advocating violence, sweetie, and neither am I, believe me. But we can't afford to get caught with our pants down in the future, Cas, like we did with Lucifer. Don't you agree?"
He was overwhelmed. That she would think he was good enough to teach a whole host of Angels..."Wait a minute," Cas said. "What do you mean, 'younger generation'? Just what are you trying to imply?"
Gail grinned. "I just threw that in there to see if you were listening. So, what do you think, sweetie? Isn't it a great idea?"
Cas nodded slowly. "You know what? It truly is," he agreed. "Lucifer may be gone, but Gabriel has advised that Raguel is out there on the Earth somewhere, and he is up to no good. Plus, who knows what Crowley might decide to do in the future? We are no longer allies, and his domain has been revitalized now." He frowned. "If we'd had an army of Angels, Lucifer's death squads would not have been able to run rampant on the Earth. We should be more prepared, going forward." He looked at Bobby. "So, you set this up?"
"Yeah, Cas," he told his friend. "When the boys and I and Gail were out there together fighting those death squads, we had a lot of time to talk about it, and we all agreed this was a smart idea. We only disagreed on one thing: I think the Academy should be mandatory, but Gail disagrees. We finally decided that the final say should be up to you, if you decide to take the job."
Cas was thoughtful. He could see both sides of the argument. He thought he knew where Bobby was coming from. Many Angels had grown complacent, and training was not easy. It was like the military on Earth; if there was a chance that they could be called into battle, why would the Angels want to risk their lives? They had it soft now. They could just sit back and have others do it for them. But that wasn't really fair, was it? And, as was made plain in the year of the death squads, the forces of Good needed the numbers.
But, on the other hand, Cas was sure he knew what Gail's thought process was, too. It was a viewpoint he would have considered very carefully, had he been in on the ground floor of this whole idea. In a way, he could see why all of this had been done without his knowledge. His self-confidence issues would probably have led him to refuse. He was no teacher. Yes, he had shown a few Angels a few moves in the training room at the bunker, but Sam and Dean had been there, and Frank and Jody, too. He'd had lots of help. But now that this place had actually been realized, Cas could see himself here, instructing Angels how to fight. Pairing them up, going through various techniques with them. Males and females alike. Everyone would be welcome. However: "No, Bobby, I don't think it should be mandatory," Cas said soberly. "While I think I know why you suggested it, I want students, not soldiers. That's what we were in the old days, but I don't want it to BE like the old days. Making the Academy mandatory smacks too much of conscription, and I want no part of that. If ever the situation comes up where the Angels must fight, I want it to be their choice. I want them to want to fight, because it's the right thing to do. That's what Free Will is supposed to be all about. Many times in the past, I felt forced to fight, and the cause was not clear. That is probably why I have such a problem with violence now. Blindly following orders, anyone's, is a slippery slope. I hated that. Everyone should have the right to make up their own minds."
Bobby frowned. "That's all very well and good, Cas. But what if there was an imminent threat? Let's just say, hypothetically, that Lucifer was still out there. And let's say you posed the question to all your recruits: would they go down to Earth and put their lives on the line for Heaven? What if they said No, they didn't wanna? What would you do then?"
Cas's forehead wrinkled. Truthfully, the thought had never occurred to him. If you were trained properly how to fight, and a threat like Lucifer existed, how could you not want to do the right thing, when the opportunity presented itself? How could you not want to fight?
Poor Cas. Gail could see the dilemma he was having. She nudged him gently. "Why don't we just worry about that if and when the time comes?" she said. "I think the first step is just to get a class going, and then you can decide what to do with them once they're trained. Right, sweetie?" Cas nodded, and Gail smiled. "So I guess that means you're taking the job?"
Cas smiled slowly. "Was there ever any doubt?"
"Not really," she said pertly. She shrugged. "Hey, a good idea is a good idea."
Cas started walking around the room, visualizing. Depending on how many Angels signed up, he was picturing where to set up the mats, the best corner for the weapons cabinet..."I'll have to set up a curriculum," he muttered aloud. "A lesson plan. Maybe some kind of grading system. An exam, both practical and physical..."
Gail and Bobby exchanged smiles. Cas, the Professor. Wait till Dean and Sam and Frank heard about this. But Gail thought it was wonderful. She knew he'd be great.
"Oh, and you have an office in the back, here," Bobby said to Cas, bringing him out of his reverie. Bobby walked over to the other side of the gym room and pushed open another door. "I visualized what my gym teacher's office looked like, when we set this up."
"It'll be perfect," Cas enthused. "I can do whatever paperwork I need to do in here, and then we'll do the practical lessons out there."
He put his arm around Gail. "Thank you for thinking of this, my love. I admit I was a little concerned about what my role would be, going forward. Even if I don't win the election - " he looked apologetically at Bobby, but Bobby gave him a momentary glare. Oh. Right. "If I don't win the election, I had no idea how I was going to be of service to Heaven," Cas continued. "This is perfect. Thank you. Both of you."
Then Cas looked down at his wife. "But while I'm doing this, what will you be doing? Unless you want to teach here with me, of course."
"Noooo," she said, shaking her head. "I'm retiring from training. I was always better with my brain, and my mouth." She pointed a finger at both men. "No jokes allowed. Anyway, I'm going back to the board. We're going to have to determine how a lot of the laws we wrote are going to be implemented. I don't care what Patricia thinks she's going to do, those laws are officially in the books. So we've got a bunch of things like the Suicide Committee we still have to iron out. Once the election is over and we have a sitting God again, there's going to be a flood of people coming in from the Garden. We're going to have to figure out how to adjudicate the suicides, once they're sorted." Then she frowned. "That came out really harsh. But you guys know what I mean. Anyway, I want to reconvene the board to see if anybody's got any new ideas, as well. I'm going to proceed on the premise that one of you is going to be God. Just like we want to prepare the Angels by teaching them how to fight, I want to have the new statutes ready to roll for God's seal when that happens."
"What about you?" Bobby asked her. "You didn't say anything about you being God."
She made a face. "Let's be realistic. I really don't think that's going to happen."
"Don't be so sure," Bobby contradicted her gently. "When I was doing my polling, I discovered that there's also a faction of younger, more progressive Angels who seem really open to the idea of having a female God."
Gail's eyebrows rose. "Really?"
"You might be surprised," Bobby replied. "So it's up to you, but I wouldn't remove your hat from the ring yet, if I were you."
