Chapter Three: Rage
May was going to be Skye's new supervising officer. She'd more or less had the idea forced upon her when the Bus landed and she locked up Ward. May wasn't against training Skye – in fact, she'd been excited at the prospect – but she quickly discovered that Skye was going about it all wrong.
Like their first session, for instance: Skye had excellent coordination, perfect for an aspiring combatant, and she was willing to learn. May recognized this, but she also recognized a simmering rage underneath Skye's focused exterior. Her movements were sharp and her usual snark was absent. In the second session, she recognized that Skye was too sullen and timid from a depression.
May blamed Ward.
Of course, her own emotions weren't exactly trustworthy on the subject of that particular person. Even her tai chi – usually an athletic alternative to her other meditation – was muddled by Grant Ward's betrayal and his subsequent actions.
May still hadn't been to see Fitz. She was afraid of what she'd do to Ward afterwards – although Coulson did promise her a bit of external torture. She planned on making good of that assurance.
May kept her emotions in check enough to recognize others keeping their emotions in check. She saw it in Skye all the time – lips pinched, arms too close to her body, words spoken staccato and sparsely. As a self-made introvert of sorts, May knew better than to press on that bubbling rage beneath the cool surface.
On their third morning training session, May took Skye to the gym's floor mats and tossed her hand tape. Skye caught it easily – good reflexes, May noted. So many good attributes of a field agent.
"No punching bag?" Skye asked, glancing around the gray room.
May tossed her bag onto a metal bench. "Hand-to-hand today." She pulled her hair up into a ponytail. "Unless you want bloody knuckles, use the tape."
Skye wrapped it around her fists slowly. "I've barely done any hand-to-hand," she said. "Only ever used the bags."
May kicked an old boxing glove – gross – off the mat. "Barely is a good start." She turned around and crossed her arms at Skye. "Done with that tape yet?"
Skye dropped the roll on the bench with a metallic, somewhat rebellious clang and gave her a cool look.
May restrained a sigh. It was going to be one of those mornings. Not even three days in and she already had her student analyzed more than Shakespeare. She motioned Skye out onto the mat and pulled her arms up into the classic beginning position.
Skye took the form easily. "I know this," she said. She shook May's hands off.
May ignored her sharp tone. "Then show me a jab."
Skye did. It was too stiff.
"Loosen up," May said. "You'll only hurt yourself."
Skye got tighter instead.
They went on doing jabs, counters, and anything simple May could think of for five minutes, except Skye did the opposite of whatever May told her to do. It was then that May decided to stop – she was fed up with Skye's emotions getting in the way of training.
"We're done," she said. She ripped the tape off her fists – what a waste – and wadded it up.
"What? We've barely done anything."
"I'm not training you until you're ready to be trained." She took the tape from where Skye left it and tucked it into its pocket in her bag.
"I'm ready now!"
May, with her back turned to Skye, rolled her eyes. "You are not."
"Why?" Skye demanded.
"You're too emotional."
Skye gaped at her.
May threw her tape ball in the garbage, shouldered her bag, and walked to the door. "If you're up to it, I'll see you at our evening session."
"Wait, May!" Skye jogged up next to her. "I need to train," she said, drawing out the vowels.
"Get your emotions under control and then we'll talk."
Skye pulled her hair out from underneath her shoulder strap. "Please train me."
"I am. Just not at the moment."
"Why not now?"
"You're too emotional."
"I am not emotional!"
May stopped walking, but she kept her eyes trained forward. "You are, and you know it. You know why." She turned her gaze to Skye. "I'm not your best friend – I'm not your mother. I'm not going to put up with your angst."
She started walking.
"Why are you so... so... cold?" Skye half-screamed. May grimaced but kept going. "You say that I'm emotional – but have you looked in a mirror lately?"
Her shouts echoed down the empty corridor as May turned the corner.
Later that evening when May was finished with her paperwork, but before she was supposed to meet with Skye, she decided to go down to the labs and see FitzSimmons.
