Disclaimer: I am not Tolkien.
AN: I'm really happy with the response this story is getting. Let me know if you have any suggestions or comments.
In response to a few of the messages and reviews I've gotten: I figure that the Valar are unlikely to be deliberately cruel. They intervened in Nina's life and pulled her to ME to fulfill some purpose so I figured that they would likely arm her to deal with whatever it is she is supposed to face (thus the basic archery/defense/horse skills). As for her being turned into an elf deliberately that's again a supposition on my part that they want her succeed and that they've already changed her enough that she was barely human as it was. An no worries things get harder for her now that she's in Lothlorien (not that all the crap she's dealt with in her life wasn't awful but she'll have a harder time dealing with what's to come) and upon request I'm thinking Nina may not be a natural born linguist. Let the fun begin!
Happy Reading!
Chapter 3: Lothlorien and the Turning Points
The Lady of Lorien had led her from the brook that had been her crossing point and into the city of Caras Galadhon and didn't appear to notice, as Nina did, the startled eyes of the Lothlorien elves watching them. To be fair, Nina was quite a sight in her sopping wet t-shirt, cotton short, and running shoes. Despite Galadriel's apparent disinterest Nina couldn't stop staring at the new world around her. Caras Galadhon was truly a city in the trees. Everything looked as if it had naturally grown to fit the purpose of the resident elves and even the stairs they two women ascended to reach the flet which was apparently Nina's looked as if the tree had grown them for her use. From the vantage point of the small circular tree house Galadriel pointed out several of the major landmarks. To the North, in the center of the city, the residence of the lord and lady could be seen. Just east of her Galadriel pointed out her garden and the clearing which held the mirror Galadriel assured her she would come to know quite intimately in the near future. The Lady motioned also to the training fields of the Galadhirm which caught and held more of Nina's attention as she flexed her hands longing for a bow like the ones she watched the warriors practicing with.
Seeing her fascination Galadriel smiled knowingly and broke the silence which had fallen during the young woman's distraction. "There will be a time for you to take up arms among the Galadhirm but for now you must rest."
Blushing at being caught unawares Nina apologized "My Lady I'm sorry!" Galadriel waved off the apology with a sly smile.
"You have been through much, my child. This flet is at your disposal and you will find nightclothes on the pallet. I have preparations to make. In the morning we will begin your training." Without so much as a goodbye Galadriel walked away leaving a stunned Nina staring after her with the most unfortunate feeling of having just lost her security blanket. 'When Galadriel is your security blanket you know things are going less than well' Nina mocked herself and decided that she might as well do as she was bid.
The flet was indeed much like a tree house or rather a circular hut built upon a branch of the massive tree. The doorway was covered by a screen of rushes much like the woven material which comprised the roof and the window coverings which were currently unlatched. Opposite the door was the pallet Galadriel has spoken of and aside from that there was only a small table with two chairs and a large trunk occupying the space. Eager to investigate what she assumed was her new home Nina knelt in front of the trunk and unlatched it only to find an assortment of gowns, underthings, nightclothes, and what appeared to be leggings and a few tunics (all in shades of brown and green). A light tan nightgown lay on the pallet that matched several others in the trunk. It seemed that Galadriel had used her advanced knowledge of Nina's coming to prepare for her needs. Nina was inexplicably touched by the Lady's consideration to her comfort and fought back tears of gratitude as the peeled off her still-damp clothes in favor of the soft, cap-sleved nightgown.
Though the sun had yet to fully set, Nina considered that perhaps a full night's sleep to recuperate her strength and process the events of the day would not go amiss. Sliding herself under the soft blankets of the thick pallet Nina stared at the unfamiliar roof as her mind slipped towards a clouded almost dreamlike state. The unfamiliar sensation made her flinch and blink her eyes rapidly. 'Of course' the confused woman's memory filled in the gaps 'Elves rest with their eyes open'. That thought- the small idiosyncrasy that she now had to adapt to was enough to break her fragile mask of calm. It was only hours later, in the deepest part of the night, that Nina's sobs of panic, confusion, and grieving acceptance exhausted her into the discomfiting dream-state.