"Huh," Gail remarked, bemused. Who would have thought it? Maybe Heaven wasn't so backward, after all. But if that was the case, maybe she'd better not withdraw her name just yet. If there were a fair amount of Angels who might want a female, Gail had better start campaigning, to make sure that their votes didn't go to Patricia.
"Anyway, Laurel made up a bunch of flyers advertising the new Academy," Bobby told the couple now. "Maybe the two of you want to distribute those, and then set up your campaign teams."
"We can't thank you enough, Bobby," Gail said, smiling warmly at their friend.
"Yeah, yeah," he said grumpily, but his beard was twitching. "But from now on, we're rivals, so don't go looking for any campaign secrets from me. What you tell each other is your own business."
"We don't have any secrets from each other," Cas said, drawing Gail to him and kissing her on the lips.
"Politics might make strange bedfellows, but I'm sure we'll have plenty of other things to talk about when we find ourselves in that situation," Gail added. She touched Cas's face, and he put his hand over hers, smiling.
Bobby rolled his eyes. "And there's my cue to leave. I'll see you lovebirds later." He winked out of Cas's office.
"I'm glad we can still make him uncomfortable, after all these years," Gail quipped.
Cas leaned against his desk, pulling her to him. "He called us lovebirds, so I guess we should live up to the name," he said, kissing her on the mouth.
Gail smiled. "You know, I can picture you sitting at this desk, drawing up lesson plans. Maybe we'll get you a pair of glasses that you can wear while you're doing it."
Cas's forehead wrinkled. "Now, why on earth would I need glasses? I'm an Angel. My vision cannot deteriorate."
"Because it would be sexy," Gail said, nuzzling his cheek.
"It would?" Cas said, puzzled. "Why?"
She gave him a half-shrug. "I don't know, really. I guess it would be a Clark Kent/Superman kind of thing. You know, you'd be in here in a shirt and tie, wearing glasses, being all intelligent, and then you'd get out there and get physical. Take the glasses and tie off, and show your students how to fight. Maybe you'd get all sweaty, so you'd have to take your shirt off, and...what were we talking about?" She fanned herself with her hand, smiling.
Cas's eyebrow raised. "I'm not really sure. You were going off on some kind of tangent."
Gail leaned her body into his, kissing him on the lips. "I might have to sign up for some classes. Then you could give me some private lessons, after the school was closed for the day. Maybe I wouldn't do so well on my exam, because I was so distracted by my huge crush on the teacher. You would sit me down in here and admonish me for my poor grades, and I would tell you I needed more one-on-one time out there. So then we would go out to the gym, and you would take your shirt off and pin me down on the mat. I'd be laying there, helpless, underneath you. I wonder what we'd do then," she said teasingly.
"You would tell me to let you up, and we would try again," Cas replied calmly.
"Wrong answer," Gail said softly.
Cas smiled. He hadn't been oblivious to what she'd been talking about, of course. He had just wanted to tease her a bit in return. "I want to change my answer, then," he told his wife. He tightened his arms around her and kissed her on the mouth once more. "Is that a better answer?"
"Now we're getting somewhere," she said, smiling. "Care to go for extra credit?"
This time when he kissed her, his tongue pried her lips open, and the two Angels sighed contentedly. Cas pressed her body to his as they continued to kiss. He was thinking now about what she'd said, about him pinning her to the mat, picturing himself kissing her like this, then slowly starting to remove her clothing, and...
"Knock, knock," Riley said. The couple looked up, startled. The young Angel stood in the doorway of the office, looking awkward. "I hope I'm not interrupting anything," he went on. "I mean, I can tell that I was interrupting something, but I'd heard you guys were back, and I was really anxious to talk to you. I haven't seen you since the funeral, and then, everybody was so sad. But then I heard you came here with Gabriel, and I wondered what that was all about, but then before I could find you, you were gone. But then, Bobby was back, and he told us that you brought Dean back to life! I wanted to tell you how happy I was about that, and how excited I am about the Academy, and to offer you my services. Whatever you need, Sir. I mean, Castiel. I mean, Cas."
"Oh my God, Riley, take a breath," Gail said, smirking. She went to move away from her husband. He spun her around so that she could look at Riley, but he kept her standing in front of him. "Maybe you'd better just stay there for a moment, until I...collect myself," Cas said into her ear, and she smiled mischievously. Oh. Right. Darn Riley, and his timing. But it was just as well. She'd been about one more step away from suggesting that they pop back to their house on Earth and act out the scenario she'd been describing here, in the privacy of their own bedroom. And, not that that wouldn't have been glorious, but they had just gotten here. Bobby had just been upbraiding them about not spending any time in Heaven, so she supposed they should really hang around for a bit. Maybe she would talk to Cas about getting an apartment here in Heaven, in addition to their place on Earth. That way, if they were here for an extended period of time, at least they would have someplace private to go.
"I'm sorry. Do you want me to leave?" Riley asked the couple.
Yes, Cas thought. "No, Riley, it's all right," he told the young Angel. "Thank you for your kind words. And yes, there are a couple of things you can help me with." He sighed, gently pushing Gail away. "We're supposed to go and see Laurel about some flyers she's got, advertising the Academy. Can you help us distribute those? It'll go faster that way."
"Oh. Sure." Riley's face fell. He'd been hoping for something less menial, but if that's what Castiel needed him to do, he would gladly do it.
"And after that's done, you and I can talk about your new role here at the Academy, as my Teacher's Assistant," Cas continued. Riley's face broke into a grin. "Really? You mean it?" he asked Cas excitedly.
"I truly do," Cas responded. "I'll need help setting everything up and making up lesson plans. You can advise me on what you found most helpful when I was training YOU, and what else you'd like them to learn."
"I'd love to do that!" Riley enthused. "Anything you need, Cas, just ask. I'm your man."
"Maybe you can help with Cas's campaign, too," Gail suggested. "We should probably get going on that as soon as possible."
"I've got a ton of good ideas for that," Riley said eagerly. "If you'll let me, I'll put together a staff for you. We'll remind the Angels about how much of a hero you are, Cas. How you eliminated Lucifer, at great personal risk, to make sure that we were all safe. How you wouldn't hesitate to draw your blade and go into battle - "
"Maybe we want to de-emphasize the violence aspect a little, but I like the approach," Gail said to the young Angel. "By all means, let's remind everyone of what a hero Cas is."
But Riley was frowning slightly now. "Aren't you running, too?" he asked her.
Gail smiled. "Yes, but the two aren't mutually exclusive. Anything you can do to promote my husband's candidacy is all right with me."
