Hello readers!
After the long wait, I am finally posting the next chapter.
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You are amazing.
However, I am really keen on reading your feedbacks, so I would appreciate if you will not be lazy to leave more and more of them.
Disclaimer: I do NOT own Naruto.
This chapter is T rated.
Enjoy!
Chapter 2: Bitter
Life is, for sure a strange thing. It's vicious, bitter, unforgiving and yet, so dear, so priceless to every human. Us, humans, we are the strangest creatures in the world. We claim, we possess, we pollute, we hate, we avenge, we never seem to forgive fully and yet, we are never able to wholly give ourselves to love. Day by day, it becomes harder, more opposed to love, to cherish, to care. We rather give in to minutely passions, momentary lust, animal, primal instincts, which lead us to the most unfathomable, unforgivable deeds. We find it hard, to forgive, however, we find it much harder, much unintelligible to understand. Humans, draw further and further away from each other, sinking into their dark, selfish world. As the world develops, we become less of a humane and more of a wild creatures.
Life does not give second chances. We are born for once. We never have more opportunity. And those, who don't take them, seize them, while they have time, are fools. The biggest cowards are the ones who run from problems by taking away their own lives. We can't hide forever in our shells. They are too fragile. Piece by piece, they will shatter and if we do not ready ourselves for it, exposure might blind us with its light.
The sun slowly, almost undesirably rose higher and higher on the baby blue sky. The first rays of sunlight hit and brought to life the village of Konoha. The birds started chirping, delighted by such a beautiful start of a day. The sun caressed every flower, every tree, every living creature within its range.
The Uchiha manor was overflowing with children's delighted cries of happiness and rapture. They were still kids, pure, untainted children, with no worries, no sadness, no emotions besides positive. Oh, how happy are the child years, nothing can ever compare to them. And it's such a misery, that we don't realize at a time, too eager to grow up. Only after years, with experience of this cruel, cruel world do we reminiscence and regret, wish and would sacrifice anything to go back, to be as careless and happy, as then. Because, once the rose-colored blindfold, that keeps us from seeing reality and lets us see through the eyes of a doll is removed, it never comes back to us. Never.
"Maaaaa" - whined Lily "will the bweakfast be weady thoon?"
"Quiet down Li, ma is already doing it, don't make an extra fuss" - spoke Ami, with sisterly seriousness.
"Sure, sweetie, just be patient, five more minutes."
Yesterday, after my little encounter with Sasuke, I barely fell asleep. Today, as always, I woke up next to an empty space. Judging by the coldness of it, it was evident, that he had gone a long time ago. Not that it was in any was surprising. He woke up at six A.M. every morning, well, every morning that he was home. If he did come back early, all he did was to play with children and ignore me. I sighed bitterly. After all these years, I still couldn't get over the fact, that he had no feelings for me at all. I must really be annoying and worthless, if I couldn't make him at least care for me throughout all these years.
I fed my children and packed Ami lunch for the academy. After I got Lily and Itachi to their playroom, I started on my chores. My hands and feet led me automatically, already too used to housework.
When Sasuke and I married, he made it clear, that I had to give up a career of a kunoichii. He said, I quote, that 'he would not have an Uchiha matriarch wandering around the world, doing nonsense, while the housework remained undone'. However, I still had shifts at hospital and went on medical conferences and rare missions, if the other team medic was unavailable.
I was just finishing my daily business, as there was a knock on the door. I quickly made my way to hall, unlocking the door. There stood my ex-sensei - Kakashi in his ANBU attire. He still had that stupid mask on and my mind floated back to the times, when Sasuke, Naruto and I would wonder what was hidden behind it. As time passed, Kakashi and I became good friends. That is, until Sasuke and I married. After that, he insisted I stop interacting with male population of the village. So we drifted apart. However, I loved him dearly. He was one of my best friends despite the age difference.
-Hello Kakashi.
-Good afternoon Sakura.
-Come in, please.
-I'd be glad to catch up with you, but I am here on the orders of Hokage-sama.
-Oh, he wants to see me?
-Hai.
-All right. I will be out shortly.
-Sure. I'll wait for you.
I skidded down the hallway and up the stairs. I entered my room and quickly changed into more proper clothes.
Kakashi and I made our way to the Hokage's office. The walk was full of silence. All of the unspoken words exchanged in simple gestures. Kakashi was a great friend. He understood me. Respected my decisions. With no questions asked. And I was grateful for it.
When I opened the door, with my ex-sensei following right behind me I saw Naruto's face was angry. It's like he was arguing with someone. My eyes searched for another person in the room. There, in all his glory, stood my husband. His facial features were one of the deep scowl. Something was not right. I could practically smell the tension in the air.
I searched for any kind of acknowledgement in his eyes. However, as usual, none came. There was only a deep murmur of my name. on the other hand, Naruto's face softened and he welcomed me with his usual cheeriness, though his smile never reached his ocean-blue eyes.
-Sakura… - he began. - As you probably know, Village hidden in the mist is holding an annual medical conference.
He was right, I did know.
-Of course, I am aware.
-Your presence is required there.
I heard Sasuke growl and mutter something underneath his breath.
Naruto was on his feet in a flash, his expression absolutely furious.
-This is quite enough Uchiha. We have discussed this and decision is not to be changed. Understood?
-Whatever Dobe. - he sneered, his voice dripping with venom.
-Naruto, is there no one to take my place? There are plenty of qualified healers in the village. And I have children -
-Sakura, firstly, the only healer I would trust with this mission is Hinata. However, she, as you are aware, is pregnant. Children will be staying at Hyuuga compound with me and my wife. You will be accompanied by Hatake Kakashi and Uchiha Sasuke. This is final. No more complaints. You leave in two hours.