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In the three weeks since Nina turned up soaking wet and dressed in clothing deemed beyond foreign to her new Elvish kin she'd come to realize a few things. Firstly, while she'd never considered herself a tomboy back home she was not exactly the picture of ladylike behavior in the eyes of the elleth around her. Additionally, while the Valar had seen fit to turn her into an elf physically they hadn't done anything to prepare her for the consequences of that transformation. The facts that she was now essentially immortal, that her senses and reflexes were well beyond that of the human she had been, and that she was in Middle Earth to begin with were still not feeling like reality as she turned them over in her mind.
The morning following her breakdown had begun badly and progressively gotten worse. A golden haired elleth had woken the sleeping girl with the sun. The woman, who Nina assumed was named Allenath for she repeatedly pointed to herself as she said the name and a string of incomprehensible words Nina was vaguely aware were Elvish, had brought a small breakfast of fruit and a pitcher of water into the flet and basically dragged the sleep dazed girl from her pallet towards a chair. After Nina had gotten the point that Allenath wished her to start eating the woman had swept over to the clothes chest and extracted underclothes and a deep green gown as well as slippers. The moment Nina paused in eating she's been dragged over to washbasin that hadn't been there the night before and was subjected to the not-quite-abrasive administrations of the attendant. In short, Nina found her face being washed as if she were a child and only barely restrained herself from grabbing the cloth from Allenath's hands in indignation. Something about the elder woman's countenance forestalled any action on Nina's part. She was then subjected to being unceremoniously stripped and helped into the unfamiliar undergarments and tried to remain still as Allenath fastened the seemingly endless buttons on the back of the surprisingly well fitting gown. After looking her up and down for a silent moment Nina detected a slight warming in Allenath's face and was pleased when the woman led her to the chair she'd momentarily vacated with a few softer alien words before her hair was brushed and braided back.
Apparently satisfied, Allenath took her hands and pulled her to her feet. Sensing that just speaking at the stranger wasn't going to yield any results all of her alien words were now accompanied by a physical clue. "Tolo ar nin!" Allenath murmured and she tugged on Nina's hand in an indication that she should follow. The elleth led Nina down the stairs to the mossy trail Galadriel had walked with her the night before. As was the case previously, all those around her stopped and stared. As uncomfortable Nina may have been with the elleth before she was now all but hiding behind her. Seeing her companion's distress Allenath glared at the gawkers who all turned their eyes away once meeting her displeased gaze. "Av'osto" She murmured to Nina comfortingly and grabbed her hand tugging her towards their unknown destination.
By the time five minutes had passed Nina was hopelessly turned around and prayed that Allenath would not leave her to fend for herself, fearing that if she did Nina would never find her way back through all the twists and turns of the intersecting mossy pathways. Finally, they broke into a clearing that was all too familiar. This was where Galadriel's mirror stood. Frodo would come to this place when the Fellowship came to Lothlorien and would see the possible future. Every time she thought she'd accepted that this was indeed real something else would happen to stagger her carefully constructed calm. "It's Galadriel's mirror" She whispered more to accustom herself to the reality than t converse with her companion who'd remained silent. Thinking to maybe at least learn something from her Elvish companion she pointed and repeated clearly "mirror" turning to Allenath hoping she'd understand what Nina wanted.
Watching the young stranger carefully Allenath pointed at the mirror as well and pronounced "Cenedril". Nina smiled and repeated the word trying not to botch the flowing pronunciation. She was unsuccessful. Allenath laughed softly, joy lighting up her solemn face and repeated the pronunciation until Nina finally said it to her satisfaction a few minutes later.
By the time Galadriel entered the clearing she and Allenath had managed to translate tree-orn and leaf-lass with varying degrees of success. Allenath, at least, was amused by Nina's struggle to pronounce the elvish words. Seeing the Lady's approach Allenath bowed before turning to Nina and "Novaer" before walking back the way they'd come. Nina was going to assume that was a goodbye and turned her attention to the beautiful Elleth in front of her.
"Good-morn Nina. How fared your sleep?" The knowing look in Galadriel's eyes forestalled any consideration of lying for pleasantry's sake as she would have back home.
"I fear that getting used to the seep of elves will be an… unpleasant adjustment." The unspoken 'as will everything else' hung in the air and the Lady smiled gently as if in sympathy.
"Would that I could give you the time to adjust and grow with your change my child" Galadriel took hold of her hands and squeezed them comfortingly before continuing "however, already Gandalf has dispatched young Frodo Baggins with the Ring. We have little time to prepare you. I fear your stay in Lothlorien may not be a peaceful as I had hoped. Already I feel you must begin work with the mirror."