"My wife is very understanding," Cas said with a gentle smile. He felt safe enough to come out from behind her now, but he took her by the hand, giving it a brief squeeze of appreciation. "But I have to warn you, Riley, any time that anybody asks me about that day, I will be sure to remind them that my darling Gail was there as well. And her role was just as pivotal, and she was just as heroic as I was."
Gail squeezed his hand in return. "Thank you, sweetie. Now, let's go get those flyers." She looked at the two other Angels. "You know what? I have the feeling that this is going to be a lot of fun."
"Cas! Gail! It's good to see you," Laurel told the couple. She was standing at the reception desk outside the High Office.
As they drew nearer, though, Gail was alarmed to see that Laurel was standing because she had a box on the surface of the desk, and she was packing things into it. Laurel saw Gail's expression, and she smiled.
"Don't worry, I'm only temporarily relocating," Laurel told them. "Or at least, I hope so. Actually, I'm glad you're both here together, because I wanted to tell you in person: I'm going to work for Bobby, on his campaign. I hope that won't upset either of you. I consider you both my friends, and I hope you feel the same way. But he asked me if I would help him out, and I couldn't say no. He's the best boss I've ever had, if that's not blasphemy. He's like a father to me, actually. No pun intended." She smiled. "So I'll be moving over to be his assistant until the election's over, and then...well, we'll see."
"I think I can speak for both of us when I say that it doesn't upset us at all," Cas told Laurel. "We know you and Bobby have a special relationship. We had a talk with him earlier, and we all decided that our campaigns and our friendship are two separate things. We're not going to let one affect the other."
"I'm very glad to hear that," Laurel said. Then she lowered her voice. "I don't think Patricia feels the same way, though. I'm afraid she may be taking it personally."
"We can't worry about that, and nor should you," Cas said to her. "Everyone should feel free to side with whomever they wish."
Riley was standing behind Cas, and when he heard that, he put his hand to his head. Oh, man. He and Castiel were going to have to have a chat about that, if Riley could work up the nerve to bring it up. If you were running for office, you shouldn't go around saying things like that. He knew Cas was just being magnanimous, which was one of the many qualities that made him a great leader. But he shouldn't be so humble. He should be telling people why they should vote for him. That was certainly what Patricia had been doing. Bobby, too.
"Hey, Laurel, do you think you could - " Chuck said as he entered the reception area. He stopped short. "Oh, hi, you guys. I didn't know you were here."
"And you call yourself a Prophet," Gail quipped, and Chuck gave her a hug, and a smile. "I just came here to ask you, Laurel, if you think you can run off some more copies of the election rules, so we can post them in the hallways," Chuck said.
"Sure, Chuck," Laurel said affably. "Oh, that reminds me: I've got the flyers for the Academy here. Bobby said you'd be dropping by to get them." She opened up a cabinet behind the reception desk. There were stacks of flyers there. "Can one of you men take them out for me?" Laurel asked. "The piles are pretty heavy. Bobby said to make a lot, because let's face it, we have a lot of corridors, here."
Cas moved forward automatically, but Chuck rushed past him. As Gail watched, bemused, Chuck smiled at Laurel. "I got this," he told her.
As Chuck struggled to lift the piles of flyers, Gail's lips were twitching furiously. It didn't take a genius to figure out what was going on here. Chuck had a crush.
Laurel put her hand on Chuck's arm. "Thanks for the help, Chuck," she said warmly. Then she squeezed his bicep. "Look at that; your arm is shaking," Laurel remarked. "Maybe you'd better sign up for Cas's class."
Gail was biting the insides of her cheeks now. It would be pretty mean to laugh at this point, but it was hard not to. Chuck looked down at his arm. His muscles were indeed quivering. Maybe he'd been spending too much time in the library.
But then, a surprising thing happened: Laurel gave Chuck a kiss on the cheek. "I'm only teasing you, Chuck, you know that, right?" Laurel said.
Chuck's face lit up. "Yeah, I know that, Laurel. Good one," he said.
"Now, give two big stacks of those to Cas and Riley, and a small stack to Gail, and then you can take that box over to Bobby's office for me," Laurel instructed Chuck. She looked at Cas and Gail. "I'm sure I'll be seeing you very soon." Then she walked away.
Gail watched Chuck watching Laurel leave, and he was smiling. "Ma'am, yes, Ma'am," he said softly.
A moment passed, and still, Chuck was staring off into space. "Ummm...Chuck? Flyers?" Gail teased him. "Yoo hoo! Heaven to Chuck!"
The Prophet snapped out of it. "Oh, right. Sorry," he said, moving over to the stacks of flyers. He gave a pile each to Cas and Riley, then brought Gail a smaller stack. "So, Laurel, eh?" Gail said to him slyly.
Chuck grinned sheepishly. "I like her, Gail. But do you want to hear something really weird? I think she likes me, too."
"I don't think that's weird at all, Chuck. I think it's wonderful," Gail said.
"She's a little tough on me, though," Chuck added.
"Well then, that makes me like her even more," Gail said, nodding her approval. She smiled at her friend. "We're going to go put these up. See you soon, Chuck."
The three of them started popping in and out, attaching the flyers to walls and bulletin boards around Heaven, then winking back to get some more.
Gail had distributed two stacks already, and she and Cas popped back to Laurel's old desk at the same moment. They smiled at each other.
"Must we do everything together?" Gail teased him.
"I sincerely hope so," Cas remarked, his lips twitching. He reached for her, but she was distracted. "I've been thinking," Gail told him. "Everybody else has an office, and at least one person working on their campaign, but I have neither."
Cas thought about that for a moment. "Actually, I have an idea about one of those things," he told her. A beat, then: "I just let Riley know where we were going," Cas continued. "Come with me." He grabbed Gail's hand, and led her through the reception area around the corner.
"This is the Executive Wing," Cas told his wife. "I think one of these should do very nicely. In fact..." He led her to a large corner office. "This one was Metatron's. I think it would make a statement if you took it over, now."
Gail looked at her husband. Interesting. She supposed he was right. She opened the door and they walked in. The office was quite large, with the standard desk, tow chairs in front, bookshelves, and a credenza. But it also had what looked like an informal meeting area on the other side of the room, with a couple of sofas and tables. Surprising, really. Metatron had hardly been the "meet and greet" type, she thought to herself. But whoever had designed this office obviously had an idea of what an executive's office was supposed to look like. If this place had been on Earth, it would have big windows, and a killer view.
