Forever is About to Start

Chapter 3 - The Eve


It was New Year's Eve and though he thought Serena would already be back in town, she wasn't. He didn't want to believe she was in a romantic city as Buenos Aires with someone else. It hurt him and he tried to ignore that by this time she and Aaron have already had sex.

He didn't have plans for the night and he just decided to be at home with his dad who wasn't in the mood of parties either. Rufus never explained to him why he and Lily couldn't be together but just like him, he was savoring the pain of loving a van der Woodsen and can't have her.

"Are you sure you don't want to come?" asked Jenny running out of her bedroom

"I'm sure" said Dan "Give my best 2009 wishes to Blair and Eleanor" he completed

"Mine too" said Rufus from the kitchen

"Okay, I should go before I get late. I can't believe Eleanor invited me" said Jenny excited

"You made her wedding jacket, of course she would invite you" said Rufus faking a smile

"Well, I should go, bye, happy new year dad" she said hugging Rufus

"Happy new year, daughter" he said

"Happy new year, Dan" she said hugging him as well

"Happy new year, have fun" he said

Before they broke apart their embrace she whispered on his ear "I'll let you know if she is there"

"Thank you"

"Any plans?" asked Rufus after Jenny left

"Nothing. You?" asked Dan

"Maybe we could watch an old movie" suggested Rufus

"That sounds good" said Dan now him faking a smile


"What is she doing here?" asked Penelope

"My mother invited her. Fortunately she didn't bring her father and Cabbage Patch" said Blair rolling her eyes

A few minutes later she excused herself and let her friends to take few words with her mother

On her way Jenny stopped her "Happy New Year, Blair" she said with a sincere smile

"Thanks, you too" said Blair in a hush

"Do you have news on Chuck, is he alright?" asked Jenny as Blair passed by her

Blair stopped on her heels and closed her eyes. She didn't want to show to anyone that she missed Chuck and was worried about him but she was surprised by Jenny question. She turned around and looked to Jenny. Sadness apparent on her eyes

"No. He is nowhere to be found. No one knows about him. I hope he is fine I let him a New Year greeting" said her minimizing the letter she had texted to him minutes before she walked down stairs and not mentioning the hundreds of text messages she sent him since her mother wedding.

"He will be fine. He is probably hurt by his loss. I'm sure in time he will come back and you will be the first person he will want to see" said Jenny nicely

Blair nodded and turned to leave again when Jenny inquired one more question

"What about Serena and Eric? I came to visit them but the weren't home" she asked

"Serena is somewhere on South America and she will come back on Friday. I have no idea where Eric is. Now if you excuse me I have to go find my mom" she said

"Sure" nodded Jenny


She is still in Argentina. She will come back on Friday. J

Dan was relieved he finally had news on Serena. Even if she was staying more than 10 days with Aaron on Argentina, he was happy she will be back within two days.

"More wine?" asked Rufus

"No, I think both of us already had enough. I'm going to bed before I have a headache and wake up tomorrow with a hangover after drinking with my dad"

"I'm not even close to be drunk" said Rufus honestly

"Yeah, I know, a rock start might have be more alcohol tolerance than a novel writer" said Dan smirking

"How is the writing?" asked Rufus serving himself another glass of wine

"Fine, broken hearts are great to writing" he said

"I know, the best songs I ever wrote was after Lily broke up with me and disappeared" Rufus confessed

"Can I ask what happened between you?" asked Dan

"Back then or now?" his father inquired

"Both, if you feel willing to let me know"

"It is not that they are any different. What happened now was just me finding the truth of what happened before" said Rufus sipping his wine

"Secrets can never be good. I learnt this from Serena"

"No, they can't, especially if they involved a child you never knew about, that was born in France and gave to adoption" Rufus said leaving the room straight to the bathroom letting a shocked Dan behind "A boy, by the way" said him on his way to wash his face mixing water and tears

Dan felt his father needed a moment to recover of such serious confession and left to his bedroom. He knew his father will look for him to explain it better if he felt up to. He gave Rufus the space he needed to face this chocking reality.


Though Jenny thought that spending New Year's Eve at Eleanor's would be for the best she felt like she was out of her place. She didn't know anyone and Blair and her friends weren't more receptive than they had been back on Constance. For awhile a young man distracted her but not feeling compelled to continue the small talk she excused herself and went to the kitchen where she found Dorota wearing a beautiful white outfit.