"I don't understand. What am I supposed to do with the mirror? I know Frodo will look into it and-"Galadriel's raised hand stalled her.
"Your foreknowledge is not for my ears young one. I fear the burden must be yours alone to bear else I make an error that would change all. Indeed that is what you shall have need of the mirror for. You must carefully tread. Any action, any alteration to the course of events could end in our destruction." Nina despaired at the idea she would have no one to share the burden. How could she fulfill whatever purpose led her to this land if there was no one to guide her? The night before she'd taken for granted that Galadriel either already knew everything that was going to happen or would counsel her as to how she should proceed.
"How am I to know what to do, my Lady. I do not even know why I was brought here. Why would the Valar send one who knows events that will come to pass if they cannot be altered?" Nina winced as her tone took on a whining quality she would have liked to avoid.
"Child, not all events are set in stone. Your charge is to change what you will without taking any path that will further alter the course of events. Are there no sorrow's yet to come which you can think of to belay? The mirror will show you what you need to see. Consult with it to check your actions. If something cannot be altered you will see the aftereffects of the intrusion you contemplate." Dozens of instances that hadn't sat right with her when she'd read the tale in her world flooded her mind. She could change the story? Not alter the big events, the ones that dictated the course of the fellowship perhaps but could some hardships be avoided?
Steeling her resolve and fostering this new fledgling hope she determinedly met Galadriel's gaze. "How do I do this?"
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Days later found Nina settling into an almost comfortable routine. Every morning Allenath woke her, left her a tray of breakfast, and left her to wash and dress herself (which was a welcome relief after their first morning together). Allenath eagerly tried to teach Nina more simple words in the flowing Elvish tongue but even when Nina managed not to butcher the words she rarely remembered them for long. Her mind was so overfull remembering every detail of the story she could remember that she had little room for anything else.
Once Allenath had approved of Nina's appearance and taken her dirtied clothes into a basket for laundering she would lead the newcomer along the paths which became more familiar each day towards the mirror. Rarely did Galadriel join her after the first morning when she'd instructed Nina in its use. "Gather freshwater from the spring and pour it into the basin. For most the mirror will show only what the viewer needs to see but for one such as you the vision will be directed by your questioning thoughts. Hold an alteration in your mind and let the mirror show you the path such a change will lead to." With that Nina had resolved to run through the course of events chronologically and tried not to let the endless train of cause and effect ruin her spirit.
So far, Nina knew she couldn't go to the council of Elrond unless she wanted to alter the makeup of the fellowship which would, of course, lead to ruin. She also could not warn the fellowship against the mines of Moria. Not only was it truly the only option for safe passage but also Gandalf needed to fall for future events to play out as they should. The lack of detail as to how a changed event led to such dire consequences piqued Nina's ire but she chose to accept that perhaps she did not actually want the flood of information the smaller details would give her.
For a brief moment on her third day of mirror-gazing Nina worried she may not be able to meet the fellowship for fear of altering their path but the hours spent watching images of the sad but hopeful company brighten a little with her influence and not sway any of their actions much beyond incidental motions which wouldn't effect later events she'd assuaged her fear and determined that her presence only served them positively for whatever reason. On this fourth morning Nina had determined that she would see if there was nothing she could do about Boromir's fate.
She found that often if she focused on the immediate action first and made sure it would not lead to ruin then fleshed out a more intricate scenario the use of the mirror left her less exhausted. So, as she set her mind to the prevention of Boromir's death. Visions clouded her mind- Boromir surviving the battle by the river only to die at Helms Deep, Boromir surviving both battles due to her interference only for his father to send him to his death leading the company Faramir was supposed to lead and being far less lucky than his brother. No matter what angle Nina tired it appeared the Gondorian was destined to fall before the ring was destroyed. She also sensed that the longer Boromir stayed in story the more small complications the company ran into. They took more time to get to the slaughtered Uruk-hai and thus their reunion with Gandalf and subsequent travel to Rohan's golden hall was delayed. Taking a deep breath and closing off the tail end of the images in her mind she lowered herself to her knees and allowed a few tears to fall. Boromir must die. How would she look the man in the eye when he came to Lothlorien without him seeing her utter sadness and guilt? Unwilling to continue with her searching in the mirror Nina gathered herself and retreated to the edge of the clearing where she was unsurprised to find her newest companion waiting.