"What, no wet bar?" she quipped.
Cas smiled. "It is pretty large, isn't it? But, I think it befits an Angel of your stature."
Gail approached her husband, kissing him on the cheek. "My stature? The only stature I have is when I stand beside you," she told him softly. "But, I think I actually will take it." Then she frowned. "I wonder if it would be too controversial if I put up a plaque of some sort here, commemorating him. He did save my life on that battleground, Cas. And he told us about the modification. That was a huge deal for us. He could have just let us go on thinking that all of those terrible things had happened, but he didn't. In the end, he did the right thing."
They were both silent for a minute as they contemplated that. It was true, and its significance to the two of them could not be overstated. No one else really knew how that felt for them, because none of the people they knew had been there with them in that horrifying headspace. Gail was right. Metatron could have just left things status quo. Thank God he had told them before they'd all gone to Madagascar; otherwise, they would never have known the truth.
"I don't care if it is controversial," Cas said, kissing her tenderly on the lips. "If that's what you think the right thing is to do, then that's what should be done."
"Maybe we should make THAT a laminated card, too," she quipped. "We could do one a month. Make a calendar out of them."
"You know that whatever you want is what shall be done," Cas said, his lips curling into a smile.
Gail moved her body closer to his. "Really? Well, on that note, remember the discussion we were having in your office earlier?"
"Oh yes, the discussion about your needing some extra training," Cas replied. He wound his arms around her. "I think that will have to be arranged, as soon as possible."
"Knock, knock," Riley said.
Gail looked at her husband, sighing. "I think the very first order of business we should attend to is getting locks for our office doors," she told him pointedly.
"I agree," Cas said lightly. He kissed her on the forehead and then moved away from her, to avoid a repeat of what had happened earlier when Riley had barged in on them.
"Sorry," Riley said sheepishly. And he sort of was, but he sort of wasn't, either. Geez, if he had to wait until those two stopped kissing to get a word in with Castiel, the election would be over. "I took the liberty of getting a few Angels together who want to work on your campaign, Cas," Riley told his mentor. "I set up a campaign office, and I thought maybe you could come. They're all very excited about meeting you. But if there's anybody you don't like, you just have to let me know and I'll get rid of them. I think you'll like everyone, though. We all share the same core values."
And what core values were those, exactly? Gail thought, bemused. But she had to hand it to Riley; he was very on top of things. Too bad she didn't have anyone like that working for her.
"Oh, and I've got some campaign posters ready to go, too," Riley said. "Tell me what you think." He held one up. It was a depiction of Cas with a huge halo around his head, in a robe, holding a sword in one hand and a Bible in the other. One of his sandaled feet was on Lucifer's neck, and the Devil was holding his hands up in supplication.
"Wow," Gail said. She came forward to look at the poster more closely. "I love it. Maybe make the eyes a bit bluer, and put some big wings on him, at the back. But otherwise, I think you've got a winner. Very Biblical. Very Godlike."
"Exactly," Riley said proudly. "I thought so, too. I got the idea of the robes from Africa, and the sandals from Jesus, of course. I was going to have him stabbing Lucifer to death, but I remembered what you said about de-emphasizing the violence. The implication is clearly there though, don't you think? What do YOU think, Cas?"
Cas was flabbergasted. He had no idea what to say. Riley was making him look like..."That's not me," he mumbled.
"Sure it is," Riley said heartily. "Of course it is. This depicts you as the hero you are, Cas. This is what people need to see." He looked at Gail. "Good points about the eye colour and the wings, though. I'll get the design team on that, right away."
Gail was smiling. Whatever had happened to the nervous, awkward young Angel who had knocked on the bunker door just a couple of short years ago? He was turning hero worship into an art form. But, even though the posters were a bit cheesy, the imagery was powerful. She couldn't deny it. These were bound to have an effect on many of the Angels, and with her suggested changes, they'd be even better. Too bad they couldn't arrange to make some more, with Cas shirtless this time. What had gotten into her lately? She'd known the Academy was going to be a good idea, but if she'd been aware that it was going to have this kind of an additional benefit, she would have suggested it ages ago. She'd better cool herself down, though. This was neither the time nor the place. At least, not until they got rid of Riley and put a lock on that door, she thought, grinning inwardly. But she was going to have to make a mental note to herself to liberate one of those posters and smuggle it down to the bunker. Sam and Dean and Frank would never forgive her if she didn't. Lord only knew what they would do to it, though. She indulged herself for a minute, thinking of different, highly inappropriate things the Winchesters could photoshop Cas holding instead. Yikes.
"Well, it looks like you guys have an appointment to keep, then," Gail said. She gave Cas a kiss on the cheek. "I'll see you later. I'm going to hang up a few more flyers and think about what to do about my own campaign. Here, Riley, give me those posters. I'll start putting them up, too. The sooner, the better."
Cas was looking at his wife with sympathy now. His poor, wonderful darling. She was doing all of this for him, but what about her own campaign? Who was helping her?
Gail saw the look in his eyes, and she touched his face. "Don't worry about me, I'll be fine," she told him. "I'll think of something. Now, get going. I'll meet you back here later, once you're done. As soon as I finish putting up the stuff, I'm going to come back here and start putting some ideas down on paper. That always helps me think better. And considering that this is Metatron's old office, the written word should be very welcome here."
"This is Metatron's old office?" Riley said, shocked. When Gail nodded, he said, "Boy, I don't know if I'd go around advertising that, if I were you."
"Why?" she asked him sharply. "What difference does it make?"
"I don't know. It just does," Riley said in a more subdued voice. "Perception is key."
Gail rolled her eyes. What did that even mean? Riley was going to have one hell of a future in Marketing, after this election was over. "Perception is key", indeed. She took a deep breath, then let it out.
"I'll see you later, then," she said to Cas. Then she grabbed the posters from Riley and winked out.
Gail was just putting up the last of the posters in yet another inexplicable coffee room when she heard a voice behind her: "Gail? Is that you?"
She turned around to see a female Angel standing in the doorway. She was blonde, taller in stature than Gail, and she was wearing a pretty sundress which was splashed with colour, with a beige cardigan on top.
"Hi," Gail said. Was she supposed to know this woman? But the strange thing was, she did look familiar, for some reason.
"You haven't changed a bit, but I can see from your expression that you don't remember me," the Angel said. "Which I guess is only fair. The last time you and I saw each other, we were both ten years old, and I didn't have my boobs yet." She looked around furtively, then took off the sweater and stuck out her chest. "Didn't they turn out great?"
