Dangnambit, you dirty Blue! Stop breaking the little green computer!
Disclaimer: Rooster Teeth owns Red vs Blue, guys. You'd have to be Caboose to think we do.
BEFORE POST EDIT: I see I have foreign viewers. Hello. Uh, no hablos espanol.
~•~
"Felix, why are you a jerk?" Texas asked, before a thought crossed her mind. "Is Dee still broken?" she wondered. "Deee! Deeeeee! Deeeeeeeeee!"
Delta remained silent.
Epsilon looked at the green AI, "Yeah.. He's definitely broken..."
"Uhhh. Tucker did it!" Texas exclaimed, to which Caboose shot her a thumbs up. Meanwhile, Delta began to turn red with anger.
"What the fuck? No I didn't!" Tucker protested. "Lying bitch!"
"Run like a bitch," Texas announced, seeing Delta change colors. She turned back to Tucker. "Oh, yes you did!"
"I DIDN'T!" Tucker tried to say, "I swear, people always putting the blame on me.."
Jessie stared at the color-changing Delta. "Uh... Is that normal?" she asked, slowly.
"NOPE! RUN!" shouted Texas, "Haven't you ever seen episode 18 of season 10? Heheheheh, takin' a page out of Caboose's book."
Jessie, paused, "Wait, why would I need to run?"
"Cause he'll, like, yell really loud," replied Texas, "It'll hurt your ears."
Jessie looked at her, "..I have earplugs.."
"Well I don't," stated Texas. Thinking about Jessie having earplugs, she stated, "Why do you even have earplugs? Seriously, who actually thinks to buy them, 'cause I never do and I need some."
"Hey! It's good to be prepared for anything!" Jessie defended. "That's logical, right, Dee?"
Delta turned towards Jessie, now glowing redder due to her usage of words. "Uh, Dee?" Jessie nervously asked.
"Run," Texas warned, "Ruuuuuuuuuunn! Or use your earplugs." She paused for a second. "Actually, he might start crying. I don't know anything."
Jessie shoved her earplugs in quickly. "JESSIE!" Delta's voice boomed, her earplugs quickly proving to be useless.
"Ouch! My ears!" Jessie cried, covering them as best as she could. "What did York do when you were in his head?"
"DO. NOT. SPEAK," commanded Delta.
Texas answered Jessie's question, "He died. That's what York did. I told you he would be loud!"
"YES, I know he died!" Jessie yelled, ears ringing, "But, just wow! I didn't know Delta could-could.."
"DO NOT SPEAK OF HIM AS IF YOU DON'T CARE!"
"Woah, what?" Jessie asked. "As far as I know, he, along with everyone else in the God-damned universe, doesn't exist! I don't have to care!" She stopped, looking at Delta. "...Aaaand you just grew ten times your size..."
"You are going to die now," Texas stated bluntly. "Just 'cause, like, he's so loud your ears explode." She shook her head, remembering the situation, "Run, run, run! Or look up!"
"I'm gonna step back now..," Jessie said, slowly. "And you're back to normal again. What the hell happened to you, Delta?"
Delta looked towards Jessie. "I do not understand what you are talking about."
"Oh, you have gotta be fucking kidding me.."
"Deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeelta. You did the mad thing," Texas explained.
"I do not understand what you are talking about," Delta repeated to Texas.
"The mad thing, the one where you turn GIANT and RED and VERY VERY ANGRY!" Texas tried to tell the AI.
"I do not have the ability to be angry."
"WELL YOU DID!" Texas shouted, an idea coming to her, "..Dee."
Delta only flashed a faint red, ".. Do not call me that...please."
"Because York called you that and he died blah blah blah yeah I kno-" Texas went over what she had just said. "Oh. I think I'm going to die for that."
Delta faltered a little, "I... Do not want to talk about this anymore. I would like to change the subject."
"Whoops," Texas said, "You don't have to say that, all you have to do is change it."
Delta looked at her, "What is your current status?"
"Ummmmmmmmmmmm," Texas thought about it. "SARGE! PLEASE TELL US HOW THE BLUES ARE HORRIBLE! YES! CHURCH AND EVERYONE ELSE WILL ENJOY THAT! FOR SURE!"
Sarge heard Texas, and gathered everyone around him, making them sit down. "Let me tell you all the story of How the Blues Stole Christmas."
~•~
Ho ho ho, you just got SARGED!