"Happy New Year, Dorota" said her hugging the nice woman

"Happy New Year, Miss Jenny" she has with an honest smile

Jenny finally found herself comfortable and talked to Dorota and also James, Eleanor's driver.

"S, I can't hear you, let me got to somewhere calmer" said Blair leaving the living room and heading to the kitchen not realizing Jenny was there with Dorota and James

"Hey S, now it is much better, are you on a Carnival or something?" Blair asked a bit too loud

"Are you watching Tango? Don't they know it is New Year's Eve, not Tango night?" asked a perplexed Blair

"How is everything? Why did you take so long to call me again? I don't hear from you since Christmas' Eve. By the way I'm totally returning that Channel dress and getting something else. You know I look pale on light pink but thanks anyway"

"Now details. How is your trip? Is Aaron as good in the deed as he seems to be?" asked Blair with a naughty smile and still with her back to Dorota and Jenny

"I can't believe you won't tell me anything now. I know it is best to tell this in person and that he is by your side now but you could at least share a nasty detail I can't wait for two days, this city is just boring when you are not around I have nothing to do to spend my days."

"Fine, fine, you are no fun, S"

"No, still no news" said Blair losing all excitement of her voice when Serena asked about Chuck

"I hope so."

"I miss you S, happy New Year"

"Thank you, bye" Blair said and left the room without ever look in the back of the kitchen where Jenny evaluated if anything was worth texting her brother. Choosing to take the decision at home and turned back to her conversation with James and Dorota.


Dan was laid in his bed, thinking about he father just told him. Suddenly his situation with Serena seemed almost insignificant. Trying to elaborate something to say to his father he frightened by the soft knock in the door.

"Come in" he said

"Sorry, I had to… refresh" his voice cracked

"Dad" said Dan standing up "I don't know what to say. This is just overwhelming" said Dan shaking his head and rambling

"It is and there is nothing to say" he said accepting the hug his son was motioning to give him

"What you are going to do now? Look for him?" Dan asked unsure

"I didn't think of it yet. He is probably 20 years old, I don't think I have a right to look for him now. Maybe he doesn't know he is adopted" reflecting on his possibilities

"Will you be able to live with this doubt?"

"I don't know, we loved each other so much. I felt like we could fight the world" said Rufus, his eyes brightening in face of what his life with Lily could have been

Both men stayed in silence for some minutes until Rufus finally interrupted it

"And why are you at home, watching old movies with your old guy? I have a good reason, do you?"

"It just seems like is nothing compared to what you have going in your life dad"

"I'm older son, my life is supposed to be harder than yours"

Dan was still on silence when Rufus broke the silence again

"Is it about Serena?" he asked

"How could it not be? Van der Woodsen women are handful, aren't they?" he said unsure, trying to mock themselves

"And worthy as far as I know"

"You still think Lily is worthy?" asked Dan really surprised by this father reaction

"She made a great mistake, not back there, but when we met again but she is a great woman, people are entitled to make mistakes"

"It is just I still love Serena, I never stopped but now she is in South America with Aaron"

"If you love Serena, son, don't let her go. They say in your age we don't know what love is but the truth is I did. What I felt for Lily I never felt for anyone else in my life and I never stopped feeling. I loved your mother, I really did and most of the years we spent together I was happy with her and loved her. But it didn't compare to what I felt for Lily and even now knowing that she never gave the chance to know my child and to decide his future, I still love her because a love like this never goes always completely. It just sleeps while you try to ignore but it never goes away. I will never be able to forgive her nor to be with her but I will never be able to stop loving her either. And if what you feel for Serena is this intense and you have this answer, then don't let anything nor anyone be in your way. Don't waste your time with anyone else and don't let her waste. If she can't see it now, than you need to have the vision for the two of you"

"I'm sorry for you and Lily, dad, I really am" he said as a tear rolled down his cheek

"Don't be son, we made our choices and we are dealing with the consequences, just don't make the same mistakes we did. If anything my story with her will bring you and Serena happiness then it was worth all this pain and disappointment and I would take it all over again if it makes a way to your happiness or Jenny's" he said hugging Dan

"Thank you dad, I love you." he said not holding his tears anymore

"I love you too, Daniel" said Rufus sharing his son emotions.


AN: First, I don't know if James exists and if, in this case, James is his name, in my world he exists, lol.

This was a very hard chapter to write and I hope you liked. I know you will like about the terrifying trip Aaron and Serena had.

I can't really thank you guys for the very nice reviews. Hope you liked this too.

Barbara