Gail stared at her, and then she burst out laughing. "Liz?" she asked the woman.
"So you DO remember!" Liz exclaimed, pleased.
"Of course I do. It just took me a minute," Gail said. She moved forward. "And yes, for the record, they did turn out great," she added, her lips twitching.
The two women hugged, and Gail said, "Not that I'm not glad to see you, but what are you doing here? You're way too young to be here."
Liz made a face. "I know, right? And I could say the same thing about you."
Gail nodded. "And you would be right. Hey, are you doing anything right now?"
"Nothing more important than talking to you," Liz replied brightly.
"Good. Let's go to my office, then," Gail said. She looked at her childhood friend, smiling. "It's so good to see you."
"Where's your office?" Liz asked, and Gail reached out and took her friend's hand, winking them both back to her new office.
"Wow," Liz remarked, looking around. "Nice." She walked over to one of the couches and plopped down. Gail came over and sat beside her. "So, what happened?" Gail asked Liz. "Why are you here?"
Liz sighed. "Leukemia," she said. "I was on the waiting list for a bone marrow transplant, but...well, you know. How about you?"
Gail shook her head slowly. "My story's a lot more complicated," she remarked. "I'm so sorry, Liz."
Liz shrugged. "It's OK. I admit, it really sucked, at first. There was so much more I wanted to do with my life."
Gail smiled. "I know. You were going to join Greenpeace, plant a bunch of trees, start a charitable foundation, teach disabled kids, et cetera, et cetera. Boy, you must have been at the head of the line in the Garden. I think maybe YOU should be running for God, or at least for Sainthood. Tell me you got to do at least some of those things."
"I got my teacher's certificate, and I was working at a school for mentally challenged kids when I was diagnosed," Liz told her friend. "My husband and I moved to a small town in upstate New York. You wouldn't believe this place. It was the least likely place you'd expect me to be living. Small town, redneck guys, hanging around in the bar where my husband worked. I'd go in there to see him at night sometimes, and those guys were unbelievable, Gail. I wish you'd been there. They made me laugh so hard. They'd have a few beers, and then say they were going to get into their pickup trucks and 'go get those Ay-rabs'. Can you imagine?"
"Oh, my God! That's terrible!" Gail exclaimed, appalled.
"That's what I thought, too!" Liz said, but she was smiling, and she giggled loudly. "So I would sit there with my glass of wine and ask them how they could say stuff like that. Didn't they care about their fellow man? And, you know what they would say to me? 'Hell, no! Let's nuke 'em all!'" She giggled again.
Gail could just picture it. Anyone else might be disconcerted by the fact that her friend was saying such terrible things, yet laughing about it, but not Gail. She and Liz had first met in grade school, and they had become fast friends. Gail had been a shy, bookish loner, and Liz had come from a poor immigrant family. The other kids had made fun of Liz because the clothes she had to wear were ill-fitting and out of style, and because her parents didn't speak English. Gail, they had left alone, for the most part. There had been nothing particularly remarkable about her to make fun of, so they hadn't bothered with her. But it had made Gail angry to see the way they'd taunted Liz, so she had made it a point to seek out the girl and talk to her. Soon, they became best friends. Liz was a friendly, open person who'd also been mature beyond her years. She and Gail would sit together in class and have lunch together, and they would talk about what they wanted to do when they grew up.
Well, it seemed that neither one of them had gotten to do that; at least, not in the way that they had thought. But, even though Gail felt badly for Liz that she hadn't gotten to live a full life on Earth, she was overjoyed to see her old friend here now.
Liz was still laughing about the rednecks. "They called me a dolphin-kissing, tree-hugging, Femi-Nazi," she told Gail delightedly. "Then, Jerry - that's my husband - told them I was a vegetarian, too, and I thought they were all going to have heart attacks."
Now Gail was laughing, too. Liz had always had a bubbly, effervescent personality, and an infectious laugh. Only she could find those kinds of things funny. "Wouldn't that have been a shame," Gail said with a wicked grin, prompting another burst of giggles from Liz.
"Well, if they did, it's a pretty safe bet we wouldn't see any of those guys here," Liz commented. She smiled at her friend. "But, let's talk about you. I've been dying to see you, ever since I found out you were MY Gail. Everybody here talks about you and Castiel like you're not even real. Is it true you're running to be God, too?"
"Yeah, but I don't expect to win, or anything," Gail told her. "That's complicated, too. I'm mainly just trying to make sure that Patricia doesn't win. I'm sorry; I hope you're not rooting for her."
"Are you kidding?" Liz said incredulously. "You know me. Do you think I'd go for somebody like her? SHE'S the Nazi, as far as I'm concerned. Anyway, I came looking for you for a couple of reasons: first, because I was hoping we could be friends again, and second, 'cause if it was true and you were running for the Office, I wanted to help your campaign."
Gail was touched. Liz's offer couldn't have come at a better time. And she was thrilled to see her best friend again. The only friend she'd ever had growing up, really.
"Hey, do you remember that time I fell off the monkey bars and split my head open?" Liz asked Gail now, abruptly changing gears.
"How could I forget?" Gail responded. "That was the first time I found out that I had my healing powers. I'm not sure who was more freaked out, me, or you!"
Liz smiled warmly at her friend. The two girls had been playing in the school playground at recess. It had been just the two of them. She couldn't remember how young they'd been, exactly, but even then, they'd been shunned by the other kids. Liz had climbed higher than she'd ever climbed on the monkey bars. She had looked down to the ground to get Gail's attention, and then she had lost her grip. She fell to the sandy pit below, but on her way, she'd hit her head on the metal, opening up a cut on her forehead. She'd been too stunned to cry, but Gail had rushed over to her friend, horrified at the sight of the blood coming from her friend's wound. Panicked, Gail had put both of her hands on Liz's head where the wound was. Suddenly, there was a momentary glow, and the cut was healed.
"Holy Moly," little Gail had breathed.
"What?" Liz had asked. "Is it bad?" Her hands went to her head, and when they'd come away clean, she'd looked at Gail with wide eyes. "What happened? What did you do?"
"I don't know," Gail had said in a small voice. "You had a big cut on your forehead, and now, you don't."
"Did you do that?" Liz had asked her.
"I guess so," Gail had replied dazedly.
Then, Liz had smiled. "That's great! When did you learn how to do that?"
"I don't know," Gail said, mystified. "I've never done it before."
Liz had looked down at herself then, "Look at all this blood on my clothes. My mom is going to kill me."
