Feelings

I remember my first day after moving to Heights Alliance, U.A. dorms that the #1 ranked high school for heroics built for its students after the events of the training camp and the battle between All Might and All for One, which meant the retirement of the #1 ranked hero. I remember that after unpacking my things, the girls wanted to do some kind of room contest with the boys. The first one to test his luck was no other than Deku, as I call my best friend, when really his name is Izuku Midoriya. Although he seemed to be upset or ashamed for his All Might's things, I found it somehow cute. After the contest was done, we parted ways each of those who participated (Tsuyu and Bakugo decided not to take part). However, after that, I asked Deku, Ilda, Todotoki, Yaoyorozu and Kirishima to come out with me, where Tsuyu was waiting to talk about what they did in their mission to save Bakugo from the League of Villains. She said all what she wanted and finally peace seemed to come at least for a bit to our lifes.

However, who could say that having strange feelings for your best friend could be so embarrassing. I mean, not that I'm ashamed of Deku, to the contrary, I appreciate him very much, but not knowing why our relationship change (although I know but I don't want to accept it) so much to the point I cannot see him straight to the face without remembering what Aoyama said during our practical exercise against Thirteen. However, telling the girls only lead in Mina insisting that it was… love. The others were so eager to know and, if not for Tsuyu and Yaoyorozu, I don't know how I would have managed against the duo of Mina and Toru. However, that night I slept little and nothing due to only having thoughts about a certain green haired boy that was training outside mere minutes ago, trying to master his ultimate move for the provisional licensing exam. Thank god I had time to gather my thoughts before the exam because I don't know what I would have done if I failed due to these feelings.

After the exam, I couldn't help but feel uneasy because of a certain fawn hair woman from Shiketsu high school. Why my thoughts kept going to that woman? Because of what I heard (eavesdrop actually, but they are just non important details) from Kaminari and Mineta (who were shouting and probably everybody there at the lobby heard them) about Deku being behind some rocks with that woman before Sero and I reached him. I couldn't help but feel something new, totally different from what I felt before. I could have been… jealous … of her? That night I shook my head multiple times trying to eliminate that thought and say that it was completely impossible to: first, feel jealousy from a woman I don't even know if we will see again; second, feel like Deku was the kind of boy that would do something that perverted with someone risking his license (I don't think even Mineta would have do it in those circumstances); and third, Deku and I weren't even a thing, so there was no real reason to feel jealous. I mean, not that I want to be with Deku… just the two of us… alone. After all, that day I made a promise to put my feelings for Deku away in order to focus on my goal. After all, my parents were counting on me; I couldn't distract myself with a… romantic topic.

However, nights prior to that one, I couldn't help but still think about my decision back then. After all, my thoughts were only about how I wanted to match Deku. Of him and how he could anticipate the candidate to become the number one hero Mirio Togata, being the only one (Bakugo and Todoroki didn't take part of the practice) who at least made the third year student to react. And although I was so set up in putting these feelings away, looking at him, so focused in showing what he can do after his house arrest (all of Class 1-A heard about his fight against Bakugo in the middle of the night after returning of the exam) and even deciding to be the first one to test his strength. I couldn't say I didn't admire that, and that night, that casually was yesterday, I couldn't help but feel as that feelings started to arouse again.

That's why I'm here, in the middle of the night, turning and tossing in my bed not knowing well what I should do. On one side, I know that the decision I took was a reasonable one, trying to focus principally on my hero path in order to help my parents and after that, maybe start to think about having a relationship. On the other hand, I'm starting to think that maybe if I continue to ignore my feelings for Deku (it sounds so weird to think that), it may turn upside down for me as probably I'll distract myself because of not knowing how to act around him, what may cause some not so pleasant surprise in the school practical exercises. After not knowing well what to do, I decided that maybe thinking about Deku as… more than a friend… could not be so bad. With that in mind, I dozed off into a slumber with images of Deku in my mind.

The next morning, I thought I would wake up feeling a little numb for staying up so late as sometimes happened; however, I feel almost as if… I was renovated. With a big smile on my face, I went down towards the common room where I found no one. To my surprise, I woke up pretty early, so I decided to look for something to drink. While I was making my way towards the fridge, I heard someone coming in through the door leading outside. As if destiny was playing with me, the green haired boy I became so fond of. He greeted me with that big smile of his while his hands were his hands were busy with two cups of, what I supposed, was coffee. "Good morning, Uraraka." I returned the smile with a great feeling in my body. "Good morning, Deku. I see you are already prepared for today." Deku just continue to make his path towards her, making her feel a little flustered because of how close he was getting. Even though, something weird caught my eye. "Hey Deku, why do you have two cups of… coffee? Were you… expecting to give it to someone?" I have to control my jealousy. With a little chuckle, Izuku said "Actually, the employee confused my order and gave me two cups and I couldn't find in myself to turned it down. I'm a little ashamed of that." I was sure he would be scratching his neck if he had a free hand, a gesture I get accustomed. "Actually, do you want the extra one, Uraraka?" That took me by surprise. Actually not so much after knowing who was offering me a cup, but never failing to be so generous towards others. "I would love to Deku, but I don't think I should." Deku stretched his arm towards me as if saying… "I insist. After all, that's what friends are for." Being startled a little, I finally accepted his offer and turn towards the common room with him to prepare for a breakfast. While talking excitedly about possible exercises we could have today, I could only think about Deku and how an awesome person he is. After all, if my mornings could always be like this, him and me having a nice conversation while drinking coffee and welcoming a new day, then I wouldn't care to deal with these feelings.