"River, I swear, one hour and I'll be back," he called over his shoulder through the TARDIS, "Jammie Dodgers, just the thing to fix you up!"
River rolled over and smiled against the brightening lights of their bedroom. "You are such an idiot!"
The Doctor's head popped around the doorframe, "Yes, and you love it." The TARDIS had taken to keeping their chamber next to the console room since her pregnancy, she assumed so The Doctor was never more than shouting distance from her.
An answering grin spread across River's features, "Yes, Dear, I do. Now go, before I decide against letting you out on your own."
He gave an overly elaborate court bow, "Your wish is my command fair lady," and with that, he left River to snuggle back down amidst the plush warmth of their bed. In fact, she'd been spending a great deal of time there in the month since she'd woken one morning to find herself pregnant. They both had actually, she thought, and she felt a warm flush come over her; that man of hers.
The Doctor had tried very awkwardly to explain a Time Lord pregnancy to her that first day, but somehow, he just couldn't get it right. Then, she'd seen the proverbial light go off in his head and he had thrown his hands up in delight. "Ok, right," he'd said, "you grew up on Earth, 20th/21 century right?" She had nodded her head and looked at him like he was a complete moron. "Bear with me, Super Man."
She gave him a very River eye roll, "Super Man," she dead panned.
"Yes, Super Man. Super Man was an alien baby, shot into space in his very own space ship incubator kind of thing. And while he was hurtling through space to get to Earth, he was learning all sorts of things about the universe, right?"
River sifted through her memories as Mels, centuries old now. There it was, Amy and Rory and Mels, huddled together with popcorn and an inordinate amount of candy watching Superman on Amy's mum's telly. "I never got the whole Superman thing," she started, "I mean really, how stupid are people? He's clearly Clark Kent, he's just wearing glasses. How can he date someone so stupid that she can't figure that out?"
He smirked a bit at that, it always amused him how worked up over fictional characters River got. She hadn't spoken to him for a week after he'd said he didn't like her favorite movie, well, complete rubbish is what he'd called it: honestly, some sweaty archaeologist being chased by Nazis and almost squished by giant boulders. "River, focus," she was usually the one admonishing him for rambling, "do you know what I'm talking about?"
"Yes, yes, blue tights, red pants, Marlon Brando's voice over, got it."
"Perfect, well, you're like the spaceship."
"Careful," she'd pulled away from him and given him a menacing glare, "I'm this size because of you."
"No, no, well, now that you mention it," the look on his wife's face said she was in no mood for teasing, "right, so Time Lords have always been a rare breed, and as you know, something that could be very dangerous if a Time Lord baby were to fall into the wrong hands." Yes, of course she understood that last part. "We develop very rapidly so that we can spend six months observing the world around us, learning from a somewhat protected vantage point. Gives us a bit of a head start when we come out."
River made a sound of disgust at the thought of a baby "coming out," certainly wasn't something she was looking forward to, then another thought came to her. "But Doctor, are you saying the baby knows everything we're doing and will remember it?" She wasn't exactly feeling up to their usual private escapades at the moment, but she was certain that wouldn't last long, definitely not six months long.
"Why River," he smirked, "afraid little Bob might witness something nefarious between his old mom and dad?" He wriggled his non-existent eyebrows suggestively.
"Well, yes, and absolutely not! We are not naming a child Bob."
"Sadly, Stormageddon is taken, I am rather partial to Joffrey however."
River laughed and quirked an eyebrow, "And what on Earth kind of name is that?"
"Not Earth, Westerosi, parallel universe and what not, have to take you sometime." He then thought about the ramifications of River running roughshod through the Seven Kingdoms, and thought better of it. "So, was that a no?"
"Most assuredly, but can you tell then, that it's a boy?"
He ran his hand lovingly over her stomach, "No, we could always use the scanner though, if you're up for it?" They hadn't moved from the bed in the hour or so since her regeneration.
"No, I rather think I'd like a surprise for once. But Doctor, really, the baby, how much of what we do will it," she searched for the right words, "be aware of?"
"Well, from what I remember, it's more a feeling really, I knew that I was safe, and loved, and that there was a great big universe out there just waiting for me. That and I came out with a serious dislike of tomatoes, still not sure what that's about." He smiled and tucked a curl behind her ear, unused to the uncertainty in the green eyes that met his, "Our child will know that he has the most gorgeous and brilliant mother any child could hope for, and a complete madman for a father, and that they would do absolutely anything for him or her."
She'd kissed him then, sweetly for once, and told him that she loved him before drifting into a blessedly dream free sleep.
The Doctor straightened his bow tie and flung the TARDIS doors wide, "Doctor!" Clara brushed past him into the console room, "This has been the longest month of my life, I swear! Where have you been?" He spun to look at her, mouth agape.
He immediately grabbed her by the elbow and pushed her towards the door, "Clara, not really a good time, rather busy at the moment." He stopped dead in his tracks as she was protesting, "Wait, hang on, how did you know I was going to be here?"
"Doctor," River appeared in the room, robe clad, belly leading the way, "you forgot your wallet," her voice dropped off at the sight of Clara. The girl hadn't seen her since Trenzalor, well, technically it had been her data ghost, which was probably why she'd gone all pale and big eyed.
"You're alive, I mean, The Doctor told me you were, but still," Clara stepped towards River with an outstretched hand as if she needed to touch her to believe it for herself, "you're young."
"Pregnant," River had pronounced at the same time, laughing at Clara's observation; of course it would be the age regression that struck the girl. River knew well and good the feelings the human had for her husband, knew Clara thought she had a shot with him, even after she'd escaped the Library. But now, confronted with her regenerated form in the flesh, the look of jealous defeat beneath the shock on Clara's face sent a petty thrill through River. Part Time Lord she may be, but she was still a woman and like it or not, love was always a competition and showing up a rival always felt good.
Clara swallowed hard as her eyes travelled down to the obvious swell beneath the gold silk of River's robe, "Um, congratulations?"
River's lips turned up in a sly smile, "Thank you dear," she said as she tucked The Doctor's wallet into the pocket of his coat and gave it a pat. The Doctor shot River a look that said, "be nice," before she pecked him on the cheek and gave him a wink.
"Right," he said, straightening his coat and attempting to regain his composure, "so, Clara, what are you doing here?"
"Um, hello?" She held up a newspaper with an advert for The Impossible Girl, "You said to meet you here, now."
"No I didn't," he wasn't liking this one bit, especially not now with River in her condition.
"Well then who did?" Clara asked.
The Doctor peered cautiously through the open TARDIS doors, "That's what I mean to find out."