Gail had made a face. She wished she could help her friend out with that, too. She knew how poor Liz's family was, and now, her clothes were ruined. Or, were they?
"You were so kind to me," Angel Liz said to Angel Gail now. "You took me to your house and begged your mom to wash my clothes for me. She had to do it three times, but the blood finally came out."
"You were my best friend," Gail said to her. "What else could I do? And then, we made a pinky swear not to tell anybody what I had done, because we knew it wasn't normal."
"But your mom knew, didn't she?" Liz said. "She wasn't even surprised."
"Yeah, she knew," Gail said, sighing. "Anyway, it's kind of funny: now that I'm an Angel, I have the power of healing. But so do you, and so does everyone here. I have a bonus power or two now, though. I could have cleaned your clothes, too. Once again, it's a long story. We'll have to get caught up."
Liz opened her mouth to tell Gail what else she'd seen that day in the playground, but before she could speak, Cas came breezing into the office, carrying a bouquet of roses. He stopped still.
"Hi, sweetie," Gail said, getting to her feet. "You're not going to believe it. This is my friend from grade school, Liz. She's the best friend I ever had, growing up. The only friend, really."
"Me, too," Liz said. She also rose to her feet as Gail approached her husband. Liz stared at Cas. Holy freholes. He was gorgeous! This was the famous Castiel?
"I thought these would brighten up your new office," Cas said, handing Gail the flowers.
"That's so sweet," she told him. She took the flowers, smelling them. She'd always loved the sweet fragrance of Cas's flowers.
"I'll get you a vase from one of the coffee rooms," Cas offered, smiling. "You'll want to keep it around here, somewhere. I have the feeling you'll be getting fresh flowers quite often. But, first..." He approached Liz, holding out his hand. "Hi, I'm Cas," he said to her.
Oh my God, Liz thought. Cas, yet. Everyone here talked about Castiel as if he were a legendary, larger-than-life figure, who might only exist in Greek mythology, or something. Granted, he was very handsome, and it looked like he had a great body, too. Oops, she meant "vessel", she supposed. He was wearing a blue shirt, black blazer, and blue jeans, and he seemed like a very down to earth guy.
"Hi, Cas," Liz said, shaking his hand. Then she giggled, and Cas looked a little disconcerted. "Sorry. I do that from time to time, especially when I'm nervous," Liz told him.
Cas's forehead wrinkled. "Why should you be nervous?" he asked her.
"Because everybody talks about you like you're already God," Liz replied.
Cas smiled, and Liz's knees went a little wobbly. Wow.
"That's funny. That's the same thing they were saying at my campaign office," Cas said mildly. He looked at Gail. "Riley's got a whole bunch of them there, working around the clock. You should see him. Give him a job to do and he's like a whole different person. I told him I didn't think my presence was even needed." He put his arm around his wife's waist, grinning. "Oh, and by the way, he's implementing your changes for the poster. I'm a little embarrassed about it, but I have to admit, the posters are striking."
"It's not the posters, it's their subject matter," she said, smiling warmly.
"I'll be right back with your vase," Cas said, and he promptly winked out.
Gail looked at the astonished expression on Liz's face, and she burst out laughing. "I know, right?" Gail said. "That's how I feel, every time I look at him. But I'll tell you what; he's just as gorgeous on the inside."
"I may have to switch campaigns," Liz quipped, and both of the women laughed.
Cas popped back into the office with a vase that was filled three-quarters full with water. He put it down on Gail's desk, then reached out his arms for the flowers. "Here, I'll do it," Cas told his wife. "Please, continue your visit. I'm so glad the two of you were able to be reunited. How old were you when you were friends?"
The women took turns telling him how they'd met, and about the fact that they'd been best friends all throughout grade school. "And then one day, you and Frank were gone," Liz said to Gail. "It was all over the news. We were all so scared. None of us ever knew anybody who'd been murdered before. I slept in my parents' bed for weeks after that, and I cried and cried because you guys were gone, and nobody knew where you were, or if you were even still alive."
Gail sighed. "That's a long story, too. Boy, do I ever have a lot of things to tell you. But you'll be glad to know that Frank is still alive and well, and he's very happy. Actually, Cas and I see him all the time." Then she frowned. "But that's just one reason we can't afford to let Patricia get elected. If she does, she said she won't let us go to Earth any more. We can't let that happen, Liz! Frank's wife is pregnant, and there's no way I'm missing that. I can't wait to laugh at him when he's changing poopy diapers and trying to get the kid not to spit up on him."
Liz snickered. "Remember how we used to torment him, whenever I came over to your house to play?"
Gail laughed. "Oh, man, now we have to get you an assignment to Earth. I can bring you over to his house, and we can torment him all over again!"
Cas was looking back and forth from one woman to the other, and he was smiling happily. It was nice to finally meet someone from Gail's childhood besides Frank who recognized how special she was. "Well, I can guarantee you if I'm elected, you ladies will get your chance," he said. "Just don't tell Frank I had anything to do with it."
They all laughed, and Cas finished arranging the flowers in the vase. "There," he said. "Does that look all right?"
Liz was amazed all over again. The Angel Castiel, fearsome warrior, arranging flowers. Unbelievable.
"It looks perfect," Gail said. "Hey, Liz and I were just about to talk about my campaign. I may not have a whole staff, like you do, but you can help us kick some ideas around, if you're not busy."
"Sure," Cas said, taking his wife's hand. He led her over to one of the couches and sat down beside her. He gestured to Liz. "Please, sit down. What did you have in mind?"
So the three Angels had talked strategy for a while, and then Cas had frowned. "You know, I still think we should extend the olive branch to Patricia first, before we get too carried away," he said to Gail. "All I've been hearing are rumours. I'd like to hear directly from her what her intentions are."
Gail nodded. That was a very reasonable approach. Maybe they were panicking for nothing. She looked at Liz.
Liz got the message. "I'll go back to my cubicle and work on some campaign slogans and stuff," she told them. "I've got some friends I work with; I'm sure I can get some of them on board. They want a female God, but they don't like Patricia." Then Liz looked at Cas sheepishly. "No offense intended, Cas."
He shook his head. "None taken. Gail has encouraged me to be a big believer in equality for women. I think it's high time that there are female candidates for the High Office."
Liz was becoming more and more impressed with Cas by the minute. Not only was he as handsome as anything, and attentive and loving to her friend, but he was obviously very intelligent, and he was enlightened, too. One day, when Liz's husband Jerry got here, she was going to make him follow Cas around with a notepad.