We all agreed. I did not want to question Naruto's decision. His tone told me, that the matter was not open for discussion. However, as I made my way towards the exit of his office he called out for me.
-Sakura, stay for a moment. I'd like to have a word with you please.
Sasuke stiffened beside me, mimicking my gestures. He was about to follow me back in, when Naruto spoke again.
-Privately. - he said, his eyes flickering to Sasuke. Kakashi, of course long gone.
Sasuke opened his mouth several times, wanting to argue, for sure. But eventually, he slipped out of the room, giving us some privacy.
-Trust me, I will not take long. I just wanted to tell you something.
-Of course, go ahead.
-Sakura, I am extremely disappointed in the way of your life. However, who am I to judge? Just answer me on this sole question. Is he worth everything?
I felt lump rising in my throat. My eyes burned with the force of unshed tears. It took me several moments to find my voice.
-Yes. - I replied firmly. Trying my best for my voice to be firm. It was not the uncertainty of the answer, no regret. I just wanted to bare my soul to him. Tell him exactly how much I would miss out on, having not married Sasuke.
He held his head high. His jaw set.
-All right. You may go.
I turned to leave and once again he stopped me.
-And Sakura? - he said.
-Yes?
-Take care.
-I will. - I assured him as I slipped out of his office and made my way towards the Uchiha compound.
When I entered the house, it seemed quiet. I slowly walked to my room, only to be met with my husband packing his things. He did not notice me as I went in. I silently slipped into the bathroom, craving hot water, which could hopefully relax my tensed muscles.
I was right. As I slipped into the shower, I closed my eyes and gave into the force of my emotions. Tears slowly trickled down my cheeks, and I flinched at their touch.
I do not know how long I stood there. Nor did I care.
Eventually, Sasuke's voice broke my emotional reverie.
-Sakura. - he shouted. - would you fucking come out already? It is enough that I am stuck with you on this mission, and now we will be late because of you.
I instantly hopped out of the shower, closing off the water. I dried myself off with my towel and put on my normal Jounin attire, minus the jacket. Instead I wore black tight shirt, with an Uchiha symbol in the back. I put my hair into a messy bun and fixed my hitai-ate on my neck.
I exited the bathroom and came face to face with my angry husband. He eyed me suspiciously for a moment before he scoffed and laughed.
-Do you cry all the time?
-I - I… s-sorry I… just… - I stuttered, bile rising in my throat once again.
-Save your damn excuses for yourself. After all these years still so weak, so worthless. Piece of shit.
I froze at his insulting words.
Don't cry.
.Cry.
You.
Are.
Not.
Weak.
Good things come to those who wait.
Patience.
Someday he will care for you.
Someday, maybe, just maybe he will love you.
With these thoughts, I tried my best to keep calm. I did not even believe any of it anymore. But, I needed something to hope for. Just anything.
I made my way to the closet to pack my things.
-Be downstairs in ten minutes. - Sasuke said, well, more like demanded.
I just nodded.
Before I could blink, he was behind me, turning me around and gripping my wrists harshly.
-When I speak to you, answer me. Do not disrespect me ever again, you worthless piece of scum. - he snapped at me. - Understood?
-Yes. - I whimpered and he let go of me instantly. He was out of the bedroom in a flash.
I looked down at my wrists. They were already changing colors. I was not too surprised. I was bound to have bruises after his iron grip.
I swallowed hard as I continued packing.
Finally, after I put everything together, I opened my bedside drawer and pulled out my diary.
During the years of living in despair and misery, during many sleepless nights filled with tears, this little notebook has been my only release. It was like a best friend to me. Every single word written there was complete truth. This diary was keeper of so many secrets, I lost count. I picked it up quickly and put it inside the bag.
I quickly made my way downstairs and into the hall, where Sasuke was waiting for me. As I looked at him, I sighed. After all these years, his face was still void of emotions.
We silently walked through the streets of Konoha. People, as always stared at us. They always did. After all, we were 'The Famous Uchiha Family.' They often whispered how they wanted to be in my place. Being Sasuke's mistress, matriarch of the Uchiha name.
They also gossiped how ugly I was, how Sasuke could have done so much better. They still flirted with him, doing everything to get in his pants. Of course, they were after his looks, wealth and authority. He did not mind one bit, though. Whereas old Sasuke was annoyed and irritated with fan-girls, the grown one used it to his full advantage.
Yes, you heard right.
Uchiha Sasuke was not a faithful husband.
In fact, he was far from it.
He, of course thought he was being discreet.
Oh, how wrong he was.
At times, I wish I did not know.
At times, I just wanted to be a naïve, little girl.
At times, I wished to not know him so well. Because, every time he lied to me, I could tell.
But, if he found happiness in somebody else's arms, then so be it.
Who was I to interfere?
After all, I have only ever wanted for him to be happy.
I glanced his way, marveling at his stoic expression.
He was still so beautiful.
My personal angel.
Author's Note !
VIP! READ!
Soooo…. This is it…
I hope you liked it.
Well, anyway, I want to ask you readers something.
I have not been getting too many reviews on this story. So I have been wondering, maybe it is not interesting or well written?
I will post one more chapter after this and if reviews won't increase I will probably discontinue.
I don't know…
I will also put up a poll, so you can vote.
So, Read and Review I guess.
If reviews do increase I will, I promise update sooner and forget any thought about discontinuing this story.
Later!
Not Your Girl 555