She winced at the thought – those two people, so in sync, relegated to their current position. It made May's fists clench, more than ready to punch something.
Skye had been right – May was emotional. It was impossible not to be. With Ward lurking at the back of her mind, Fitz and Simmons struggling to survive, and even Coulson's mysterious carving, May had let her emotions slip through.
May sighed and went down to the labs.
She'd seen his room from the corridor and knew that the windows were covered with sheets Simmons had put up. She wished she could see into the room before she entered, bringing back ample memories of her going into unknown locations for dubious reasons in the name of SHIELD. This would not be as easy as those were, she knew.
May knocked softly. "Simmons?" She slid the door open and poked her head in. The room was empty save for two sleeping forms – Fitz on the bed and Simmons seated in a plastic chair, head resting at Fitz's feet.
Her stomach flipped.
The number of tubes and wires and lines attached to Fitz left her speechless – and renewed her hatred of Ward. The innocent man on the bed was frail, unmoving, pale, and absolutely dead to the world. His face was hidden in a mask giving him oxygen, a consistent rise and fall in his chest. May felt sick.
She was too emotional.
Simmons, though she was also sleeping, was infinitely different than Fitz. Her breathing was erratic, like she was dreaming. Nightmares, May remembered Skye saying. She'd had her own fair share of those.
May spotted a clipboard hanging at the end of the bed. She flipped through the pages and paused at a diagnosis section.
Head trauma.
Hypoxia.
Nitrogen narcosis.
Those and other unfamiliar terms were listed on the page, coupled with Fitz's medical history. There were daily doctors' notes scribbled at the bottom.
Day one: non-responsive, coma.
Day two: broken arm set in cast.
Day three: no change.
Day four: no change.
There were five total days where there was "no change" in Fitz's condition – the length of time she'd been there. She set the clipboard down. He'd been in a coma for a week.
A whole week.
No change.
May tucked Fitz's blanket around him – unnecessarily since it was already tucked and he wasn't moving – and walked back out into the corridor. She made it back to her room and collapsed against the door, head turned upward as her heart pounded and her thoughts raced. These emotions would be the death of her.
The clock read five in the afternoon – she had time to meditate before her session with Skye. May grabbed her workout bag from where she tossed it that morning and headed down to the gyms once again.
They were all empty, of course. May sat down on the old, sweaty mat in the center of the room, crossed her legs, and closed her eyes. She focused on the thump-thump of her heart and the hum of the air-conditioning unit. She relaxed her body and listened as the heartbeat slowed to a calm, constant pace.
Inhale.
FitzSimmons. Pain. Sadness.
Exhale.
Her heart remained steady. Repeat.
Inhale.
Coulson. Confusion. Worry.
Exhale.
The world around her faded into the background. She barely noticed the door creaking open and the footsteps shuffling over. She barely noticed the young woman sit down across from her and mimic her position. Repeat.
Inhale.
Skye. Pride. Frustration.
Exhale.
The room was silent. Repeat.
Inhale.
Ward. Betrayal. Rage.
Exhale.
Repeat.
Hi, friends! I hadn't planned on this scene – I was struggling with how to write May and if I would write her very much at all. Turns out, she's a blast! She and Skye are now the owners of (one of) my favorite plot lines! So, you'll be seeing more of them. ;)
Thank you so much to my one reviewer (hello, Guest!), my one favorite (hello, jackie c2!), and my four new followers: hello, AerynGwendolyn, CountryGal760, mickimouse (love your name!), and rapter9800! Thank you to everyone for reading this little story, and I hope to see more of you in the near future! (seriously, some reviews would be awesome!)
As I said last chapter, I'm open to any and all suggestions (as long as they are not inappropriate) and I'll try and write them all! So, if you have anything you want to see, let me know and I'll get on it!
I do not own Agents of SHIELD. Obviously.
Also, I'm still looking for a beta reader! If anyone is interested, message me and we'll work something out! :)
Next time: Skye, Trip, and FitzSimmons have a sleepover!
Have a stupendous day!