Once Liz left Gail's office, Cas took his wife's hand. "I'm so glad you and Liz have found each other again," he told her.
Gail smiled. "Me, too. She's a wonderful person, Cas. You'll really like her, once you get to know her better."
"I already do, because she's your friend," he said, kissing her gently on the forehead. Then he frowned slightly. "Are you ready to see Patricia now?"
"No," she quipped.
When they got to Patricia's office, Becky was just coming out of it. "Hi, guys," Becky said. "How are you?"
"We're fine, Becky," Cas said. "Is Patricia in? We're here to talk to her about the election."
"Yeah, she's in there. I just finished talking to her," Becky replied. "About work stuff," she added hastily. "I've gotta go. I'll see you both later." She hurried off as Cas and Gail looked at each other. Gail shrugged, and Cas tapped on the door. "Come," Patricia said.
As Cas and Gail were entering Patricia's office, Becky was going back to her own. Her heart had skipped a beat when she'd run into Cas and Gail, right outside. Obviously they hadn't overheard anything that she and Patricia had been talking about, or they would have been freaking out.
When Becky had gotten back to Heaven after Bobby's wake, she had done a lot of thinking. She'd taken Rowena's card out of her pocket when she'd gotten back to her apartment, and she'd just sat there, staring at it. How was she going to pull this off?
And then, she'd had the idea: Bobby was back in Heaven now, wasn't he? So, she'd gone to see Chuck in the library, and Chuck had told here where Bobby's cabin was. Chuck had devised a census program on the library's computer that was designed to keep track of all of Heaven's denizens, including where their offices were, where their homes were located, and other statistics, such as date of arrival. Once he had the opportunity, he was going to pitch the system to whoever ended up being in charge. When Bobby had returned, Chuck got his assignments from Laurel and he'd entered the information into the database. But there had to be a more efficient way to go about it than that. Chuck was pulling long hours working on that, so he'd been there when Becky had come to see him for the information. Chuck had given it to her, since she was part of their little group, but then that was another thing to add to his list of topics for discussion. When did privacy come into play, or, did it? Who would be in charge of disseminating that information? Should they maybe have a public directory, and also a private one? And who would decide which was which?
Becky had left Chuck to puzzle over those issues, and after a moment's hesitation, she had proceeded directly to Bobby's cabin. By that time, it was quite late, by Earth's standards. But none of them slept, time was fluid in Heaven, and Becky didn't want to wait any longer. So she'd gone to Bobby's cabin and knocked on the door.
"Hello, dear," Bobby had said. "Come in." They'd sat down at the table together. "How was my wake?" Bobby had asked her, his beard twitching with amusement.
More interesting than you'd think, Becky had thought. "It was good, Bobby," she'd said out loud. "It was nice to see Dean, alive and well. Everybody missed you, of course."
"Well, that's sorta what happens at a wake," he remarked. Then Bobby looked closer at her face. "Why are you here, Becky?" he said bluntly.
"I need an assignment to Earth," she answered in kind. "I miss everybody, Bobby."
He frowned. "I know who you miss, and it's not going to happen, Becky," Bobby said.
"Why not?" she asked him, frustrated.
"Because if Sam wanted a relationship with you, he would tell you so," Bobby said frankly. "I don't want to hurt your feelings, Becky, but deep down, you've gotta know that. It's best for you to just stay away."
Becky had looked down at the table. She had been hoping that Bobby would go to bat for her. She knew he had a soft spot for her. But he also went way back with the Winchesters, and his loyalties would always be with them. And Cas and Gail would be the same way. That only left her with one option. So she had said goodnight to Bobby, telling him that he was right, and to forget it.
Becky had gone to Patricia's office the next day, pleading her case. "I can be very useful on Earth," she'd said to her boss.
Patricia had looked at Becky coolly. It was all she could do not to roll her eyes. Patricia had known for a long time that Becky was hardly the sharpest knife in the drawer, but did she think that Patricia herself was stupid? She had no use for Becky on Earth; in fact, she had no use for any Angels on Earth. Patricia had made no secret of the fact that if she were elected to the High Office, no Angels would be going to Earth. Period. She reminded Becky of this now.
"But I'm one of the designated Angels!" Becky whined.
"Well, I didn't designate you," Patricia snapped. "You're wasting my time." She had been about to dismiss Becky from her office when it suddenly occurred to her that Becky might be of some use to her, after all. Becky was looking down at her lap now, but her head snapped up when Patricia said, "On second thought, we may be able to work out some kind of arrangement. How close are you to my opponents?"
"Bobby, and Cas and Gail? Very close," Becky said proudly. "I was at Cas and Gail's house for Christmas, and Bobby is like a father to me. I've spent lots of time with them."
Patricia reached for a pad of paper and a pen. Her mind was working furiously now. She didn't know why she hadn't thought of this before. Becky had been here under her nose this whole time.
"How did you meet Castiel and Gail?" Patricia asked the young Angel. "As I recall hearing around the time of the tribunal, it was in Las Vegas, wasn't it?"
Becky brightened. She loved telling that story. Even though she was a little bit mad at Sam right now for liking Gail, Becky had to admit that Cas and Gail's love was for real, and their story was really romantic.
As Becky was blathering on, talking about Castiel and Gail as humans, Patricia was taking notes. Then Patricia asked about Bobby, and Becky began talking about all three of them. Most of what the girl was saying, Patricia already knew, but she took notes anyway, letting Becky babble. Maybe Patricia would make an exception if she were elected, and actually grant Becky's wish. If there was a more annoying, empty-headed girl in existence, Patricia had yet to meet her. Perhaps she'd send Becky down to Earth just to get rid of her.
But then, Becky said something so surprising, so unbelievable, that Patricia halted her. "Castiel is WHAT?" she'd said, astonished.
Becky repeated what she'd just said, and Patricia began to smile. Now, they were getting somewhere.
By the time Cas and Gail had arrived at Patricia's office, she and Becky had finished their conversation. Patricia had been so shocked, yet so pleasantly surprised, by the information that Becky had given her that she had promised the young girl that if she achieved the High Office, she would make an exception, and send Becky to Earth. All Becky would have to do in return would be to let Patricia know if she had any more interesting stories about her friends. The girl had happily agreed. Patricia supposed that she was too stupid to realize that it was dynamite she had just dropped into Patricia's lap.
Patricia was still smiling when Castiel and Gail entered her office. "What a surprise, to see the both of you here," she remarked.