Haldir had been assigned to her by Lady Galadriel after her first morning with the mirror. The lady decreed that her afternoons were to be spent adjusting to her new form and relearning the skills which were invariable affected such as her archery and self-defense. Galadriel also hinted not so subtlety that it would behoove her to learn the use of a blade. Haldir appeared to be less than pleased with the responsibility of essentially babysitting a strange young elleth who didn't even speak the language of her people. Nina secretly thought that he regretted ever learning the common tongue for that was clearly the main reason Galadriel had selected him.
The ellon had been pleasantly surprised when the stranger had proven to have more than a basic understanding of the bow. Yes her application of strength was off and her stance was uncomfortable in the beginning but considering what Galadriel had told him of her past (of which he only knew a little but enough to know that the elleth in front of him had not always been so) she was adapting well. On this fourth day of training he only needed to correct her once on the strength of her draw before she adjusted and shot an arrow directly in the center of her target. She grinned at her stern companion and he allowed a small twitch of his lips to show his approval. The approval disappeared when she threw her arms around him in a quick exuberant hug. As much as she appeared to be a mature elleth she often acted as if she was a child. 'Which she is,' he mused 'the Lady said she has yet to see her second ten span. By our standards she's very much a child.'
She had significantly less luck in her lessons with a sword and the elvish language lessons Haldir forced upon her every evening. "Relax your grip!" He cautioned as she raised her practice blade to block a downswing from his own blade. He immediately saw her try to comply and overcompensate leaving the sword lax in her grip. He sighed irritated as his next downswing tore the blade from her hands as opposed to jarring against her uncompromising stance as it had the last time. "I did not say to let go, child! You must find a middle point. Focus! You do not snap your bow with your grip of let it slide through your fingers- this is no different!" Nina cringed at the irritated tone.
"I'm sorry Haldir. It just feels wrong!" She was complaining and she hated herself for the childish impulse. Impulses seemed harder to fight these days. She supposed it had something to do with the depth of her emotions seeing to have become infinite in her change and the strength of passing fancy was almost overwhelming in her inexperience. The strain of the mirror's revelation that morning was not helping matters either.
Garnering his patience, Haldir sighed softly and corrected Nina's form again and again until the light was almost gone and he called an end. As remiss he was to admit it she had improved even if it was just the change from hopeless to completely inept. Perhaps he should wait to comment on the progress until he could use a kinder word. Nina, for all that she appeared to be handling the entire situation well, was clearly overwrought with emotions and they rarely seemed pleasant. More often than not he'd come across her crying at the mirror before she went to practice with him. He wondered what she saw in her future that was so bleak but he trusted that the Valar would not have brought her to Lothlorien only for her to despair at her fate.
"Enough Nina, let us retire for the evening meal. Will you brave the guard station tonight?" Haldir had tried to encourage the young elleth to dine with him with the Galadhirm in the evenings as she had not made many friends outside the serving woman Galadriel had assigned to her, himself, and the Lady herself. Her lack of the Elvin language was certainly not helping and, when he could persuade her to join him for the evening meal he combined it with a language lesson which usually went poorly. Skilled with a bow and graceful on a horse the girl may be but she was no master of languages. Even her common tongue was strangely accented and held a strange cadence to Elvin ears.
"I'll make you a deal. I'll come with you if you'll spar with me without weapons tomorrow." She grinned at Haldir knowing he would be reluctant. The first and only time she'd gotten him to spar with her he'd been astounded that he'd ended up pinned in a matter of minutes. Of course, the sight of seeing a woman grappling with a man in such a manner was highly improper but the girl clung to the one skill she seemed to have carried over from her world that she could best the stoic elf in.
"If you insist, child. Come along, we'll be late at this rate." Haldir took her arm and led her towards the dining hall the guard occupied.
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Two months gone saw a very different figure of the strange elleth occupying the woods of Lothlorien. Still she kept to her routine of morning trips to the mirror but these days she had learned to look for the most inconsequential of details to alter. Any ray of hope or happiness she could add to the lives of the fellowship of the people of middle earth was a gift to her. So many days had passed with only dark tidings from the glassy surface of the water that Nina had begun to despair of ever finding an event that wasn't a turning point.
She could go with Gandalf to Fangorn to meet with the hobbits and later the remaining company but she could not go to Rohan with them. She could go to the battle of Helms Deep and fight, but she could not keep the uruk-hai from setting off the explosive at the water grate. It seemed that for each small step she chanced forward she was immediately set back and she'd begun to despir at ever making an impact. Thus far the only fully positive change she could manage was warning an outrider of the Rohirrim that the villages along the river were to be attacked by the wild men. Not all could be spared but it was an improvement and news of the attacks would still get back to Théoden so he would still take his people to Helms Deep.