"Well, we thought it was time to start making campaign arrangements," Cas replied.
Patricia nodded. "Bobby visited me a short time ago, too. I was surprised to see him as well, and surprised that he was running. But it's his right, as it is both of yours. Your application forms were all in order. I know; I checked them myself. You just squeaked in under the minimum time for length of service," she continued, looking at Gail. "Perhaps we should have tightened up that criteria," Patricia added, sniffing disdainfully.
Gail restrained herself from rolling her eyes. If Patricia thought she was being subtle, she was sadly mistaken. Cas's jaw clenched, but he said nothing. They had agreed on their way over here that they wouldn't engage in an argument with Patricia. There was nothing to be gained by it.
"You may have heard that I will be teaching at the Academy shortly," Cas said in a calm voice. "And Gail will be resuming her chairmanship on the board. We just thought we would come here and inform you, as a courtesy."
"Fine," Patricia said in a clipped tone. She looked at Gail. "I trust you will not be looking to enact any laws on your board."
Gail's forehead wrinkled. "The laws already have God's seal. We just have to fine-tune them." You should know, she thought. You were there. "You drank champagne with us to toast that fact, remember?"
"How could I forget?" Patricia said archly. "Alcohol, in Heaven. One of the hallmarks of your proposed administration, I am sure. Well, just so YOU know, I have resigned my post on the board. I felt it would be a clear conflict of interest. But I'm sure such things don't concern the both of you, do they? Neither of you feel as if you're bound by convention, or decency."
"Why are you being so insulting?" Cas said angrily. He couldn't help it. What was her problem?
"I don't think I'm being insulting, merely 'telling it like it is'. Don't your humans talk like this, Castiel?" Patricia said, affecting an innocent tone.
Cas opened his mouth again, ready to let her have it with both barrels, but then, the most inconvenient thing happened: his cell phone rang. He took it out of his pocket and looked at the Call Display. "Dean," he told Gail.
Patricia sat back in her chair, smirking. "Well then, by all means, answer it, Castiel. We all know where your priorities truly lie."
Cas answered his phone. "What is it, Dean?" he asked tersely.
"Good news," Dean said happily. "Nicole called. She said she thought about what you said, and she forgives me! Isn't that great? Thanks, buddy!"
"Yes, that's great, Dean," Cas said quickly. "Is there anything else? We're kind of in the middle of something, here."
"Oh," Dean said. "Sorry. Say hi to Mrs. Buzzkill for me. And, Cas? The next time you guys are...well, you know...you don't have to answer the phone. That's what Voice Mail is for."
Cas was uncomfortable. He knew that Patricia had no idea what Dean was saying now, but she was staring at him as if she did. "Dean, I'll need to call you back," he said.
"There's no need for that, Castiel," Patricia said loudly, her lips tightly pursed. "We're done here. Get out, and take your little..." She reined herself in, but just barely. There would be plenty of time for truth-telling later on, when there was an audience of Angels to hear. "Take Gail with you."
"Who's that?" Dean said in Cas's ear? "What's going on?"
Cas was angry again. He was perfectly entitled to take a phone call from his best friend. Who the hell did Patricia think she was? And Cas had no idea what she'd thought she was going to call Gail; he only knew that she was extremely lucky that she hadn't uttered it. "I'll call you back," he said into the phone, and then he hung up on Dean. Then, he faced Patricia. "Gail and I came here to pay a courtesy call, and you've been nothing but rude to us, ever since we got here," he said coldly. "You are not yet God, and if we have our way, you never will be. You are just another Angel, and when you address my wife, you will keep a civil tongue in your head."
"And what if I don't?" Patricia retorted. "Are you going to pull your blade on me? That's your usual response, isn't it?"
"Come on, Cas, let's go," Gail said to her husband. All this was going to do from this moment on was deteriorate. She took Cas's hand and tried to pull him towards the door, but he stood his ground, glaring at Patricia. "We thought of you as our friend," he said to her. "You attended our wedding."
"Yes, where you vowed to obey her," Patricia sneered. "I suggest you do so right now, before I have to have you removed from my office. Go see your precious humans, Castiel. The more time you spend away from Heaven, the better off we all are."
"Let's go, Cas!" Gail urged. She yanked harder this time, and thankfully, he followed her out the door. The two of them stood out in the hallway outside Patricia's office for a minute, and then Gail said, "What did Dean want?"
Cas took a deep breath, then let it out. He told her what Dean had said, and she laughed. Cas raised an eyebrow to her, and she laughed again. "Did Patricia loan you the stick she's got up her bum?" Gail asked him teasingly. "Come on! That's funny!"
He made a face. "Yes, I guess it is. His timing couldn't have been worse, though."
Gail had to admit that he had a point, there. "Let's pop down there for a minute and see our 'precious humans'," she said, imitating Patricia's prissy tone. Cas laughed. She was so cute. "Yes. Let's," he agreed. The Angels linked hands and popped out of Heaven.
Patricia had heard them laughing. They had made no effort to lower their voices. Her hands clenched into fists. How dare they? How dare they strut into her office like they were the King and Queen of the entire universe? Well, they had better laugh, while they still had the chance. They would be crying, very soon.
She grabbed a pencil and dug the pointed end into her arm, ripping open the flesh. Every time she saw the two of them, she saw Lucifer. And every time she saw Lucifer, she felt the overwhelming urge to harm herself. She looked down at her arm. There was a gaping wound in it now. She barely felt those any more, but she had gotten blood all over her blouse and the surface of her desk now. She frowned. She really had to stop doing that. She was a candidate for the High Office. She couldn't afford any appearance of abnormality.
Patricia pushed the button for the intercom on her phone, and her secretary came into the office. Velma gasped. "What happened?" she asked her boss.
"I had an accident," Patricia told her. "Could you please heal me? Then I think I'll go home and rest. I have a splitting headache."
"It's no wonder," Velma said sympathetically. "You've been working so hard lately." She rushed forward, placing her hand on Patricia's arm to heal her wound. Then she happened to look down at the desk and saw the puddle of blood there, with the bloody pencil sitting right beside it. She looked at Patricia inquiringly.
"Well, don't just stand there," her boss said irritably. "Get a rag, and some cleaner. I want that desk spotless when I come in tomorrow morning." Then she sighed. "I'm sorry, Velma. It's just this headache. I'll see you in the morning." She rose to her feet and hurried out of the office. Velma stared at the desk for a moment, and then she went off in search of cleaning supplies.