The one event she could not bear to look for a solution to as of yet was the death of the ellon who she now counted as a sort of adoptive older brother. She would do just about anything to ensure Haldir did not die in the battle but as she couldn't share his fate with him she despaired at finding a solution that didn't require her to look for alternative in the mirror. More often than not her searching's only turned up negative outcomes in the mirror and she'd grown to resent it.
It did not help matters that Haldir, at this moment, was on patrol. After the first three weeks of his tutelage he'd begun to take regular patrols again and more often than not he was gone a few days a week. Luckily, with time had come a slightly better grasp of the elven language, enough so that she'd been able to make friends with a few of Allenath's companions. With Haldir gone it fell upon his brothers Rumil and Orophin who spoke little of the common tongue. Despite the language barrier the brothers were determined to get her to a level of skill with the sword that was in their words "less embarrassing". They were hard taskmasters and she was improving slowly, depressingly so.
"Do you no longer search the depths my child?" The question stirred Nina out of her introspection to greet the Lady.
"Good morn my Lady. I am simply searching for a question I can stand the answer to. The answers I find wear upon my soul despite knowing what I do." So much time among the elves had formalized her language a bit and Haldir had told her that her accent was much less noticeable than it had been.
"Perhaps then it would please you to know that we've received news of the Fellowship crossing into the wood? They shall be here in less than a day." Galadriel's eyes sparkled knowingly as Nina grinned at the prospect of meeting the grey company at last.
"Indeed my Lady that is excellent news! And Haldir returns with them if I know anything! If only all news that reached me was as welcome." Her joy dimmed a bit at the recurring question of Haldir's fate.
Seeming to see where her troubles lay Galadriel patted her slumped shoulder and whispered in her mind as she turned and headed back to the path which led to her well-loved gardens. 'Perhaps you should simply ask the mirror what plagues your mind. I believe you may find a preferable answer.'
Bolstered by the Lady of Lorien's faith Nina filled the ever present pitcher with water from the stream and filled the basin. 'Can I forestall Haldir's death? Is it unnecessary as I hope it is?' The visions followed her earnest thought- She and Haldir together on the outer wall of Helms Deep battling Uruk-hai, Haldir not seeing the large monster behind him but Nina charging the beast, Haldir leading the surviving elves back to Lothlorien instead of this second in command as it was in the books, Haldir years later after the fall of Mordor making his way to a ship that would bear him into the West. Haldir did not need to die! If she could but be at Helms Deep she could stop at least that small misery!
With the joyous news she couldn't share with anyone Nina raced off to find Haldir's brothers to share the news of his imminent return and with guests. Her gin startled them as they'd grown used to her wearied reserve after her time with the mirror and after a few hours work with her blade she disarmed the young ellon they'd conscripted to spar with her. When she disarmed him a few minutes into the bout a startled "Agoreg vae!". Despite having never heard it turned to herself she knew that phrase well enough. You did well. 'It's not every day I hear that!' Of course, her hesitation at the surprising compliment resulted in the ellon drawing a practice dagger on her and being named the winner of the spar considering she had hesitated and he had gone for the 'kill'.
After a quick dinner with the Galadhirm Nina fended off the protestations that she stay up for more Elvish lessons and at last convinced the brothers that all she was good for that evening was dreams and exhausted sleep as they came to the stairs to her flet. "Lasto Vae Gwathel!" They chorused before leaving her to climb up the spiraling stairs. She still couldn't get used to them calling her their sister though she often thought of them as siblings. She'd always been an only child after all. This was certainly an adjustment. Shaking her head as she dressed for bed Nina swore to herself she'd finally get a good night's rest so she would be at her best for the coming of the Fellowship the next day.
AN: The fellowship will make their first appearance in the next chapter which I'm already working on. Obviously I'm not much of an expert on sindarian but I tried to include a few phrases I could work in. If you missed the translations they're below. Let me know what you think!
Tolo ar nin- come with me
Av'osto don't be afraid
Cenedril- mirror
Novaer- farewell
Lass-leaf
Orn-tree
Agoreg vae- you did well
Losto vae- sleep well
Gwathel- sworn sister
